(Untitled)

[stillnot_ginger]

WHO: Tenth Doctor & Rose Tyler
WHERE: The TARDIS in the Ten's Cabin
WHEN: mid-afternoon
WHAT: To apologise without apologising. That is the question.
WARNINGS: TBA

Comments

[stillnot_ginger]

There was no reason he was holding the mallet, outside of the fact it was there and he wanted something to do with his hands. Something in his hands usually kept the Doctor from fidgeting as much and kept his easily distracted mind focused on at least one thing at a time.

The Doctor smiled, feeling the TARDIS's excitement that Rose was back. He was, however, able to hide his own excitement better -- even if it was tinged with a fair amount of apprehensions as well. The Doctor loved this, loved watching Rose and knowing the respect for the TARDIS she had. That she understood what he meant by an innocuous 'she missed you', though that could have been due to the whole 'looking into the heart of the TARDIS business'.

Suddenly her arms were around him and the Doctor was assaulted with that too-familiar scent of Rose Tyler. His hearts skipped a beat and without thinking, he slid his arms around her to hold her close. "I've missed you too," he murmured into her hair, hoping his words were quiet enough that she didn't hear them. Finally, he pulled back, placing one hand on the side of her face, silently entreating her to talk; to explain what had happened.

[sheisreturning]

When he didn't push her away like she had been fearing for days if this moment ever presented itself she felt relieved. Hearing that he had actually missed her made it even more sweet and calmed her fears a bit for now that things would just go so horrid. She was starting to feel a bit of hope suddenly.

But then she felt him pull back and knew what she had owed him some sort of explanation. She could read it so easily in his eyes. "I know," she started glancing down for a second and then looking back at him tilting her head further against his hand.

She had gone over what she'd actually say to him about a dozen times in her cabin ever since she had found out. She had practiced in front of a mirror reminding herself each time not to break, crack. She had to be firm no matter what. But just looking at him now all those words, those practiced lines seemed to have faded away.

Bringing her hand up she rested it on top of his own and knew that she had to say something. "It wasn't me, Doctor. I'd never hurt you like that. I've talked with Martha and Ace." she explained not really all too fond of the latter companion. "They told me and...it has to be some parallel version." It was the only reasonable explanation that had made sense in her mind.

"Remember the dog?" she added. "A human version isn't so far fetched, yeah?" Though really she'd thought if she ever did meet a second version of her it'd be amusing. Not that she ever would meet her now but she was dealing with the left over mess. Hoping that he'd at least see reason and fearing once again that he'd push her away.

[stillnot_ginger]

To say he didn't miss her would have been a bold-faced lie. The Doctor missed her -- even before he found that he could admit his feelings, the Doctor missed the blonde when she wasn't around. Somehow she had wormed her way under his skin, even when he was determined to remain the lonely angel for the duration of his long existence.

The Doctor needed this explanation, to know what had happened and why one of the Roses had desired to hurt him in such a manner. Yes, the Doctor knew something was amiss when she did take up with the Frenchman. He knew Rose to be a faithful companion... but still, if she would be happier elsewhere he would never force her into anything against her will.

Her touch was light against the back of his hand and the Doctor grew still, chest barely rising as he breathed in. "I had a feeling you've talked to Martha. She said something to me as well." The number of people who were trying to play 'matchmaker' with him ... the Doctor wasn't sure if he should be glad or frightened.

The Doctor chuckled softly. "Ah yes, Rose the lap dog," he said, smiling at the memory. The smile then faded from the Doctor's face as he let his hand fall away to rest in his lap. "I've always said, Rose -- tell me if you'd rather be elsewhere. I've never wanted to keep you here against your will or if your affections have changed." He paused. "Though, if you're going to Ricky, we may have a bit of a problem."

[sheisreturning]

A small frown graced her face when she felt his hand fall away. There could never really be anyone else for her. She was so sure of it. Being stuck in that parallel world the only thing that she could think of was getting back to him even if it would’ve taken her twenty years of her life or more. For her, he was worth it and so much more even if he could never really return her feelings. Though from the little that she had heard it seemed that he had did.

Hearing that Martha had talked to him as well surprised her just a tad as she tilted her head slightly. Even though she had suggested it to the woman she hadn't really expected her to go through with it. "Did she? She's rather brilliant you know."

