Importance of Being Single
Everyone knows the importance of being in a relationship. We gain companionship, emotional connection, and sex. We all strive for it because humans are sociable creatures. We need to feel like we are a unit with someone to feel happy. Some can be satisfied with friendships and other platonic relationships, but the majority of people search for the "love of their life". So much so, that I don't think people really think about the importance of being single.
I guess one of the big questions is, when are people capable of falling in love? At what point is someone mentally and emotionally prepared to experience the real deal? You see it all the time, especially with younger people. A couple thinks they are completely and infallibly in love, and then a month later, all hell breaks loose and the relationship falls apart. Relationships end because either one or both people involved are unsatisfied in some way. Sometimes it can be worked on and fixed. And other times it can't. There are just some things that can't be worked on while you're trying to make things work with someone else.
As corny as it is, I think that people are capable of falling in love when they love and respect themselves. We've all heard it before. If you don't respect yourself, others won't respect you. If you don't love yourself, you don't feel like you're worthy of someone else's love, and it eventually turns into the other person constantly trying to convince you of their affection. And that is exhausting and creates a strain on the relationship.
But that's the importance of being single. We really have to know ourselves and our needs before we date someone else and expect them to know everything. We have to be able to feel safe, and if you can't be safe on your own, how can you be safe with someone else? I know that I used to ignore my flaws. Not that I thought I was so amazing that I didn't have any. I didn't know how to handle them, so I just ignored them. But one of the things I've learned is that flaws are kind of like disabilities: you just have to find new ways to get around in life. And that's something that you have to learn on your own.
I don't think people are really capable of loving others until they feel safe with themselves. Otherwise, you're just using other people to make up for what you lack. And that's not really fair to anyone.
Yours,
Lainie
I guess one of the big questions is, when are people capable of falling in love? At what point is someone mentally and emotionally prepared to experience the real deal? You see it all the time, especially with younger people. A couple thinks they are completely and infallibly in love, and then a month later, all hell breaks loose and the relationship falls apart. Relationships end because either one or both people involved are unsatisfied in some way. Sometimes it can be worked on and fixed. And other times it can't. There are just some things that can't be worked on while you're trying to make things work with someone else.
As corny as it is, I think that people are capable of falling in love when they love and respect themselves. We've all heard it before. If you don't respect yourself, others won't respect you. If you don't love yourself, you don't feel like you're worthy of someone else's love, and it eventually turns into the other person constantly trying to convince you of their affection. And that is exhausting and creates a strain on the relationship.
But that's the importance of being single. We really have to know ourselves and our needs before we date someone else and expect them to know everything. We have to be able to feel safe, and if you can't be safe on your own, how can you be safe with someone else? I know that I used to ignore my flaws. Not that I thought I was so amazing that I didn't have any. I didn't know how to handle them, so I just ignored them. But one of the things I've learned is that flaws are kind of like disabilities: you just have to find new ways to get around in life. And that's something that you have to learn on your own.
I don't think people are really capable of loving others until they feel safe with themselves. Otherwise, you're just using other people to make up for what you lack. And that's not really fair to anyone.
Yours,
Lainie