Fic: Doctor Patient Confidentiality Chapter 05

[ladyrhyanne]

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Title: Doctor Patient Confidentiality Ch.05

Please see Master Post for fic details.


Jensen stepped under the warm spray of the shower, head feeling heavy and muzzy and memories of the night before mostly a haze of pounding base lines and sliding skin. Really, he just wanted to crawl back into bed and sleep until the dull throbbing behind his eyes went away but resolutely he stayed where he was. Shutting his eyes and lifting his face into the spray he let the water slough away the layer of sweat from his skin.

Turning slowly, he wiped the water from his face and hissed at the burn from the skin at the top of his spine. The sudden pain helped to clear some of the fog from his mind and clearly he could remember that Tristan, Tom, Terry, no Troy, had been a biter during sex. Not that Jensen had complained while being pressed into the wall in the curtained off portion of Heat while Troy had pressed into him from behind and, what the hell was the other guy’s name? something that started with an M, Mark maybe, had kneeled between Jensen and the wall and had sucked him down like pro. And he wasn’t complaining now, a set of teeth marks on his back, he glanced down, and some finger shaped bruises on his hips were worth it.

He had gone to Heat to forget about all the shit twisting around in his head making it hard to function and he had succeeded, at least for a little while. Last night had been all about letting go and just living for the moment and between the booze and the E and two very willing guys it was worth being tired and slightly hung over.

Turning back to face the spray, Jensen leaned over and grabbed the bottle of shampoo, body shivering at the sense memory of being pressed between two bodies on the dance floor as the water slid down his back. He whimpered at the painful twitch from his hard cock and thoughtlessly reached down to run the tip of one finger over the slit, eyes drifting shut as more memories from the night before became clearer.

The sound of the shampoo bottle hitting the bottom of the tub barely registered as he reached out, bracing himself with his left arm against the cool tiles of the shower stall and wrapped the fingers of his other hand around his dick. He had considered hooking up with two men before but last night had been the first time he had gone through with it and it had been amazing. Even before they had slipped into the side room of Heat, just being pressed between them, hot bare skin sliding against his own had made it worth it. He had been pretty sure that not much else could make the shivery feeling from the points of contact of his skin and Troy and Mark’s, as the E had burned through his system, any better. But then he had opened his eyes and glanced over at the couple dancing next to them.

Hand pausing and tightening on his cock, Jensen’s eyes snapped open and a myriad of emotions flashed through him. Jared. It had been Jared and some kid, hips grinding and hands dragging over the other’s body in a parody of fucking to the beat of the music beside them. Shame, embarrassment for being caught like that, jealousy and want coursed had through his body.

Jesus Christ Jared had seen him, seen him practically fucking two guys on the dance floor and instead of turning tail and running, Jensen had gone to him and baited him. Curling himself around Jared’s back like he had the right and taunted him, calling him a naïve kid and shoving his fingers beneath the waistband of Jared’s jeans. He had wanted to push Jared, wanted to see if the kid was all bluff or if he would take Jensen up on the blatant offer.

Unconsciously, his hand started to move over his cock, fingers catching under the head as his thumb swirled around the tip.

God but he had wanted Jared to turn around and pin Jensen against him. Press his lips hard against Jensen’s and demand entrance. He had wanted it to be Jared dragging him into the back room and fucking him stupid.

Jared had gone still in Jensen’s embrace and he had gotten frustrated with how Jared’s hands hadn’t left his partner’s hips even as the back of his head had rested against Jensen’s shoulder. Jensen could take a hint, Jared may have wanted him in theory but he really couldn’t follow through when the offer was on the table and Jensen had abandoned him and gone back to his own partners, letting them lead Jensen into the backroom.

But his mind twisted the memory around, overlaying fantasy over the reality of the night and Jared was turning around, wrapping his long arms around Jensen and pulling them tight together. Pressing kisses along Jensen’s lips then down his neck before biting along his collarbone.

Jensen whimpered and his hand sped up along his cock.

