December Fireworks
Title: December Fireworks
Author: ladygray99
Fandom: Northern Exposure
Pairing/Characters: Chris/Ed/Joel
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Sometimes all it takes is a properly poetic description.
Word Count: 5,211
Spoilers: None
Notes: I would really, really, really like feedback here. I know it’s basically PWP but I tried to keep voices consistent.
Warnings: threesums, first time, double penetration.
Disclaimer: Oh so not mine.
Beta: None so please feel free to correct anything.
December Fireworks
Joel knew half the reason he wanted to specialize and get out of being a GP was so he could get out of seeing patients out of their shorts. With latex encased fingers he carefully spread Ed Chigliak’s butt cheeks.
“Um...Ed?” Joel asked carefully.
“Yes Dr. Fleischman?”
“Um...Ed...Don’t take this the wrong way but have you been engaging in anal intercourse?”
Ed looked over his shoulder. “What, Dr. Fleischman?”
“Sex, Ed. Have you been having sex? With another man?”
“Oh. Yeah.” Ed said brightly.
“Ok. Have you and your partner...”
“Chris.” Ed cut in. Joel blinked a few times trying to process the image.
“Ok. Chris. Have you and Chris been using proper lubrication?”
Ed shrugged. “Usually, but you know sometime you run out and make do...” Joel gently probed at Ed. Ed winced a little.
“Ok. First off I’m from New York so I really don’t judge but if there’s one thing I’ve heard time and time again there’s no such thing as too much lubrication.”
“I’ll keep that in mind.” Ed said with a serious nod.
“You have some minor tearing, unfortunately it’s started to become infected. I’m writing you a perscription for a topical antibiotic, an oral antibiotic and a wash I want you to use twice daily, and inform Chris your backside is off limits until I say so.”
“No problem, Dr. Fleischman.”
Joel sighed. In New York anyone as constantly perky as Ed would have been medicated by now.
“I’m going to apply some topical cream now.” Joel grabbed a tube and applied the thick white cream liberally to his fingers before diving back in as it were. “Sorry,” he said as Ed winced at the cold cream.
“It’s ok.”
Joel finished and Ed hopped up pulling up his shorts.
“So...um...can I ask? Are you and Chris a couple?”
Ed shook his head. “Oh no. He just kinda likes me so sometimes we have sex.”
“Right.”
“He likes you to, Dr. Fleischman.”
“Excuse me?”
“Yep. Sometimes when we’re together he’s thinking about you.”
Joel felt a funny pain bloom behind his left eye.
“How..? I mean does he say my name or something?”
“No, nothing like that. I can just tell sometimes.”
“I’m...I’m sorry Ed.”
“Oh it’s ok. Sometimes I’m thinking about other people too. Have a good day, Dr. Fleischman.” Ed said with a wave as he walked out the door leaving Joel in the exam room with a very odd headache.
~
Joel banged on the door of Chris’ trailer shivering a little in the September air. Chris opened the door.
“Hey Dr. F. What can I do for you?”
“Well you can start by inviting me in for one.”
Chris stepped aside. “Me trailer es su trailer.”
Joel stepped into the space that was little more than a one burner stove and couple of shelves and a bed. The bed took up half the space easily.
“So what can I do for the good doctor today?”
“You can take these and use them.” Joel shoved a 48 count box of pre lubed condoms and a large pump bottle of medical lubrication at Chris.
Chris blinked a few times. “Thanks. Can I ask why?”
“Because I had to see Ed today and I would have expected the Don Juan of the Alaskan Riviera to take better care of his partner.”
Chris shook his head slowly. “I’m not following, Joel?”
“Lubrication, Chris? I had to treat Ed for tearing and he said you don’t always use proper lubrication, and since I know you’re not exclusive I’m wondering how many more people I may have to deal with.”
Chris closed his eyes. “Oh man, I’m sorry. It’s just you know, inside kinda got used to making do, heat of the moment, didn’t really think.”
Joel suddenly had an unpleasant feeling and tried to remember just how complete a physical he’d ever given Chris.
“Just try to be more careful in the future.” Joel combed his hand through his hair a few times “Ah...look it I don’t want to potentially step on an unpleasant subject, but if you have any residual physical or physiological issues from you time inside, there are treatment options we can discuss.”
Chris gave a shake of his head. “Don’t worry about it. As the jail house philosopher I was mostly on the cool with everyone. Everything else I just sort of try to transcend, let it inform but not affect the current path.”
Joel nodded not really believing it. “Ok but next time you get a complete physical it’s going to be a complete physical.”
“Reading you loud and clear, Joel.”
