/dusts journal off
I really need to update this thing more often. Though there's not much to say that's actually important.
New year of law school will start next Monday alkjdf Finally I have all my main textbooks as well as all of the first day assignments. I've been waiting for the assignments for a while because I want to try and get a head start on them. So now they're all printed out and I'll start reading over them the next few days.
RP-wise...hahaaaa I did a major cleaning out.
@ somarium
I only have my "standard five" now as I like to call them since they've lasted the longest. Even if Kid is still the newest since he was apped in earlier this year, but no one after him has really stayed. spectaculaire, knightofchanges, smokesinspace, hatesviolence, and soulsymmetrical. I'm still amazed that Cid has lasted so long. He's hitting the two year mark soon. And Tamaki recently passed his three year mark with Som's birthday.
In other news, got two new mods on the team, and we're already off to a good start! I'm relieved because this'll help lessen the weight from my mind once classes start. Somarium's pretty fortunate in terms of "wank" and all that bad stuff for the past year and a half, so hopefully that trend will continue.
And things are getting pretty exciting in-game wise with the upcoming plots. Can't wait.
Also, VERY tempted to app Spyro in there xD But I think it's just a passing fancy, and it'll go away once classes starts. But he would fill in the missing slot, both character personality spectrum wise and my last slot. But for now, that sixth slot will stay vacant.
@ vatheon
Dropped Obi, Flynn Rider, and Princess Celestia, so now I only have noghostsplzkthx in there. I'm still feeling kind of shaky about the game as a whole-like I always have issues getting motivated to tag. But that was mostly because of my huge list, so lessening that to just Liz has helped a lot. Once I push out a few other things that are on my mind/to-do list, I'll feel even better. I do love my castmates, though. But if a bunch of dropped, I probably would, too.
@ soul_campaign
I joined Soul Campaign back in June with linefacemaster from Rurouni Kenshin. It was a bit of a rough start since haha silent/serious/always line-facing character can be hard to get out there :| But I still love the game and the premise, and he's part of the Watch and getting out more. I feel more confident, though still nervous when I'm tagging with him. High expectations, gah.
I also recently apped perfectorder there since the game didn't have one-which was kind of surprising considering that he's rather important. I still feel like I might be rushing in, especially since I'm still a new player and getting used to things. But I got in and I'm looking forward to playing him there. I'm used to playing manga-verse, so anime-verse will be interesting-if only factually. Also including the game's plot, it'll be an interesting take on his characterization. However, I don't think there will be too much change, other than him having to take on more responsibilities and basically being more of an adult. I just hope I don't screw something game-info wise sob.
Also, his icons took forever because I had to take screencaps. I cropped out 200. Iconned 100. WHAT IS MY LIFE.
And those are my only three active games. I recently dropped Casey from luceti, which again was a big weight on my mind. I just simply failed. Spectacularly. I was always shaky about her character and didn't click. I only really ever threaded with Taisa and Kazzi, and that's just...mmmeerrrff I feel ashamed. I'm glad they understand, though, and we did get a lot of CR threads done. I still feel like I was a big disappointment. But I won't lie. It really was a big weight on me and I feel so much better. There was just so much side guilt that no one was putting on me but, well, me. I know everyone else either just didn't care or understood, but even so...
Other than Somarium, I don't think I'll be apping into any games or any other characters in my current ones for a while. I've been feeling a kind of RP burnout in general, and it reminds me of last year. Maybe because I was home all summer, and it might pick up once classes start. But I think this time, I'll just keep the list as it is and stay low. Liz is social enough a character to get around Vatheon, and even though Aoshi is hard to get out, I have Kid to also help fill activity in SC. And I never have problems in Som, so, lol. I think this is good. A nice balance.
Some other things...I do have Martin's A Dance With Dragons since Clark loaned it to me, but I have yet to open a page, sob. I really should. I promised I would read it. I guess I'm just not as into the series as I used to be...
