i don't know what this is.
I'm sorry.
I'm your Annie Hall-
Here in my head, I'm thinking about it all over again.
I was listening to a song and the words,
"Go to him. Stay with him. But be prepared to bleed"-
Got trapped in my head.
Next to the dusty old photograph of you, smiling there.
And I'm not exactly sure whether to call, write or type-
Because it's smothering, this care and want is a blanket
I'm stumbling...
My social behavior is dead.
I was afraid of this, you know.
Peeling myself until I was so naked-
That you realized it.
So elusive, you know.
This game of hide and go seek,
"Go to him. Stay with him. But be prepared to bleed"-
Just before we all got lost, I stared onto a long canvas of blue
Wondering what I was going to do.
I'm drowning in that silk stretched sea, it's clawing me.
Staying with a ghost is hard, they're transparent and fade.
Wraiths are never too sentimental, they're never anything but dreams.
Diaphonous things with pillow lips, liars to meet my screams.
Are you watching me from behind the silver screen?
Do you see my Kali, a little girl who hid behind everything she could.
She's emerging from the waters, she's vulnerable.
Are you enjoying this? Watching this. Watching a venerable decay.
Where are your damned things? Where is your strength? Where are your
Soft words. Did they take them away with my precious sanity when they hauled you away in the van?
"She said, go to him. Stay with him. But be prepared to bleed."
She said, talk to him.Just talk to him. Don't leave anything out.
Somehow, I thought you strong like those adamantine chains,
But as soon as something more powerful than you comes along-
You're running scared.
Where's my brilliance?
This supposed light shining, a quick wit, a quick mind
Is there beauty, underneath all those scratches-
Is there anything more?
I am Persephone, in the underworld, hiding in the dark.
I thought you an angel, a toxic angel-
But my idealizing is done.
Can you see all my tears? I am running, running down
The devil's road. I am dancing, just rejoicing that I can live another day.
I said I need you, you said you like that. You'd go down another path.
Maybe it's personal, probably personal-
But it's the thing that destroyed me.
I'm trying to keep it, because I need it. Keep the lid shut.
Pandora's box is my treasure, you're my hope-
It's a lonely world and you're escaping me
I'm standing on the edge, waiting, looking into the pool.
I remember Joni saying-
"Go to him. Stay with him, but be prepared to bleed."
And I lay back into the grass, with all my alabaster shards looking up into
The light.
You are up there, in that sky, where the beautiful things are.
Just before it all got lost, I was wondering where the edge was.
Now I've found it, I want to escape the desolation it brings.
They come near and and exit far, with the consistency of the northern star.
Suffer vertigo, from staying too long, standing too close to me.
I am etherized, dead within their eyes, lost cause something to give up on.
I don't have faith in many things, I don't have trust in much,
It's those cynical things that I believe in, that push me up.
There are a few things that I believe in, and you're among the few.
Perhaps stupidity, perhaps blindness
The fold upon my eyes.
Joni Mitchell said,
"Go to him. Stay with him. But be prepared to bleed."