in new york i lost it all
Coming to New York was a decision I didn't put much thought into. It came up in conversation one day with a boy I hadn't spoken to in a long time. Talking to him, it almost felt as if the long gap of silence between us didn't exist. Almost.
I didn't think things would instantly go back to good between us, I don't know if that can ever happen. But I was encouraged that things were good. Good enough for me to rearrange my schedule and come to New York at the earliest date I could. For some that might not seem like a big deal but for me, it is. I'm the kind of girl that always thinks everything through three times. I like to plan ahead and never jump into something headfirst without considering all possible outlooks.
This time, I was so happy to be talking to him again and optimistic that things would be okay between us that I made a very quick decision without really considering what it would be like once I arrived in New York. I wasn't expecting a happy ending. I wasn't expecting a big, overly excited welcoming party. But I also wasn't expecting to spend most of my time alone, staring at my phone willing it to ring.
I didn't think things would instantly go back to good between us, I don't know if that can ever happen. But I was encouraged that things were good. Good enough for me to rearrange my schedule and come to New York at the earliest date I could. For some that might not seem like a big deal but for me, it is. I'm the kind of girl that always thinks everything through three times. I like to plan ahead and never jump into something headfirst without considering all possible outlooks.
This time, I was so happy to be talking to him again and optimistic that things would be okay between us that I made a very quick decision without really considering what it would be like once I arrived in New York. I wasn't expecting a happy ending. I wasn't expecting a big, overly excited welcoming party. But I also wasn't expecting to spend most of my time alone, staring at my phone willing it to ring.