Fic: Uncertain Glory
Title: Uncertain Glory
Pairing: Harry/Ginny
Rating: Teen
Length:~2500
Summary: A year later Harry still has something to tell.
Author’s Note: This fic was written for tari3 for r_becca’s Changing Seasons Fic Exchange I tried to include the requests, but I mostly wrote from the quote that tari3 gave me. I hope that you enjoy it. I want to send thanks to r_becca for hosting this exchange and as always I owe a ton of thanks to my BFF who shares half of my brain, my dear friend and beta ladytonks. I want to apologize again for being late with my entry.
"O, how this spring of love resembleth/ The uncertain glory of an April day!" ~Shakespeare
Uncertain Glory
If she had opened her eyes, there would have been blue sky over head and sunshine. For now, though, she was content to keep them closed and just enjoy the beginnings of warmth on her bare arms and the sound of the wind whispering through the leaves of the nearby trees. Ginny had slipped down just past Hagrid’s garden, thrown a blanket down on the new grass just behind a small hill of earth, and collapsed in a patch of afternoon sun. She was well aware that the mound of dirt sprouting tiny tufts of grass behind her happened to be the last resting place of a giant spider, but at this point in her life, Ginny Weasley did not care.
It was the first truly warm Saturday afternoon of spring and she had been shut up in the library for too long. Preparing for her N.E.W.T.s was more exhausting than she had imagined and probably made more difficult by the fact that her sixth year at Hogwarts had not exactly prepared her for standardized testing so much as guerilla warfare. It was days like today that made her question her decision to finish her school career properly, instead of just going out into the professional world as a war hero like some people she knew…
“You might not cast shadows when you’re under that cloak, Harry, but you’re still blocking the first decent bit of sunlight I have had in months,” Ginny whispered as she waved her hand in the direction of the shape that was soaking up the warmth of the sun before it reached her face and arms.
“How did you know I was even here? I wore the cloak! I used three different silencing spells this time!” Harry tried to keep his voice low and Ginny heard the rustle of his Invisibility Cloak falling to the ground.
“Oh, I don’t know. The most popular wizard in the country risks life and limb by stealing, illegally, onto school grounds to visit his long-suffering girlfriend; all under the prying eyes of one of the strictest Headmistresses that Hogwarts has ever known?” She still had her eyes closed. No one could impersonate Harry’s feeble attempts to sneak up on her. And besides that, McGonagall actually knew he had been coming onto the grounds to see Ginny. The Headmistress had done some rather intricate spell work to allow it.
“Your mom sent you the latest copy of Witch Weekly then?” Harry flopped down on the blanket next to her and laced his fingers through hers with what seemed almost like practiced ease. At least, Ginny thought that was what he was attempting. Harry was still nervous around her sometimes, especially if Ron was within a ten-mile radius.
“Hermione got it. She’s still keeping a close eye on Rita Skeeter. I don’t suppose that you have been able to link her to any nefarious, highly illegal activities have you?” Ginny began rubbing her thumb idly in circles on the back of Harry’s hand.
“Sadly, no.” She could hear the grin behind his words and she was tempted to open her eyes and look at him, but at this point it had almost become a game with herself to see how long she could wait to actually look at Harry.
“You should work harder.” Ginny bumped her elbow into Harry’s arm as she spoke in a mock attempt to chide him for his lack of effort. In reality, she knew that he and Ron had been working hard. She saw it in the headlines of the Daily Prophet often enough, even though Harry rarely mentioned the details of his work in his letters. Probably something she was going to have to get used to as long as he was in the Auror office.
“I know. Unfortunately, Kingsley wants us to round up all of the murderers before we start tracking down the truly evil like Rita.” Harry squeezed Ginny’s hand as he joked, and the pressure seemed to bring Ginny back from delving into the long-term implications of her last thought and she released his hand and rolled over.
“Anyway, I assumed that you would be a little bit more careful this time.” Ginny grinned down at Harry, meeting his eyes and feeling a delicious weight of happiness settle over her. Harry reached up and tucked several strands of hair behind Ginny’s ear so that he could see her face.