She mustered up a small smile at the mention of ‘Rickey’, "Mickey," she corrected thinking back to him. He was better off in that parallel world with his grandmother. She never really could look at him the same way again after she had met the Doctor and once she found herself trapped in that other universe they had decided on staying on just being mates since he knew that no one else could really capture Rose’s attention like the Doctor had.

Time and time again he’d suggest that she’d move on, go out with a bloke from work. After all what harm could it do? She needed to be more social with her life, but Rose would always make some excuse about work or having to deal with her mum and baby brother. She didn’t want anyone else. There could never be anyone else.

"And he’s moved on. Besides..." Her voice trailed off for a moment as she glanced down at his hand resting on his lap. She reached down lacing her slender fingers against his own in an attempt to make him understand though really she had missed the contact. “There was never really anyone else for me there. I told you a long time ago that I’d never leave you. And that’s not gonna change. What I feel...I...I...” Could she even say those words again? Words that she had said out of desperation that cold windy day on that awful beach.

She couldn’t as she just looked at him with rather sad eyes and then taking on step back. "And I know that you’re hurt and confused." Because really that’s what she had been feeling ever since hearing about what had happened. She didn’t blame him one bit. "And if you don’t want me anymore even though that wasn’t me then I...I understand." It was his choice in the end.

[stillnot_ginger]

Until he knew for certain that she wanted this and him, the Doctor wasn't going to force the issue. He wasn't going to assume anything, wasn't going to hold out hope until he knew one hundred percent for certain that she still wanted him. Rose wasn't the only one who had done all she could to get back to him. The Doctor, going against everything he knew, had tried -- even though he knew the walls between the two words had been sealed shut.

The Doctor nodded. "Yes, she did." He shook his head, rubbing the back of his neck. "Of course she's brilliant. Never would have taken her on if she wasn't completely brilliant." Like you. "Seemed to think I might have my mind made up and not apt to listen. No idea where she'd get that one from."

Other than the fact that the Doctor could be fairly stubborn when he wanted to be. Or was stubborn all of the time, take your pick.

"Mickey, Rickey. Potato. Potatoe." The Doctor shrugged, a hint of an impish smile gracing his face. He did like the bloke sure enough, though he didn't think the nickname of 'the idiot' was that much of a stretch either. But with things as tenuous as they were between them, he wisely refrained from anymore sleights intended for M/Rickey's ears.

She had about as much trouble saying the words as he did. Over the past few months, they had become easier, but then everything changed, hadn't it? The Doctor was coming to realise that it wasn't Rose's fault but a series of unfortunate circumstances.

Rose slid her hand into his and even as she took a step back, his eyes stayed fixed on their interlocked hands. All he did was nod, agreeing that yes, he had been hurt by this. That the woman he'd finally chosen to love had decided to turn on him and betray him with another. "It truly wasn't you?" the Doctor asked softly, not lifting his gaze to meet hers. "You're not just telling me this realising whatever you did about Armand. Because I can't keep going back and forth like this, Rose. Far be it for me to give you an ultimatum but at the same time..." At last, he lifted his head. "It's your choice as much as it's mine, Rose. If not moreso."

[sheisreturning]

Rose shot the Doctor a certain look knowing how stubborn he could get and very thankful that Martha had actually spoken to him. "Oh no idea at all." She remarked with a bit of a smile. "Wonder what kind of trouble the both of you got into." But that was something that Rose had intended on finding out for herself from Martha since she knew exactly how the Doctor could be at times.

"He’d take offense to that you know. But don’t worry, I won’t tell him," she teased knowing that if Mickey were there right now he’d be rolling his eyes and probably be owing her a fiver over there little bet.

And still when he didn’t meet her eyes the smile faded once again. "It wasn’t," she said softly hoping that he’d believe her as she gave his hand a squeeze. "I’d never hurt you like that Doctor. I don’t even know the full story with Armand." And honestly maybe it was better that she didn’t since every time she even tried to think of it, it made her stomach crawl. She hadn’t even made contact with the Frenchman since finding out not wanting to make things difficult for him. "But what I do know is that I..." Her voice faltered once again as she drew in a breath knowing that she just had to say it one last time. That’s when she met his gaze and her breath hitched in her throat for a moment. "I love you. And the last thing I ever want to do is hurt you or see you hurt." There was so much sincerity behind her gaze now.