“Good.” Joel nodded and made for the door then stopped. The odd little pain in his head had yet to go away. “Ed told me you think about me sometimes?” Joel blurted out quickly.
“Is that a problem?”
Joel thought about it for a moment. “No, just...I mean... last I checked I'm not exactly late night fantasy material for anyone except maybe O’Connell and that’s just ‘cause she wants to see me dead.”
“Oh I don’t know Joel, you’re kinda cute and kinda fun.”
“Fun?” Joel’s eyebrows hit his hairline. “I’m not fun, I’m a mess. I’m from New York. I’m a Jew from New York. I’m a screaming ball of paranoia, neuroses and constant cravings for a decent bagel. The only person in this town probably more nuts than I am is Adam and that’s only because I’ve been managing to hold off a complete schizophrenic break by the skin of my teeth.”
“See,” said Chris. “When you get all worked up like that. It’s kinda cute.”
“Cute?” Chris reached out and quickly ran his hand over Joel’s hair. Joel gasped his feet suddenly frozen in place.
“You are a completely unique creature in this part of the world. A man out of sync with his perceived place in the universe. You spin around this town like a Fourth of July firework set off in December that’s gotten away, all bright colors and wild ricochets.”
Joel’s jaw dropped. The funny pain in his head was still there but he realized that not a single soul had ever described him in poetic terms before, at least without the word reliable coming up. This was about as close to ‘roses are red’ as he was ever going to get.
‘Wild ricochets? Fine.’
Joel grabbed Chris by his t-shirt, yanked him down and kissed him. Chris caught up quickly and kissed back. Joel melted as Chris worked his fingers into Joel’s curls, massaging a bit and tugging a little. Joel finally pulled away catching his breath. Chris had a more than slightly smug grin.
“See, wild ricochets.”
Joel thought he might have heard a snarl from his throat. He pushed Chris down onto the bed, straddled his hips and began kissing him again. Chris’ long fingers managed to peel the heavy coat off Joel and drop it to the floor before working his hands under the work shirt.
Joel’s snarl became a whimper. He couldn’t remember the last time someone had touched him in any way more than a friendly handshake. He touched people every day but only with a protective layer of latex on his hands. He could barely remember the last time he’d felt skin. He worked his own hands under Chris’ shirt and began licking his neck. A part of Joel remembered that Chris bathed in the lake and was quickly cataloging the number of protozoa he could be picking up at the moment, but seeing as how most of the blood for his brain had migrated south he wasn’t that worried.
Joel felt Chris’s fingers pinch gently at his nipples. Joel ground his hips into Chris, a sadly desperate groan escaping his lips. “And vocal to.” Chris mumbled against Joel’s neck.
The door to the trailer suddenly came open. Joel panicked and fell from Chris’s lap onto the floor.
“Hey, Ed.” Chris said with a friendly wave.
“Hey, Chris, hey Dr. Fleischman.” Ed said brightly.
“This isn’t what it looks likes.” Joel said quickly trying to tuck his shirt back in.
Ed’s face fell. “Oh. You weren’t about to have sex with Chris?”
Joel froze. “Ah...we hadn’t discussed that far.”
“What can I do for you, Ed?” Chris asked.
“Oh? Ruth-Anne just asked me to drop these off for you on my way home.” Ed held up a couple of tubes of paint.
“Great. Just stick them on the counter.”
“Well, I’ll let you two get back to it.” Ed said, heading to the door.
“Aw Ed, you don’t have to go.” said Chris.
“What?!” snapped Joel, still on the floor wallowing in embarrassment.
“Ok.” replied Ed a bright smile splitting his face.
Joel looked at Ed. Ed suddenly looked predatory. It was very, very wrong. Under no circumstances under heaven or earth should Ed Chigliak be capable of looking predatory. Especially directed at him.
“Hold on! Time out!” Joel jumped up. “Ok I’m all for ricochets and experimenting and losing and or expanding my mind in this frozen hell hole but...”
“But what, Joel?” Joel looked at Chris leaning back on his bed, his erection evident even through the jeans. He looked at Ed who had lust in those usually innocent eyes.
Joel let out a sigh. “Fuck it. Why not?” He began undo his tie and pull his shirt back out of his pants. “I mean I’ve completely lost my mind anyways. So why not?”
“Well all right.” said Ed so perky it made Joel roll his eyes before grabbing Ed and kissing him deeply.
“And you better be thinking about me.” Joel growled after breaking off the kiss. Chris chuckled from the bed. “You too.”
