You Say Goodbye and I Say Hello: As the World Turns fic; Luke/Reid
Title: You Say Goodbye and I Say Hello
Author: erikssiren
Fandom: As the World Turns
Characters/Pairings: Luke/Reid, Noah/Richard
Rating: PG-13 for cursing
Summary: Luke discovers Noah's secret, Reid comforts him.
Disclaimer: Anything you recognize I don't own.
Author's Notes: First, I have to say the title is what I get for listening to too much Glee the past couple of days. I couldn't think of anything, and that song has been on repeat in my head all day so I said why not? I wrote this when I first read the spoilers about Richard, so I guess this is technically AU now. And...yeah. I can't think of anything else to say. I need sleep.
Thank you to my wonderful beta, laurahellomoto. You're the best beta ever, I don't know what I would do without you!
Dr. Reid Oliver sighed as he glanced over the chart in his hand, belonging to the last of his patients to see before his shift ended. Noah Mayer. Excellent. He didn’t hate the guy, it’s just since the elevator Reid hadn’t been able to stop thinking about Luke and every time he saw Noah, the feeling intensified by proxy. Taking a deep breath, he walked down the hallway quickly, flipping through the pages in his hand.
“Well, Mr. Mayer,” Reid said as he pushed open the door to the hospital room, his eyes glued to the chart. “Looks like everything is in order for surgery tomorrow.” He closed the chart and looked up, surprised to see Noah wasn’t alone and that it wasn’t Luke. A dark-haired man stood beside the bed with concern Reid used to see on Luke, etched into his handsome features. Reid glanced at Noah, who had guilt written all over his face.
“Excuse me, who are you and what are you doing in my patient’s room?” Reid asked icily. “This is a private consultation, not a floor show.”
The young man glanced at Noah and then took a step forward, hand extended. “I’m Richard, Richard Drum. I’m Noah’s boyfriend.” Well, that was unexpected. Reid caught the wince on his patient’s face and Reid knew that had wanted to keep Richard his dirty little secret.
“For a blind man, you sure do move quickly, Mr. Mayer.” Reid tried to keep his tone aloof, but even he heard the layer of anger beneath. “Mr. Drum I don’t care who you are as long as you get out of my examination room. I’ll let you know when I’m done,” he added snottily when the man tried to protest. Drum took a step back toward Noah.
“It’s fine, Rick. Just wait outside.” Noah said gently. Luckily they didn’t kiss and the new boyfriend left with a glare at the doctor as he passed.
“Listen, Doctor Oliver, it’s not what you think. I-”
“I pride myself on not getting involved in my patient’s lives,” Reid said as he pulled a chair next to Noah’s bed. “But in this case I’ll make an exception. I’m not the one you should be explaining this to.” Reid didn’t mention that the only reason he was making the exception was because of Luke. As much as he hated to admit it, the guy was under his skin and he liked them there. “Now let me run these tests and you and Richard can get back to hiding behind closed doors.”
***
Luke paced in front of the doors leading to Noah’s hallway. He didn’t know he was coming here until he found himself parked in front of the hospital. Noah’s surgery was tomorrow, Reid had told him after a meeting for the Foundation, and Luke wanted to wish him luck. He just didn’t know if Noah wanted it from him.
Taking a deep breath, Luke pushed the doors open and walked slowly down the hallway. His heart thudded in his chest the closer he came to Noah’s room. Looking back, Luke knew if he hadn’t been so worried about what he was going to say, he would have seen though the window that Noah wasn’t alone.
The door was cracked so Luke went unheard as he opened the it to reveal a tall brunette leaning over Noah’s hospital bed, kissing him softly on the mouth.
Luke stopped just inside the door, not believing the sight in front of him. “Oh my God,” he whispered. The heavy door slammed behind him and the two jumped apart, and Luke felt his mind go truly and completely blank. He had heard people describing it happening, hell he had written it in his scripts, but he never knew what that meant until right now. It was like something else had taken over and it wasn’t doing such a great job. He could feel his breathing grow ragged, see the disbelief on his face and sense the shaking in his hands.
“Luke,” Noah breathed, panic and guilt laced in his voice.
You bastard, Luke wished he could say say. But his brain wouldn't cooperate, his mouth could do nothing but open and close like a dumb fish. The tall man stood in front of Noah’s bed, separating him from Luke as though he needed to protect Noah, as though he had the right to protect him. Something snapped inside Luke his breathing grew unsteady. How dare he? How could he?
