Towel, please. [Random snooker bits from the first three days]
That's definitely a snazzy new bit of kit for Steve ('I can't wait for John Parrott to see this')and John and Stephen and co to play with, with the swiping and the zooming in and did they make each of the snooker players stand still and then prompt them to take a few steps forwards whilst they were filmed? Probably it's a computer generated thingummy-bob because for some of the player they wouldn't have known they were going to be there until Wednesday. 'Here is insert-name-here who has this history and this season's form and this technique' and the 'Here is this guy, who, um, we don't know anything about. Um.'
I'm just saying when your video piece is mostly about how the snooker player can complete a Rubik's cube, it might be the point at which you start rethinking your strategy. Or you bring the game to all the interviews and watch the players struggle with it and maybe make a leader board as to who finishes it fastest or throws it at the camera first.
The ability to make snooker players look like they're doing things is a power probably best only used for good. Still wish I had it though.
Perhaps the rejigging of the rankings to be money-based isn't to keep Ronnie around for a bit longer despite his picking and choosing which tournaments to not show up at. That might be the impression they're giving anyways. Might not need it at all if the world number 33 manages to scoop the title, and he's not looking as ring-rusty as he might've been, so. The list of people who aren't in the tournament already - Williams, Dott, Ebdon, Stevens, etc - is getting weirdly long without a whole lot of debutants to fill in the gaps it seems.
I don't know if Ken is regretting kissing the carpet last time out if he's going to get prompted into doing it each time. Worked though, even if he will have to face someone who is probably going to be too Alan McManus shaped for my liking. Not that there's anything wrong with McManus' shape - it's pretty much the same one he had 15-20 years ago. Aww, and they're still making Ken do his job of work, despite his not being out of the tournament yet.
Rob Walker wouldn't let one of cameramen have a Creme Egg of the several he'd brought to the Sunday session to hand out on the entirely spurious grounds that he wasn't under 15. And then told Michael's mum not to look when the VT was playing of 'isn't Ding great, just look at all the tournaments he's won this year' was playing. And Pointless people were handing out questions (snooker based ones for people to fill in) - there's going to be a thing on Tuesday apparently.
Terry Griffiths not in the commentary box in time to be introduced because he works with two of the four players in that Sunday's afternoon matches - Ding, Carter and co. Hopefully not in the actual same match. Might be difficult talking up your guy's chances and how to best attack the other guy, and then turning round and doing it all again in reverse. Steve and Dennis - who we weren't to mention who won one of the greatest ever finals etc - were a bit more timely.
I really liked the little video that World Snooker had put together (and was vaguely grumpy not to find it on their Youtube channel) - complete with warning that they didn't take responsibility for their staff's acting ability & follow-up warning '... especially Brendan Moore' where Paul Collier & Michaela Tabb were behaving properly at a snooker match and Brendan Moore was showing exactly what not to do, complete with notices popping up about not shoving, being considerate, turning off phones, etc. While Brendan dashed through a corridor and almost rugby tackled an unsuspecting bloke, or he was waving at people and chatting on his phone 'til Paul Collier rolled his eyes and took Brendan's phone away, or he was having trouble with his programme - holding out far in front, loudly flipping pages, twisting it about and then upside-down until Michaela - complete with eye-rolling - turned it the right way up, or he was slumped with his head in hands while 'Smile you might be on TV' sloganned across the picture.
It was funnier than it sounds, put like that, I swear.
The referees might not go out and fight crime together but I am totally imagining that they do now. (Or wondering how they picked which referees to appear in the sketch. I mean, I can't imagine Eirian Williams acting in Moore's place for that.)
Really catchy underlying music too, damn it.
The players' walk on music Which is partly for mocking purposes - Really, Murphy, really? And partly for the so very apt with the hitting of nails on heads 'Return of the Mack', Alan? Referees walk-on music was 'The boys are back in town'
And John Parrott trying to get Steve Davis to pull off a shot from the tournament - which he did, once out of five - and then being all, you did better than I thought you would, and Hazel reckoning he's good, he should play snooker professionally 'I'm trying!'.
Michael Wasley clearly needs bigger hands or larger fingers - trying repeatedly to bridge over a bunch of balls, and trying and trying and trying and no. I don't recall thatparticular brand of spiky - it's not a regular spider, or the spider with an extra branch, so much as it is a spider with a complete tree grown off the side. (Of which, the 6-3 scoreline was a bit on the flattering side to Ding there, with trading back and forth and not playing great great when he started to pull out those final frames of the session.