The scene in his mind shifted and suddenly his hand was no longer pressed against the cool, wet tile of the shower but against the tepid, sweating cement block of the backroom of Heat and Jared was pressed all along his back.  Jensen could feel Jared’s fingers dancing along his lower stomach before flicking the button on his jeans and pulling the zipper down, only backing away enough for Jensen to wiggle his hips so that the material fell away and hit the floor. Then he was back, his own jeans gone and his long, because Jared had to be proportional, thick cock pressing against Jensen’s ass.

Turning his face into his braced arm, Jensen unconsciously tilted his ass out, so lost in his fantasy that he had forgotten that it wasn’t real.

“Come on, Jared.” He groaned softly, “Fuck me.”

“You want it Jensen?” Jared’s teeth sharp on the lobe of his ear, “Of course you do. Wanted it from that first day didn’t you? Wanted me to bend you over your pristine desk and fuck you until you screamed.”

“Yes,” Jensen whined, the fingers of the hand holding him up curling as the image of Jared in his mind pressed closer, one of his hands pulling at Jensen’s ass cheek baring him to Jared’s sight.

Fingertip of the other hand just breeching him before pulling back, Jared chuckled as Jensen whined. “Already stretched and lubed, you slut. Did you finger yourself open thinking about me?”

Jensen’s hips shifted back, silently begging for more as he panted harshly into his arm.

“Tell me.” Jared demanded, two fingers sliding in quick and forceful before pulling back out.

“Yes!” He howled, the end of the word shattering into a high keening as Jared shoved his cock in.

“So tight.” Jared growled into his ear. “But good, Jen, so good.”

Jensen’s hand sped up even more on his own cock as he groaned softly, his mind mixing up the sense memory of Troy fucking him hard and the fantasy of Jared being the one doing it instead.

Jared’s fingers were tight on his hips, his teeth breaking the skin at the top of his spine. “Come for me Jensen. Come on my cock the way you’ve been thinking about.”

Jensen’s head snapped back, “Jared!” He hissed through clenched teeth as he shuddered through his orgasm.

Letting his head drop forward, Jensen blinked his eyes open and blurrily watched his come swirl around the drain before vanishing into it and tried to lock his weak knees so that he wouldn’t fall and crack his head open on the edge of the tub. That was all he needed, it would be one thing if he died from it but his luck wasn’t that good. Instead, he’d end up with Tom or, worse, Misha coming to find out what was wrong because Danneel would call one or both of them when he didn’t show up for work and the taunting would never end.

Worse, Jensen would probably be stupid enough because of being concussed to admit to whom he was thinking about when he jerked off in the first place. Then he would have to explain who Jared was and why Jensen hadn’t fucked him yet or was ever going to.

He groaned and let his head drop between his shoulders as he pressed his free hand against the tiles. Jared might not have been the one who had fucked him last night but he had been at Heat. That much hadn’t been a fantasy and now Jensen was going to have to face him that afternoon for their session.

How in the hell was he supposed to get through that? He couldn’t very well tell the kid about how Jensen was at the end of his rope because of Jared and worrying that Christian was going to make an unwanted appearance in his life because of that fucking jacket and he just needed an escape. Fuck, had Jared realized that Jensen had been fucked up on something other than booze? And that paled compared to the fact that Jensen had actually wrapped himself around Jared and had baited him, trying to get a rise out of the kid. Trying to get him to take control and just take Jensen any damn way he wanted.

Carefully, Jensen reached down and picked up his abandoned shampoo bottle from the bottom of the tub and poured more into his hand before setting down on the tub ledge.

And he was pretty sure that Jared wouldn’t have taking to being taunted very well at all. Shit, he had called him a naïve kid and told him to go home. Hell of a way for going about getting Jared to trust him and confide in him when Jensen had pretty much called him a stupid child.

Fuck.

Guilt laid heavy in his stomach and he had to swallow down the bile that threatened at the back of his throat. Jensen was going to have to figure out a way to tell Jared that he didn’t think of Jared as just some stupid child but he was at a loss as to how to go about that. It wasn’t like he could just come out and tell Jared that he had only said what he had said because he had wanted Jared to prove him wrong. Admitting that would mean he would have to admit that he felt more for Jared than he should, then was fucking legal.