“Just for you Joel, I think I can manage that.” Joel let himself be dragged back onto the bed dragging Ed with him. Chris attacked his lips while Ed worked the back of his neck. Joel felt his brain begin to melt.
“No,” he breathed suddenly pulling away. “Skin.” He yanked off his shirt then grabbed the bottom of Chris’ with suddenly clumsy fingers. “If I’m going to give myself a whole new mess of neuroses I want to feel skin.” Chris and Ed both chuckled and helped Joel undress himself and each other.
Joel marveled at the way their skin tones stood out against each other when Chris and Ed touched. Looking at the two he couldn’t decide which one he wanted to kiss more. Chris made the decision for him. “Ed likes having his nipples licked.” Chris whispered in his ear. Joel dove in running his tongue along the small hard nipples. Ed groaned and grasped at Joel’s hair, Ed’s not insubstantial erection rubbing against Joel’s chest. As Joel ran his hands along Ed’s body, taking bits of whispered advice from Chris he was amazed at the heat Ed put out. It was like having sex with a furnace.
When Ed’s thrusts became a little more urgent he pulled back, catching his breath and leaning against Chris’ cooler frame. He closed his eyes as Chris’ hands played across his body, caressing and scratching gently. He couldn’t help the groan that came out when a fiery hot mouth wrapped around his erection and began to suck. He tried to hold his hips steady but that became impossible when he felt a throat constrict around the head of his cock. He thrust his hips up and managed to pry open one lust heavy eye to see what was going on. Joel decided that Ed Chigliak should not, in a rational universe, know how to deep throat. Then again there’s just not a lot to do in winter sometimes other than work on a new skill.
“He’s good at that, isn’t he?” Chris whispered in his ear.
Joel only groaned unable to find words.
Ed stopped sucking and leaned back looking inordinately please with himself for having rendered Dr. Fleischman speechless.
Joel closed his eyes again wiggling so he was spooned into Chris’ lap, Chris’ erection sandwiched between his stomach and Joel’s lower back. Joel sighed, reveling in the attention his body was receiving. Chris’ cool long hands playing across his torso, Ed’s fiery hot hands playing with his cock and balls. Joel felt like he should be reciprocating more but the connection between brain and body had melted at some point and he just couldn’t move. That was until he felt Ed’s finger ghost across his anus. Joel jumped as conflicting signals of pleasure and panic suddenly raced across his body. It was only Chris’ long arms wrapped around him that kept him from coming right off the bed.
“Um...Chris?” Ed said. “I don’t think Dr. Fleischman’s done this before.”
“Considering we’re naked in bed do you think you could call me Joel?”
“Is Ed right, Joel?” Chris asked.
Joel shook his head. “Doesn’t matter,” he said panting hard with lust and panic.
Chris leaned around and kissed him deeply. “Yes it does.” Chris said when he finally broke off the kiss. “Matters a lot.” Ed crawled up his body and kissed him next. Just as deep but somehow more tenderly. Joel squeezed his eyes shut as a whimper escaped his throat.
“Ed, why don’t you grab some of the presents the good doctor brought.”
Ed hopped off the bed and retrieved the large pump bottle of lube and a string of condoms. Joel was panicking. He knew he should just say no, say stop, run screaming into the early autumn night.
Chris began massaging his chest and playing gently with his nipples. Joel felt himself melt again and rested his head beneath Chris’ chin. Ed’s warm hands returned to his balls and slowly worked their way lower until a finger slicked with lube was running light circles around the tight ring of muscle it found. Chris nibbled the top of Joel’s ear and he barely noticed when one of Ed’s fingers quickly slipped in. He did notice when it twisted around and brushed his prostate.
Joel jumped but Ed’s finger followed. “Holy, crap!” Ed and Chris both chuckled as Joel panted for breath. “Holy…” he breathed out softly.
Ed’s finger began to move gently in and out occasionally ghosting against Joel’s prostate causing electric jolts to dance through his body. If Joel thought his brain had melted before he wasn’t even close. Joel pried his eyes open to look at Ed. Ed looked perfectly content, a simple, patient look on his face, like he could happily do what he was doing all night.
Ed looked past Joel and he and Chris had some sort of silent conversation.
Chris gave Joel’s nipples a twist and Ed slipped a second finger in. Joel winced a little and Ed held his fingers steady.
Chris ran his fingers through Joel’s hair like his was calming a skittish animal. “Just relax Joel. Let Ed take care of you.”
‘Relax!?’ Joel thought not managing to get his lips working. Chris began playing his fingers down Joel’s body again and despite everything Joel did find himself begin to relax. Ed’s fingers began to move again. Slowly, but twisting and stretching. Joel would have blushed at the shameful noises coming from his lips if he had any blood left to blush with. The gasps and moans were blatantly pornographic but try as he might he couldn’t seem to control them.