Nor were either of the particularly speedy - not if you've only just started the seventh frame of your second session when they take up the board so we can see in from the other side of the theatre, and it was McManus and Higgins on the other side (who aren't renowned as the worlds speediest players). Didn't realise it was that late - or quite what Terry Camilleri was deep in conversation about with Wasley at the end of the frame - wouldn't have heard the announcement when it was called as the final frame of the session, if it was. Something of a traffic jam trying to get out, as it were gone half-six and there were peeps milling around for the evening session.
(Brain must have been running slow as well when I got to the station - looked at the 1850, thought I've got ages 'til then, wandered over to the platform, saw the train was already there, still thought I've got ages, looked at the clock - right above said train - and it's at that point something clicked in my brain that no, no I really didn't, leg it onto the train in the couple of minutes before it takes off.)
And then I get home, watch Selby finish off White, and Wasley and Ding come back slowly enough that they evidently don't realise I have to get up early tomorrow (which is technically today at this point) for work. And Ding's out / Wasley - 'it's pronounced woz-ere, I checked' is through. Bit of an upset there. More so than Doherty's continued existence in the tournament. That must be - that's a lot of final frame deciders so far already?
This is proving achronological, isn't it?
Are the referees supposed to shout at each other's audiences to be quiet? Jan and Eirian interrupted each session of Terry's Wasley-Ding match to make peopl be quiet.
For reference on the Monday afternoon - I didn't snag one of the questions for Sunday - the two Pointless questions were to 'Name any player who has beaten Steve Davis or Stephen Hendry at the Crucible' and 'Name any Scottish player who has played at the Crucible' which is, I suppose, at least aiming its questions at a hopefully knowledgable audience. Don't think I'd've got many of the non-obvious ones though.
It's remarkably difficult to take pictures while applauding, and it's pretty much ingrained at this point to clap when Rob Walker tells me too/when the players come out. The clapping won out over a couple of shaky-not quite blurry pictures. but sometimes I just need to have a couple extra hands. (The players did manage to walk out and wave eventually, though there was a point in the waiting and the waiting and the we're almost ready we're just waiting for the players's where I as starting to wonder about the latter.)
And reminding us that John was debutant to Alan when they first met at the Crucible in the early 90's. Did he miss one? Because that doesn't quite jibe with the 20 appearances they were introducing him as.
I'm not sure what was up with Alan 'I'd just like to draw attention to the fact that I'm wearing trousers today' McManus. Must have been either that, or 'I woke up late today and am still wearing half my pyjamas' Not that I should mock seeing as it was evidently working for him but I'm going to anyway.
First frame was a longe one, fairly small breaks & a lot of tactical play. And not that I don't like fast games and high breaks, but there's something that just relaxes in the brain at a properly tactical well fought game. Didn't hurt none that John won that one. Made up for it in the next few frames, when Alan pretty much had the ball on a string as it went wherever he wanted it to. My brain slip-sliding from, so long as he comes out of the session ahead, to well 5-4 down's not too bad, to 6-3 is at least potentially salvagable, to oh my god just win another frame, please.
Jan Verhaas evidently can't hold his drink. Or more accurately, shouldn't be let near other people's as he sidestepped into Alan's table, knocked over his bottles and spilled it on the floor, to much snickering by the players, and that accompanied by a round of applause from the rest of us. Oops!
Now that was just showing off - Alan 'trying to live up to my nickname' McManus finishing off in the second frame, not far off from the black to top left and thumping it into one cushion, then another, then down the length of the table to plop into the bottom right corner pocket.
Jan Verhaas slayer of bugs and stray flecks of chalk!
Bit of frustration creeping into John's brain during the sixth. Probably a good idea to keep playing at the end of that, remind himself that he can pot a few balls in a row, and landed some likely looking shots leaving Alan snugged up behind the pink awkward for the blue. Not enough to take the frame but. And neither was the string up to 49 (his highest of the match so far) in the next.
Then because when you're 6-1 down, when is the better time to start stringing off the red-black-red-black-red's? And okay it might be a bit early to be thinking of the 147 but there wasn't anyone on that side of the hanging board who wasn't. And that black into the bottom right wobbling and flicking off the pocket, and John starts back to his seat because woe Alan's going to repeat his performance of the last frame, except the black is trundling slowly along the rail toward the opposite pocket while the audience realization hits and we're all yelling at the ball to 'go on, go on, get in --- yeah!' as it slowly creeps to the pocket and drops when John's almost at his seat and he has to turn roud to see what's happened. And okay, it didn't make 147, but yay for audience participication snooker and even more for a second frame finally on the board. And then another, and okay in most circumstances a 3-6 scoreline in a game of first to 10 would have my meart dropped to my knees if not quite my boots (and when the realisation of what that means for what John'd need to pull out of the bag for the second session to win it probably will sink further) but it's outweughed by the almost tangible 1-8 / 2-7 scoreline I was anticipating at some point. John plays entirely too many matches where I come out of them thinking thank god that wasn't as bad as I'd thought it would've been at one point.
