(no subject)
so I have winter break this weekend... i'll be home friday-tuesday, so if anyone will be around or wants me to come visit feel free to let me know.... I won't have much going on due to recent events...
Now I remember why I only stay in relationships for no more than 2 months... it just sucks when they end. and I know that I'll find someone great eventually and blah blah blah but right now my irrational fear that won't leave me alone is that I'll end up like my aunt, who is the joke of the family b/c she has a master's degree, is working at a job that I am probably qualified for at 19 years old, and everytime she starts dating someone promising she drives them away.
I'm okay with being single. I just hate being lonely. and being single doesnt equate with being lonely necessarily, but unless I'm hanging out with my friends alot or going out on dates, single = lonely. and I know I should be focusing on school and whatnot, but I think I do a pretty good job of that anyway. I've avoided dating people at Hope for that very reason...
I just can't wait for summer... then I'll be too busy with work and school to care. of course, I'll probably be bummed b/c I won't see my friends at all either (like last summer) but at least then it's self-inflicted loneliness.
One thing is for sure... maybe having my friends set me up with guys that they think will be good for me isn't the best plan.
this isnt the most optimistic entry.. sorry guys.
Now I remember why I only stay in relationships for no more than 2 months... it just sucks when they end. and I know that I'll find someone great eventually and blah blah blah but right now my irrational fear that won't leave me alone is that I'll end up like my aunt, who is the joke of the family b/c she has a master's degree, is working at a job that I am probably qualified for at 19 years old, and everytime she starts dating someone promising she drives them away.
I'm okay with being single. I just hate being lonely. and being single doesnt equate with being lonely necessarily, but unless I'm hanging out with my friends alot or going out on dates, single = lonely. and I know I should be focusing on school and whatnot, but I think I do a pretty good job of that anyway. I've avoided dating people at Hope for that very reason...
I just can't wait for summer... then I'll be too busy with work and school to care. of course, I'll probably be bummed b/c I won't see my friends at all either (like last summer) but at least then it's self-inflicted loneliness.
One thing is for sure... maybe having my friends set me up with guys that they think will be good for me isn't the best plan.
this isnt the most optimistic entry.. sorry guys.