“Immortal invisibility cloak of myth and legend careful.” Harry licked his lips and Ginny couldn’t help herself. She had showed amazing restraint up to this point. Their smiling lips met and she kissed him slowly, savoring the feel of his mouth under hers. He matched her slow deliberate movements in a way that Ginny thought would never cease to amaze her.
“Mmm.” She pulled back and smiled. “Brilliant.”
“Thanks.” The kiss had galvanized his confidence. Harry wore a maddeningly adorable smirk, had a glazed-over look in his eyes and his tone of voice was equivalent to an audible swagger. It was a combination that had more than once spelled trouble for Ginny’s self-control.
“I meant the cloak.” Ginny rolled her eyes and then body, putting a bit more breathing room between her and the green-eyed devil; who, if given half a chance, would have parted Ginny from her sanity and knickers in one.
“Ouch. I’m crushed.” Harry clapped his hand to his chest, as if he had been brutally wounded by Ginny’s retort.
“Huh. I doubt it.” Ginny snickered as Harry propped himself up on an elbow and began twisting a strand of her hair with his free hand. For a long moment, he seemed to get lost in the way the sunlight played from gold to amber to deep russet. Ginny thought for a second that a cloud had passed over the sun, but it was Harry’s face that had gotten a dark, far away look. Ginny reached up and wordlessly stroked his cheek.
She was used to this. It happened to both of them on occasion. Some days it was a smell, a sound, just a hint of a certain color in an odd light or some bizarre combination surprising the senses. Anything might have triggered it, but Ginny knew that Harry was somewhere in the too raw and recent past. Harry caught her hand and pressed a soft kiss to her palm. A small ache was woven through the warmth that seemed to course down her arm.
Ginny slid her hand to the nape of Harry’s neck and pulled him down. There was a hard hunger tempered with sadness in the way he kissed her, the way his hand searched beneath the sun-warmed cotton of her shirt. Harry tasted of sugar and vanilla as Ginny’s tongue twisted against his. She gasped as he broke away and buried his head in the crook of her shoulder. The scrape of Harry’s teeth against her freckled skin caused her fingers to curl in his hair. Ginny almost missed the fact that Harry’s hand was trembling when it brushed over the lace of her bra.
It was that tremble of his fingers. The thought that the man who had saved all of England was nervous when he touched her invaded Ginny’s mind even as Harry’s hands continued to explore her body. He had no reason to be nervous, the one still-functioning corner of her mind stated, he had at one point over the Christmas holidays had this very same bra between his teeth. There was nothing new about what they were doing.
Ginny turned her head into Harry’s cheek in a wordless request to kiss him again. He obliged and their mouths met, as Harry’s hand slipped down over Ginny’s stomach and stilled against the curve of her waist. There was definitely something wrong. Ginny took her hand from Harry’s head and pushed against his shoulder. He gave in easily, another sign that something was not quite right.
Ginny rolled Harry onto his back and straddled him. His face was in Ginny’s shadow and she saw those beautiful green eyes go wide as she gave Harry The Look. It was the same one that she had given him just before he kissed her for the first time. It was the look that conveyed all of her passion and determination; at least that is what Harry told her.
“Harry, what is it?” Her voice was soft. He was still staring at Ginny as if he had yet to process the fact that she had asked him a question. Harry blinked and then swallowed. Ginny brushed a long bit of Harry’s unkempt hair out of his eyes, uncovering the hairline lightning bolt scar. “Harry?”
“Sorry, I got distracted…” His voice trailed off, and Ginny thought that if any other man had said such a thing at such a time, she probably would have slapped him; but this was Harry. “It was n…”
“Don’t say that it was nothing Harry.” Ginny cut over him in a firm whisper as she began to methodically brush the fringe away from Harry’s forehead. “It was something. You don’t have to tell me. If you don’t want to talk about it, I understand. But if it has to do with me, I deserve to know.”
