Madness Consumes
This is not right. I feel it. Time has folded upon itself. Links that were once strong now severed in the wake of someone elses mayhem. How is this coming to pass. Things are out of line, not in the right order. This is not the way it should be. I am stricken with this overwhelming knowledge that what I am is not what I was to become. Others set it into place. Motions, movements, pawns in some grand scale game places on a seperate track. For what purpose? So that I may rise in newness? That this form that I have taken would not be?
I sense it.. the way it could have been. The memories cascade upon me, things that were are now not so. Why is this madness within me? I am unsure. Perhaps Wesley knows why this is. I go to him but he is in a state of peril. His own mind poisoned by hatred of me. I cannot bide by this behavior. It does not suit me. It does not make others tremble with fear. Instead this doubt. It fills me. I do not like this... this feeling. How can they allow this to continue? Do they not see someone pulling the strings. Do they not notice the one making grander moves beyond their sight?
I must find the path towards the way it could have been. Tiny seconds overlapping from one side of eternal hell to another. The seams are showing between the two planes. Hemmoraging out of me. Like putrid bile, flowing into an abyss. The abyss howls and aches for what should have occurred. I have to find it. The timeline that was once before. I need to make it whole again. Close the wound within me and make me what I should be.
These others do not know they are sickening me with their grief for this form that I have taken. Lethargic minds doing nothing to fix what has been altered. How can they not see what has occurred? Does my power not impress them. Does it not make then quake with doubt of their own mortality?
"Disgusting... you shall see how I am to be worshipped. The world will scream and my name shall ease their pain and my hand bring death that much quicker."
"Yeah.. and pet while you're out? Might want to see if you can fetch Angel.."
The half breed speaks to me as if I am nothing. Tedious tasks that require no skill or power at all. Seeking their leader as if he is misplaced. I shall find him and bring him back. Bring him to his knees and make him cower before my might. Fetch their leader like some minion or scavenger, I do their bidding now only to quell their thoughts that I am not powerful enough to do so.
I concentrate feeling the ebb of the timeline wrapping itself around me. It pulls me into it and I walk between now and forever. The world beckons me, pulls me inward but I resist as I know my destination is a far way off. How Angel has ended up on this plane is curious to me. I was not aware that this plane was with any presence worth a single glance.
However I find him. Unfit ruler of all that he controls. Fate tied to something he cannot even grasp. I see him hovering over a female. More disgusting human behaviors that display only vulgarities and undesirable attributes. Once the ebb subsides around me I feel something familiar, yet unknown to me. This place... it holds something that I once knew. I shake my head unable to allow such thoughts to poison my task.
"Angel, those that think to worship and follow you blindy to their deaths are seeking you. They have sent me into this place to bring you back. If I must I shall bring the female as well. Although I am not sure this is proper. The arangement we had is not substantial to me anymore. I seek more than what you have offered. I shall return you only if you will grant me something."
His head moved tilting towards me. I do not like this look he is giving me. It is one of confusion and distaste. He is different. I can sense it. Small moments out of alignment.
"Will you look at that. Fancy Old Barney's getting her gal pal here to do some errands. Must be too difficult for her to keep up with her little game. Now she's recruited some Blue Weirdo to play some games too. Fine.. Take me. Go on! See if I care."
This anger and hostility. I have not seen it from the Angel that I have seen. This is all wrong. Timelines that have folded upon themselves are being unfolded in the wrong order. Someone is pulling dimensions and time together. This could explain so much. Why I am not how I should be. Why things that were foretold feel so incorrect.
"I must take you. You and the female. You were not to be, and because you are it has made chaos upon my fate. I do not wish to be something I was not destined to be. I will not become lesser by whatever tricks you have played."
"Angel.. how does she know about the tricks you did?"
"Shhh.. I'll handle this. Look you don't scare me.. not even that damned Feather Sportin' Freak scared me, so take me. Go on!! Do your best."
"Innsolence!! How dare you speak to me like that. I am the Shaper of Things. I can crush you and make you like the scum upon my floor. You will learn that you do not cross my path without earning your fate."
I waved my hand in the air. Creating a portal back to the building where the Wolf the Ram and the Hart had made their kingdom.
"Oooh, look she does swirly things too.. I am scared...."
"Angel.. ummm.. I mean this just doesn't look right? Are you sure--"
"Quiet! I shall take you both and prove you my might."
I walk to them footsteps quick and solid. They shall have the fear of me in them yet. I grab their shoulders dragging them with my might I hurl them into the portal. They are but tiny specs in the astral field now. I move towards the portal when it closes before I will it to do so.
