....haven't updated for so long....
so i woke up today feeling fine then went ate breakfast had like 5 muffins because i was hungry and they were fucking good. then the fun started
~~~~then i go back to my room right after and 2 minutes later my mom bangs on my door screaming at me to leave the door open because she doesnt want me throwing up. wtf i was still half asleep to make everything even better. thanks mum
****she then continues to rant and rave like a crazy fucking bitch about how throwing up my food can kill me and all this other happy stuff that i just wasnt in the mood for. i then screamed at her that i didnt fucking throw up today and she then trys to figure out the "deep" meaning behind when i mean by "didnt throw up today". omfg i soooooooo wasn't in the mood for her shit so i told her to fuck off and if i want to kill myself by throwing up then i can. even though i didnt even throw up hah nice...
she just left my room and shut the door after she was bitching 2 seconds ago about leaving it open. agh. but ya thats been basically my whole weekend...shit. i might pierce something else on my body today...i just feel like it.
is it weird that i like poking holes and shit in my body? but i dont want to do it because im depressed or any shit like that...which i think almost makes it worse...LOFL. i just like it. LOVE IT. fucking P E R I O D.
talking and talked to certain people today as well about certain shit. just getting used sounds better than one might think at the moment. physcial love is better in the long run than mental anyways. no way of getting hurt or attached in the end. all u have is something amazing that lasts seconds and u dont have to deal with the person afterwards...hmm good deal mate. so this thanksgiving im going to be giving more than just thanks and eating more than just punpkin pie...hahahah LOFL i find that funny as fucking hell
went to see finding neverland last night with my mom. it was DEPRESSED as fuck. but good really good. i thought it was. i've never cried in a movie theater before but then i did. actually i didnt cry. i bawled my fucking eyes out. by the time we left the theatre my eye makeup was literally gone. then on top of it in the car the song "broken" was being played on the radio like i swear on every station until we got home. that song just fueled my crieing.
but it felt really good. i havent truely creid for awhile. i creid a tear for everything in my life no matter how gay you think that sounds. but i mostly cried for what i can't make right no matter how hard i try. but try you must right? hah ya.... right
~~~~then i go back to my room right after and 2 minutes later my mom bangs on my door screaming at me to leave the door open because she doesnt want me throwing up. wtf i was still half asleep to make everything even better. thanks mum
****she then continues to rant and rave like a crazy fucking bitch about how throwing up my food can kill me and all this other happy stuff that i just wasnt in the mood for. i then screamed at her that i didnt fucking throw up today and she then trys to figure out the "deep" meaning behind when i mean by "didnt throw up today". omfg i soooooooo wasn't in the mood for her shit so i told her to fuck off and if i want to kill myself by throwing up then i can. even though i didnt even throw up hah nice...
she just left my room and shut the door after she was bitching 2 seconds ago about leaving it open. agh. but ya thats been basically my whole weekend...shit. i might pierce something else on my body today...i just feel like it.
is it weird that i like poking holes and shit in my body? but i dont want to do it because im depressed or any shit like that...which i think almost makes it worse...LOFL. i just like it. LOVE IT. fucking P E R I O D.
talking and talked to certain people today as well about certain shit. just getting used sounds better than one might think at the moment. physcial love is better in the long run than mental anyways. no way of getting hurt or attached in the end. all u have is something amazing that lasts seconds and u dont have to deal with the person afterwards...hmm good deal mate. so this thanksgiving im going to be giving more than just thanks and eating more than just punpkin pie...hahahah LOFL i find that funny as fucking hell
went to see finding neverland last night with my mom. it was DEPRESSED as fuck. but good really good. i thought it was. i've never cried in a movie theater before but then i did. actually i didnt cry. i bawled my fucking eyes out. by the time we left the theatre my eye makeup was literally gone. then on top of it in the car the song "broken" was being played on the radio like i swear on every station until we got home. that song just fueled my crieing.
but it felt really good. i havent truely creid for awhile. i creid a tear for everything in my life no matter how gay you think that sounds. but i mostly cried for what i can't make right no matter how hard i try. but try you must right? hah ya.... right