Her voice had gotten louder than she had intended as she went. Maybe it was a reaction to the way that he had left things after Dumbledore’s funeral. Maybe it was her frustration that Harry was still, a year after the war was over, shutting her out of some parts of his life. Maybe it was because she was stuck at school again while Harry was out fighting the Dark Wizards and she felt helpless. Or maybe it was simply because she knew that she could help him, be there for him, make his world better if only he would let her.
Harry looked away and Ginny, with wisdom beyond her years, gave him a moment to collect himself. She followed his gaze and saw that he stared off toward a space in the trees where a path led into the Forbidden Forest. Ginny gulped as Harry took a deep breath and let out a long sigh. She knew that he had gone, less that a year ago, into that forest to face Voldemort.
Ginny wasn’t sure if she was ready to hear what Harry may have to say. She was aware of the general course of events of that meeting. She knew that Harry had faced Voldemort and that the dark wizard was unable to kill Harry. Beyond that, she knew very little of what was said or done. She braced herself as Harry looked away and began to speak.
“I saw you, just over there,” Harry pointed vaguely over his shoulder, “as I was walking out into the forest to… well, you know…” He didn’t even look at her to see Ginny nod in understanding. “A part of me, a big part of me, wanted you to somehow know that I was there. Like you did today.”
Ginny moved from above Harry and lay down again at his side. She curled into him, her head on his shoulder and their legs slipping into a comfortable tangle; and she listened.
Ginny listened as Harry told her that he knew that if he stopped to speak to Ginny that he would never have been able to follow that path to his destiny.
She listened as he told her about his fear of the unknown and how he was able to reach out to the one bit of comfort that was left him. Harry spoke of his parents, Lupin and Sirius, the words of comfort they gave him.
She listened, with tears silently streaming down her cheeks, as Harry told her that his parents promised to stay with him until the end, and how they did.
“And at the very end, when I knew that it was all going to be over, I was standing there and he leveled his wand at me,” Ginny held her breath as Harry continued, “And the last thought that sprang into my mind was of you. Your eyes. Your lips against mine.”
Ginny had no words. There was no reply to what Harry had just told her. She just held him close to her, and listened to the miracle that was his heartbeat beneath her ear.
“I have wanted to tell you, about a hundred times since that day. I mean I know it doesn’t make up for the way I ended things. But at least now I think that you know why I did it.” Harry pressed his cheek to Ginny’s forehead. “I mean I really thought that there was no way that we could ever have… well what we have now.”
“A future?” Ginny tilted her head up and Harry met her with a soft quick kiss.
“Yeah.” He breathed the word close against Ginny’s skin, and Harry turned on his side to face her.
“Thanks, Harry.” She met his eyes for the first time since he began telling her his story; they were bright warm and green just like the spring day that surrounded them.
“For what?” Harry looked a little confused and Ginny just smiled at him.
“For telling me. For trusting me. For letting me know that I meant that much to you.” With her free arm, Ginny pulled Harry to her so that the warmth of his body against hers eclipsed that of the sun on her skin.
“You still do.” Harry’s lips pressed against hers and Ginny wanted to burn that feeling into her mind forever. She wanted to lock and keep this afternoon so perfectly that if she watched it in a Pensieve she would not only see, but feel every sensation that she was experiencing.
“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?” Ginny asked after long moments of she and Harry simply holding on to each other. She watched as he looked away and Harry’s cheeks and ears began to turn red with an embarrassed blush.
“Umm, every time that I thought about how to tell you, in my head it always sounded like I was just trying to, umm you know.” Harry let go of Ginny and ran his hand nervously through his hair and shrugged his shoulders.
“No, I don’t. What do you mean?” Ginny raised an eyebrow and stared at him, waiting for an answer. It came out in a rush, but she could still make it out.
“I didn’t want you to think that I was just trying to get into your knickers.” The answer came tumbling out and Harry held his breath after as if he thought Ginny might hit him. She didn’t. Ginny just laughed and then pulled him back to her.
“Oh, Harry, it would take a lot less than that for you to get into my knickers.” Whatever Harry might have had to say to that revelation, was muffled by Ginny’s lips on his.