Goddamnit but he had fucked up good this time.

Rubbing the thick liquid into his hair, Jensen shuddered; vainly hoping that Jared wouldn’t show up for his session that afternoon even as it made something in his chest ache.



When Jared awoke the next morning it took him a second to remember why he felt so bad. Then, things ticked into place, the club, seeing Jensen, Jensen seeing him and Chad. He had pulled that little (possibly immature) stunt hoping to get Jensen’s attention, get a rise out of him. And he had. Jared rolls over onto his back and closes his eyes tight. Jensen had put an arm around him, touched him. What had Jared done? Not one damn thing. Too frozen in shock to do anything, for all his brash, blatant, advances he hadn’t been able to do a goddamn thing but lay his head back and muttered…something. Fuck. Jensen had offered Jared exactly what he wanted; all he had been dreaming of last night and he had been too paralyzed to do anything about it. Maybe he was just a “naive little boy”.

Jared sighed, opened his eyes, and sat up, scrubbing a hand over his face, rough with stubble, and looked over at his clock.

Shit. He was late.

Jared got out of bed, much as he didn’t want to, and trudged over to his closet and absently pulled out some jeans and a t-shirt before heading out of his room down the hall and into the bathroom.

Just as he was turning on the water a knock came at the door.

“Jared?” His father’s voice. They must have come home from visiting with Nichole and her family sometime early this morning.

“I know, I know. I’m late,” he said sharply.

“Your mother and I are going to take Jeff to the hospital. Now, Jared,” his voice went even more stern. “I’m going to trust you to get yourself to school and to your appointment with Dr. Ackles. Jeff said that you behaved yourself last night and the two of you had a nice talk.”

Jared stood still for a moment. Yes, he and Jeff had had a nice talk last night, Jeff had let him go out no questions asked, and even offered him comfort when he was upset and crying.

“Yeah. We did. I’ll…I’ll get to school and to Dr. Ackles’.”

Jared could practically hear his father’s nod. “All right then.”

Jared showered quickly and dressed even quicker, and hurried out the door.

When he closed the front door behind him he was surprised to see Chad’s Mustang waiting for him, with Sandy in her usual place in the backseat. Chad had sunglasses over his eyes, though the morning was cloudy. Jared guesses his friend is probably hung over…after four Screaming Orgasms, three Blowjobs, and a Slow Comfortable Screw. Jared himself was not hung over, but he had not drank as much as Chad. Sandy looked like her usual perky self, but as far as Jared knew, she only had half of an Appletini.

“Hey guys,” Jared said softly, abashed, head down. He had lashed out at his friends with no just cause last night, and now he knew he had to apologize.

“Dude…” Chad whispered. “Quiet. Slayer is playing in my head.”

“ARE THEY TAKING REQUESTS?” Sandy shouted and giggled madly.

“SHUT UP!” Chad shouted back and groaned loudly holding his blonde head in his hands, slumping over the worn leather steering wheel.

Jared gave a laugh, and Sandy winked up at him.

“Tell her to shut up, Jay,” Chad said, voice muffled as he still kept his face hidden in his folded arms.

Jared looked between his friends, at Sandy. She was smiling and no hint of hurt or anger in her face. She looked back up at him and smiled. Jared nodded and smiled back before hopping into the passenger seat of Chad’s clunker.

“TELL SLAYER I WANNA HEAR DISCIPLE!” Jared shouted and slapped Chad upside the head.

“Oh, I hate you, Padalecki.” Chad moaned.

Jared and Sandy laughed. Everything was good.



“Thanks, dude,” Jared said as Chad pulled his car to a stop outside the building Dr. Ackles’ office was housed in. Sandy was staying afterschool for Drama Club so it was the two of them.

Chad’s hang over had worn off a little after lunch and he was back to his usual self. “No prob, dude. This is gonna be fun for you, huh?” Chad asked looking uncharacteristically sympathetic.

Jared sighed and raked a hand through his hair. “How the hell am I supposed to go in there?”

