Sometimes.
Sometimes, I post really emo posts to LJ because most of you don't know me in real life. I usually let them sit on here for a while and then delete them when I come to my senses later. This would be one of those posts.
Writing is hard right now. Not because the words won't come because I could fake it (and if you have seen the couple of fics I have written that will never see the light of day, you would agree) but my heart isn't in it right now. Very rarely do I find myself depressed these days. A lot of good things have happened to me over the last few years. But that doesn't stop the way my brain sometimes works.
The thing is that the stuff I find myself getting upset over are not the things that I would ever normally consider, much less spend waking and some sleeping hours thinking about. Which makes me wonder. Is it because 30 is looming around the corner and I am having some sort of crisis? I doubt that because I have no problem with getting older. Is it because I am once again feeling that I have not accomplished enough? Well, that is always a possibility, especially when I see what other people have. Though, that brings me back to the thinking about things that never touched me before.
Dear head. Where are you these days? You're making me cry. Please stop. Love, C.
Writing is hard right now. Not because the words won't come because I could fake it (and if you have seen the couple of fics I have written that will never see the light of day, you would agree) but my heart isn't in it right now. Very rarely do I find myself depressed these days. A lot of good things have happened to me over the last few years. But that doesn't stop the way my brain sometimes works.
The thing is that the stuff I find myself getting upset over are not the things that I would ever normally consider, much less spend waking and some sleeping hours thinking about. Which makes me wonder. Is it because 30 is looming around the corner and I am having some sort of crisis? I doubt that because I have no problem with getting older. Is it because I am once again feeling that I have not accomplished enough? Well, that is always a possibility, especially when I see what other people have. Though, that brings me back to the thinking about things that never touched me before.
Dear head. Where are you these days? You're making me cry. Please stop. Love, C.