just a phase
Brent and I hopped a car to columbia for the ani difranco concert tonight, and she was amazing. There is something so instantaniously intoxicating about her stage presence, and her energy. She kept making jokes about ballet, painting majors, and the word caucus. Brent thought she was high. I like to think it's just natural excitement for performing. I've been sort of withdrawn and drawn into my art and work lately, but the other night I ended up bowling with courtney and molly. Whoever thought of pairing alchohol and sports together, was my personal hero that night. We swung by my house where molly talked to my mom for a while, and i was just there being tipsy in front of her, also pretty amusing.
the bowling and talking made me realize how amazing people are, and something about not taking time with people for granted, and enjoying myself when i'm out with friends, rather then going because i feel obligated... or i guess also realizing when to leave a situation and not feel guilty for wanting to leave. I guess i'm always learning and figuring out.
i started a paper making course, and am so excited about it. right now we are working on papers from rags, so i get to cut up and boil old shirts (bright magenta and teal linen shirts in my case) and transform them into paper, it's rather an amazing process. we watched a film about the twin rockers paper mill in indiana, the only handmade paper mill in the u.s., and it's in the middle of a small town- i decided i want to aprentance there and live alone in the woods making paper and art. i miss the pace of a small town, as much as i did bitch about bemidji. being in columbia tonight rekindled my love for college towns as i pulled brent in to such college/hippy stores.
i finished knitting the hat for baby ally, and it fit her perfectly, it was a baby/soft pastel blue, and the rim curls up, super cute. (thanks for the help and teaching on that maddie and jill)
i'm trying to devise a plan to move out of my parent's place. i was going to wait till the fall since i'll be out of the country all summer, but i think i need to leave before then, or i feel like i'm just burrying myself alive living here. just small things that add up, and as a result i feel like i'm 12 living here, eg. my mom waking up at 3, nervous i wasn't home yet, and calling brent's ceel phone. she didn't understand why that would be inappropriate or rude of her, and thought i was unjustified at being upset with her about it. this resulted in a 15 min. argument, she still doesn't understands and writes it off as "you're just upset about something else" or a "moody teenager" or plays the guilt card on me "well i'm sorry you don't have the money too move out and that we aren't making you happy, it's not easy being a parent either"....maybe thats precisly why i work so much, but in the end that just runs me down...
maybe i'm too dramatic when i'm tired. or maybe i'm just more honest with myself.
(sorry this is so long friends.)
the bowling and talking made me realize how amazing people are, and something about not taking time with people for granted, and enjoying myself when i'm out with friends, rather then going because i feel obligated... or i guess also realizing when to leave a situation and not feel guilty for wanting to leave. I guess i'm always learning and figuring out.
i started a paper making course, and am so excited about it. right now we are working on papers from rags, so i get to cut up and boil old shirts (bright magenta and teal linen shirts in my case) and transform them into paper, it's rather an amazing process. we watched a film about the twin rockers paper mill in indiana, the only handmade paper mill in the u.s., and it's in the middle of a small town- i decided i want to aprentance there and live alone in the woods making paper and art. i miss the pace of a small town, as much as i did bitch about bemidji. being in columbia tonight rekindled my love for college towns as i pulled brent in to such college/hippy stores.
i finished knitting the hat for baby ally, and it fit her perfectly, it was a baby/soft pastel blue, and the rim curls up, super cute. (thanks for the help and teaching on that maddie and jill)
i'm trying to devise a plan to move out of my parent's place. i was going to wait till the fall since i'll be out of the country all summer, but i think i need to leave before then, or i feel like i'm just burrying myself alive living here. just small things that add up, and as a result i feel like i'm 12 living here, eg. my mom waking up at 3, nervous i wasn't home yet, and calling brent's ceel phone. she didn't understand why that would be inappropriate or rude of her, and thought i was unjustified at being upset with her about it. this resulted in a 15 min. argument, she still doesn't understands and writes it off as "you're just upset about something else" or a "moody teenager" or plays the guilt card on me "well i'm sorry you don't have the money too move out and that we aren't making you happy, it's not easy being a parent either"....maybe thats precisly why i work so much, but in the end that just runs me down...
maybe i'm too dramatic when i'm tired. or maybe i'm just more honest with myself.
(sorry this is so long friends.)