Pairing: Harry/Ginny
Rating: Teen
Length:~2500
Summary: A year later Harry still has something to tell.
Author’s Note: This fic was written for tari3 for r_becca’s Changing Seasons Fic Exchange I tried to include the requests, but I mostly wrote from the quote that tari3 gave me. I hope that you enjoy it. I want to send thanks to r_becca for hosting this exchange and as always I owe a ton of thanks to my BFF who shares half of my brain, my dear friend and beta ladytonks. I want to apologize again for being late with my entry.
"O, how this spring of love resembleth/ The uncertain glory of an April day!" ~Shakespeare
Uncertain Glory
If she had opened her eyes, there would have been blue sky over head and sunshine. For now, though, she was content to keep them closed and just enjoy the beginnings of warmth on her bare arms and the sound of the wind whispering through the leaves of the nearby trees. Ginny had slipped down just past Hagrid’s garden, thrown a blanket down on the new grass just behind a small hill of earth, and collapsed in a patch of afternoon sun. She was well aware that the mound of dirt sprouting tiny tufts of grass behind her happened to be the last resting place of a giant spider, but at this point in her life, Ginny Weasley did not care.
It was the first truly warm Saturday afternoon of spring and she had been shut up in the library for too long. Preparing for her N.E.W.T.s was more exhausting than she had imagined and probably made more difficult by the fact that her sixth year at Hogwarts had not exactly prepared her for standardized testing so much as guerilla warfare. It was days like today that made her question her decision to finish her school career properly, instead of just going out into the professional world as a war hero like some people she knew…
“You might not cast shadows when you’re under that cloak, Harry, but you’re still blocking the first decent bit of sunlight I have had in months,” Ginny whispered as she waved her hand in the direction of the shape that was soaking up the warmth of the sun before it reached her face and arms.
“How did you know I was even here? I wore the cloak! I used three different silencing spells this time!” Harry tried to keep his voice low and Ginny heard the rustle of his Invisibility Cloak falling to the ground.
“Oh, I don’t know. The most popular wizard in the country risks life and limb by stealing, illegally, onto school grounds to visit his long-suffering girlfriend; all under the prying eyes of one of the strictest Headmistresses that Hogwarts has ever known?” She still had her eyes closed. No one could impersonate Harry’s feeble attempts to sneak up on her. And besides that, McGonagall actually knew he had been coming onto the grounds to see Ginny. The Headmistress had done some rather intricate spell work to allow it.
“Your mom sent you the latest copy of Witch Weekly then?” Harry flopped down on the blanket next to her and laced his fingers through hers with what seemed almost like practiced ease. At least, Ginny thought that was what he was attempting. Harry was still nervous around her sometimes, especially if Ron was within a ten-mile radius.
“Hermione got it. She’s still keeping a close eye on Rita Skeeter. I don’t suppose that you have been able to link her to any nefarious, highly illegal activities have you?” Ginny began rubbing her thumb idly in circles on the back of Harry’s hand.
“Sadly, no.” She could hear the grin behind his words and she was tempted to open her eyes and look at him, but at this point it had almost become a game with herself to see how long she could wait to actually look at Harry.
“You should work harder.” Ginny bumped her elbow into Harry’s arm as she spoke in a mock attempt to chide him for his lack of effort. In reality, she knew that he and Ron had been working hard. She saw it in the headlines of the Daily Prophet often enough, even though Harry rarely mentioned the details of his work in his letters. Probably something she was going to have to get used to as long as he was in the Auror office.
“I know. Unfortunately, Kingsley wants us to round up all of the murderers before we start tracking down the truly evil like Rita.” Harry squeezed Ginny’s hand as he joked, and the pressure seemed to bring Ginny back from delving into the long-term implications of her last thought and she released his hand and rolled over.
“Anyway, I assumed that you would be a little bit more careful this time.” Ginny grinned down at Harry, meeting his eyes and feeling a delicious weight of happiness settle over her. Harry reached up and tucked several strands of hair behind Ginny’s ear so that he could see her face.