Chad shrugged and shook his head. “Don’t know, Jay. Wanna not go?”

“No,” Jared said immediately. He had thought briefly of blowing off the appointment with Jensen, but that would be showing weakness and Jensen already thought he was a little boy, turning tail and hiding would only add credence to that theory and Jared had resolved, around third period, that he was gonna show Jensen he was wrong. He was a man and he was gonna conduct himself like a man, and men didn’t run away.

Chad gave a nod. “Well, get goin’ then, or you’ll be late.”

Jared nodded. “Keep my pack for me?” Jared said motioning to his backpack on the floor.

Chad nodded and raised his brows, eyes flicking over towards the revolving door to the building.

“I get it. I’m going,” Jared leaned forward and pressed a kiss to Chad’s cheek and received one in return.

“It’ll be fine, Jay,” Chad said.

Jared gave a small smile, and hopped out of the car. He waved as Chad pulled off.

Jared took the elevator up to the 9th floor, stomach clenching nervously the closer he got to Jensen’s office. How did you act when you saw your therapist practically fucking two guys on the dance floor of a hardcore gay club? Would Jensen bring it up? Would he scold Jared for being at the club? Would Jensen mention his behavior last night?

The elevator came to a halt and Jared stepped out, walked down the hall and paused again in front of the door to Dr. Ackles’ office. He looked at the little plaque that said “Jensen Ackles PH.D” next to the door, plastic and burgundy with white letters. He looked at the words written underneath in Braille, killing time, gathering his courage. He took a deep breath and put a hand on the knob, twisting it, and pushing the heavy door open. The outer office was empty but for the red-headed receptionist and a woman flipping through a magazine.

Jared nodded to Danneel and she smiled back cordially, before taking a seat and bouncing his leg nervously.

Ten minutes had passed before the door the Jensen’s office had opened and out came another patient. The woman flipping through the magazine stood and the pair walked out.

Jared found it odd that Jensen hadn’t escorted his patient out. Jensen was probably ashamed and embarrassed about his behavior the previous night. A couple of more minutes ticked by before the buzzer on the intercom sounded.

Danneel smiled over at Jared. "Dr. Ackles will see you now."

It didn't escape Jared's notice that it had taken more time than normal for him to call his receptionist and tell her to send Jared in.

Jared stood and walked to the door, took a deep breath and let it out as he twisted knob and entered.

Jensen glanced up briefly as his door opened and felt his heart thud painfully in his chest at the way Jared’s eyes flitted around the office not acting like his usual cocky, swaggering self. Repressing a sigh, Jensen glanced down at Jared's open file before him, not really seeing it, but using it as a buffer between them. His stomach rolled and he had to swallow down the rising nausea.   Jensen wonders if by his irresponsible actions last night if he had shattered the professional boundaries and uneasy trust between them the moment he put his hands of the young man, had quite possibly pushed Jared past his comfort zone.

"Jared," he cleared his throat nervously and forced his gaze up, catching on Jared slumped in the chair, looking at everything but Jensen. "I need to apologize for my behavior last night. It...it was out of line and..."

He tangled his fingers together, hoping to hide how his hands were shaking, and rested them on the open file, feeling the paper stick to the sweaty digits. "You need to know..." he huffed out a breath; this was the hardest thing he had ever had to do, harder then when he had come out to his parents, harder than when he had been the one to end it with Christian instead of just waiting for Christian to walk out of his life, again. "I know you're not...I know you're smart, Jared, your parents raved about it when they first filled out my questionnaire. I...what I meant...I didn't..."   Sighing again, Jensen pulled his glass off and pinched the bridge of his nose, the tension headache that had been threatening since he had gotten to the office finally blossoming behind his eyes.

He didn't know what to say, this was as far as he had gotten when trying to figure out how to apologize to Jared. It wasn't like he could tell the kid the truth, "Yeah, Jared, so sorry for being a prick last night, wasn't really my intention. See I kind of have a thing for you and I went to Heat to try to help me deal with it and when I saw you there with that guy I got jealous and wanted to hurt and bait you into doing something at the same time. And I'm a dick and I'm really, really sorry so can we just forget the whole thing?" definitely wasn't the way to go. But he had no idea what to say that wouldn't end up with him saying more than he should.

