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[lalalajustme]

I still can't believe it. I mean sure I have been depressed but how can you take your own life? I wonder why I haven't cried, I knew her after all. She always seemed to have a pessimistic view of the world. I really don't know the story behind that, actually I don't know much about her at all. We weren't exactly friends, more like acquaintences, hell matt was her friend but then alisia told me matt hadn't talked to her god if that were me I would feel guilty as hell. You know I havent really talked to anyone in a long while I think I use my having no phone charger as an excuse. My friends probably hate me by now. I am just wasting away and then I hear this and bam. I feel lucky, lucky that I have parents who love me, and friends who care I think they still care anyways. Truth be told I dont really know anyone on my friends list on lj, the only one I have ever met in person is shay. I don't even know why I am posting this, but I am. I know what it is to be down in that place though, to feel alone, even when your surrounded by people who care. Amber cares, Melissa cares, and so does Frinza maybe, and Alisia too.
Lets see what else is going on my brothers friend got kicked out his parents are users and yeah we felt bad but you know I hate when people make you feel guilty about stuff that isn't your fault I think it is in my nature to care. My mom does so does my dad really. I still havent done jack about work or school I am just as lost as ever.
tata for now.