“Immortal invisibility cloak of myth and legend careful.” Harry licked his lips and Ginny couldn’t help herself. She had showed amazing restraint up to this point. Their smiling lips met and she kissed him slowly, savoring the feel of his mouth under hers. He matched her slow deliberate movements in a way that Ginny thought would never cease to amaze her.
“Mmm.” She pulled back and smiled. “Brilliant.”
“Thanks.” The kiss had galvanized his confidence. Harry wore a maddeningly adorable smirk, had a glazed-over look in his eyes and his tone of voice was equivalent to an audible swagger. It was a combination that had more than once spelled trouble for Ginny’s self-control.
“I meant the cloak.” Ginny rolled her eyes and then body, putting a bit more breathing room between her and the green-eyed devil; who, if given half a chance, would have parted Ginny from her sanity and knickers in one.
“Ouch. I’m crushed.” Harry clapped his hand to his chest, as if he had been brutally wounded by Ginny’s retort.
“Huh. I doubt it.” Ginny snickered as Harry propped himself up on an elbow and began twisting a strand of her hair with his free hand. For a long moment, he seemed to get lost in the way the sunlight played from gold to amber to deep russet. Ginny thought for a second that a cloud had passed over the sun, but it was Harry’s face that had gotten a dark, far away look. Ginny reached up and wordlessly stroked his cheek.
She was used to this. It happened to both of them on occasion. Some days it was a smell, a sound, just a hint of a certain color in an odd light or some bizarre combination surprising the senses. Anything might have triggered it, but Ginny knew that Harry was somewhere in the too raw and recent past. Harry caught her hand and pressed a soft kiss to her palm. A small ache was woven through the warmth that seemed to course down her arm.
Ginny slid her hand to the nape of Harry’s neck and pulled him down. There was a hard hunger tempered with sadness in the way he kissed her, the way his hand searched beneath the sun-warmed cotton of her shirt. Harry tasted of sugar and vanilla as Ginny’s tongue twisted against his. She gasped as he broke away and buried his head in the crook of her shoulder. The scrape of Harry’s teeth against her freckled skin caused her fingers to curl in his hair. Ginny almost missed the fact that Harry’s hand was trembling when it brushed over the lace of her bra.
It was that tremble of his fingers. The thought that the man who had saved all of England was nervous when he touched her invaded Ginny’s mind even as Harry’s hands continued to explore her body. He had no reason to be nervous, the one still-functioning corner of her mind stated, he had at one point over the Christmas holidays had this very same bra between his teeth. There was nothing new about what they were doing.
Ginny turned her head into Harry’s cheek in a wordless request to kiss him again. He obliged and their mouths met, as Harry’s hand slipped down over Ginny’s stomach and stilled against the curve of her waist. There was definitely something wrong. Ginny took her hand from Harry’s head and pushed against his shoulder. He gave in easily, another sign that something was not quite right.
Ginny rolled Harry onto his back and straddled him. His face was in Ginny’s shadow and she saw those beautiful green eyes go wide as she gave Harry The Look. It was the same one that she had given him just before he kissed her for the first time. It was the look that conveyed all of her passion and determination; at least that is what Harry told her.
“Harry, what is it?” Her voice was soft. He was still staring at Ginny as if he had yet to process the fact that she had asked him a question. Harry blinked and then swallowed. Ginny brushed a long bit of Harry’s unkempt hair out of his eyes, uncovering the hairline lightning bolt scar. “Harry?”
“Sorry, I got distracted…” His voice trailed off, and Ginny thought that if any other man had said such a thing at such a time, she probably would have slapped him; but this was Harry. “It was n…”
“Don’t say that it was nothing Harry.” Ginny cut over him in a firm whisper as she began to methodically brush the fringe away from Harry’s forehead. “It was something. You don’t have to tell me. If you don’t want to talk about it, I understand. But if it has to do with me, I deserve to know.”