Jared watched as Dr. Ackles struggled to apologize, knew the older man was uncomfortable, and part of Jared, the hurt and childish part of him, wanted to watch Jensen continue to squirm.

Jared forced himself to push down that spiteful immature part of himself. “It’s okay, Dr. Ackles,” Jared began, heart pounding. “We both caught each other in a compromising position.  I’m sorry, too.” Jared said proud of how adult, calm, he sounded.

Jensen’s lips twisted in a scowl, “My actions in regard to you were way out of line.” He sighed hard, “I shouldn’t have touched…” Shouldn’t have touched. Shouldn’t have baited. Definitely shouldn’t feel the way I do. “Look, I’m sorry.”

Jared felt his lips curl into a smile but saw that Jensen was obviously uncomfortable with this whole situation and before he would have used it against him, but now Jared wanted Jensen to see him differently. His smile falls and he inclines his head. “Okay.”

It was acceptance but the way Jared looked left Jensen feeling like there was something more he should say and he knew why but he couldn’t. He might have let himself get really fucking stupid the night before and had left Jared an opening big enough for a semi to be driven through but that was last night. Today, he was back in control and his screwed up obsession for the kid was back where it belonged, locked down tight where it couldn’t hurt either of them.

He tried a smile of his own, shaky as it was and managed to hold it long enough to meet Jared’s eyes before the kid looked away again. Dropping the pretense that anything had really been solved between them, Jensen looked back down at the file, actually looking at it, casting around for something to say that would get them back on track as Doctor and patient.

“So have you heard from your brother…?” He fell silent as the phone on his desk started to ring. Danneel knew better than to disturb him when he had a patient and usually it would piss him off but for once he didn’t mind so much. As terrible as it was, it got him out of trying to deal with the thick tension between him and Jared. “Sorry.” He muttered catching Jared’s eye as he lifted the receiver and pressed it to his ear. “Yes?”

“I’m really sorry Dr. Ackles, I told him you were in with a patient but he says it’s an emergency.”

Danneel sounded flustered and worried and between her words and her tone, his own fear spiked. Someone was calling and insisting on speaking to him, saying it was an emergency. Specifically a “him” and “him” could be so many people, first and foremost his brother, Josh calling to say something had happened to one or both of their parents or what if it was Misha or Mike calling to say Tom had been hurt on duty, or maybe Tom calling to tell him that something had happened to Misha?

“Who’s calling Danneel?” He forced past a suddenly dry throat.

“A mister Kane.”

Jensen’s stomach plummeted and he had to stifle a groan. With all the worry he had been doing about seeing Jared today, he had completely forgotten about worrying that Christian might contact him because Tom had dropped off his jacket to him the night before. And the day just keeps getting better and better. He thought sarcastically and shut his eyes.

For the first time since Danneel had finally gotten the hang of how things worked in the office, Jensen found himself desperately missing Sophia. She had been the woman he had hired to be his secretary when he first started his practice and was there through the monstrous four months that he and Christian tried to be a couple for the last time. She would have known that Christian claiming an emergency would have been bullshit and just let him sit on hold until he got fed up and hung up. But Danneel didn’t know Jensen’s history, it wasn’t like it had ever occurred to him to say anything to her after Christian swore he would never contact Jensen again because Jensen was “throwing away a good thing”, plus it really wasn’t any of her business.

Risking a quick glance at Jared and finding him watching Jensen carefully, he groaned silently. There was no way that he would take a call from anybody during a session unless there was a real emergency but doubly so was there was no way in hell he was speaking with Christian especially with Jared in the room. Like Jensen hadn’t already proven just how fucked up he was the night before, he wasn’t making it worse by talking with Christian now.

“Tell him that I told you to take a message and that I’ll call him back.”

It wasn’t like Jensen was really going to call Christian but hopefully it would be enough for Christian to stop harassing Danneel.

