Title: Permanence in All Its Forms
Spoilers: None. AU Future-fic. Set within the 'Optimal' series after 'Supply Run.'
Rating: PG-13, R
Word Count: 1258
Disclaimer: 不是矿
Author's Notes: Here's the grown up bunny. Not really associated with the baby bunny. These websites were very helpful with research:
Tattoos That Say 'I'm A Futuristic Bad-Ass' and
Science Tattoo Emporium. I'm evening_shadow on twitter if anyone wants to follow me. Occasionally, I send pleas into the ether for beta readers or post little bits that occur to me. Thanks to
renisanz for always answering that plea. Comment if you like.
Asleep on the couch after a difficult shift, she is using him for a pillow, her arms folded across his lap, her head nestled in the crook of her elbow. It is not very comfortable for him and he is unable to reach his laptop from this position. Yet, it still feels new, even after all this time, the warmth of her against him, the permission to let his hands wander where they will. He loves touching her, loves feeling the texture of her skin against his fingertips, loves hearing the little noises she makes. He also loves it when she is asleep like this and he can study her to his exacting specifications.
His hand naturally drifts to her lower back, slipping beneath her shirt to lie flat against her skin. His fingers curling around her hip, she sighs in her sleep and snuggles closer. Her tattoo is under his palm and he always feels like he should be able to detect it by touch alone. There’s no difference in the smoothness of her skin and without looking, he wouldn’t be able to tell that she is branded by ink.
He’s fascinated by her tattoo. Previously, he never understood the desire to permanently mark your body with a symbol that may only hold meaning at the present stage of life. It made sense for those in dangerous occupations, where other means of identification would be necessary, but the average person had no need for a tattoo. Besides, with the elasticity of human skin, what was a frolicking dolphin today would be nothing more than a misshapen blue blob tomorrow. He knows all of this and he is still fascinated by it.
The location, the small of her back, would classify it as a ‘tramp stamp’ (he’s done research), but she said she wanted something small just for her. When he asked her why she chose an area where she wouldn’t be able to see without a mirror, she smiled and said faith meant believing without seeing. His mother certainly made sure he was well-versed in all aspects of religion, stopping just short of forcing him to attend Bible study. Still, as he grew up, science took God’s place as the source of all knowledge.
It was one more difference between them, the idea of trusting in something you could never prove, and it would be quite annoying in anyone else. With her, it was simply part of her, like the tattoo. He’s slowly beginning to realize that she will continue to surprise him. She is his very own Higgs boson, mysterious, undefined with a huge impact on her surroundings.
She is the only one he knows who has a tattoo. There appears to be a ‘cool reputation’ prerequisite for a tattoo that many in his current peer group don’t possess. He can, however, think of many examples within the science fiction genre. There was Chakotay from Star Trek Voyager with his familial tribal facial markings. Dana Scully is shown getting a tattoo of an Ouroboros, representing the futility she feels in her life. The Third Doctor from the Classic Dr. Who episodes had a cobra on his forearm, the only incarnation with a tattoo. Internet speculation postulated that it was a brand from the Time Lords to mark the Doctor’s exile. There were other examples, but he kept thinking of the tattoos from Battlestar Galactica. More specifically, the ones worn by Starbuck and Anders. Alone, they were artistic, but when they embraced, the tattoos formed one design. It was meant to commemorate their marriage.
For a moment, he speculates on what it would be like to be similarly adorned, to have a visible, permanent sign that he belonged to someone else. She is entirely too personable and sometimes he felt like he was in a losing battle trying to fend off male interlopers. A marriage tattoo would be a clear sign that she was taken. For a moment, he indulges in a daydream as she stretches a little, mumbling in her sleep.
He plays with a strand of her hair as reality reasserts itself. A tattoo, him? Really? There were a number of hygiene risks and a great deal of research would have to go into selecting a reputable tattoo parlor. Contagion issues aside, there was still the possibility of infection. And what if he ever needed a MRI? Depending on the type of ink used, there could be interference with the results, possibly throwing off an accurate diagnosis, leading to greater trouble in the future. No, no, it just wasn’t worth the risk.
An engagement ring would simply have to suffice. He makes a note to research the correct etiquette of proposing. He's 98.5% sure that she will answer in the affirmative when he asks her. She will benefit greatly from entering in a legal arrangement with him. There is the excellent university health care, his experience in organizing a household correctly, the superior genetic material he would contribute to future offspring...Indeed, she would be foolish to say no. Still, there's that 1.5% of him which knows he is not adept at emotional entanglements and relationships in general.
Penny was virtually an expert in this field. She had spent four years with that evolutionary throw-back Kurt. After their break-up, she had engaged in casual imbroglios, almost non-stop (the AoC drought withstanding). It continued nearly up to that moment in her apartment when she kissed him and the world as he knew it changed forever.
Her left hand is draped over his knee and he links their fingers together. Looking down at her ring finger, he wishes for a moment that he was a different man, someone more foolhardy and unaware of the mortality rate of blood pathogens. He would get a tattoo, a sunrise, he decides. It would be a visual reminder to her of all the things he cannot elucidate, all the feelings he can never properly quantify. She is the sunrise to him, bright and with the promise of new beginnings, and he thinks that if he ever loses her, his life will be shrouded by a never-ending eclipse.
It is a metaphor, of course. He is attempting to get the hang of them and obviously, he is succeeding quite well. He smiles to himself, pleased at his success, and Penny stirs. Tilting her head to look up at him, she smiles back. He removes his hand from her tattoo and strokes her cheek. He loves this. She stretches a little, nuzzling her face against his leg, and then pushes upright.
"What are you thinking about to make you smile like that? Anything interesting?"
She swings her legs around so that she straddles him, draping her arms over his shoulders. His hands rise to her waist, steadying her, automatically slipping underneath her shirt.
"Everything I think about is interesting and vitally important, but if you're seeking to ascertain my current topic of thought, I was thinking about metaphors and their correct usage. I am intensifying my study of linguistics, in order to better-"
Penny rolls her eyes and leans down to kiss him, effectively ending the line of discussion. He returns the kiss, luxuriating in the taste of her, as one palm slides again to the small of her back. This is permanence in a different form, his reaction to her, his heart beating a tattoo against his chest, his temperature rising. He will do whatever it takes to keep her in his life. Permanently.
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