I can wait.
It took 5 minutes to load up the site, 5 more to remember my login name, and another 5 to change my password; 2 minutes after that to unblock my account.
It took me seconds to recognize you.
It took me days to get to know you.
It took me weeks to trust you.
It took me months to find you.
It took me years to know I needed you.
And now, after all this time, I am on a forgotten little blog in a remote part of the internet just to say something to you that I'm sure you'll never see. And the funny part is, I'm okay with that.
I don't want you to see this now.
I'm not ready.
After you left I found that sleep wouldn't come to me. Not one second have I slept in the past 27 hours and 12 minutes since you left on your trip to be with someone else who deserves better than what I want from you. She deserves your love, care, and kindness. She deserves your trust and fidelity. She deserves your passion and romance.
And after thinking about it long and hard (heh), I have come to the conclusion that I want you with every fiber of my being. I crave all you have to give. I need every primal pleasure and desire you could ever bestow upon me.
I have also realized one other thing:
I do not love you.
Yet.
And I so want to and hope to some day. I want to love you in every way both of us have ever dreamed possible, but never thought was probable. I want to love you in all the ways neither of us have ever dreamed to exist, yet grew before our stunned eyes. I want to love you in all the ways neither of us can ever even begin to imagine or fathom, and stare into that awful and powerful creation with hearts open and minds prepared to expand. I want to share that love with you in secret and in public for all to see. I want to share with the world, nay universe, NO! COSMOS! The love that I want to feel for you in all its splendid glory and awesome power demands no less than the audience of all creation!
However, I do not love you, yet.
But I can wait...
It took me seconds to recognize you.
It took me days to get to know you.
It took me weeks to trust you.
It took me months to find you.
It took me years to know I needed you.
And now, after all this time, I am on a forgotten little blog in a remote part of the internet just to say something to you that I'm sure you'll never see. And the funny part is, I'm okay with that.
I don't want you to see this now.
I'm not ready.
After you left I found that sleep wouldn't come to me. Not one second have I slept in the past 27 hours and 12 minutes since you left on your trip to be with someone else who deserves better than what I want from you. She deserves your love, care, and kindness. She deserves your trust and fidelity. She deserves your passion and romance.
And after thinking about it long and hard (heh), I have come to the conclusion that I want you with every fiber of my being. I crave all you have to give. I need every primal pleasure and desire you could ever bestow upon me.
I have also realized one other thing:
I do not love you.
Yet.
And I so want to and hope to some day. I want to love you in every way both of us have ever dreamed possible, but never thought was probable. I want to love you in all the ways neither of us have ever dreamed to exist, yet grew before our stunned eyes. I want to love you in all the ways neither of us can ever even begin to imagine or fathom, and stare into that awful and powerful creation with hearts open and minds prepared to expand. I want to share that love with you in secret and in public for all to see. I want to share with the world, nay universe, NO! COSMOS! The love that I want to feel for you in all its splendid glory and awesome power demands no less than the audience of all creation!
However, I do not love you, yet.
But I can wait...