Jared watched Jensen closely during that conversation. He saw the color drain from Jensen’s face, heard the slight tremor in his voice and wanted to know just what the hell was going on. What or who was upsetting Jensen, but more than that he wants to know what he can do to make Jensen feel better, make those green eyes shine with warmth and laughter. Jensen sees Jared watching and Jensen looks away, almost guiltily, and something inside Jared uncurls; an anger and possessiveness that he has never felt before. Maybe it was one of those assholes Jared had seen Jensen dancing with the other night. Maybe it was their idea of a fun little interlude to call the doc while he was in session for a little impromptu phone sex.

“Problem?” Jared asked, anger and…something else thrumming under his skin.

Letting the receiver drop back into the cradle, Jensen shook his head. “No, no problem.” Good God but he was such a liar.

“Oh.” Jared tilted his head and his eyes narrowed just slightly, “One of your friends from last night then?” Jared asked, that unfamiliar emotion drowning out the anger.

He had to be imagining the jealousy he heard in Jared’s voice. Anger he could accept, if maybe Jared was pissed that Jensen had rebuked his advances during their sessions but then again he had rebuked Jensen the night before so fair was fair but not jealously. Jealously suggested that Jared wanted more than to get into Jensen’s pants and that just wasn’t possible. What could Jensen possibly offer someone like Jared that would make him feel anything real towards him? Nothing, that’s what. What he thought he had detected in Jared’s voice was nothing more than the twisted little part of him looking for something that wasn’t there.

Still, he felt the need to defend himself, at least, a little. He didn’t like Jared thinking that what he had seen last night was what Jensen was like all the time. He knew it shouldn’t matter but it did.

“No.” He crossed his arms over his desk and clutched at his own arms with shaking fingers. “I don’t usually…” He huffed out a breath before barreling on, best to get it over with quickly, not keep dragging it out because this was getting ridiculous. “What you saw last night, Jared? I’m not usually like that. I’m not going to lie, I’m a healthy twenty-six year old and I do get laid but not that often and never like that before.”

Which was pretty much the truth. Maybe he did get laid more often than he alluded to but not so much that he felt bad for what he had said. And it had been the first time he had ever had sex with two guys at the same time. It was important that Jared understood that.

Jared fought the eye roll that was dying to get out, but knew that would just add fuel to Jensen’s feeling that he was just a “naive little boy”. Instead he counted to ten and took a breath. He felt that unnamed emotion inside his chest go back to sleep. He licked his lips and found Jensen’s eyes again, but his psychologist seemed…off. He believed Jensen when he said that it wasn’t the guys he was with at Heat. But the way Jensen was acting now Jared was damned curious to know what had gotten under Jensen’s skin so completely in such a short period of time.

“So,” Jared began attempting to put things back on the right track, professional track. “Before…you were gonna ask about my brother?”

Jared watched as Jensen looked back down at his file. “Uhh, yeah.” Jensen said distractedly. “Have…have you had any contact with him?”

“Yeah,” Jared said with a nod. “His wife’s aunt was taken to the hospital last night…Mom and Dad took Megan and rushed to their side.” Jared hated the note of bitterness and fully expected Dr. Ackles to call him on it. He looked at Jensen saw the man holding his chin in between his thumb and forefinger and seemed to be staring off into space, eyes clouded with uncertainty and maybe even pain.

Jared tilts his head to the side brows coming together in a deep frown. “Jensen?” Jared inwardly cursed at himself for addressing the doctor so informally. “Dr. Ackles? He asked again. “Is everything okay? I mean…I don’t want to intrude, but that…was that phone call bad news?”

It took a second before Jensen’s eyes found Jared’s and a few more seconds before Jensen spoke. “No. Not bad news. Your brother? Did you,” Jensen looked around almost looking lost before licking his lips and running a hand down his face. He cleared his throat before turning his attention to Jared. “Did you and he hash things out then?”

