I did that because I know you guys sit and talk shit about me on Wolfhome. I never did anything BAD to any of you. I'm sorry I whine a lot, and I'm sorry I'm never happy, or feel okay. I'm sorry that I always feel alone. I wish I could change that. I tried to help when you I could - I gave you money, I bought your paintings, but you guys still felt the need to talk bad about me.
Clearly all I've done is annoy you and others - your comments in my journal were becoming overwhelmingly. I have a journal to vent my feelings; they don't have to be feelings you agree with, but they're mine and that's all I have. To feel like I have to stop writing in my own personal journal because others are judging me behind my back is terrible, terrible feeling.
I DO care about you, more than the others, because I thought you were a good person and you've been through a lot, a lot that nobody should have to go through and it isn't fair. But I've always been bad at judging people's character, because if in the end all I've done is annoy you with my whiny journal, than you aren't who I thought you were.
I'm sorry it came down to me deleting you and the other people from ~*Wolfhome*~ but it's clear that I don't fit in with you guys anymore. I need a place where I cane write and feel safe. My journal is suppose to be MINE, not a place where I'm afraid to express how I feel.
i'm sorry, what have /i/ said behind your back that i haven't said to your face? i am very well aware that you've tried to help me, and i have always appreciated it. as far as leaving you overwhelming comments -- all my comments and intents have been supportive even when i knew i couldn't actually do anything for you, aside from ONE disagreement in MY journal that i shrugged off.
i very well agree that your journal is a place for you to be safe and if you are uncomfortable around me, then i damn well understand your need to separate yourself. what i am NOT understanding is what i have done to you, and i'd really like to know that.
Just because you've said it to my face doesn't mean you have the right to talk about me in a public forum. What I write about in my journal is private - Wolfhome's chat rooms are not the place to be discussing my personal life and decisions. I'm sorry that the way I live my life is unacceptable to you and everybody else - I'm always "unhappy" or "whining" about my situation - but that doesn't mean it's okay to talk about me. It's very apparent that if you feel the need to talk about me - behind my back - that there is a level of dislike or distaste for myself. If that's the case then I feel its more appropriate to astray myself from the situation so nobody has to hear me "whine" about how "unhappy" I am.
I never said you did anything TO me, directly, except talk about me behind my back. When I was informed of that I was really hurt - thus my reaction of deleting all of you. I've never felt the need to talk about anybody, even if I felt that person's situation or whatever was something I disagreed with. I really like you Cambria and I'm really hurt to know that you and the others make entertainment for yourselves by judging me and my situation and how I handle it. I know I whine, I know I'm unhappy, I know I don't handle things well but what good does it do you to talk about that on Wolfhome?
sorry, i must be dumb as shit, because i'm really missing out on what apparently i've been saying about you all over wolfhome. in fact, the only conversation that comes to mind is when you were upset that jessi hadn't drawn you something for christmas, and jessi felt bad and was really upset. that is the ONLY conversation that i can think of about you.
i don't mean this in a condescending way: i have far more important shit to be upset and whine about, than your lj entries? i'm sorry that "someone" felt the need to tell you that "everyone on wolfhome" or whatever does nothing except talk shit about you. we all whine. we're all unhappy.
next time she tells you people are saying something about you, ask for the conversations. she's notorious for starting shit when she is mad at someone.
i love you steph, and you know that. i'm pretty sure i've done my best to always be there for you and make that clear. if you are going to take the word of someone who EVERYONE is very well aware pulls this shit all the time, then maybe my judgement was wrong too. maybe you really aren't the kind of friend i need.
you can blame me for whatever you want. i don't talk shit about you all over wolfhome. if you don't believe me, sorry, that's your loss. i hope things get better for you. if you ever need me, i am still going to be here, and i'll always try to help. i'll delete you off lj though because that's apparently what you want.
Clearly all I've done is annoy you and others - your comments in my journal were becoming overwhelmingly. I have a journal to vent my feelings; they don't have to be feelings you agree with, but they're mine and that's all I have. To feel like I have to stop writing in my own personal journal because others are judging me behind my back is terrible, terrible feeling.
I DO care about you, more than the others, because I thought you were a good person and you've been through a lot, a lot that nobody should have to go through and it isn't fair. But I've always been bad at judging people's character, because if in the end all I've done is annoy you with my whiny journal, than you aren't who I thought you were.
I'm sorry it came down to me deleting you and the other people from ~*Wolfhome*~ but it's clear that I don't fit in with you guys anymore. I need a place where I cane write and feel safe. My journal is suppose to be MINE, not a place where I'm afraid to express how I feel.
Reply
i very well agree that your journal is a place for you to be safe and if you are uncomfortable around me, then i damn well understand your need to separate yourself. what i am NOT understanding is what i have done to you, and i'd really like to know that.
Reply
I never said you did anything TO me, directly, except talk about me behind my back. When I was informed of that I was really hurt - thus my reaction of deleting all of you. I've never felt the need to talk about anybody, even if I felt that person's situation or whatever was something I disagreed with. I really like you Cambria and I'm really hurt to know that you and the others make entertainment for yourselves by judging me and my situation and how I handle it. I know I whine, I know I'm unhappy, I know I don't handle things well but what good does it do you to talk about that on Wolfhome?
It does nothing.
Reply
i don't mean this in a condescending way: i have far more important shit to be upset and whine about, than your lj entries? i'm sorry that "someone" felt the need to tell you that "everyone on wolfhome" or whatever does nothing except talk shit about you. we all whine. we're all unhappy.
next time she tells you people are saying something about you, ask for the conversations. she's notorious for starting shit when she is mad at someone.
Reply
you can blame me for whatever you want. i don't talk shit about you all over wolfhome. if you don't believe me, sorry, that's your loss. i hope things get better for you. if you ever need me, i am still going to be here, and i'll always try to help. i'll delete you off lj though because that's apparently what you want.
Reply
Leave a comment