“Luke, this isn’t want you think.” Noah pleaded, begged. Like he deserved forgiveness, as though he thought Luke should give it to him.
Luke’s brain still didn’t thaw out and he couldn’t respond, even if he wanted it to. He wanted to say so much, and yet he couldn’t bring himself to do it. So he threw what he had hoped was a disgusted and final look to the pair and quickly left the room. The air grew thin as Luke’s legs led him down the hallway and up a random flight of stairs. He thought he heard someone calling his name, but he couldn’t really hear anything over the blood rushing in his ears.
Luke pushed open a door and found himself on the roof, the same roof where Casey an Allison had trapped him and Noah after the mess with Brian. Luke bent over, hands on his knees and felt like he had been punched in the gut. Had any of it meant anything? Had Noah ever really loved him, or was Luke merely the experiment needed so he could feel comfortable dating other men? His heart was beating so fast he thought it might break, but it had already been broken so many times he didn't think there were any pieces left.
He stumbled toward the roof ledge and braced himself with his hands, his head bent. He stared at the dirty concrete, unable to think. Thoughts and memories and emotion battled inside his head in jumbled chaos. He needed to sort this out, he needed to think but he couldn’t gain control of his own head. He needed to calm down but couldn’t rid himself of his building anger.
Suddenly Luke felt a presence beside him and he looked over to see Reid staring at him impassively, a look that told the younger man the doctor knew what had been going on with Noah and that other man. The rage flared and Luke found himself gripping Reid’s jacket and shoving him backwards. “Did you help him, you son of a bitch?” He growled. “Did he get you to distract me so they could be together?”
Reid shoved back just as hard. “I’m not the one you’re mad at, Mr. Snyder.”
And just as the anger had filled him, it dissipated and Luke sunk to the ground, his back against the ledge. He buried his face in his hands, willing himself not to cry. Not in front of Reid.
“If you need a moment, I can turn away and pretend I don’t hear anything.”
Luke laughed into his hands and looked up at Reid standing beside him. He could feel the tears forming and he looked down at his shoes. “I’m such an idiot,” he muttered after a moment. “All that time I was worried about him, I felt guilty for caring, for wanting-” to move on. He still wasn’t sure what it was between him and Reid, but he wasn’t about to declare anything before he knew where they stood. “The worst part is he didn’t want to not be in a relationship anymore, just didn’t want to be in a relationship with me. And he lied about it.”
“You’re not the idiot,” Reid said as he sat down beside Luke. “He is. What made him think he was going to get away with it, in such a small town? Besides, you’re a good guy, Luke. You’re smart, kind, courageous, ambitious, and if you listen to town gossip, good-looking.” He tried to pass it off as a joke, but they both felt the small fissure of tension when Reid bumped his shoulder in a friendly manner. “You deserve better.”
Luke made to answer, but tears threatened again so he merely smiled and they sat in a silence filled with honking cars and singing birds. Finally he trusted his voice enough to speak again. “I don’t think I would be so upset if he had just told me the reason he wanted to break up because he wanted to see other people. Instead he made me feel like the bad guy and I believed it! I just, I don’t know what to think anymore.”
“Then don’t,” Reid said simply. Luke turned to him in surprised confusion. “Luke, ever since I met you you’ve spent too much time over-thinking things, despite my accusations to the contrary.” Luke chuckled lightly at this. “Try just going on your feelings on this. What is it you want to do right now?”
Luke studied him for a moment, his thoughts calming as Reid spoke. “Kiss you.” He expected a sneer or a scoff, not the soft smile that begun to spread across the doctor’s face.
“Okay,” he said before leaning in. Luke was surprised at how soft Reid’s lips were and how gentle the kiss was, despite the urgency behind it. He tried to push forward, to convey some of the desire that he had denied was building up inside him ever since they were trapped in that elevator, but Reid seemed content with slow and gentle.
“You know,” Luke said once they had parted, each a bit breathless, “some would say you are taking advantage of my fragile emotional state.”
“I don’t see any of them on this roof, do you?” Reid said light-heartedly but Luke could see the small flicker of fear behind his eyes, as though Luke was going to blame him for just that.
“No,” Luke said with a small smile before they kissed again. They sat on the roof for hours, even after the sun went down, ignoring the responsibilities that waited for them, talking and kissing. Finally it grew too late for them to ignore their buzzing cell phones any longer and as Reid kissed him one last time before heading inside, Luke didn’t find himself wanting to ask what they would do tomorrow or try and put them in a labeled box in his mind. He just knew he didn’t want to be away from Reid, and for now that was all he needed.
