(no subject)
For a long time I assumed the correct use of words would render even the most unintelligible fools the ability to communicate swiftly and decisively with their peers.
I was wrong.
Or, perhaps I was right. My absolute mastery of my own single language is not forthcoming and I'll never be able to communicate anything clearly and easily like I wish and hope to someday.
Forever will I be confusing, latent, vague and nondescript. Never will I really understand the words I try to use when I want to sound intelligent or even be able to pick from thin air the words best suited for even the simplest of conversations. To talk freely with anyone about one single subject will take time and lengthy, awkward silences. Texts posts will forever take me a minimum of fifteen to forty or more minutes to execute. They will be plagued with the red squiggly lines of misspellings and terrible fragmented sentences. Every conversation will remain a puzzle, impossible to complete verbally.
Sentences will simply end, their meanings left off to be inferred by the listener.
This is stupid. I started this at 10:45. Four of the words I did not know or understand prior to this year.
AKA Jenn discover strike tool, creates confusing shit. Goes to bed to forget about it.