New
New life. New Chapter, new everything. This journal has existed for 5 years now, but in the last two it has gone unused... I have written less of the day to day things and concentrated more on writing books and essays. But I miss the journal.
Mostly what I miss is going back in time and reading through things of an older self. Hearing my own thoughts pass through my mind once more as I reminisce on all that has changed, and all that has not. But now, I am a different person.
This last year has been... a horrifically traumatic period fraught with unknowable growth and desperation. While going through all of these odd, weird, strange, amazing little bits of life, I have been single- by choice. But I have come to the end of this journey, and I am ready to show another who I am, who I have become, in the way I have always wanted and dreamed. Only now I am ready. So friends, both old and new, get ready. Because I'm back!
By learning, I of course mean... found a way to truly implement. We all know these things, but I have found a way to live them. To make them real instead of just happy ideas.
How to love myself. So many times I have heard from romantics (of which I am one) that love should be concentrated towards others. That in a perfect and happy relationship, we only care for another in the place of ourselves, while letting that other support us in return. But self must come first. We cannot ignore what we want and need, because if we do such things, if we are unclear about what is needed, then what is the other giving us? What are we giving them when they have ignored what they need to be as happy as you want them to be? No, honesty must come first. We must center ourselves, find out what we are, who we are growing into, and hold that dear. Only when we love ourselves can we love another. It is acceptance, compassion, forgiveness, and understanding that must come from within before it can go without. Try loving yourself.
I have learned what the purpose of life is. The purpose of our lives, regardless of your religion or ideas, is to experience all that you can within life and then define who you are in reference to those experiences. This definition is not some complex set of ideals that create a reality, but rather a very simple thing: we ought to be defining ourselves as people who love, in every situation, no matter what happens. From this, salvation is a natural outcome. What greater inspiration for enlightenment exists? What greater message did Jesus give us? Whether we are Christian, Buddhist, Jewish, New Age, Athiest, or even Muslim, this is the one thing we have always been taught. In every verse of the Bible, the Koran, Talmud, Book of Mormon, exists this one unifying idea- that we are one, and love is all there is.
I have learned that acting out of obligation is the same as not acting. Choosing good in fear of punishment is the same thing as choosing the bad, because the true desire is still wrong. Adam and Eve were given the only choice that matters: Life or knowledge. Choose life, because the decisions that come from knowledge are still based in fear.
I have learned that I can only trust myself. No one else cares enough to do anything different. If I loose something, it is sown to the world. It will always come back.
Having the things you desire is not a matter of wanting and wishing, it is a matter of knowing and acting.
Everything has a meaning.
Perception is reality.
Mostly what I miss is going back in time and reading through things of an older self. Hearing my own thoughts pass through my mind once more as I reminisce on all that has changed, and all that has not. But now, I am a different person.
This last year has been... a horrifically traumatic period fraught with unknowable growth and desperation. While going through all of these odd, weird, strange, amazing little bits of life, I have been single- by choice. But I have come to the end of this journey, and I am ready to show another who I am, who I have become, in the way I have always wanted and dreamed. Only now I am ready. So friends, both old and new, get ready. Because I'm back!
By learning, I of course mean... found a way to truly implement. We all know these things, but I have found a way to live them. To make them real instead of just happy ideas.
How to love myself. So many times I have heard from romantics (of which I am one) that love should be concentrated towards others. That in a perfect and happy relationship, we only care for another in the place of ourselves, while letting that other support us in return. But self must come first. We cannot ignore what we want and need, because if we do such things, if we are unclear about what is needed, then what is the other giving us? What are we giving them when they have ignored what they need to be as happy as you want them to be? No, honesty must come first. We must center ourselves, find out what we are, who we are growing into, and hold that dear. Only when we love ourselves can we love another. It is acceptance, compassion, forgiveness, and understanding that must come from within before it can go without. Try loving yourself.
I have learned what the purpose of life is. The purpose of our lives, regardless of your religion or ideas, is to experience all that you can within life and then define who you are in reference to those experiences. This definition is not some complex set of ideals that create a reality, but rather a very simple thing: we ought to be defining ourselves as people who love, in every situation, no matter what happens. From this, salvation is a natural outcome. What greater inspiration for enlightenment exists? What greater message did Jesus give us? Whether we are Christian, Buddhist, Jewish, New Age, Athiest, or even Muslim, this is the one thing we have always been taught. In every verse of the Bible, the Koran, Talmud, Book of Mormon, exists this one unifying idea- that we are one, and love is all there is.
I have learned that acting out of obligation is the same as not acting. Choosing good in fear of punishment is the same thing as choosing the bad, because the true desire is still wrong. Adam and Eve were given the only choice that matters: Life or knowledge. Choose life, because the decisions that come from knowledge are still based in fear.
I have learned that I can only trust myself. No one else cares enough to do anything different. If I loose something, it is sown to the world. It will always come back.
Having the things you desire is not a matter of wanting and wishing, it is a matter of knowing and acting.
Everything has a meaning.
Perception is reality.