Mar 08, 2007 12:33
It was my birthday yesterday. Wooo!
Well, not so much woo. I haven't done any drinking or crazy tom foolery or anything yet, I'm having a shindig on Saturday night so I think I'm trying to save it all up for then. I sent out a mass email to a bunch of friends, old and new, and requested their pressence, and I got a lot of positive response. But I keep having these horrible doubting feelings that no one will show up. Which leads me to my next point ....
I have made a decision. And that decision is to take this year between this birthday and the next to live for ME. I know it probably sounds super duper selfish, but that way I see it is that I've been treading water creatively and taking care of other people for the last 5 years, and I've let my physical and emotional health "fall by the wayside", if you will. I have turned into a selfdoubting defeatist housewife with little to no sense of adventure, and it fucking sucks! I've had enough of it, I want to feel pretty and energetic and creative anddynamic again, and I'm almost halfway to 30, so there's no better time to get the fuck in gear and start actually trying for something.
So, that said, these are a couple of my birthday resolutions:
1. Focus on health, both physical and emotional.
2. Do something creative everyday.
3. Everytime I do something positive for myself, acknowledge it and write it down ( My mom bought me a notebook called my Brava book, just for this purpose)
4. Fill an entire notebook with writing of some sort. Prose, poetry, musings, whatever.
5. At least once a month, I have to go out and actually do something. Going to a movie, or even better, a live show to watch a band or a play. I'm SO out of touch with this city right now, which is a damn shame because there's so much going on all the time.
And that's pretty much as far as I've gotten. Also, in highschool for english class they made us make "Life Goals Lists" where we had to write down 100 things we wanted to achieve before we die, and I'm thinking about digging it out and using it to help me write a new one.
So there you have it folks, the next 12 months, all ME all the time.
I hope it'll be great.
Have a good one ya'll.