"Neat trick Illy.. I mean really I thought you would have just left me alone. All that I set into motion for you? And this is how you repay me? Sure.. I didn't cover all the timelines.. but I did take care of the important ones.. and now? You... well at least this you, is what? Still stuck in that bag of sticks.. still leaking all that power and energy for what? to end up here taking away my pets?"
I turn to see who could be so callous of my presence.
"Why do I know you... what form do you take?"
"Sweetie? This is my form, and well I take? What i want... and well you are sort of just in the wrong time and the well.. wrong time. This place? You weren't suppose to find, but now? Now that you did? I am going to have to fix that. See ... you have a map here now.. been here walked the miles.. so.. I am just going to have to keep you here."
"You cannot hinder me to such a place. I can leave just as I came. No one can bind me where I do not wish to stay."
"Yeah... well guess what? My Island? My rules.. and well right now? You are a might too strong for this place.. so why don't we just take care of that."
I see her move, and I go to stop time, slow the world but it does not stop. Her hands move at the same rate they had moments before.
"See.. I saw you. Been keeping my eye on those two lovebirds waiting to drop the bomb on the one, but well you sort of messed that up. Although what you did? Much more interesting. I mean Angelus? At Wolfram and Hart? Now there is something I actually should have thought of. Buffy will most likely be turned.. or better yet? Killed. However you? I wasn't going to let you just come and go as you pleased fetching little strays here and there. So I brought this... oh and this."
The feathered one spoke to me as if she knew of my powers. Of what I was to become. I was not aware of who she was, nor what fate I had brought to her. However she held out a stone, and I knew of it. Linked to me by time and lineage, something I had forgotten. I watched as she placed the stone into the top of the wooden box. The dials and knobs spun until it had opened.
I screamed in agony as all that I was.. all that I was meant to be was pulled from me. Pulled out of my shell. The energy the power that I was to control. All that I had placed into this vessel was being drawn from me and placed into that box. How this had happened. Was it the half breed? Did he see this path for me and set me onto my doom? If I shall ever return to him. A great retribution shall be sought onto him.
I collapsed to the ground empty and hollow, this vessel now holding only my form. This was some cruel joke brought onto me by those who sought to destroy me. This... this lack of self is more painful than any harm they could have imagined.
"Listen doll.. you keep cool, and who knows maybe I won't make a fortune selling this box o'Illyria, and maybe.. just maybe? I will set you free.. but I think you just cost me two people.. so I think you owe me."
I pick my head up to scream at the one that has cast me into shadows, but she is gone. I lay here now.. only the shell, and it is sickening to me. Whatever madness this is.. that has consumed me whole and left me on this world.
I sense it.. the way it could have been. The memories cascade upon me, things that were are now not so. Why is this madness within me? I am unsure. Perhaps Wesley knows why this is. I go to him but he is in a state of peril. His own mind poisoned by hatred of me. I cannot bide by this behavior. It does not suit me. It does not make others tremble with fear. Instead this doubt. It fills me. I do not like this... this feeling. How can they allow this to continue? Do they not see someone pulling the strings. Do they not notice the one making grander moves beyond their sight?
I must find the path towards the way it could have been. Tiny seconds overlapping from one side of eternal hell to another. The seams are showing between the two planes. Hemmoraging out of me. Like putrid bile, flowing into an abyss. The abyss howls and aches for what should have occurred. I have to find it. The timeline that was once before. I need to make it whole again. Close the wound within me and make me what I should be.
These others do not know they are sickening me with their grief for this form that I have taken. Lethargic minds doing nothing to fix what has been altered. How can they not see what has occurred? Does my power not impress them. Does it not make then quake with doubt of their own mortality?
"Disgusting... you shall see how I am to be worshipped. The world will scream and my name shall ease their pain and my hand bring death that much quicker."
"Yeah.. and pet while you're out? Might want to see if you can fetch Angel.."
The half breed speaks to me as if I am nothing. Tedious tasks that require no skill or power at all. Seeking their leader as if he is misplaced. I shall find him and bring him back. Bring him to his knees and make him cower before my might. Fetch their leader like some minion or scavenger, I do their bidding now only to quell their thoughts that I am not powerful enough to do so.
I concentrate feeling the ebb of the timeline wrapping itself around me. It pulls me into it and I walk between now and forever. The world beckons me, pulls me inward but I resist as I know my destination is a far way off. How Angel has ended up on this plane is curious to me. I was not aware that this plane was with any presence worth a single glance.
However I find him. Unfit ruler of all that he controls. Fate tied to something he cannot even grasp. I see him hovering over a female. More disgusting human behaviors that display only vulgarities and undesirable attributes. Once the ebb subsides around me I feel something familiar, yet unknown to me. This place... it holds something that I once knew. I shake my head unable to allow such thoughts to poison my task.