I'm also being distracted by this Soul Eater AU fanfic thing that I started not too long ago. ...Yeah....writing fanfiction...I think my last one was dated back in 2008? Possibly 2009? Haha, I just stopped following it because I was afraid that any headcanon from the writers might accidentally invade my own. And I'm afraid that writing out fanfiction will spawn headcanon in to my brain and alter my characterization and such.
But I should be writing more, if anything because I think I need it. It's just been so long, and it would help. So I'm just. Plodding away at it, wondering what the hell am I doing. I never like being in fandoms because dude. No offense to anyone in one, but there are a lot of crazy things in fandom. It's just a given. Not everyone, of course. Though that brings me to another thing that I've been thinking/noticing.
...I really am a conservative fan and RPer :|a Like, I look everywhere else and everyone is always willing to jump in and just do crazy stuff. While I laugh as a spectator, I could never actually bring myself to do it. Maybe I take things too seriously, but I just can't seem to follow. I don't think there's anything wrong with it, not at all! Especially when people are having fun with it. It really is just a "me" thing, but I'm afraid I might come off being pretentious or something. It's not like that...I've just never really been like that.
I like having things making logical sense. I could never understand the weird shipping trends (I mean, I could find some reasoning to it, but I could never agree), or some the fandom's major fanon theories. I'm not saying they're wrong (unless they really are and can be proved to be wrong), but I just can't agree, either. And I feel bad about it because I can't really join in conversations about it. Instead I just immediately try and stay away otherwise I'll feel awkward.
Which sucks because I want to be a part of it, but I don't want to be the odd one out and come off wrongly, you know? At least not with fellow castmates. If it was someone I didn't know or someone I did know well and know they would understand my opinions, then it's not a problem. But otherwise...I guess it's the nervous awkwardness of not wanting to give off the wrong impression and hurting the other person's feelings.
But like...for example I'm not into yaoi, so I can't even joke about any guy/guy shipping or even crack ideas involving it (this is mainly for fandom ships, not canon ones. canon ones I'm just /o/ okay! fandom ones make me go "uuuuh...hm.../thinks about it."). That doesn't mean I'm all "OMG YAOI GTFO", no xD I don't mind it at all. I just don't follow it. I hope that makes sense because argh, I don't want to come off the wrong way. Someone could talk about it all they want and I honestly would not mind. I might not understand it, but I won't start hating on it or anything. Well, there are some fandom ships that I would never agree to. Like Shizuo and Izaya from DRRR!!. It has nothing to do with yaoi, and everything to do with it just would not work. Kida and Masaomi? I was never into the BFF = love deal, BUT hey, I could see it and I wouldn't mind it at all. So there are two examples of it yaoi works for me. But I bring this up because pretty much 99% of the LJRP community is either really into it or somewhat into it. So I feel like the odd one out. Not their fault, just mine.
Again, it's not like I shy away from it. I just have no interest? /flailing. I have no idea how to say this and hopefully it doesn't come off wrong. I don't hate it, I just don't follow it-as in literally, I don't pay any attention to it. I honestly do not know how to say this any other way, and if it offended anyone reading this, I'm sorry. I just want to reiterate that I don't hate yaoi or am against it or anything like that. Like I said, I don't mind if people are talking about it. It's just not my thing so I wouldn't be able to get enthusiastic about it as one who is.
I even have difficulties with crack jokes! See, I told you I'm weird. I mean, I'll laugh and think them hysterical, but at the same time I'm thinking, "...But how would that ever work-" when that is basically the point: it wouldn't normally work, hence why it is crack. So I can't enjoy them as much as other people who are a lot more open to those things.
So yeah. TL;DR, I really am a conservative in a lot of things. That doesn't mean I shut out a lot of things-on the contrary, I'm open to them and respect them a lot. It's just...I myself personally wouldn't be as into it or might not understand it as well as other people. Again, that doesn't mean I wouldn't appreciate it or try to understand so that I can at least see where the person is coming from. I might have conservative views, but I'm not a hard right or something like that. I'm more middle. It does give an interesting and different perspective and spin on some topics, I admit. Also, it probably isn't really that surprising, especially for those who've known me for a while.
But now it's out there.
