A hard day's night
Oh, livejournal friend(s), it's been the most victorious of days.
Today, as harped about previously, I took the GMAT. Some things to understand about this awful test and its scoring: 1) It's stupid hard 2) Most decent business schools admit students with a score of 500+ 3) On all of my Princeton Review replicating tests, I scored 500-510. 4) When taking into account the anxiety + unpreparedness I'd feel, I theorized I'd emerge victoriously if I scored above 500.
By whatever grace of god, I scored 610.
I have no idea how this happened, and still cynically think that it was some computer error. Taking the test was an awful experience. First of all, the eastern view from the eighth floor testing center, though beautiful, prominently displayed my ex-boyfriend's apartment; the one he moved to after I kicked him out. Awesome. Secondly, I was entirely sure I bombed the math section. I paced myself horribly, time was running out and I was rushing, and I was unsure of my answers for a near 75% of the questions. As I predicted, my mind drew a blank on how to solve most of the math questions, and I became panicked. It was the worst feeling, you know, like in dreams--or at least the infrequently recurring dream I experience--when you're in a school play and it's your turn to recite your lines and you draw a complete blank though you've been practicing them to the point of exhaustion. Yeah, it was like that, only real. When I took my break after the math (and before the verbal), the room supervisor person was making chitchat with me. He sympathetically asked me how it was going, and kept reassuring me I'd do just fine, but I almost burst into tears. It was just so hard and so unfair, given how much I'd studied and how hard these questions were compared to the ones I'd been used to.
But it's over. It's done. And I don't have to front another $250 to take it again. Hooray! Now, much like I've thought previously, it's not a matter of being able to get into a business school. Now I have to decide what the hell I want to do. Business school? A generic Masters? Nothing? Fuck if I know. It's nice to know I have options. But everyone I know seems to be on a dedicated, precise path, and it sucks that I can't claim the same. Wah wah wah.
From the GMAT, I proceeded to go to a concert where I played the role of show photographer. And it was fantastic; I took some of the best performer pictures of my portfolio to date. Granted, they weren't for my personal use, but for that of a friend, so I hope he appreciates them and they go fun places. Because they were really good! Goddamn, do I miss having a camera, especially one that has manual settings. Especially a Canon!
On the way home from Hollywood, I treated myself to takeout from Bossa Nova, my longstanding favorite place to eat in LA.
So this week, all that's left tomorrow: wake up early to wait for the godforsaken DirecTV guy to show up, pack for FL, buy a hostess gift for Paul's mom, get a manicure/pedicure, endure the funness of a waxing, buy a wedding present and rent a car for Orlando. And then, when nightfall happens, go out for drinks in Old Town--something I haven't done in a while.
While I've been stressing about going to Florida and making yet another good impression on Paul's family, none of that really matters. Well, rather, I shouldn't be stressing about it as much. That's not what counts, really, and that's not my objective. I'm just glad I get to spend time with the boy I love--with whom it really doesn't matter what happens or when. It'll just be great to be there with him. And it'll be great to be in Orlando, if for nothing else, because I won't be dedicating all my energy to get the attention of this boy as per the past six or so visits. But I can relax and see my friends, and curl up in bed with my love at the end of the day. Perfect!
A good day indeed, coupled with great realizations (except the whole deciding what to do with my life part, but that'll come in time). While on one hand it's crazy to think that something such as a test score can so greatly alter my mood and attitude about things, but as usual, I'm thankful for the events that prove I'm not apathetic after all.
And now, if kitty ever gets off me, happily I sleep.
Today, as harped about previously, I took the GMAT. Some things to understand about this awful test and its scoring: 1) It's stupid hard 2) Most decent business schools admit students with a score of 500+ 3) On all of my Princeton Review replicating tests, I scored 500-510. 4) When taking into account the anxiety + unpreparedness I'd feel, I theorized I'd emerge victoriously if I scored above 500.
By whatever grace of god, I scored 610.
I have no idea how this happened, and still cynically think that it was some computer error. Taking the test was an awful experience. First of all, the eastern view from the eighth floor testing center, though beautiful, prominently displayed my ex-boyfriend's apartment; the one he moved to after I kicked him out. Awesome. Secondly, I was entirely sure I bombed the math section. I paced myself horribly, time was running out and I was rushing, and I was unsure of my answers for a near 75% of the questions. As I predicted, my mind drew a blank on how to solve most of the math questions, and I became panicked. It was the worst feeling, you know, like in dreams--or at least the infrequently recurring dream I experience--when you're in a school play and it's your turn to recite your lines and you draw a complete blank though you've been practicing them to the point of exhaustion. Yeah, it was like that, only real. When I took my break after the math (and before the verbal), the room supervisor person was making chitchat with me. He sympathetically asked me how it was going, and kept reassuring me I'd do just fine, but I almost burst into tears. It was just so hard and so unfair, given how much I'd studied and how hard these questions were compared to the ones I'd been used to.
But it's over. It's done. And I don't have to front another $250 to take it again. Hooray! Now, much like I've thought previously, it's not a matter of being able to get into a business school. Now I have to decide what the hell I want to do. Business school? A generic Masters? Nothing? Fuck if I know. It's nice to know I have options. But everyone I know seems to be on a dedicated, precise path, and it sucks that I can't claim the same. Wah wah wah.
From the GMAT, I proceeded to go to a concert where I played the role of show photographer. And it was fantastic; I took some of the best performer pictures of my portfolio to date. Granted, they weren't for my personal use, but for that of a friend, so I hope he appreciates them and they go fun places. Because they were really good! Goddamn, do I miss having a camera, especially one that has manual settings. Especially a Canon!
On the way home from Hollywood, I treated myself to takeout from Bossa Nova, my longstanding favorite place to eat in LA.
So this week, all that's left tomorrow: wake up early to wait for the godforsaken DirecTV guy to show up, pack for FL, buy a hostess gift for Paul's mom, get a manicure/pedicure, endure the funness of a waxing, buy a wedding present and rent a car for Orlando. And then, when nightfall happens, go out for drinks in Old Town--something I haven't done in a while.
While I've been stressing about going to Florida and making yet another good impression on Paul's family, none of that really matters. Well, rather, I shouldn't be stressing about it as much. That's not what counts, really, and that's not my objective. I'm just glad I get to spend time with the boy I love--with whom it really doesn't matter what happens or when. It'll just be great to be there with him. And it'll be great to be in Orlando, if for nothing else, because I won't be dedicating all my energy to get the attention of this boy as per the past six or so visits. But I can relax and see my friends, and curl up in bed with my love at the end of the day. Perfect!
A good day indeed, coupled with great realizations (except the whole deciding what to do with my life part, but that'll come in time). While on one hand it's crazy to think that something such as a test score can so greatly alter my mood and attitude about things, but as usual, I'm thankful for the events that prove I'm not apathetic after all.
And now, if kitty ever gets off me, happily I sleep.