Her voice had gotten louder than she had intended as she went. Maybe it was a reaction to the way that he had left things after Dumbledore’s funeral. Maybe it was her frustration that Harry was still, a year after the war was over, shutting her out of some parts of his life. Maybe it was because she was stuck at school again while Harry was out fighting the Dark Wizards and she felt helpless. Or maybe it was simply because she knew that she could help him, be there for him, make his world better if only he would let her.
Harry looked away and Ginny, with wisdom beyond her years, gave him a moment to collect himself. She followed his gaze and saw that he stared off toward a space in the trees where a path led into the Forbidden Forest. Ginny gulped as Harry took a deep breath and let out a long sigh. She knew that he had gone, less that a year ago, into that forest to face Voldemort.
Ginny wasn’t sure if she was ready to hear what Harry may have to say. She was aware of the general course of events of that meeting. She knew that Harry had faced Voldemort and that the dark wizard was unable to kill Harry. Beyond that, she knew very little of what was said or done. She braced herself as Harry looked away and began to speak.
“I saw you, just over there,” Harry pointed vaguely over his shoulder, “as I was walking out into the forest to… well, you know…” He didn’t even look at her to see Ginny nod in understanding. “A part of me, a big part of me, wanted you to somehow know that I was there. Like you did today.”
Ginny moved from above Harry and lay down again at his side. She curled into him, her head on his shoulder and their legs slipping into a comfortable tangle; and she listened.
Ginny listened as Harry told her that he knew that if he stopped to speak to Ginny that he would never have been able to follow that path to his destiny.
She listened as he told her about his fear of the unknown and how he was able to reach out to the one bit of comfort that was left him. Harry spoke of his parents, Lupin and Sirius, the words of comfort they gave him.
She listened, with tears silently streaming down her cheeks, as Harry told her that his parents promised to stay with him until the end, and how they did.
“And at the very end, when I knew that it was all going to be over, I was standing there and he leveled his wand at me,” Ginny held her breath as Harry continued, “And the last thought that sprang into my mind was of you. Your eyes. Your lips against mine.”
Ginny had no words. There was no reply to what Harry had just told her. She just held him close to her, and listened to the miracle that was his heartbeat beneath her ear.
“I have wanted to tell you, about a hundred times since that day. I mean I know it doesn’t make up for the way I ended things. But at least now I think that you know why I did it.” Harry pressed his cheek to Ginny’s forehead. “I mean I really thought that there was no way that we could ever have… well what we have now.”
“A future?” Ginny tilted her head up and Harry met her with a soft quick kiss.
“Yeah.” He breathed the word close against Ginny’s skin, and Harry turned on his side to face her.
“Thanks, Harry.” She met his eyes for the first time since he began telling her his story; they were bright warm and green just like the spring day that surrounded them.
“For what?” Harry looked a little confused and Ginny just smiled at him.
“For telling me. For trusting me. For letting me know that I meant that much to you.” With her free arm, Ginny pulled Harry to her so that the warmth of his body against hers eclipsed that of the sun on her skin.
“You still do.” Harry’s lips pressed against hers and Ginny wanted to burn that feeling into her mind forever. She wanted to lock and keep this afternoon so perfectly that if she watched it in a Pensieve she would not only see, but feel every sensation that she was experiencing.
“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?” Ginny asked after long moments of she and Harry simply holding on to each other. She watched as he looked away and Harry’s cheeks and ears began to turn red with an embarrassed blush.
“Umm, every time that I thought about how to tell you, in my head it always sounded like I was just trying to, umm you know.” Harry let go of Ginny and ran his hand nervously through his hair and shrugged his shoulders.
“No, I don’t. What do you mean?” Ginny raised an eyebrow and stared at him, waiting for an answer. It came out in a rush, but she could still make it out.
“I didn’t want you to think that I was just trying to get into your knickers.” The answer came tumbling out and Harry held his breath after as if he thought Ginny might hit him. She didn’t. Ginny just laughed and then pulled him back to her.
“Oh, Harry, it would take a lot less than that for you to get into my knickers.” Whatever Harry might have had to say to that revelation, was muffled by Ginny’s lips on his.