Recent Life Lessons
They say, "Attitude is everything." However, the mantra of my days of late is: "Perspective is everything."
It's true that our attitude can change how we experience a situation, but I find my attitude corresponds with how I'm feeling. And it can be difficult to change how I feel. Perspective, on the other hand, deals with how I view a situation. And I find, if I can change my view on a situation, it seems to have a more powerful effect on my overall attitude.
Perspective tends to help me see the big picture. And when I step outside of my immediate situation and see things in a broader view, I tend to be able to see things more clearly.
When I was taking our birth class, we had a mother's only session. One of the questions was "What do you want to remember as you become a mother?" I had recently read a blog by a mom, which had significantly impacted me. The article was titled "I'm Gonna Miss This." In the article, she spoke of an experience where perspective totally change how she viewed mothering. By the time I finished the article, I had tears running down my cheeks. I wanted to never forget the lesson she provided for this soon-to-be mom. I made a decision to always keep perspective.
I've found perspective has been important in caring for a newborn. Being a mom is quite the experience. It requires a lot of work physically and emotionally. With the arrival of a child, your world suddenly changes. It can be a lot to handle. But that hardly means you're doomed to a bad experience.
Nights around here can be interesting. Two or three times a week, we have a really hard time getting Ethan to sleep. He will fight sleep with all he's got. On nights like these, he will easily go three or four hours (often until 1 or 2 AM) struggling to let himself fall asleep. He'll be zoney and look like he's on the very edge of sleeping and then suddenly it's as if he realizes sleep is about to take him and he'll become alert again. He doesn't normally cry the whole time (thanks to Dr. Harvey Karp and his suggested baby calming techniques), but it's still exhausting waiting for him to finally give in to sleep.
Normally on these nights, I'm okay with the process. However, sometimes I struggle with frustration (normally on the nights when he is harder to calm) as exhaustion starts to take over me. My mind starts to wander into irritation as I think about how I just want to sleep.
As those feelings start to attack, I try to remind myself to keep perspective. I generally focus on two things: this won't last forever and this won't last forever. First, this won't last forever because he will fall asleep eventually and a fresh new day will come. Moreover, he will move out of this phase and learn to sleep better. Secondly, and more importantly, this won't last forever and as the writer of the blog entry said, I'm gonna miss this. There will come a time all too soon when I won't be able to cuddle and snuggle my newborn to sleep. And there will come a time when I will wish I could cuddle and snuggle him to sleep just one last time. In fact, there will probably come a time when I would give a lot and gladly do it all night long if I could.
Infants grow and change at a remarkable rate. Each phase is precious. How can I allow myself to wish any part of it away? It can be challenging work, but it is a gift. It is an honor. I have been given the privilege to love and care for this precious life. I don't want to take that for granted.
I am so thankful for this time to be reminded to keep perspective so often. May God help me learn this lesson so I may better apply it to life in general. May I always remember perspective is everything.
It's true that our attitude can change how we experience a situation, but I find my attitude corresponds with how I'm feeling. And it can be difficult to change how I feel. Perspective, on the other hand, deals with how I view a situation. And I find, if I can change my view on a situation, it seems to have a more powerful effect on my overall attitude.
Perspective tends to help me see the big picture. And when I step outside of my immediate situation and see things in a broader view, I tend to be able to see things more clearly.
When I was taking our birth class, we had a mother's only session. One of the questions was "What do you want to remember as you become a mother?" I had recently read a blog by a mom, which had significantly impacted me. The article was titled "I'm Gonna Miss This." In the article, she spoke of an experience where perspective totally change how she viewed mothering. By the time I finished the article, I had tears running down my cheeks. I wanted to never forget the lesson she provided for this soon-to-be mom. I made a decision to always keep perspective.
I've found perspective has been important in caring for a newborn. Being a mom is quite the experience. It requires a lot of work physically and emotionally. With the arrival of a child, your world suddenly changes. It can be a lot to handle. But that hardly means you're doomed to a bad experience.
Nights around here can be interesting. Two or three times a week, we have a really hard time getting Ethan to sleep. He will fight sleep with all he's got. On nights like these, he will easily go three or four hours (often until 1 or 2 AM) struggling to let himself fall asleep. He'll be zoney and look like he's on the very edge of sleeping and then suddenly it's as if he realizes sleep is about to take him and he'll become alert again. He doesn't normally cry the whole time (thanks to Dr. Harvey Karp and his suggested baby calming techniques), but it's still exhausting waiting for him to finally give in to sleep.
Normally on these nights, I'm okay with the process. However, sometimes I struggle with frustration (normally on the nights when he is harder to calm) as exhaustion starts to take over me. My mind starts to wander into irritation as I think about how I just want to sleep.
As those feelings start to attack, I try to remind myself to keep perspective. I generally focus on two things: this won't last forever and this won't last forever. First, this won't last forever because he will fall asleep eventually and a fresh new day will come. Moreover, he will move out of this phase and learn to sleep better. Secondly, and more importantly, this won't last forever and as the writer of the blog entry said, I'm gonna miss this. There will come a time all too soon when I won't be able to cuddle and snuggle my newborn to sleep. And there will come a time when I will wish I could cuddle and snuggle him to sleep just one last time. In fact, there will probably come a time when I would give a lot and gladly do it all night long if I could.
Infants grow and change at a remarkable rate. Each phase is precious. How can I allow myself to wish any part of it away? It can be challenging work, but it is a gift. It is an honor. I have been given the privilege to love and care for this precious life. I don't want to take that for granted.
I am so thankful for this time to be reminded to keep perspective so often. May God help me learn this lesson so I may better apply it to life in general. May I always remember perspective is everything.