[stillnot_ginger]

Martha may have spoken him, but the Doctor didn't immediately believe her either. How was that for stubborn: the Doctor didn't trust the words of his former companion until he could see Rose himself. All Martha had done was open the door to get the Doctor to see Rose -- but not the level of 'belief'. The Doctor attempted to pull an innocent face, eyes asking 'moi? trouble?'. "Well, we may have met Shakespeare, but you got to meet Dickens." The Doctor scratched his chin thoughtfully. "Don't know who wins on that one."

Not that the Doctor really wanted go through yet another companion vs companion issue. The near fight between Sarah Jane and Rose had been enough for him.

The Doctor simply shrugged, letting the the subject of Rickey drop. That was the last thing he needed: to keep going back and forth with Rickey. Yes, the Doctor was jealous thank you very much -- though would he ever admit it? Hardly.

"I only know what you... what she said," The Doctor said softly, staring off into space. He knew just how raw his emotions were, things he always kept hidden had now been rubbed raw; yes, by his own accord, but he always wasn't sure the best way to deal with things. "That he had needed comfort and yo--she provided it. In every manner of the word." The Doctor's eyes flicked up at her admission and he drew in a deep breath. It had taken him so long to be able to return the words, and then had felt as if his admission had been thrown back in his face. It would take him time to say it again.

"I know," he said softly, finally raising his gaze to hers once more. He tugged her forward by the hand, until she was standing closer. The Doctor's free hand came to rest on Rose's hip, letting his actions speak louder than words. "Is this what you truly want? I'm willing to give this a second chance --" he flashed a grin suddenly. "Apparently I am a man who gives second chances who knew!?" After all that talk that he didn't give second chances too. How funny. "Right. As I was saying. Second chances. I do want this and you, Rose. But I want you to be certain... and if you decide later that you can't, tell me rather than finding some... shall we say... former Time Agent and breaking it off that way.".

Sorry Jack, but you were going to be the butt end of a joke

[sheisreturning]

"Shakespeare, really?" she retorted looking both surprised and amazed. A part of her was just that bit jealous that Martha had gotten to meet Shakespeare. Not that Rose was a big fan in any way but she had been forced to read one of his plays back in school just before she had decided to drop. Though she wouldn’t admit it now, maybe Martha had won that one. Charles Dickens was one thing but Shakespeare was on a whole other level. "Lucky her." Not only because of the meeting but because she had actually gotten to be with him. She couldn’t even begin to imagine how he had been after the world they had both known had been slipped up from under them. For ever. Only not forever since now she was standing right in front of him again, like it always was before.

The expression on her face fell a little more at the explanation. It had been clear to her what the other version of her had done from the information gathered from the two former companions but hearing it from his lips seemed to make it all the more real. It made her wish for a time machine of her own to go back and fix things, maybe even slap some sense into that parallel version of herself. But that was only what wasn’t possible and now she was here with him more than willing to fix the damage that other version of her had caused him. "Oh," she said almost with a quite tone to her voice. She just couldn’t see herself comforting another man like that when she had her Doctor around even if he did run off from time to time but that’s just how he was and she had come to accept that long ago. She didn’t know what more she could say to that. To something that she didn’t do and yet was left with the broken pieces to mend together.

When she saw that he was meeting her gaze she swallowed hard feeling his hand at her hip and reminding herself that things would be fine. To hear that he was more than willing to give this a second go caused her heart to flutter just a bit as she nodded. More than anything she wanted this, him and was intending on proving it. "Doctor," she began her hand going towards his silk tie to fiddling with it. Oh how she had longed to do this. "I’m more than sure. And Jack really?" She was a bit amused at the notion.