Jared wanted to know what the hell was going on with Jensen. It was clear there was something weighing heavily on his mind. Jared swallowed down the urge to get up, wrap his hands around Jens’s biceps and make the man tell him what was wrong. Instead, he bit back the petulant huff and pressed on even though it was obvious that Jensen was not into this session anymore.

“We had a good talk. He said he loves me and accepts me,” Jared smiles at that, heart feeling light and happy. “I can’t tell you how good that made me feel. Hearing that from someone in the family. Gives me hope.” Jared smiled and looked expectantly at this therapist but the green-eyed man just nodded absently.

Jared tried a few more times to engage Jensen in professional conversation but the man always gave short answers and asked none of his usual more probing questions and offered no advice.

It made Jared’s heart heavy, Jensen had rejected him at the club the previous night, dismissed him as just a child, and now he wasn’t even treating Jared like a patient. When Jared-not Jensen-noticed his hour was up he got slowly to his feet, once more feeling like crying, and really, what the hell was up with that? He faced Jensen, made the older man catch and hold his intense gaze.

“Just so you know, Jensen. What you saw at the club and the way I have acted in here isn’t the real me. I’m a man, Jensen, whether you believe it or not, and I can conduct myself as one.” Jared gave Jensen a hard look before he turned and walked out of the office without a backwards glace.



Jensen’s jaw dropped open in shock as he watched Jared walk out of the room. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?” He muttered before rubbing his hands over his face.

It could and probably did have something to do with what Jensen had said to Jared the night before or maybe the way he had been acting like the kid throughout their session. Jensen could admit that he wasn’t at his best but what the hell was Jared expecting of him. He had molested and propositioned him on the dance floor the night before. And he was supposed to be the adult who fucking knew better.

He let his head fall to his desk and only winced a little when his forehead made contact. Maybe Jared could conduct himself as an adult, at least that way one of them could.

Rolling his head, he looked up at the phone sitting on the edge of his desk and groaned. It was Friday, Friday meant TGIF, which meant Misha and Tom and Mike and Vicky. No way in hell was he up for that tonight. Not after the day he had just had. He was going to have to call Misha and beg off for the first time in months and hope that telling his friend that he had too much paperwork to do would fly.

Sitting up, he reached for the phone, it might work, so long as Tom hadn’t gotten in touch with Misha yet and told him about the whole jacket fiasco. If he had, Jensen’s goose was cooked because Misha was going to think that Jensen not wanting to go had something to do with Christian and he would probably end up with all four of them over at his apartment even before he managed to get home.



Jared closed the door to Dr. Ackles’ office softly behind him, full of hurt and confusion. Last night Jensen had been all over him, damn near propositioned him and now he seemed to be treating Jared like less than a patient, like a stranger, like he wasn’t important. That hurt the most of all. Jared barely noticed the stocky long-haired man standing and making a beeline for Jensen’s office, the acrid smell of cigarettes following him.

“Mr. Kane!” Danneel said shrilly standing up behind her desk. “You can’t go in there.”

For a second it occurs to Jared to charge in after the strange man, wondering if he was perhaps the father of another one of Jensen’s patients, and was maybe a little disgruntled and meant to do harm to Jensen. Jared paused momentarily with his hand on the knob of the door that lead out of the reception area and listened to Danneel’s frantic one-sided conversation with Dr. Ackles.

“I’m so sorry, Dr. Ackles. He just…yes….Are you sure?” Pause. “Okay, then.” She sounded relieved and Jared heard her set the phone down.

Jared’s heart settled down and he shook his head. That guy was probably Jensen’s boyfriend or something.   Jared rolls his eyes. If that short, longhaired guy was Jensen’s boyfriend, Jensen clearly had crappy taste in guys.



“No, it’s fine Danneel. If you’re done for the day why don’t you just head out.”

Jensen couldn’t take his eyes off Christian, as he crossed the room to settle in the chair across the desk from Jensen as he distantly heard Danneel say something before the line went dead in his ear. Slowly he let the receiver drop back to the cradle and let his hands drop to his lap to hide their shaking. He knew Christian had been trying to get a hold of him but he hadn’t thought that he would just show up and barge into Jensen’s office, not when Jensen had made it clear that he didn’t want to see Christian again.