By the time Ed slipped in a third finger and his pinkie for good measure Joel couldn’t even open his eyes anymore. He felt drunk, drugged. A small part of his rational brain had detached and was analytically cataloging every noise, sensation, and feeling for future over-analysis and possibly a very dirty letter to his ex fiancé.
Joel reached for his cock, his hips bucking shamefully on Ed’s well lubed fingers. Before he could do more than squeeze Chris took his arms and pinned them gently to the bed on either side of them. Joel didn’t fight, didn’t want to fight, just wanted whatever was going to happen, to happen.
“How’s he doing, Ed?” Chris asked in a husky whisper.
“Really good,” Ed replied lust doing strange things to the usually sunny voice.
“How are you holding up, Joel?” Chris asked in his ear. Joel made a whimpering noise. “I need a real word.”
“Need…” Joel managed to gasp out.
“Need what?” Joel shook his head. He didn’t know what he needed, couldn’t think of the words.
Ed drew his fingers all the way out. Joel whimpered again at the suddenly empty ache.
Joel managed to barely pry an eye open at the sound of a condom wrapper opening. Lust was clouding his vision, his eyes wouldn’t focus. Through the blurs he made out Ed rolling a condom onto himself. It looked tight. Detached, analytical Joel made a note that Ed should probably be using the next size up from generic.
Joel closed his eyes again and spread his legs knowing he was to far gone to say no now.
“Just take a deep breath, Joel.” Chris advised wrapping his arms around Joel’s chest.
Joel took a deep breath and Ed filled him. There wasn’t much pain but the shock of raw pleasure pulled a cry from his throat. Ed didn’t move. Instead he leaned forward to lay across Joel’s chest and kiss him. Joel kissed back franticly working his fingers into Ed’s long hair. Ed moved the slightest bit and Joel’s whole body jumped again. He gasped drawing air from Ed’s deep kiss.
“How’s he feel, Ed?” Chris asked.
“So good.” Ed breathed into Joel’s mouth.
Joel could feel Chris’ cock twitch against his back.
Ed began to slowly slide out at a pace that put one in mind of glaciers. Joel’s body was out of his control, limbs heavy, occasionally twitching at small shocks of pleasure. Chris placed his hands on Joel’s hips keeping them steady. When Ed had just the head of his cock left in he shifted and headed back in at an equally show pace. Joel tried to clamp down or push back suddenly wanting more, wanting harder and deeper, wanting pain, the chronically guilt wracked little boy in his head telling him this shouldn’t feel so good, it should hurt more. But Ed kept up his Zen like snail pace of slow penetration and slow withdraw, never stopping between the two, always keeping movement going.
Joel finally got his brain and lips in sync enough to form a word. “More…”
His detached brain was pretty sure that the word they had been going for was ‘stop’ or at least ‘wait’. Joel felt a rumble through his body as Chris and Ed both chuckled.
“Tell me how good he feels, Ed.” Chris asked in a husky whisper.
“Perfect,” said Ed. “So tight, hot.”
Joel felt Chris move his hands and there was the sound of lube bottle being pumped. Ed was almost out again. Chris snaked a well lubed hand under one of Joel’s thighs and Ed slipped back in a little smoother. Then something else slipped in as well. Joel cried out at the combined pain, pleasure of Chris sliding two long fingers in with Ed’s cock.
“Is this what you meant by more?” Chris whispered in his ear.
Joel was fairly sure it wasn’t. He tried to shake his head but was afraid it got lost in the twitching and arching of his body.
Chris started working his fingers quickly in and out, twisting and stretching in rapid counter point to Ed’s continued slow, lazy pace. Detached Joel had a sinking feeling about what he was being worked up to but resigned himself to the fact that it was going to happen anyhow because the rest of Joel just didn’t care and wasn’t listening. Detached Joel went back to cataloging pornographic noises, calculating just how much damage was being done to his body and psyche, and drafting a very, very dirty letter to Elaine.
Ed pulled almost out. Chris worked in four long fingers. Joel wasn’t sure what was happening anymore. Every touch felt painfully good, his breath coming in short hard gasps, he felt dizzy and disconnected and at the same time felt more aware of his own body than ever before.
He pulled open his eyes one more time and looked into Ed’s. The blue was darker than he’d ever seen them, almost obliterated by wide black pupils. Ed for the first time thrust in quick and hard and Joel squeezed his eyes shut again.