She did love Jack, yes but not the same way she loved him or would ever love anyone else. "I don’t think you have to worry about it too much. I do love Jack but he’s you know." Probably one of her best mates aboard. And yes there was flirting but it was all in fun. "I’m wise to most of his tricks." she said attempting to sound a bit confident flashing him a small grin. Her hand started to tug more at his tie almost reeling him closer. "I think even if you had some sort of parallel twin running around here, you still wouldn’t have to worry cause I only love you. And have always loved you." She didn’t know the future nor did she really care to at this moment. There was just him and her in the TARDIS as it should be and would always be as far as she was concerned. And before he could even utter a single word to that, Rose gave his tie another rough tug to claim his lips with her own in a soft kiss.

[Iiiiii hate school. *snugs* and I'm glad you're willing to put up with me!]

[stillnot_ginger]

"Really," the Doctor said with a grin. "Would I ever lie to you?" He pursed his lips and quickly held up a hand. "On second thought, no, don't answer that and I don't think I want to know. Or, maybe I do but I'm better off not knowing. No matter what... just don't tell me. And I'll live. Or something." His mouth ran at the speed of light, a nervous habit he'd acquired somewhere along the line and had yet to get rid of. It was the manic side coming out and, apparently, Rose was set to be the recipient of it. "Ooooh, I don't know if it was lucky or not," he drawled. "Kept trying to use my phrases. 'Course, I could have been using his first and giving him ideas, but who's really counting?"

The expression on Rose's face nearly killed the Doctor. He could feel his stomach lurch, knowing he was the cause of that expression. But at the same time, Rose needed to know what had happened with this other self. She had a right to know what he had gone through and what he had believed to be true. The Doctor hadn't wanted to break her apart like this, but he also knew she had to know. If they were going to continue on, there couldn't be this dark cloud hanging between them.

His eyes followed her hands as she played with his tie. Such an innocuous gesture but at the same time felt so intimate. Not to mention -- it felt so right. "Yes, Jack, really. I know how tempting the man can be." The Doctor remembered that kiss. Not that he'd act on it, but he remembered it. And he always had a sinking suspicion that Rose had been fairly enamoured with the Time Agent, but he'd keep that little bit to himself. She still could have been, for that matter -- again with the things the Doctor really didn't want to know.

"You're wise to most of his tricks," The Doctor pointed out, though there was a smile on his face. He began to move closer as she tugged, feeling that all-too welcome pitter-patter of his hearts as their beats raced faster. He may not be able to return the words yet -- he would, just not now -- but he could kiss her.

The Doctor's hands slid up from Rose's hips to rest on her cheeks, thumbs rubbing along her cheekbones. He let the kiss continue as it was, slow and sweet before gently trying to deepen it. The Doctor knew he couldn't say the words in return but that didn't preclude him from showing how he felt in other ways. Actions always spoke louder than words and, hopefully, the Doctor was saying a mouthfull right now.

[Aw. *snuggles* No worries dearie. Kick school's ass! Sorry for my lag. Work was kicking mine.]

[sheisreturning]

For certain she’d though he’d push her away and tell her that he couldn’t. That he didn’t. That he was still hurting. That was what her mind had screamed at her before she had even decided to kiss him. And she knew that he had to be inside. While not really knowing all the details, she knew that in time maybe he’d tell her and she’d listen and comfort him as best as she could. It was what she did after all. If she could mend those broken pieces back together then she would in an instant though she knew it was a process.

But the matter of the fact was, he hadn’t pulled away, wasn’t doing what her mind had told her he’d do and that had just managed to surprise the blonde. There was so much that could be read by his simple actions as the kissed deepened. And maybe for once words wouldn’t be needed.
Her hand loosened the knot on his tie, completely losing herself in the heated kiss while her other hand rested against his right heart hearing its rapid beat through the fabric. Her own heart was in a race of its very own as her tongue slipped inside his mouth really tasting him. It was a curiosity that she had always wondered about if she had ever gotten to kiss him. And she found it to be addicting as she closed her eyes for a moment.

She was just dreaming again. Clearly she had to be. When her eyes opened again, he’d probably be gone and she’d probably be back in her room on that parallel world. The need to breath struck her foggy mind and reluctantly she pulled away full expecting for this dream to just fade. But as she opened her dark brown eyes to stare at him with an almost rather dazed expression and flushed cheeks, there he was still. A fact. A reality.

"...Doctor," she managed to say in a soft tone feeling her knees still a bit weakened by his kiss as her brain scrambled for some sort of sense, words. "I...You’re full of surprises you know."