I think I'm going to have to cling to the fact that Ding was 6-3 up and lost, in the hope that John can do a Michael Wasley (or better - I'm not attached that much to a final frame decider) to play Ken in the next round.
I'm just saying when your video piece is mostly about how the snooker player can complete a Rubik's cube, it might be the point at which you start rethinking your strategy. Or you bring the game to all the interviews and watch the players struggle with it and maybe make a leader board as to who finishes it fastest or throws it at the camera first.
The ability to make snooker players look like they're doing things is a power probably best only used for good. Still wish I had it though.
Perhaps the rejigging of the rankings to be money-based isn't to keep Ronnie around for a bit longer despite his picking and choosing which tournaments to not show up at. That might be the impression they're giving anyways. Might not need it at all if the world number 33 manages to scoop the title, and he's not looking as ring-rusty as he might've been, so. The list of people who aren't in the tournament already - Williams, Dott, Ebdon, Stevens, etc - is getting weirdly long without a whole lot of debutants to fill in the gaps it seems.
I don't know if Ken is regretting kissing the carpet last time out if he's going to get prompted into doing it each time. Worked though, even if he will have to face someone who is probably going to be too Alan McManus shaped for my liking. Not that there's anything wrong with McManus' shape - it's pretty much the same one he had 15-20 years ago. Aww, and they're still making Ken do his job of work, despite his not being out of the tournament yet.
Rob Walker wouldn't let one of cameramen have a Creme Egg of the several he'd brought to the Sunday session to hand out on the entirely spurious grounds that he wasn't under 15. And then told Michael's mum not to look when the VT was playing of 'isn't Ding great, just look at all the tournaments he's won this year' was playing. And Pointless people were handing out questions (snooker based ones for people to fill in) - there's going to be a thing on Tuesday apparently.
Terry Griffiths not in the commentary box in time to be introduced because he works with two of the four players in that Sunday's afternoon matches - Ding, Carter and co. Hopefully not in the actual same match. Might be difficult talking up your guy's chances and how to best attack the other guy, and then turning round and doing it all again in reverse. Steve and Dennis - who we weren't to mention who won one of the greatest ever finals etc - were a bit more timely.
I really liked the little video that World Snooker had put together (and was vaguely grumpy not to find it on their Youtube channel) - complete with warning that they didn't take responsibility for their staff's acting ability & follow-up warning '... especially Brendan Moore' where Paul Collier & Michaela Tabb were behaving properly at a snooker match and Brendan Moore was showing exactly what not to do, complete with notices popping up about not shoving, being considerate, turning off phones, etc. While Brendan dashed through a corridor and almost rugby tackled an unsuspecting bloke, or he was waving at people and chatting on his phone 'til Paul Collier rolled his eyes and took Brendan's phone away, or he was having trouble with his programme - holding out far in front, loudly flipping pages, twisting it about and then upside-down until Michaela - complete with eye-rolling - turned it the right way up, or he was slumped with his head in hands while 'Smile you might be on TV' sloganned across the picture.
It was funnier than it sounds, put like that, I swear.
The referees might not go out and fight crime together but I am totally imagining that they do now. (Or wondering how they picked which referees to appear in the sketch. I mean, I can't imagine Eirian Williams acting in Moore's place for that.)
Really catchy underlying music too, damn it.
The players' walk on music Which is partly for mocking purposes - Really, Murphy, really? And partly for the so very apt with the hitting of nails on heads 'Return of the Mack', Alan? Referees walk-on music was 'The boys are back in town'
And John Parrott trying to get Steve Davis to pull off a shot from the tournament - which he did, once out of five - and then being all, you did better than I thought you would, and Hazel reckoning he's good, he should play snooker professionally 'I'm trying!'.
Michael Wasley clearly needs bigger hands or larger fingers - trying repeatedly to bridge over a bunch of balls, and trying and trying and trying and no. I don't recall thatparticular brand of spiky - it's not a regular spider, or the spider with an extra branch, so much as it is a spider with a complete tree grown off the side. (Of which, the 6-3 scoreline was a bit on the flattering side to Ding there, with trading back and forth and not playing great great when he started to pull out those final frames of the session.
Nor were either of the particularly speedy - not if you've only just started the seventh frame of your second session when they take up the board so we can see in from the other side of the theatre, and it was McManus and Higgins on the other side (who aren't renowned as the worlds speediest players). Didn't realise it was that late - or quite what Terry Camilleri was deep in conversation about with Wasley at the end of the frame - wouldn't have heard the announcement when it was called as the final frame of the session, if it was. Something of a traffic jam trying to get out, as it were gone half-six and there were peeps milling around for the evening session.