Author: erikssiren
Fandom: As the World Turns
Characters/Pairings: Luke/Reid, Noah/Richard
Rating: PG-13 for cursing
Summary: Luke discovers Noah's secret, Reid comforts him.
Disclaimer: Anything you recognize I don't own.
Author's Notes: First, I have to say the title is what I get for listening to too much Glee the past couple of days. I couldn't think of anything, and that song has been on repeat in my head all day so I said why not? I wrote this when I first read the spoilers about Richard, so I guess this is technically AU now. And...yeah. I can't think of anything else to say. I need sleep.
Thank you to my wonderful beta, laurahellomoto. You're the best beta ever, I don't know what I would do without you!
Dr. Reid Oliver sighed as he glanced over the chart in his hand, belonging to the last of his patients to see before his shift ended. Noah Mayer. Excellent. He didn’t hate the guy, it’s just since the elevator Reid hadn’t been able to stop thinking about Luke and every time he saw Noah, the feeling intensified by proxy. Taking a deep breath, he walked down the hallway quickly, flipping through the pages in his hand.
“Well, Mr. Mayer,” Reid said as he pushed open the door to the hospital room, his eyes glued to the chart. “Looks like everything is in order for surgery tomorrow.” He closed the chart and looked up, surprised to see Noah wasn’t alone and that it wasn’t Luke. A dark-haired man stood beside the bed with concern Reid used to see on Luke, etched into his handsome features. Reid glanced at Noah, who had guilt written all over his face.
“Excuse me, who are you and what are you doing in my patient’s room?” Reid asked icily. “This is a private consultation, not a floor show.”
The young man glanced at Noah and then took a step forward, hand extended. “I’m Richard, Richard Drum. I’m Noah’s boyfriend.” Well, that was unexpected. Reid caught the wince on his patient’s face and Reid knew that had wanted to keep Richard his dirty little secret.
“For a blind man, you sure do move quickly, Mr. Mayer.” Reid tried to keep his tone aloof, but even he heard the layer of anger beneath. “Mr. Drum I don’t care who you are as long as you get out of my examination room. I’ll let you know when I’m done,” he added snottily when the man tried to protest. Drum took a step back toward Noah.
“It’s fine, Rick. Just wait outside.” Noah said gently. Luckily they didn’t kiss and the new boyfriend left with a glare at the doctor as he passed.
“Listen, Doctor Oliver, it’s not what you think. I-”
“I pride myself on not getting involved in my patient’s lives,” Reid said as he pulled a chair next to Noah’s bed. “But in this case I’ll make an exception. I’m not the one you should be explaining this to.” Reid didn’t mention that the only reason he was making the exception was because of Luke. As much as he hated to admit it, the guy was under his skin and he liked them there. “Now let me run these tests and you and Richard can get back to hiding behind closed doors.”
***
Luke paced in front of the doors leading to Noah’s hallway. He didn’t know he was coming here until he found himself parked in front of the hospital. Noah’s surgery was tomorrow, Reid had told him after a meeting for the Foundation, and Luke wanted to wish him luck. He just didn’t know if Noah wanted it from him.
Taking a deep breath, Luke pushed the doors open and walked slowly down the hallway. His heart thudded in his chest the closer he came to Noah’s room. Looking back, Luke knew if he hadn’t been so worried about what he was going to say, he would have seen though the window that Noah wasn’t alone.
The door was cracked so Luke went unheard as he opened the it to reveal a tall brunette leaning over Noah’s hospital bed, kissing him softly on the mouth.
Luke stopped just inside the door, not believing the sight in front of him. “Oh my God,” he whispered. The heavy door slammed behind him and the two jumped apart, and Luke felt his mind go truly and completely blank. He had heard people describing it happening, hell he had written it in his scripts, but he never knew what that meant until right now. It was like something else had taken over and it wasn’t doing such a great job. He could feel his breathing grow ragged, see the disbelief on his face and sense the shaking in his hands.
“Luke,” Noah breathed, panic and guilt laced in his voice.
You bastard, Luke wished he could say say. But his brain wouldn't cooperate, his mouth could do nothing but open and close like a dumb fish. The tall man stood in front of Noah’s bed, separating him from Luke as though he needed to protect Noah, as though he had the right to protect him. Something snapped inside Luke his breathing grew unsteady. How dare he? How could he?
“Luke, this isn’t want you think.” Noah pleaded, begged. Like he deserved forgiveness, as though he thought Luke should give it to him.
