(Untitled)

[theoriginalbamf]

Who: Kurt and Abigail...and then a wild Luigi appears!
When: Early afternoon
Where: CES
What: Breakin' up is hard to do
Warning: Elf Abuse? Puritan oaths! Religiousness, hurling of rocks

Comments

[itweresport]

Abigail had, for the past two days, been the picture of a doting (if not loving) wife. She had dutifully set to the routine work of bringing him food, "cleaning" his room (of course, cleaning meant ridding it of the unnecessary decor so much as she could before someone put a stop to it), and preparing his clothes.

What she had not done, to her surprise and dismay, was engage him in fulfilling their primary marital duty, and it worried her. So when he broached the subject of having a serious conversation, she nodded in agreement. "Aye, we must."

[theoriginalbamf]

He faltered for a moment, trying to find the proper words, "Abigail, you're a good and Godly woman, and any man would be proud to call you wife. And be married to you in the eyes of Gott."

[itweresport]

Abigail nodded again. "Aye, it is so. I will be a good wife to you." She paused then, waiting to see if he would address the issue, or if she would need to do so.

[theoriginalbamf]

"We...we were not properly married, Abigail. Those parsons weren't godly men. They weren't Christian men. Those winged children used spells, hexes, to work magic on us. To make us do what we would not." He sighed and set his basket down, "I know marriage is ...everything to you. But, I am not worthy to be your husband."

[itweresport]

She eyed him thoughtfully for a moment. She wasn't a particularly stupid individual - naive, yes, and behind the times, but not stupid - and she began to suspect what he was trying to say. She further suspected that Edward Sexby may have had a hand in influencing him to say it.

"It is true that we were witched, but I did make my vow to you and so I must consider it a sin to turn away. I think you will be a fine husband, if that is truly the matter." She paused. When she spoke again, her tone was harder; it was the carefully threatening tone of an inmate. "Think you to break your vow?"

[theoriginalbamf]

Uh oh.

Kurt was keenly reminded that this was Abigail Williams, of the Salem Witch Trials. "But...it's a sin to live as married when we are not. I'm Catholic, Abby. A Catholic priest."

[itweresport]

"Aye, but we are married. Speak plainly, Kurt," she said harshly. "I like not your implication."

[theoriginalbamf]

Oh, he was so bad at this! It was not going well at all. "I'm trying to speak plainly. I really am. Bitte, look at me." He held out his tri-digit hands, "Do you really want to be married to me? Have children by me? Could you love and nurse a baby born with a tail and glowing eyes?"

[itweresport]

"It matters not what I want. We have made our vows and now we must abide by them, or face the punishment of God."

Her argument was less heartfelt than it might have been. He was perfectly right, of course, that she could love neither him nor any of his spawn. However, she wasn't about to allow him to make a fool of her before the entire Barge. Any righteous anger she felt was directed more at the notion that he had allowed her to insinuate herself into his life under the assumption that their marriage was legitimate long enough to cause gossip.

[theoriginalbamf]

"Of course it matters!" Kurt's tail whipped about in frustration. "Did you know that I was cast aside at birth and raised by a Gypsy witch? My mother was chased from her house when I was minutes old, as the midwives screamed that a devil had been born. She threw me into a river to save herself. My mother was a Baroness but lost everything because of what she gave birth to. Abigail, do you really think that THIS is what God wants for you?"

[itweresport]

"I think it is not God who would make me a liar, but you," she replied coldly. "You are a priest by your own word. Will you turn me out and make of me a whore?"

She held up an emphatic finger and took a step closer to him, speaking angrily now. "They will talk, you know. Aye, they will say that I have lain with you before you did turn away from me. I marvel that you did allow me to share your home and bed for two day and with not one word against it. Is this Edward Sexby's work?"

[theoriginalbamf]

Kurt gaped at her. "You can't be serious. We never ...I let you stay in my room but I was in the pub all night. I wouldn't have...I..." His jaw worked but he'd run out of words besides astonished protests. "No one thinks that we...laid together."

This was a disaster.

"Herr Sexby? I don't understand." He didn't by that point. "All right. Let's just calm down. Getting angry will solve nothing."

[itweresport]

"What would you think," she asked, "if a man and woman did stay together, alone with none but one another, in a single room? You need not answer! I know it would speak of impropriety and scandal, were they unmarried."

"I marvel that you may turn me away now, instead of the moment I stood upon the threshold!"

[theoriginalbamf]

He opened his mouth to answer and then snapped his mouth shut. There as no point arguing the first point. Different times, different culture. "I didn't know what to do. I didn't know what to say. I needed to think, to ask advice-" Ach! Not good. He spoke quickly, "I've never been in a situation like this. And I was cowardly, it's true, and I'm sorry." He gripped his head, "Gott, this is so very confusing."

[itweresport]

"'Ask advice?'" she repeated sharply, latching on to that one phrase amongst all the others, her eyes wide with shock. She was determined to be angry about this: if he wouldn't keep his vow, she wouldn't ease his conscience about it. "You spoke with others to know how best to turn your wife out?"

In a fit of melodrama, she tugged the ring off her finger and chucked it at him. Without waiting to see if it had hit home, she was already reaching for one of the rocks at their feet. "You are a devil, aye!"

In hindsight, a Mediterranean beach wasn't nearly so romantic as it was dangerous for men wishing to loose themselves from unwanted wives.

[theoriginalbamf]

"Nein! Not like that but-" He should really stop talking. Every word he uttered made her angrier. The hurled ring struck his leg. He stooped to pick it up. A devil. "More than you know, Abby...more than you know." Kurt whispered to himself, not seeing that his not-quite-a-wife had picked up a rock.