(no subject)
i took Friday, the 30th off; the idea was that i'd get a fab hairdo to go along with all the fab clothes B & i had acquired throughout the week. we had ambitious plans, my Mom and i, for Friday. the schedule was rather insane, in the way that co-captain schedules of The Last Minute Players tend to be. it looked something like this:
Last Minute Player's Schedule for Friday, 30 June, 2006
07:45 AM - Bank for money to fund the weekend
08:00 AM - DMV to renew driver's license
10:00 AM - Lana to CJ's for hairdressing
01.30 PM - MAC cosmetic counter for lipgloss
01:45 PM - Catherines for badly needed underwear & jewelry
02:00 PM - Target or Some Such for toothpaste, shaving cream, & razors
02:25 PM - Hansen's Bakery for the cake
03:00 PM - Check in to the hotel
03:01 PM - Commence drinking
05:00 PM - Begin getting dressed
05:45 PM - Karina does Lana's Makeup
06:00 PM - Party Begins
ahem. no. thankfully i had enough sense to realize that we'd never be done with the DMV in time for me to drive back across town to CJ, so i suggested that we screw the law and renew our licenses later. after all, only my license was expiring on the 1st; we should be safe enough. so i was able to make it to CJ's in plenty of time for our appointment. for which, of course, she never showed. i sat like a loser in the shop for about 15 minutes before one of the other stylists told me that CJ's Mom was on the phone with the glorious news that CJ was in hospital getting tests for who knows what and no one had any idea when she'd done, so would i like to reschedule?
SCREECH.
i'm sorry, what? fuck you, Murphy's Law. nice to know i'd have to spend my birthday with a dirty rat's nest on me big fat head. fine. i'm a chick who can roll with punches. i'll just... holyjesuswhatthefuckamisupposedtodonow?! chill. fuck it. i went home, and promptly got drunk. because i'm sane like that. we ended up not leaving the apartment until about 2 PM. i got my MAC Instant Gold Lustreglass lipgloss, and we bought the underwear. and then i bought a J-Lo floopy droppy pretty little sun hat, thinking: Eureka! when in doubt, bluff it out! i'll just wear a sun hat to happy hour which is inside a nice, dimly lit bar where there
is.
no.
sun.
why Mensa keeps rejecting my application, i'll never know. we spent the next hour retrieving my last minute birthday cake, which, for some reason was plainer than Claire Danes.
"um... isn't there something missing on this vanilla flavored/french cream filled/buttercream iced cake?"
"like what?"
"like... decoration."
"oh. no."
"no?"
"no."
FINE. whatever. no matter. everyone knows it's not what the cake looks like, it's what it tastes like. but still, i'd like to take this moment to issue another hearty fuck you, to Murphy. we made it to the hotel by 5, checked in, and got ready in record time. since my hair resembled Evilene's and Dorothy was no where near to tame it, i decided to forego the swanky, slinky, sexy dress i'd purchased for the occasion. i settled for a kind of summery, beach/prairie look. not as unlikely as it reads. i wore a white broomstick skirt that was all filmy and layered and girly, and a summer sweater tube thingee. that's right, i went commando with my arms. still can't believe i did it, actually. i twisted my hair up and bobby pinned the hell out of it. all that was left to do was makeup, but Karina was running a bit late, so i went downstairs to reacclimate myself with my favorite bartenders, Trini & Arnulfo. except...
y'know, why even bother making plans when everything get's shot to shit? is it too much to ask that things like sick hair stylists, Claire Danes cakes, & missing bartenders not happen when i'm trying to celebrate a birthday? i mean, i'm just saying.
so. neither Trini nor Arnulfo were in attendance, Trini having shipped himself off to Colorado for fuck's sake, and Arnulfo attending his daughter's high school graduation. who the hell graduates kids at the end of June, i ask you! ugh. life, thou art foul. we ended up with Manny & Mark, who're not bad 2nd stringers, but they are definitely a far cry from the smoothe, suave, debonaire darlings i'm used to dealing with.
Karina got there and whisked me upstairs to turn my face into a work of art. awesome. i had a nice turn out, even though it was disappointing that most of the people i really wanted to see didn't show up. Michelle & Lance had something come up at the last minute, Margaret went to San Diego for a baseball game, Tonya had something come up... so, ok, i was starting to feel a little cast off and unloved. funny how that works. i was surrounded by at least twenty co-workers and friends, and my Mom, and all i could focus on were the people who couldn't come. happily, i didn't dwell too long on that. rather hard to be depressed when people are pouring wine and tequila and rum down my throat.
about 9 or 10'o clock, Mark hands me a bill for $70 bucks.