Mad World
I think it's kind of funny. I think it's kinda sad.
The dreams where I am dieing are the best I've ever had.
I know I know. Too much Donnie Darko, but this song always makes us meloncoly and you know it. So soak it up bitch. This week has been a bit unusual. I find myself not knowing how I feel for once in a little bit. I thought I had it all figured out, my plan, my finances, my future. Off I went to another whirlwind adventure. Sadly, there is no adventure anymore. A man once said "Death is the only true adventure" never has that been more relevant than today's world. I'm not saying that I'm gonna kill myself I never could do that. ( although you know we thought about it many times) I'm just saying I would like to be able to see what the world would be like without me sometimes. How it would change, what people would do at my passing, etc etc. Also what if I had never been born how would not only the people I know but history in general be different. Will I ever change anything, if I have decendants will they ever do anything? This kind of crap keeps me up sometimes, dumb I know. I'm supposed to go to Cyn's apt tomorrow for a get together and I am. I just worry that her current/past/maybe again boyfriend will show and start some shit. I and I know she really doesn't need that right now. Eh fuck it. I really don't care here lately I'm numb to the whole world as it is to me. Of to wallow in self agitation.
The dreams where I am dieing are the best I've ever had.
I know I know. Too much Donnie Darko, but this song always makes us meloncoly and you know it. So soak it up bitch. This week has been a bit unusual. I find myself not knowing how I feel for once in a little bit. I thought I had it all figured out, my plan, my finances, my future. Off I went to another whirlwind adventure. Sadly, there is no adventure anymore. A man once said "Death is the only true adventure" never has that been more relevant than today's world. I'm not saying that I'm gonna kill myself I never could do that. ( although you know we thought about it many times) I'm just saying I would like to be able to see what the world would be like without me sometimes. How it would change, what people would do at my passing, etc etc. Also what if I had never been born how would not only the people I know but history in general be different. Will I ever change anything, if I have decendants will they ever do anything? This kind of crap keeps me up sometimes, dumb I know. I'm supposed to go to Cyn's apt tomorrow for a get together and I am. I just worry that her current/past/maybe again boyfriend will show and start some shit. I and I know she really doesn't need that right now. Eh fuck it. I really don't care here lately I'm numb to the whole world as it is to me. Of to wallow in self agitation.