(no subject)
preparing for the upcoming flea and playing detective at the same time.
(im here bcos i need focus. there should not be room for distraction argh)
this is why i hate to be home. to be caught in this situation. to be suspicious. watching my mom act fishy.
hate confirming that something is indeed wrong.
hate that she's hiding things from us.
the thought of how we cannot trust her kills me.
the thought of how much shit my dad has to take kills me.
how he is still strong, still loving her and his will to inspire her kills me further.
bcos i think, i know. there's much more mess to this.
so bad, so rotten.... too painful to fix.
(im here bcos i need focus. there should not be room for distraction argh)
this is why i hate to be home. to be caught in this situation. to be suspicious. watching my mom act fishy.
hate confirming that something is indeed wrong.
hate that she's hiding things from us.
the thought of how we cannot trust her kills me.
the thought of how much shit my dad has to take kills me.
how he is still strong, still loving her and his will to inspire her kills me further.
bcos i think, i know. there's much more mess to this.
so bad, so rotten.... too painful to fix.