sigh
The Kinglet's THING today was a trial day at the private school we've been courting. Prospective kids spend a day with their age group as part of the application process - at the moment there aren't any open spots for the fall but we decided to do the trial anyway, to see if he likes it, and how they'd take to him. If all went well we could use it as incentive for him for the next few months, and get him on a waiting list in the meantime.
I kept my head clear of expectations, either way, but the teacher's report made me cry, anyway... secretly, on the way home. while the Kinglet chirped and hummed in the backseat about his day at school.
The teacher reports (surprise surprise) that the Kinglet is obviously quite bright and delightful in many ways, but he refused to follow directions when his own desires were contrary. He had to physically be removed from the playground when recess was over. He repeatedly slapped a little girl about the arms after she and the teacher asked him to stop. He would not help with cleanup at the end of the day, and he ran to the bathroom to hide when it was time to go. This is what the teacher reported. The Kinglet informed me that he also pretended to sleep on the floor (complete with snoring) while the teacher was trying to give a lesson, and he took a little girl's umbrella and ran around the play yard with it until he lost it. When asked why he didn't listen to the teachers (the one thing I admonished him to do when I dropped him off), he said "I didn't feel like it."
I have not spoken yet to the administrator, but from the way the teacher spoke it doesn't sound like they'd be eager to enroll my son should a spot open up. Maybe I'm wrong... I'll wait to hear. Maybe I could campaign on his behalf - but at this moment I'm wondering whether it would even be worth it, with things as they are.
I have determined that the Kinglet really needs to be back in school next year, before the social gap between him and other children widens even further, and his habits become even more ingrained. As much exposure as I've been struggling to give him to others in the homeschool community, it doesn't seem to be enough. He can take them or leave them, and even when he takes them he doesn't grasp the rules of play that other children are fluent in by now. The only cure, I think, is to throw him back in a full-day setting where he has no choice but to... be.
Assuming we could get this or another private school to take him, and assuming we could afford it, I think it's safe to say he won't be able to willing - or able - to rise to the occasion unless we change the game... that is to say, unless we medicate him. Assuming that would work.
So the question becomes, do we give him an opportunity to socialize normally by altering his personality with drugs (assuming it works), or do we protect his still-developing personality but keep him in relative social isolation?
Or the third option: re-enroll him in public school, where they have to take him whether he's medicated or not... but in special ed, and a less-than-stellar social and educational environment by people who are overworked and underpaid.
It feels like the evil of three lessers, if you ask me.
I kept my head clear of expectations, either way, but the teacher's report made me cry, anyway... secretly, on the way home. while the Kinglet chirped and hummed in the backseat about his day at school.
The teacher reports (surprise surprise) that the Kinglet is obviously quite bright and delightful in many ways, but he refused to follow directions when his own desires were contrary. He had to physically be removed from the playground when recess was over. He repeatedly slapped a little girl about the arms after she and the teacher asked him to stop. He would not help with cleanup at the end of the day, and he ran to the bathroom to hide when it was time to go. This is what the teacher reported. The Kinglet informed me that he also pretended to sleep on the floor (complete with snoring) while the teacher was trying to give a lesson, and he took a little girl's umbrella and ran around the play yard with it until he lost it. When asked why he didn't listen to the teachers (the one thing I admonished him to do when I dropped him off), he said "I didn't feel like it."
I have not spoken yet to the administrator, but from the way the teacher spoke it doesn't sound like they'd be eager to enroll my son should a spot open up. Maybe I'm wrong... I'll wait to hear. Maybe I could campaign on his behalf - but at this moment I'm wondering whether it would even be worth it, with things as they are.
I have determined that the Kinglet really needs to be back in school next year, before the social gap between him and other children widens even further, and his habits become even more ingrained. As much exposure as I've been struggling to give him to others in the homeschool community, it doesn't seem to be enough. He can take them or leave them, and even when he takes them he doesn't grasp the rules of play that other children are fluent in by now. The only cure, I think, is to throw him back in a full-day setting where he has no choice but to... be.
Assuming we could get this or another private school to take him, and assuming we could afford it, I think it's safe to say he won't be able to willing - or able - to rise to the occasion unless we change the game... that is to say, unless we medicate him. Assuming that would work.
So the question becomes, do we give him an opportunity to socialize normally by altering his personality with drugs (assuming it works), or do we protect his still-developing personality but keep him in relative social isolation?
Or the third option: re-enroll him in public school, where they have to take him whether he's medicated or not... but in special ed, and a less-than-stellar social and educational environment by people who are overworked and underpaid.
It feels like the evil of three lessers, if you ask me.