(Brain must have been running slow as well when I got to the station - looked at the 1850, thought I've got ages 'til then, wandered over to the platform, saw the train was already there, still thought I've got ages, looked at the clock - right above said train - and it's at that point something clicked in my brain that no, no I really didn't, leg it onto the train in the couple of minutes before it takes off.)
And then I get home, watch Selby finish off White, and Wasley and Ding come back slowly enough that they evidently don't realise I have to get up early tomorrow (which is technically today at this point) for work. And Ding's out / Wasley - 'it's pronounced woz-ere, I checked' is through. Bit of an upset there. More so than Doherty's continued existence in the tournament. That must be - that's a lot of final frame deciders so far already?
This is proving achronological, isn't it?
Are the referees supposed to shout at each other's audiences to be quiet? Jan and Eirian interrupted each session of Terry's Wasley-Ding match to make peopl be quiet.
For reference on the Monday afternoon - I didn't snag one of the questions for Sunday - the two Pointless questions were to 'Name any player who has beaten Steve Davis or Stephen Hendry at the Crucible' and 'Name any Scottish player who has played at the Crucible' which is, I suppose, at least aiming its questions at a hopefully knowledgable audience. Don't think I'd've got many of the non-obvious ones though.
It's remarkably difficult to take pictures while applauding, and it's pretty much ingrained at this point to clap when Rob Walker tells me too/when the players come out. The clapping won out over a couple of shaky-not quite blurry pictures. but sometimes I just need to have a couple extra hands. (The players did manage to walk out and wave eventually, though there was a point in the waiting and the waiting and the we're almost ready we're just waiting for the players's where I as starting to wonder about the latter.)
And reminding us that John was debutant to Alan when they first met at the Crucible in the early 90's. Did he miss one? Because that doesn't quite jibe with the 20 appearances they were introducing him as.
I'm not sure what was up with Alan 'I'd just like to draw attention to the fact that I'm wearing trousers today' McManus. Must have been either that, or 'I woke up late today and am still wearing half my pyjamas' Not that I should mock seeing as it was evidently working for him but I'm going to anyway.
First frame was a longe one, fairly small breaks & a lot of tactical play. And not that I don't like fast games and high breaks, but there's something that just relaxes in the brain at a properly tactical well fought game. Didn't hurt none that John won that one. Made up for it in the next few frames, when Alan pretty much had the ball on a string as it went wherever he wanted it to. My brain slip-sliding from, so long as he comes out of the session ahead, to well 5-4 down's not too bad, to 6-3 is at least potentially salvagable, to oh my god just win another frame, please.
Jan Verhaas evidently can't hold his drink. Or more accurately, shouldn't be let near other people's as he sidestepped into Alan's table, knocked over his bottles and spilled it on the floor, to much snickering by the players, and that accompanied by a round of applause from the rest of us. Oops!
Now that was just showing off - Alan 'trying to live up to my nickname' McManus finishing off in the second frame, not far off from the black to top left and thumping it into one cushion, then another, then down the length of the table to plop into the bottom right corner pocket.
Jan Verhaas slayer of bugs and stray flecks of chalk!
Bit of frustration creeping into John's brain during the sixth. Probably a good idea to keep playing at the end of that, remind himself that he can pot a few balls in a row, and landed some likely looking shots leaving Alan snugged up behind the pink awkward for the blue. Not enough to take the frame but. And neither was the string up to 49 (his highest of the match so far) in the next.
Then because when you're 6-1 down, when is the better time to start stringing off the red-black-red-black-red's? And okay it might be a bit early to be thinking of the 147 but there wasn't anyone on that side of the hanging board who wasn't. And that black into the bottom right wobbling and flicking off the pocket, and John starts back to his seat because woe Alan's going to repeat his performance of the last frame, except the black is trundling slowly along the rail toward the opposite pocket while the audience realization hits and we're all yelling at the ball to 'go on, go on, get in --- yeah!' as it slowly creeps to the pocket and drops when John's almost at his seat and he has to turn roud to see what's happened. And okay, it didn't make 147, but yay for audience participication snooker and even more for a second frame finally on the board. And then another, and okay in most circumstances a 3-6 scoreline in a game of first to 10 would have my meart dropped to my knees if not quite my boots (and when the realisation of what that means for what John'd need to pull out of the bag for the second session to win it probably will sink further) but it's outweughed by the almost tangible 1-8 / 2-7 scoreline I was anticipating at some point. John plays entirely too many matches where I come out of them thinking thank god that wasn't as bad as I'd thought it would've been at one point.
I think I'm going to have to cling to the fact that Ding was 6-3 up and lost, in the hope that John can do a Michael Wasley (or better - I'm not attached that much to a final frame decider) to play Ken in the next round.