Luke’s brain still didn’t thaw out and he couldn’t respond, even if he wanted it to. He wanted to say so much, and yet he couldn’t bring himself to do it. So he threw what he had hoped was a disgusted and final look to the pair and quickly left the room. The air grew thin as Luke’s legs led him down the hallway and up a random flight of stairs. He thought he heard someone calling his name, but he couldn’t really hear anything over the blood rushing in his ears.
Luke pushed open a door and found himself on the roof, the same roof where Casey an Allison had trapped him and Noah after the mess with Brian. Luke bent over, hands on his knees and felt like he had been punched in the gut. Had any of it meant anything? Had Noah ever really loved him, or was Luke merely the experiment needed so he could feel comfortable dating other men? His heart was beating so fast he thought it might break, but it had already been broken so many times he didn't think there were any pieces left.
He stumbled toward the roof ledge and braced himself with his hands, his head bent. He stared at the dirty concrete, unable to think. Thoughts and memories and emotion battled inside his head in jumbled chaos. He needed to sort this out, he needed to think but he couldn’t gain control of his own head. He needed to calm down but couldn’t rid himself of his building anger.
Suddenly Luke felt a presence beside him and he looked over to see Reid staring at him impassively, a look that told the younger man the doctor knew what had been going on with Noah and that other man. The rage flared and Luke found himself gripping Reid’s jacket and shoving him backwards. “Did you help him, you son of a bitch?” He growled. “Did he get you to distract me so they could be together?”
Reid shoved back just as hard. “I’m not the one you’re mad at, Mr. Snyder.”
And just as the anger had filled him, it dissipated and Luke sunk to the ground, his back against the ledge. He buried his face in his hands, willing himself not to cry. Not in front of Reid.
“If you need a moment, I can turn away and pretend I don’t hear anything.”
Luke laughed into his hands and looked up at Reid standing beside him. He could feel the tears forming and he looked down at his shoes. “I’m such an idiot,” he muttered after a moment. “All that time I was worried about him, I felt guilty for caring, for wanting-” to move on. He still wasn’t sure what it was between him and Reid, but he wasn’t about to declare anything before he knew where they stood. “The worst part is he didn’t want to not be in a relationship anymore, just didn’t want to be in a relationship with me. And he lied about it.”
“You’re not the idiot,” Reid said as he sat down beside Luke. “He is. What made him think he was going to get away with it, in such a small town? Besides, you’re a good guy, Luke. You’re smart, kind, courageous, ambitious, and if you listen to town gossip, good-looking.” He tried to pass it off as a joke, but they both felt the small fissure of tension when Reid bumped his shoulder in a friendly manner. “You deserve better.”
Luke made to answer, but tears threatened again so he merely smiled and they sat in a silence filled with honking cars and singing birds. Finally he trusted his voice enough to speak again. “I don’t think I would be so upset if he had just told me the reason he wanted to break up because he wanted to see other people. Instead he made me feel like the bad guy and I believed it! I just, I don’t know what to think anymore.”
“Then don’t,” Reid said simply. Luke turned to him in surprised confusion. “Luke, ever since I met you you’ve spent too much time over-thinking things, despite my accusations to the contrary.” Luke chuckled lightly at this. “Try just going on your feelings on this. What is it you want to do right now?”
Luke studied him for a moment, his thoughts calming as Reid spoke. “Kiss you.” He expected a sneer or a scoff, not the soft smile that begun to spread across the doctor’s face.
“Okay,” he said before leaning in. Luke was surprised at how soft Reid’s lips were and how gentle the kiss was, despite the urgency behind it. He tried to push forward, to convey some of the desire that he had denied was building up inside him ever since they were trapped in that elevator, but Reid seemed content with slow and gentle.
“You know,” Luke said once they had parted, each a bit breathless, “some would say you are taking advantage of my fragile emotional state.”
“I don’t see any of them on this roof, do you?” Reid said light-heartedly but Luke could see the small flicker of fear behind his eyes, as though Luke was going to blame him for just that.
“No,” Luke said with a small smile before they kissed again. They sat on the roof for hours, even after the sun went down, ignoring the responsibilities that waited for them, talking and kissing. Finally it grew too late for them to ignore their buzzing cell phones any longer and as Reid kissed him one last time before heading inside, Luke didn’t find himself wanting to ask what they would do tomorrow or try and put them in a labeled box in his mind. He just knew he didn’t want to be away from Reid, and for now that was all he needed.