An Open Letter to My Body
Well done. Superb use of available resources. You waited until I'd found a replacement for me, given my resignation, and actually left my job before suffering a complete systems failure. LOVELY.
I realise that I've been holding you together by sheer willpower for the past 6 months, but the nausea is a nice way of bringing that sharply into focus. The persistent nose bleed from coughing so much is an especially efficient means of blood-letting - I'll have to see if there's a leech farm nearby to supplement it though. Oddly enough, compared to the pain of the toothache, I'd almost welcome the distraction of sticking a slimy invertebrate up my right nostril.
It was entirely my fault that we were out of painkillers when this hit - sorry about that, otherwise we could have both enjoyed it as much as you seemed to, if the shivering and fever were anything to go by.
However, I do think that the suspected pneumonia is just showing off.
STOP FUCKING FALLING APART LONG ENOUGH FOR ME TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT ALL OF THIS.
Yours, Your Brain Overlord.
On a side note - yes, I've finally handed in my notice at work and am in the process of finishing up. I've largely resolved the other issues in my life and was still a stressed out munchkin, so I'm taking the next 3-4 months off, doing some reasonably serious snowboarding, and will seek new employment in the spring / summer.