Goodbye you can keep this suit of lights
It's a loud rock and roll night. So what better way to drown out the inevidable then with mindless really loud music. This is the kick off song for the rest of the night.
"Gone"--U2
You get to feel so guilty, got so much for so little
Then you find that feeling just won't go away
You're holding on to every little thing so tightly
'Til there's nothing left for you anyway
Goodbye...
You can keep this suit of lights
I'll be up with the sun
I'm not coming down
I'm not coming down
I'm not coming down
You wanted to get somewhere so badly
You had to lose yourself along the way
You change your name, well that's okay, it's necessary
And what you leave behind you don't miss anyway
Goodbye...
You can keep this suit of lights
I'll be up with the sun
I'm not coming down
I'm not coming down
I'm not coming down
'Cause I'm already gone
Felt that way all along
Closer to you every day
I didn't want it that much anyway
You're taking steps that make you feel dizzy / (Gone)
Then you learn to like the way it feels / (Gone)
You hurt yourself you hurt your lover / (Gone)
Then you discover
What you thought was freedom is just greed / (Gone)
Goodbye...
And it's emotional
Good night...
I'll be up with the sun
Are you still holding on
I'm not coming down
I'm not coming down
I'm not coming down
Gone... sun... time... sun...
Gone... sun.... gone... sun...
Sun...
By the way, the reason I'm in such a bad mood, is because I need to go work out something that I'm just not ready too yet. I'm still mad, and hurt. This weekend brought back memories that I never wanted to re-visit. But re-visit them I did. Now the pain that I had managed to keep under control for the past two years, is back. The hurt, the betrayal, the anger...it all came back. Now I've become a total recluse. I don't want anything to do with it, and it's starting to show. I know I need to talk it out, to forgive again, but I'm really not ready to.
I should I really should. I don't wanna build up my walls again. That's no fun because then no one wants to be around me. I can become a really cold hard person if allowed. And I won't allow myself to do that to myself. So for now I'm gonna play the cold bitter, b*tch until I can get over my stupid pride and talk it out.