Too Good Is True, Chapter Twenty Eight: I Need A Freaking Drink
Disclaimer: I don't own any of this, I mean the author no discomfort, and guys? Please enjoy. :)
[INT. COLONEL TOBIN'S QUARTERS -- NIGHT.
Everyone sits around the table, reading the fic as Obi-Wan continues to act out the Battle of Helm's Deep with hand puppets.]
CHAPTER 28
Hot breath on my neck? Teeth? My eyes flew open and I saw . . . well, nothing . . . just darkness. More teeth.
CRITIC: You know, I think we've gotten to the point that even an Edward Cullen cameo would be better than nothing. *Sighs* We've hit rock bottom.
ATTON (sarcastic): Now we hit rock bottom?
Oh, it was Flint. I groaned and pushed him away, got up and took him out to go potty.
CHICK: Critic? You know how Alfred Hitchcock once said that fiction is life with the dull parts taken out?
CRITIC: Why yes, yes he did.
CHICK: This fic...this fic is probably the fic that gives him nightmares. And trust me, when your fic could give Alfred Hitchcock nightmares, you know it's something special. In the worst way possible.
I climbed into my bunk and . . . NOW WHAT??!?!?!
CRITIC: Whoa! No need for that, Miss Capslock Abuse!
Whatever was in my bed was warm and not wearing a shirt . . . "Joe Don?" I whispered. He grinned the darkenss. "What are you doing in my bed?"
Joe Don - "I heard you get up and take Flint out and I thought you might be cold when you came back."
I laughed. "You're bad. You know it's like 60 degrees out there. I'm going to have to punish you." I crawled in next to him and put my head in the hollow of Joe Don's neck. He put his arms around me and we fell asleep.
CANDEROUS: Can we kill them yet?
ARAWN: Maybe later, Canderous.
CANDEROUS: Dammit...
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
After we all ate a hearty breakfast of scrambled eggs and toast, Jay and Joe Don started rough-housing and shaking the bus. After about ten minutes of this, over the commotion, Gary yelled; "That's enough, children." I snickered and Gary laughed. Turning to Gary, I asked, "So where are we headed to today?"
MIRA (dully): Hell?
Gary - "Seattle."
Desiree - "Cool."
Gary - "We should be there in about," Gary looked at his watch, "Three or four hours"
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
ATTON: I used to love stars. Now they're dead to me. Cram it, Muse. Piss off, hyperspace. Screw you, Disney.
(Beat)
CRITIC: You take that back right now!
ATTON: Right. Sorry. *Sighs* The fic's really getting to me, isn't it?
ANAKIN: Fancy some caf?
ATTON: Sure.
He takes the caf machine from Anakin and sighs.
ATTON: Work your dark magic, caf.
I was curled up on the couch, reading a book and Joe Don was sitting the other end of the couch reading, or something, when something really strange happened. I was just reading my book and minding my own buisness, and I heard a little voice in my head.
her blue eyes were so clear, her curls cascading down her back. . .
my heart was pounding so hard I was sure she could hear it, then
she touched my face . . .
ANAKIN: Okay. It's official. No More For Me. *Throws away his cup of caf*
OBI-WAN (to himself): Thank the Force...
Huh? What the heck happened?!
CRITIC: Beats me. Maybe the voices in my head returned?
I looked over at Joe Don, he was lost in thought and had faraway look on his face. Wait a minute, faraway look and lost in thought, could I be reading Joe Don's mind? No, that couldn't happen . . . or could it? "Joe Don?"
Joe Don - "Hmm?"
Desiree - "What were you just thinking about?"
NASH (as Joe Don, Large Ham): Why, the latest episode of COMMUNITY, my good lady! What else?
Joe Don - "My first kiss, why?"
CRITIC (agonized): Oh God, please don't start singing...
NASH: Don't worry, I won't. Although I was going to -- least it's not Anakin singing --
ANAKIN (mock-indignant): Hey!
Desiree - "Just wondering." I should kiss her. "Go ahead." Joe Don looked puzzled.
CRITIC (muttering): Please let there be Les Yay, please let there be Les Yay --
CANDEROUS: Sorry, pal. Not by a long shot.
CRITIC: Dammit...
Joe Don - "Go ahead and what?" Uh oh.
Desiree - "Kiss me."
Joe Don - "But, how could you tell I was going to kiss you?"
Desiree - "Oh, I don't know. I could just tell." I laughed and Joe Don kissed me.
CRITIC (singing): I was far too smart/From the very start...
ATTON (singing): I am the Eggman/They are the Eggman/I am the Walrus/Coo-Coo-Cha-Choo!