And I think that's it. I like how I always say, "I have nothing to write, all this is boring :|" and my entry ends up like. Super long |Da
New year of law school will start next Monday alkjdf Finally I have all my main textbooks as well as all of the first day assignments. I've been waiting for the assignments for a while because I want to try and get a head start on them. So now they're all printed out and I'll start reading over them the next few days.
RP-wise...hahaaaa I did a major cleaning out.
@ somarium
I only have my "standard five" now as I like to call them since they've lasted the longest. Even if Kid is still the newest since he was apped in earlier this year, but no one after him has really stayed. spectaculaire, knightofchanges, smokesinspace, hatesviolence, and soulsymmetrical. I'm still amazed that Cid has lasted so long. He's hitting the two year mark soon. And Tamaki recently passed his three year mark with Som's birthday.
In other news, got two new mods on the team, and we're already off to a good start! I'm relieved because this'll help lessen the weight from my mind once classes start. Somarium's pretty fortunate in terms of "wank" and all that bad stuff for the past year and a half, so hopefully that trend will continue.
And things are getting pretty exciting in-game wise with the upcoming plots. Can't wait.
Also, VERY tempted to app Spyro in there xD But I think it's just a passing fancy, and it'll go away once classes starts. But he would fill in the missing slot, both character personality spectrum wise and my last slot. But for now, that sixth slot will stay vacant.
@ vatheon
Dropped Obi, Flynn Rider, and Princess Celestia, so now I only have noghostsplzkthx in there. I'm still feeling kind of shaky about the game as a whole-like I always have issues getting motivated to tag. But that was mostly because of my huge list, so lessening that to just Liz has helped a lot. Once I push out a few other things that are on my mind/to-do list, I'll feel even better. I do love my castmates, though. But if a bunch of dropped, I probably would, too.
@ soul_campaign
I joined Soul Campaign back in June with linefacemaster from Rurouni Kenshin. It was a bit of a rough start since haha silent/serious/always line-facing character can be hard to get out there :| But I still love the game and the premise, and he's part of the Watch and getting out more. I feel more confident, though still nervous when I'm tagging with him. High expectations, gah.
I also recently apped perfectorder there since the game didn't have one-which was kind of surprising considering that he's rather important. I still feel like I might be rushing in, especially since I'm still a new player and getting used to things. But I got in and I'm looking forward to playing him there. I'm used to playing manga-verse, so anime-verse will be interesting-if only factually. Also including the game's plot, it'll be an interesting take on his characterization. However, I don't think there will be too much change, other than him having to take on more responsibilities and basically being more of an adult. I just hope I don't screw something game-info wise sob.
Also, his icons took forever because I had to take screencaps. I cropped out 200. Iconned 100. WHAT IS MY LIFE.
And those are my only three active games. I recently dropped Casey from luceti, which again was a big weight on my mind. I just simply failed. Spectacularly. I was always shaky about her character and didn't click. I only really ever threaded with Taisa and Kazzi, and that's just...mmmeerrrff I feel ashamed. I'm glad they understand, though, and we did get a lot of CR threads done. I still feel like I was a big disappointment. But I won't lie. It really was a big weight on me and I feel so much better. There was just so much side guilt that no one was putting on me but, well, me. I know everyone else either just didn't care or understood, but even so...
Other than Somarium, I don't think I'll be apping into any games or any other characters in my current ones for a while. I've been feeling a kind of RP burnout in general, and it reminds me of last year. Maybe because I was home all summer, and it might pick up once classes start. But I think this time, I'll just keep the list as it is and stay low. Liz is social enough a character to get around Vatheon, and even though Aoshi is hard to get out, I have Kid to also help fill activity in SC. And I never have problems in Som, so, lol. I think this is good. A nice balance.
Some other things...I do have Martin's A Dance With Dragons since Clark loaned it to me, but I have yet to open a page, sob. I really should. I promised I would read it. I guess I'm just not as into the series as I used to be...
I'm also being distracted by this Soul Eater AU fanfic thing that I started not too long ago. ...Yeah....writing fanfiction...I think my last one was dated back in 2008? Possibly 2009? Haha, I just stopped following it because I was afraid that any headcanon from the writers might accidentally invade my own. And I'm afraid that writing out fanfiction will spawn headcanon in to my brain and alter my characterization and such.
