Inheritance Is A Funny Thing
title: Inheritance Is A Funny Thing
summary: A look at the first prank pulled by wee Fred and George.
characters/pairings: The Weasley Twins, Bill, Charlie, Percy, Ron, Harry, Molly, Arthur, Gideon Prewett and Fabian Prewett; blink-and-you-missed-it reference to the Marauders.
genre: Humor
ratings/warnings: PG
Word Count: 1269
a/n: Written for butterfly269200. I obviously did NOT follow the drabble length.
It was the afternoon of the Quidditch World Cup Final and spirits were high. Harry's head is swimming with all the chants he learnt for the Irish side and he is about to have a chant-off with Ron, Ireland vs. Bulgaria when Percy storms into the tent, hair bright green.
"This is NOT Ministry appropriate!" Percy insists, pointing at his bright coloured hair.
"It's Irish Green!"
"Oh Percy Boy-"
"-The pipes-"
"-the pipes-"
"They are not calling." Percy replies with irritation.
Bill lazily waves his wand at Percy's hair. "Oi you two, you've always been pranking Percy, isn't that right, Charlie?"
Charlie snorts into his drink, "Only because they're smart enough not to prank us."
"You," Fred points at Bill, "are a curse-breaker."
George puts his arm around Charlie, "And you could've played for England, but instead you chase dragons. Do you see, brother? We find ourselves slightly outdone."
"For now."
"But Harry, you should know that they've alwayspicked on Percy." Bill adds, pulling Fred into a very tight headlock. "First prank they ever pulled was on Percy."
Ron tuts in disbelief, "No it's not! They turned my stuffed bear into a spider! That was it."
Charlie snickers, "That was the first prank they pulled on you, Ron. But their first prank in their long convoluted history of pranks-"
"Thank you for that introduction, Charlie-"
"-not a touch overdramatized, don't you think, George?"
"As I was saying," Charlie glares at his younger brothers, "their first prank ever was on Percy. Though they did have some help."
"Did we?" Fred asks. "I don't remember this prank-"
"-But it is Percy, we must've pulled hundreds by now." George replies thoughtfully.
---
"Ah, Molly, this one looks like Arthur." Gideon mused, poking at the little bundle known as Ronald Bilius Weasley. "Couldn't bear to name one of your sons after me?"
"Or me?"
"But mostly me."
"For the love of god, you tits." Molly snapped. "I wasn't going to name any of my children after you for fear that they'd have the unfortunate luck of being exact replicas of you-"
"Except in miniature." Fabian grinned. "You did have the opportunity when Fred and George were born, you know."
"Perfect little clones ready to do our bidding." Gideon laughed, "Isn't that right, little Ronald?" The bundle in his arms started to cry.
Fabian sighed. "Oh beautiful, now look what you've done. You've scared the poor child with your-"
"Dare you say my ugly face, brother?" Fabian only glared at Gideon as he handed Ron back to Molly. "Suppose we should go and help Arthur, then, yeah? I don't think he's faring too well with four boys."
Molly, exasperation weighing heavily in her voice, called out to her brothers' retreating backs, "Please help him and don't add to the madness Gideon-"
"Ha, she just mentioned-"
"And you too, Fabian."
"Bugger."
The Prewetts are hardly a step out of the door when Bill handed Gideon a disgruntled looking Fred Weasley. "Dad's forcibly separated him from George because they started chucking satsumas at Errol. Could you watch this one, Uncle Gideon while Charlie and I try to clean George?" He didn't wait for them to answer and scampered back into the kitchen where Charlie was hopefully keeping George at bay.
"Charlie, Bill, George and Fred. That's... who's missing?" Fabian asked as the two made their way into the sitting room to see an exhausted Arthur sitting on the sofa. "Oh there's Arthur and Percy."
"You should wear shirts with your names on it. You're like a proper Quidditch team when you do that. Is that your strategy, Arthur? Start up a new club?" Gideon joked.
"Ha ha, Gideon." Arthur replied with a weak smile. "I think I'm supposed to start dinner for this lot too. Heaven help us."
"Get Fabian in the kitchen, he's a regular gourmet, that one." Gideon suggested. "Or how about you let us handle Fred and George, we'll take them out for a walk-"
"-make sure their water dishes are always full-"
"-though picking up their poo might be a stretch-"
"They're not dogs." Arthur laughed. "But that's a fair trade. They're a handful. You two are a handful, I think you'd get along swimmingly."
---
"Tell us something we don't already know." Fred says impatiently. "We know Uncle Gideon and Fabian were most likely the best pranksters to ever prank pranks-"
"Well there's those Marauders." George says so only Harry and Ron can hear. "But yeah, don't bore the boys, Billiam."
"Clever, George." Bill rolls his eyes.
"Thank you. I'm a right old Ravenclaw." George grins. "Carry on."
--
"All right, ready, Fred?" Gideon asked, looking at his nephew. "You Fabian, ready with George, then?"