And yet, he couldn’t say that he was surprised. He had been worrying that Christian would take getting the jacket back as an invitation for conversation between them. He only wished he was wrong.

“What can I do for you Christian?”

Christian smirked, his blue eyes sparkling in a way that used to make Jensen’s breath quicken but now only made a sense of foreboding tighten his shoulders.

“I wanted to thank you for returning my jacket. I’ve been wondering what had happened to it for a while.”

Bullshit. Jensen thought angrily but kept the word locked tight in his chest. It had taken a long time for Jensen to admit that he had been lying to himself about Christian not having a tell when he lied but he was honest with himself now. The muscle at the corner of Christian’s right eye twitched, just once, when he lied and it had done so.

“Well I’m glad I found it then.” He waved a hand over Jared’s open file on his desk and was pleased when it only trembled slightly. “Now as I’m sure you can see, I have work to get caught up on so if you would be so kind as to let yourself out.”

“Ah come on, Jen.” Christian’s lips twisted into a playful frown, “I come all the way down here to thank you, you could at least give me a couple minutes of your time.”

Why did he even bother when he knew it wasn’t going to be that easy? Steeling himself, Jensen settled both elbows on his desk and threaded his fingers together, using his curled hands in front of his face as a kind of buffer between them.

“What do you want Christian?” He sighed.

He shrugged off-handedly but Jensen knew that Christian never did anything without first thinking it through.

“To thank you.”

“You’ve done that.” He kept his tone level, refusing to admit that Christian was getting any kind of rise out of him, even if it was annoyance. If Christian knew, he would push and push until he had Jensen so twisted up that he didn’t know what way was up.

“Let me take you to dinner.”

It wasn’t a question; hell it wasn’t even a suggestion. Christian said it like it was a foregone conclusion that that was what was going to happen.

Fuck no.

He forced a tight smile, “TGIF.”

Christian rolled his eyes, “Are you guys still doing that? Aren’t you a little old?”

A little old to spend time with friends? Hardly. But Jensen kept that to himself too, it wasn’t like this wasn’t one of his and Christian’s oldest arguments and he refused to be baited into any kind of discussion with his ex.

“Guess not.”

He sighed and shook his head, “Come on Jensen, no strings I promise. Just dinner.”

“Got plans.”

A part of him felt like a bastard for acting like, well a bastard, but this was Christian he was dealing with and if Jensen gave even an inch, Christian would push for a mile.

“Then let me take you dancing after dinner. You love dancing.”

He was not going to let this go and Jensen didn’t want to have to keep dealing with Christian calling or popping up whenever the urge took him to do so. So he would go dancing with him only if Christian agreed to take him to “Heat”. Not because of the kind of place that it was but because it was on the other side of town from “Cues” and no way in hell would Tom and Mike stumble into them there. Plus, he knew Christian didn’t actually like to dance and if Jensen insisted on a gay club, a gay club with a reputation like “Heat” had, maybe he’d give up.

Not likely, but there was always the chance.

“Fine. I’ll meet you in front of “Heat” at eleven tonight.”

Christian chewed on his bottom lip, “Heat?”

Jensen shrugged, “You want to go dancing then that’s where we go.”

“Fine.” He shrugged like it was no big deal, “But I pick you up at your place at ten thirty.”

Jensen groaned inwardly, he didn’t need Christian knowing where he lived but on the other hand it wasn’t like his name wasn’t in the phone book so he wasn’t really hiding. “Fine. Let me give you the address.”

As Jensen scribbled down the address to his apartment he ignored the smirk of triumph on Christian’s face. His ex might think he had won something here but the truth of the matter was that Jensen knew that the club would be busy tonight and if Christian got to be too much then Jensen could just slip into the crowd.

Besides, there was always the chance that he was over reacting and reading into this way too much. Perhaps Christian really was only trying to thank him in his own way and Jensen should be adult enough to appreciate it.

At least that way he could look at himself in the mirror and not be lying when he said to himself that he was an adult.



Chapter 04 / Chapter 06