"I like the misery"
Well, not really.
It's just that when I DO get sick, I tend to get much more devotional afterward.
I have food allergies, and have to occasionally do a controlled test on a food product to see if it is, in fact, going to make me sick. (To clarify: I'm not looking for histamine my-throat-has-swollen-shut reactions, I'm looking for the puking all day or bloated like a walrus reactions, don't worry) It's one of those parts of life that sucks, but there's absolutely nothing to do but deal with it.
Maybe it's that when I'm sick I seek comfort, maybe I feel like I'm being punished and want to make it up somehow. Actually, it's definitely both of those things. I just end up thinking about my practices and devotion a lot more when I'm sick.
I'm writing this in hope that remembering these things will make today easier. Because today was another food test, and after the last one I need to remember that my gods and my sickness aren't tied up in a negative way, but in a positive one. The gods don't hate me. I do try to remember that.
It's just that when I DO get sick, I tend to get much more devotional afterward.
I have food allergies, and have to occasionally do a controlled test on a food product to see if it is, in fact, going to make me sick. (To clarify: I'm not looking for histamine my-throat-has-swollen-shut reactions, I'm looking for the puking all day or bloated like a walrus reactions, don't worry) It's one of those parts of life that sucks, but there's absolutely nothing to do but deal with it.
Maybe it's that when I'm sick I seek comfort, maybe I feel like I'm being punished and want to make it up somehow. Actually, it's definitely both of those things. I just end up thinking about my practices and devotion a lot more when I'm sick.
I'm writing this in hope that remembering these things will make today easier. Because today was another food test, and after the last one I need to remember that my gods and my sickness aren't tied up in a negative way, but in a positive one. The gods don't hate me. I do try to remember that.