Very British Problems
The supermarket I usually use has a "baskets only" lane, but doesn't specify how many items you can have. I naively assumed that all express lanes were the same, but found out to my cost that they were not. On my first visit to the supermarket across the park from where I now work, I joined the express lane with 11 items, only to get sternly told by the assistant that it was strictly ten items or fewer. She made me put everything back in the basket and join another queue.
Today I had 10 items, so decided to risk it again. There were 4 people ahead of me in the queue. However, it turned out that one of them, although he had only 3 items, had forgotten about the whole concept of paying, and when asked for money, embarked on slow but laborious search of every possible bag or pocket, in search of his wallet. Another was doing something long and complicated involving exchanging stickers for knives. The sight of knives on the conveyor belt caused someone behind me to say, "She's got a knife!" and run away to the trolley aisle on the grounds that it would quicker. The other 2 people had 12 items, so had split them into two groups, and paid for them in two separate transactions, thus taking quite a lot longer than they'd have taken had the system allowed them to go through with 12. (I consider this Cheating, and grumped silently about it in the queue behind them.) ("Have you got a loyalty card?" they were both asked on transcation 1, and said no. "Have you got a loyalty card?" they were both asked again on transaction 2, on the off-chance that they'd just acquired one by magic. Clearly this is a shop that believes in Rules and Scripts, and neither can be departed from.)
Anyway, it seems to me that the important thing in an express lane is the amount of time you take going through, not the number of items you have. I therefore propose that express lanes start labelling themselves as "no more than 90 seconds per person," or something like that. Of course, shop assistants vary very much in their speed, so each assistant would have to have a speed rating, and extra seconds would be added (or taken away) from the 90 seconds accordingly. It's only fair. Also, delays that are Not Your Fault (barcodes that don't read etc.) will result in the automatic pausing of the stopwatch.
The problem comes with deciding how to penalise those who exceed their time. After all, the time limit is most likely to be reached after they've bagged their items up, but before they've paid, so it's not the shop's interest to have the assistant say, "sorry, your 90 seconds are up. Please take your bags and leave." Cancelling all the purchases, and making them take everything out of their bags and go back and queue again is clearly not an option, since it would only cause even more waiting for the people behind in the queue. I think the best solution is to fine everyone who overruns. If they've not yet reached the point of being asked for money, £1 can be added to their bill, but if they're half way through paying, they'll have to put £1 in a collecting box. It would also be nice to reward super-quick shoppers with something, too: perhaps points on a card, which they can collect to redeem for nice things.
Today I had 10 items, so decided to risk it again. There were 4 people ahead of me in the queue. However, it turned out that one of them, although he had only 3 items, had forgotten about the whole concept of paying, and when asked for money, embarked on slow but laborious search of every possible bag or pocket, in search of his wallet. Another was doing something long and complicated involving exchanging stickers for knives. The sight of knives on the conveyor belt caused someone behind me to say, "She's got a knife!" and run away to the trolley aisle on the grounds that it would quicker. The other 2 people had 12 items, so had split them into two groups, and paid for them in two separate transactions, thus taking quite a lot longer than they'd have taken had the system allowed them to go through with 12. (I consider this Cheating, and grumped silently about it in the queue behind them.) ("Have you got a loyalty card?" they were both asked on transcation 1, and said no. "Have you got a loyalty card?" they were both asked again on transaction 2, on the off-chance that they'd just acquired one by magic. Clearly this is a shop that believes in Rules and Scripts, and neither can be departed from.)
Anyway, it seems to me that the important thing in an express lane is the amount of time you take going through, not the number of items you have. I therefore propose that express lanes start labelling themselves as "no more than 90 seconds per person," or something like that. Of course, shop assistants vary very much in their speed, so each assistant would have to have a speed rating, and extra seconds would be added (or taken away) from the 90 seconds accordingly. It's only fair. Also, delays that are Not Your Fault (barcodes that don't read etc.) will result in the automatic pausing of the stopwatch.
The problem comes with deciding how to penalise those who exceed their time. After all, the time limit is most likely to be reached after they've bagged their items up, but before they've paid, so it's not the shop's interest to have the assistant say, "sorry, your 90 seconds are up. Please take your bags and leave." Cancelling all the purchases, and making them take everything out of their bags and go back and queue again is clearly not an option, since it would only cause even more waiting for the people behind in the queue. I think the best solution is to fine everyone who overruns. If they've not yet reached the point of being asked for money, £1 can be added to their bill, but if they're half way through paying, they'll have to put £1 in a collecting box. It would also be nice to reward super-quick shoppers with something, too: perhaps points on a card, which they can collect to redeem for nice things.