MIRA: Should we tell them --
TERRI CLARK: Trust me...(overly conspiratorial whisper) It's probably better that way.
[INT. COLONEL TOBIN'S QUARTERS -- NIGHT.
Everyone sits around the table, reading the fic as Obi-Wan continues to act out the Battle of Helm's Deep with hand puppets.]
CHAPTER 28
Hot breath on my neck? Teeth? My eyes flew open and I saw . . . well, nothing . . . just darkness. More teeth.
CRITIC: You know, I think we've gotten to the point that even an Edward Cullen cameo would be better than nothing. *Sighs* We've hit rock bottom.
ATTON (sarcastic): Now we hit rock bottom?
Oh, it was Flint. I groaned and pushed him away, got up and took him out to go potty.
CHICK: Critic? You know how Alfred Hitchcock once said that fiction is life with the dull parts taken out?
CRITIC: Why yes, yes he did.
CHICK: This fic...this fic is probably the fic that gives him nightmares. And trust me, when your fic could give Alfred Hitchcock nightmares, you know it's something special. In the worst way possible.
I climbed into my bunk and . . . NOW WHAT??!?!?!
CRITIC: Whoa! No need for that, Miss Capslock Abuse!
Whatever was in my bed was warm and not wearing a shirt . . . "Joe Don?" I whispered. He grinned the darkenss. "What are you doing in my bed?"
Joe Don - "I heard you get up and take Flint out and I thought you might be cold when you came back."
I laughed. "You're bad. You know it's like 60 degrees out there. I'm going to have to punish you." I crawled in next to him and put my head in the hollow of Joe Don's neck. He put his arms around me and we fell asleep.
CANDEROUS: Can we kill them yet?
ARAWN: Maybe later, Canderous.
CANDEROUS: Dammit...
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
After we all ate a hearty breakfast of scrambled eggs and toast, Jay and Joe Don started rough-housing and shaking the bus. After about ten minutes of this, over the commotion, Gary yelled; "That's enough, children." I snickered and Gary laughed. Turning to Gary, I asked, "So where are we headed to today?"
MIRA (dully): Hell?
Gary - "Seattle."
Desiree - "Cool."
Gary - "We should be there in about," Gary looked at his watch, "Three or four hours"
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
ATTON: I used to love stars. Now they're dead to me. Cram it, Muse. Piss off, hyperspace. Screw you, Disney.
(Beat)
CRITIC: You take that back right now!
ATTON: Right. Sorry. *Sighs* The fic's really getting to me, isn't it?
ANAKIN: Fancy some caf?
ATTON: Sure.
He takes the caf machine from Anakin and sighs.
ATTON: Work your dark magic, caf.
I was curled up on the couch, reading a book and Joe Don was sitting the other end of the couch reading, or something, when something really strange happened. I was just reading my book and minding my own buisness, and I heard a little voice in my head.
her blue eyes were so clear, her curls cascading down her back. . .
my heart was pounding so hard I was sure she could hear it, then
she touched my face . . .
ANAKIN: Okay. It's official. No More For Me. *Throws away his cup of caf*
OBI-WAN (to himself): Thank the Force...
Huh? What the heck happened?!
CRITIC: Beats me. Maybe the voices in my head returned?
I looked over at Joe Don, he was lost in thought and had faraway look on his face. Wait a minute, faraway look and lost in thought, could I be reading Joe Don's mind? No, that couldn't happen . . . or could it? "Joe Don?"
Joe Don - "Hmm?"
Desiree - "What were you just thinking about?"
NASH (as Joe Don, Large Ham): Why, the latest episode of COMMUNITY, my good lady! What else?
Joe Don - "My first kiss, why?"
CRITIC (agonized): Oh God, please don't start singing...
NASH: Don't worry, I won't. Although I was going to -- least it's not Anakin singing --
ANAKIN (mock-indignant): Hey!
Desiree - "Just wondering." I should kiss her. "Go ahead." Joe Don looked puzzled.
CRITIC (muttering): Please let there be Les Yay, please let there be Les Yay --
CANDEROUS: Sorry, pal. Not by a long shot.
CRITIC: Dammit...
Joe Don - "Go ahead and what?" Uh oh.
Desiree - "Kiss me."
Joe Don - "But, how could you tell I was going to kiss you?"
Desiree - "Oh, I don't know. I could just tell." I laughed and Joe Don kissed me.
CRITIC (singing): I was far too smart/From the very start...
ATTON (singing): I am the Eggman/They are the Eggman/I am the Walrus/Coo-Coo-Cha-Choo!
MIRA: Should we tell them --
TERRI CLARK: Trust me...(overly conspiratorial whisper) It's probably better that way.