Restless
So it's 3 : 00 am, can't sleep , go figure. I took 2 vicodins and seemed to have hit me quite lovely, I usually sleep amazingly after taking it, but for some reason, I can't seem to fall asleep. So I'm here sitting in my bed letting my mind wander while I listen to some NIN. Find myself in yet another depression. It really sucks because I don't want to be depressed, I mean honestly who does ? But I suffer from depression and if I tell my parents they'll most likely over react to this, so no anti-depression pills for me, or also know as 'happy pills'
So I guess the shit that continues bothering me is my whole situation with my 'school dad'. He's been kind of giving me the cold shoulder every time I go visit Wilson Prep (my high school). Guess he must be that disappointed in me about not going to college right away. Which makes me upset. Sometimes I feel like just saying 'fuck it, it's easier to walk away', but it's not... not in this case at least. He was the first person I've ever opened up to in my life, the only person I began relating to in Freshman year, we both had an amazing bond and became more of a father figure than my own dad at times. So it's so fucking hard dealing with this. I just wish he would talk to me again like we used to talk in 9th grade...Depression sucks.
[ 10th Grade 'Twin Day' ]
He surprised me by dressing the same as I do for this day, very unexpected, but made me smile and left me with a great memory...
Well I guess I should just stop my bitching and try to think of something more positive. Well it's November 7th, which means Happy Birthday JR. and Limnus' 2nd show! : )
So stoked about this. Perhaps Ner0 will be there, that'd be very amazing.
Oh I got to meet him again not too long ago, I believe it was Friday, Oct. 30, 2009, hah yeah I'm going to remember that ;D
Well he was really nice and cool and have been talking to him a few times since then, he's actually helping me out with a HT job in Berkeley.
But anyways, back to the show! If you happen to read this and you're in the Bay Area, be sure to check out this show :
In other news abrasions full length album 'Memorial' will be released this November! : )
So stoked to hear all of it, J E. has so much talent and his music is truly a piece of art work, I'm glad I've met him and was introduced to his music. Very unique and different.
Both J's have showed me how much dedication they have for music and it is truly unbelievable and amazing to see these young musicians create this new music.
I'm quite proud of them, even if I just started getting to know them, these guys are amazing people and I feel lucky to have them in my life.
So I leave you with J (abrasions) song 'Dreamer'
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