"Systems are go." Fabian snickered. "Molly will flay us for this."
"Yes but, it's so easy." Gideon replied. "And we did this to our weird cousin what's his face when we were their age."
Exactly what they were doing was this: Gideon placed a dollop of whipped cream on both of, the now napping, Percy's hands. Fabian bestowed upon his nephews a feather. Each brother then had the job of helping the nearly two year old twins.
Fred was eager to play and with Gideon's help leaned forward, letting the tiniest brush of the feather hit Percy's nose. Percy brushed it away with one hand getting whipped cream onto his nose. George followed suit and soon enough, both sets of twins were laughing hysterically. Fred and George at their own antics and Gideon and Fabian at their nephews.
"Merlin's beard, will you two ever grow up?"
Gideon looked at Fabian quickly before putting a sweet smile on for Molly. "Sister! We were just entertaining your sons. See how happy and content and poo free they are?"
"Well... Percy isn't that clean, but, everybody's, er, relatively happy."
"Oh come on, don't look so upset, Molly. We're just breaking them into the longstanding Prewett tradition of pranking." Gideon grinned.
Molly shook her head, though a grin was tugging at the corners of her lips. "Right, right. It would be unfortunate to let that gene go to waste, wouldn't it?"
Fabian looked at Molly aghast, "Hark, what was that dear sister?"
"Are you actually suggesting that you're not mad at us?"
"Of course I'm mad at you, but I'm not stupid enough to yell at you." Molly replied, surveying the five boys in front of her. "Besides, the twins will probably want to have good memories of their first prank."
"This moment needs to be photographed!"
"Immortalized in granite sculpture!"
"Oh, I'm sure you lot will make sure they remember." Molly replied with a laugh. "Now, if you would go downstairs, behave, not turn the living room into a pigsty, again, I'll clean Percy up."
Fabian waited until Molly left with Percy to ask his nephews, "Now, who wants to do the same think to your Dad?"
--
"So did we inherit anything else from the illustrious Gideon and Fabian Prewett?" George asks Bill and Charlie.
"You know, aside from inherently everything-"
"-Good looks"
"-Charm-"
"-especially with the ladies." George finishes. He looks at Harry and says matter-of-factly, "Don't let your best mate Ron be your judge of luck with the ladies, Harry. Gideon and Fabian were experts at picking girls up."
Bill, who hasn't let Fred out of the headlock just yet, snorts. "No, pranking is pretty much all you've inherited."
"Ah well," George shrugs, "that's good enough, then."
summary: A look at the first prank pulled by wee Fred and George.
characters/pairings: The Weasley Twins, Bill, Charlie, Percy, Ron, Harry, Molly, Arthur, Gideon Prewett and Fabian Prewett; blink-and-you-missed-it reference to the Marauders.
genre: Humor
ratings/warnings: PG
Word Count: 1269
a/n: Written for butterfly269200. I obviously did NOT follow the drabble length.
It was the afternoon of the Quidditch World Cup Final and spirits were high. Harry's head is swimming with all the chants he learnt for the Irish side and he is about to have a chant-off with Ron, Ireland vs. Bulgaria when Percy storms into the tent, hair bright green.
"This is NOT Ministry appropriate!" Percy insists, pointing at his bright coloured hair.
"It's Irish Green!"
"Oh Percy Boy-"
"-The pipes-"
"-the pipes-"
"They are not calling." Percy replies with irritation.
Bill lazily waves his wand at Percy's hair. "Oi you two, you've always been pranking Percy, isn't that right, Charlie?"
Charlie snorts into his drink, "Only because they're smart enough not to prank us."
"You," Fred points at Bill, "are a curse-breaker."
George puts his arm around Charlie, "And you could've played for England, but instead you chase dragons. Do you see, brother? We find ourselves slightly outdone."
"For now."
"But Harry, you should know that they've alwayspicked on Percy." Bill adds, pulling Fred into a very tight headlock. "First prank they ever pulled was on Percy."
Ron tuts in disbelief, "No it's not! They turned my stuffed bear into a spider! That was it."
Charlie snickers, "That was the first prank they pulled on you, Ron. But their first prank in their long convoluted history of pranks-"
"Thank you for that introduction, Charlie-"
"-not a touch overdramatized, don't you think, George?"
"As I was saying," Charlie glares at his younger brothers, "their first prank ever was on Percy. Though they did have some help."
"Did we?" Fred asks. "I don't remember this prank-"
"-But it is Percy, we must've pulled hundreds by now." George replies thoughtfully.
---
"Ah, Molly, this one looks like Arthur." Gideon mused, poking at the little bundle known as Ronald Bilius Weasley. "Couldn't bear to name one of your sons after me?"
"Or me?"
"But mostly me."
"For the love of god, you tits." Molly snapped. "I wasn't going to name any of my children after you for fear that they'd have the unfortunate luck of being exact replicas of you-"
"Except in miniature." Fabian grinned. "You did have the opportunity when Fred and George were born, you know."