But I should be writing more, if anything because I think I need it. It's just been so long, and it would help. So I'm just. Plodding away at it, wondering what the hell am I doing. I never like being in fandoms because dude. No offense to anyone in one, but there are a lot of crazy things in fandom. It's just a given. Not everyone, of course. Though that brings me to another thing that I've been thinking/noticing.
...I really am a conservative fan and RPer :|a Like, I look everywhere else and everyone is always willing to jump in and just do crazy stuff. While I laugh as a spectator, I could never actually bring myself to do it. Maybe I take things too seriously, but I just can't seem to follow. I don't think there's anything wrong with it, not at all! Especially when people are having fun with it. It really is just a "me" thing, but I'm afraid I might come off being pretentious or something. It's not like that...I've just never really been like that.
I like having things making logical sense. I could never understand the weird shipping trends (I mean, I could find some reasoning to it, but I could never agree), or some the fandom's major fanon theories. I'm not saying they're wrong (unless they really are and can be proved to be wrong), but I just can't agree, either. And I feel bad about it because I can't really join in conversations about it. Instead I just immediately try and stay away otherwise I'll feel awkward.
Which sucks because I want to be a part of it, but I don't want to be the odd one out and come off wrongly, you know? At least not with fellow castmates. If it was someone I didn't know or someone I did know well and know they would understand my opinions, then it's not a problem. But otherwise...I guess it's the nervous awkwardness of not wanting to give off the wrong impression and hurting the other person's feelings.
But like...for example I'm not into yaoi, so I can't even joke about any guy/guy shipping or even crack ideas involving it (this is mainly for fandom ships, not canon ones. canon ones I'm just /o/ okay! fandom ones make me go "uuuuh...hm.../thinks about it."). That doesn't mean I'm all "OMG YAOI GTFO", no xD I don't mind it at all. I just don't follow it. I hope that makes sense because argh, I don't want to come off the wrong way. Someone could talk about it all they want and I honestly would not mind. I might not understand it, but I won't start hating on it or anything. Well, there are some fandom ships that I would never agree to. Like Shizuo and Izaya from DRRR!!. It has nothing to do with yaoi, and everything to do with it just would not work. Kida and Masaomi? I was never into the BFF = love deal, BUT hey, I could see it and I wouldn't mind it at all. So there are two examples of it yaoi works for me. But I bring this up because pretty much 99% of the LJRP community is either really into it or somewhat into it. So I feel like the odd one out. Not their fault, just mine.
Again, it's not like I shy away from it. I just have no interest? /flailing. I have no idea how to say this and hopefully it doesn't come off wrong. I don't hate it, I just don't follow it-as in literally, I don't pay any attention to it. I honestly do not know how to say this any other way, and if it offended anyone reading this, I'm sorry. I just want to reiterate that I don't hate yaoi or am against it or anything like that. Like I said, I don't mind if people are talking about it. It's just not my thing so I wouldn't be able to get enthusiastic about it as one who is.
I even have difficulties with crack jokes! See, I told you I'm weird. I mean, I'll laugh and think them hysterical, but at the same time I'm thinking, "...But how would that ever work-" when that is basically the point: it wouldn't normally work, hence why it is crack. So I can't enjoy them as much as other people who are a lot more open to those things.
So yeah. TL;DR, I really am a conservative in a lot of things. That doesn't mean I shut out a lot of things-on the contrary, I'm open to them and respect them a lot. It's just...I myself personally wouldn't be as into it or might not understand it as well as other people. Again, that doesn't mean I wouldn't appreciate it or try to understand so that I can at least see where the person is coming from. I might have conservative views, but I'm not a hard right or something like that. I'm more middle. It does give an interesting and different perspective and spin on some topics, I admit. Also, it probably isn't really that surprising, especially for those who've known me for a while.
But now it's out there.
And I think that's it. I like how I always say, "I have nothing to write, all this is boring :|" and my entry ends up like. Super long |Da