"Angel, those that think to worship and follow you blindy to their deaths are seeking you. They have sent me into this place to bring you back. If I must I shall bring the female as well. Although I am not sure this is proper. The arangement we had is not substantial to me anymore. I seek more than what you have offered. I shall return you only if you will grant me something."
His head moved tilting towards me. I do not like this look he is giving me. It is one of confusion and distaste. He is different. I can sense it. Small moments out of alignment.
"Will you look at that. Fancy Old Barney's getting her gal pal here to do some errands. Must be too difficult for her to keep up with her little game. Now she's recruited some Blue Weirdo to play some games too. Fine.. Take me. Go on! See if I care."
This anger and hostility. I have not seen it from the Angel that I have seen. This is all wrong. Timelines that have folded upon themselves are being unfolded in the wrong order. Someone is pulling dimensions and time together. This could explain so much. Why I am not how I should be. Why things that were foretold feel so incorrect.
"I must take you. You and the female. You were not to be, and because you are it has made chaos upon my fate. I do not wish to be something I was not destined to be. I will not become lesser by whatever tricks you have played."
"Angel.. how does she know about the tricks you did?"
"Shhh.. I'll handle this. Look you don't scare me.. not even that damned Feather Sportin' Freak scared me, so take me. Go on!! Do your best."
"Innsolence!! How dare you speak to me like that. I am the Shaper of Things. I can crush you and make you like the scum upon my floor. You will learn that you do not cross my path without earning your fate."
I waved my hand in the air. Creating a portal back to the building where the Wolf the Ram and the Hart had made their kingdom.
"Oooh, look she does swirly things too.. I am scared...."
"Angel.. ummm.. I mean this just doesn't look right? Are you sure--"
"Quiet! I shall take you both and prove you my might."
I walk to them footsteps quick and solid. They shall have the fear of me in them yet. I grab their shoulders dragging them with my might I hurl them into the portal. They are but tiny specs in the astral field now. I move towards the portal when it closes before I will it to do so.
"Neat trick Illy.. I mean really I thought you would have just left me alone. All that I set into motion for you? And this is how you repay me? Sure.. I didn't cover all the timelines.. but I did take care of the important ones.. and now? You... well at least this you, is what? Still stuck in that bag of sticks.. still leaking all that power and energy for what? to end up here taking away my pets?"
I turn to see who could be so callous of my presence.
"Why do I know you... what form do you take?"
"Sweetie? This is my form, and well I take? What i want... and well you are sort of just in the wrong time and the well.. wrong time. This place? You weren't suppose to find, but now? Now that you did? I am going to have to fix that. See ... you have a map here now.. been here walked the miles.. so.. I am just going to have to keep you here."
"You cannot hinder me to such a place. I can leave just as I came. No one can bind me where I do not wish to stay."
"Yeah... well guess what? My Island? My rules.. and well right now? You are a might too strong for this place.. so why don't we just take care of that."
I see her move, and I go to stop time, slow the world but it does not stop. Her hands move at the same rate they had moments before.
"See.. I saw you. Been keeping my eye on those two lovebirds waiting to drop the bomb on the one, but well you sort of messed that up. Although what you did? Much more interesting. I mean Angelus? At Wolfram and Hart? Now there is something I actually should have thought of. Buffy will most likely be turned.. or better yet? Killed. However you? I wasn't going to let you just come and go as you pleased fetching little strays here and there. So I brought this... oh and this."
The feathered one spoke to me as if she knew of my powers. Of what I was to become. I was not aware of who she was, nor what fate I had brought to her. However she held out a stone, and I knew of it. Linked to me by time and lineage, something I had forgotten. I watched as she placed the stone into the top of the wooden box. The dials and knobs spun until it had opened.
I screamed in agony as all that I was.. all that I was meant to be was pulled from me. Pulled out of my shell. The energy the power that I was to control. All that I had placed into this vessel was being drawn from me and placed into that box. How this had happened. Was it the half breed? Did he see this path for me and set me onto my doom? If I shall ever return to him. A great retribution shall be sought onto him.
I collapsed to the ground empty and hollow, this vessel now holding only my form. This was some cruel joke brought onto me by those who sought to destroy me. This... this lack of self is more painful than any harm they could have imagined.
"Listen doll.. you keep cool, and who knows maybe I won't make a fortune selling this box o'Illyria, and maybe.. just maybe? I will set you free.. but I think you just cost me two people.. so I think you owe me."
I pick my head up to scream at the one that has cast me into shadows, but she is gone. I lay here now.. only the shell, and it is sickening to me. Whatever madness this is.. that has consumed me whole and left me on this world.