"Perfect little clones ready to do our bidding." Gideon laughed, "Isn't that right, little Ronald?" The bundle in his arms started to cry.
Fabian sighed. "Oh beautiful, now look what you've done. You've scared the poor child with your-"
"Dare you say my ugly face, brother?" Fabian only glared at Gideon as he handed Ron back to Molly. "Suppose we should go and help Arthur, then, yeah? I don't think he's faring too well with four boys."
Molly, exasperation weighing heavily in her voice, called out to her brothers' retreating backs, "Please help him and don't add to the madness Gideon-"
"Ha, she just mentioned-"
"And you too, Fabian."
"Bugger."
The Prewetts are hardly a step out of the door when Bill handed Gideon a disgruntled looking Fred Weasley. "Dad's forcibly separated him from George because they started chucking satsumas at Errol. Could you watch this one, Uncle Gideon while Charlie and I try to clean George?" He didn't wait for them to answer and scampered back into the kitchen where Charlie was hopefully keeping George at bay.
"Charlie, Bill, George and Fred. That's... who's missing?" Fabian asked as the two made their way into the sitting room to see an exhausted Arthur sitting on the sofa. "Oh there's Arthur and Percy."
"You should wear shirts with your names on it. You're like a proper Quidditch team when you do that. Is that your strategy, Arthur? Start up a new club?" Gideon joked.
"Ha ha, Gideon." Arthur replied with a weak smile. "I think I'm supposed to start dinner for this lot too. Heaven help us."
"Get Fabian in the kitchen, he's a regular gourmet, that one." Gideon suggested. "Or how about you let us handle Fred and George, we'll take them out for a walk-"
"-make sure their water dishes are always full-"
"-though picking up their poo might be a stretch-"
"They're not dogs." Arthur laughed. "But that's a fair trade. They're a handful. You two are a handful, I think you'd get along swimmingly."
---
"Tell us something we don't already know." Fred says impatiently. "We know Uncle Gideon and Fabian were most likely the best pranksters to ever prank pranks-"
"Well there's those Marauders." George says so only Harry and Ron can hear. "But yeah, don't bore the boys, Billiam."
"Clever, George." Bill rolls his eyes.
"Thank you. I'm a right old Ravenclaw." George grins. "Carry on."
--
"All right, ready, Fred?" Gideon asked, looking at his nephew. "You Fabian, ready with George, then?"
"Systems are go." Fabian snickered. "Molly will flay us for this."
"Yes but, it's so easy." Gideon replied. "And we did this to our weird cousin what's his face when we were their age."
Exactly what they were doing was this: Gideon placed a dollop of whipped cream on both of, the now napping, Percy's hands. Fabian bestowed upon his nephews a feather. Each brother then had the job of helping the nearly two year old twins.
Fred was eager to play and with Gideon's help leaned forward, letting the tiniest brush of the feather hit Percy's nose. Percy brushed it away with one hand getting whipped cream onto his nose. George followed suit and soon enough, both sets of twins were laughing hysterically. Fred and George at their own antics and Gideon and Fabian at their nephews.
"Merlin's beard, will you two ever grow up?"
Gideon looked at Fabian quickly before putting a sweet smile on for Molly. "Sister! We were just entertaining your sons. See how happy and content and poo free they are?"
"Well... Percy isn't that clean, but, everybody's, er, relatively happy."
"Oh come on, don't look so upset, Molly. We're just breaking them into the longstanding Prewett tradition of pranking." Gideon grinned.
Molly shook her head, though a grin was tugging at the corners of her lips. "Right, right. It would be unfortunate to let that gene go to waste, wouldn't it?"
Fabian looked at Molly aghast, "Hark, what was that dear sister?"
"Are you actually suggesting that you're not mad at us?"
"Of course I'm mad at you, but I'm not stupid enough to yell at you." Molly replied, surveying the five boys in front of her. "Besides, the twins will probably want to have good memories of their first prank."
"This moment needs to be photographed!"
"Immortalized in granite sculpture!"
"Oh, I'm sure you lot will make sure they remember." Molly replied with a laugh. "Now, if you would go downstairs, behave, not turn the living room into a pigsty, again, I'll clean Percy up."
Fabian waited until Molly left with Percy to ask his nephews, "Now, who wants to do the same think to your Dad?"
--
"So did we inherit anything else from the illustrious Gideon and Fabian Prewett?" George asks Bill and Charlie.
"You know, aside from inherently everything-"
"-Good looks"
"-Charm-"
"-especially with the ladies." George finishes. He looks at Harry and says matter-of-factly, "Don't let your best mate Ron be your judge of luck with the ladies, Harry. Gideon and Fabian were experts at picking girls up."
Bill, who hasn't let Fred out of the headlock just yet, snorts. "No, pranking is pretty much all you've inherited."
"Ah well," George shrugs, "that's good enough, then."