Looking for the eyeless lady
You close your eyes, you focus, you let them take you, and you're there. It's cold, it's ethereal, it's a lot like drowning. No air, no sound. She taught me how to go there, she taught me how do so much of what I know, she's my friend, right?
She's my friend, and I don't know if she's left of her own volition, or if she's in danger now.
But she's my friend, so I have to go looking.
Firegaze said, be careful if Maedryn talks to you, because it's not the Maedryn you know. All she could say when I asked why was that she just knew. For some reason I believed her.
So I must be crazy already.
Maybe that was what she was talking about. I thought that place was deserted.
I say that place like it's somewhere else. I don't know what it is.
So I do like Maedryn taught me. I find a dark place, I close my eyes, I focus on fear, the shadows, and the urge to disappear into them, into safety, out of sight, out of mind, the desire to be gone. And I open them, and I'm there.
At least, I think I am.
Maybe I'm only able to do this because of her. Or maybe I'm losing it.
I shut them again, and, like she taught me, I fight back the fear. I remind myself there is no need to breathe here, because here I am already dead. And I focus on her. The clammy skin, the straw-like hair, the bare jaw, those empty eyes. I focus on it, and when I open my eyes, I'm
I don't even know where
There was an altar, or a tomb. I don't know. Some great slab of stone, crawling with dark, fleeting shadows, in the midst of trees. And she's there, beckoning me over.
I must be crazy, because I believed Firegaze, and I believed that it wasn't her.
And I must be incredibly lucky, because I was right.
I think.
They said she'd told them about me. More of them kept appearing. There was a chorus of voices and none of them would shut up, not even for a second. I addressed them individually, and at first, they appeared as her. They all came towards me, and all were drawn to that slab of stone, and the shadows on it grew. They answered me, but evasively. She'd told them about me, they hadn't met me before, but they knew I'd been here. Warm minds were so rare, they could tell.
I'm living, she shouldn't have brought me here. That's just more proof. She shouldn't be bringing me here.
I'm alive, right?
I call their bluff, and they're not Mae anymore. Eyes in robes. They keep appearing, and the stone grows darker, and they keep offering to bring her to me. And keep trying to get me to come to them.
I think they were bound there. Trying to trick me, trying to take me. They admitted it, themselves. Free me of that fleshy prison or something like that. I must have been crazy to think this place was deserted, but now I have another dilemma. Are they really familiar with her, does she know them, or are they just predators waiting in the dark, tricksters I'm stuck with now?
Vorrick thinks I've lost it. He's acting like I've lost it. I'm scared. If I go there, if I listen, I hear, now. I can't help but wonder if this was her intention. If she wants what they want. I thought she was trying to kill me before. I did. Not out of malice, but because she thinks it's the right thing to do for me.
Fuck. Listen to me.
Yes, I'm scared. I can't sleep. So long with her over my shoulder, the feeling of eyes on the back of my head had become a comforting thing. And now she's gone, but I still feel the eyes, and I'm scared, I can't sleep. I don't want to. I stopped with the potions, for a few days. Everything hurt, I didn't care, I had my wits about me. I thought so. Maybe I was worse without them.
He thinks I'm crazy, but he talked a little sense into me. Or a little nonsense. then he dipped into the dreamfoil, and now I did too and
I think I shouldn't have listened to him but maybe he was right
I should be looking for her right now but for all I know she's watching all of this and it's funny to her Mae where the hell are you this is not funny
She's my friend, and I don't know if she's left of her own volition, or if she's in danger now.
But she's my friend, so I have to go looking.
Firegaze said, be careful if Maedryn talks to you, because it's not the Maedryn you know. All she could say when I asked why was that she just knew. For some reason I believed her.
So I must be crazy already.
Maybe that was what she was talking about. I thought that place was deserted.
I say that place like it's somewhere else. I don't know what it is.
So I do like Maedryn taught me. I find a dark place, I close my eyes, I focus on fear, the shadows, and the urge to disappear into them, into safety, out of sight, out of mind, the desire to be gone. And I open them, and I'm there.
At least, I think I am.
Maybe I'm only able to do this because of her. Or maybe I'm losing it.
I shut them again, and, like she taught me, I fight back the fear. I remind myself there is no need to breathe here, because here I am already dead. And I focus on her. The clammy skin, the straw-like hair, the bare jaw, those empty eyes. I focus on it, and when I open my eyes, I'm
I don't even know where
There was an altar, or a tomb. I don't know. Some great slab of stone, crawling with dark, fleeting shadows, in the midst of trees. And she's there, beckoning me over.
I must be crazy, because I believed Firegaze, and I believed that it wasn't her.
And I must be incredibly lucky, because I was right.
I think.
They said she'd told them about me. More of them kept appearing. There was a chorus of voices and none of them would shut up, not even for a second. I addressed them individually, and at first, they appeared as her. They all came towards me, and all were drawn to that slab of stone, and the shadows on it grew. They answered me, but evasively. She'd told them about me, they hadn't met me before, but they knew I'd been here. Warm minds were so rare, they could tell.
I'm living, she shouldn't have brought me here. That's just more proof. She shouldn't be bringing me here.
I'm alive, right?
I call their bluff, and they're not Mae anymore. Eyes in robes. They keep appearing, and the stone grows darker, and they keep offering to bring her to me. And keep trying to get me to come to them.
I think they were bound there. Trying to trick me, trying to take me. They admitted it, themselves. Free me of that fleshy prison or something like that. I must have been crazy to think this place was deserted, but now I have another dilemma. Are they really familiar with her, does she know them, or are they just predators waiting in the dark, tricksters I'm stuck with now?
Vorrick thinks I've lost it. He's acting like I've lost it. I'm scared. If I go there, if I listen, I hear, now. I can't help but wonder if this was her intention. If she wants what they want. I thought she was trying to kill me before. I did. Not out of malice, but because she thinks it's the right thing to do for me.
Fuck. Listen to me.
Yes, I'm scared. I can't sleep. So long with her over my shoulder, the feeling of eyes on the back of my head had become a comforting thing. And now she's gone, but I still feel the eyes, and I'm scared, I can't sleep. I don't want to. I stopped with the potions, for a few days. Everything hurt, I didn't care, I had my wits about me. I thought so. Maybe I was worse without them.
He thinks I'm crazy, but he talked a little sense into me. Or a little nonsense. then he dipped into the dreamfoil, and now I did too and
I think I shouldn't have listened to him but maybe he was right
I should be looking for her right now but for all I know she's watching all of this and it's funny to her Mae where the hell are you this is not funny