Joel was suddenly pushed forward. A part of his brain reconnected just long enough to keep his balance as he was pressed chest to chest with Ed, Ed rocking slowly inside him. Joel wrapped his arms around Ed for support. Ed kissed him.
There was the sound of a condom wrapper opening and lube being procured. Joel gritted his teeth. He knew he just had to say no, say stop, he knew Chris would stop. Like a magic trick Chris made his fingers vanish and then magically replaced them in one quick thrust with his cock, long and thin like the rest of him. Joel cried and bit down on Ed’s shoulder, tears suddenly squeezing out of eyes determined to remain shut. Chris and Ed both let out long groans. Joel sucked in deep lungs of air trying to will his body to adjust, to relax. Ed worked one hand into his hair and gently rubbed while whispering softly words Joel didn’t understand. Joel found he did begin to relax.
Ed moved first, sliding out as much as he could, Chris following a moment later. Ed set the pace, slow and easy but faster than before, Chris mirroring each move just a second behind, like a physical echo. It didn’t take long however for it to become too much, even for Ed. The thrusts fell out of sync becoming hard and shallow pounding away.
Joel had been at the breaking point for too long and let out a sob of frustration desperate to cum. Chris’s long fingers wrapped around his cock and that’s all that was needed. Joel came, a scream ripped from his lungs, every muscle contracting starved for blood and oxygen, and each wave of pleasure and pain seemed to last forever.
Joel didn’t quite black out but came close. His head spun and he collapsed against Ed even as Chris and Ed cried out through their own orgasms.
‘Breathe.’ Joel ordered his body.
Chris recovered first and pulled out hopping off the bed. Joel fell backwards pulling himself off Ed in the process. The air was suddenly shockingly cold. Joel curled into a ball his whole body shaking. Ed stripped off his own condom and lay down next to Joel stroking his head.
“How ya doing, Joel?” Chris asked. Joel made a small noise. “Here, let’s clean you up.” Joel hissed and shivered harder as a cold damp cloth wiped the cum from his stomach and the lube from ass.
“Are you ok, Dr. Fleischman?” Ed asked softly. Joel opened his eyes and looked into Ed’s, that strange dark blue peering almost shyly out from under a mess of black hair.
‘Am I ok?’
Detached Joel finally spoke up.
“I am in a mild case of clinical shock, could someone please elevate my feet and keep me warm so I don’t die, thank you.”
Chris shoved a spare pillow under Joel’s feet and the furnace that was Ed snuggled in close and put a gentle kiss on Joel’s forehead.
“Well at least you haven’t run screaming into the night.” Chris said.
“Stevens, I have just lost a form of virginity in a manner befitting a porn star.” Joel mumbled out through thick lips. “I am not moving a muscle for at least half an hour.”
“Wouldn’t have pegged you for a cuddler, Joel.”
“Shut up and get back into bed and keep me warm so I don’t die.”
“As the doctor orders.” Chris crawled into bed and pulled a blanket over the three of them.
Joel dozed off hoping that he’d wake up again.
~
Joel cracked one eye open then another. The trailer was void of electric light but a full moon and the first flickering green aurora borealis of the season provided enough light to see by.
Joel did a personal once over. ‘Breathing steady. Pulse consistent. Body... Oh God.’
Sandwiched between Ed and Chris, both breathing softly, Joel was warm. The front of his body, pressed chest to chest with Ed was verging on hot but everything else... Joel hurt. His whole body ached like a repeat of the one bar fight he’d ever been in, right after med school. With one noticeable difference. Joel tried to clench his ass and instantly regretted it. The ache that shot through was impressive but at the same time Joel had a feeling it could be worse. Nothing felt torn but he’d have to take a look and that would be unpleasant.
Joel closed his eyes half tempted to try to go back to sleep but he felt a slight shift in Ed’s breathing. Joel opened his eyes again and found himself looking directly into Ed’s which looked black in the moon light. Ed lifted one hand and gently touched his fingers to Joel’s lips. Joel felt a sound leap from his throat. It was something between a gasp and a sob. The panic that should have probably kicked in earlier finally caught up.
Joel crawled over Chris, kicking him solidly in the ribs in the process, pulled on his pants, slipped his feet in his boots and pulled his jacket around himself without bothering to put on his shirt first. Joel gathered up his shirt, socks, tie and underwear and took the half step to the door. He cast a quick look back to the bed. Ed had scooted over so he was spooned along Chris and draped half over him. Both men were watching Joel intently but said nothing. They looked like they should be posing for some painting. ‘Angels of Temptation in Moonlight’. Joel opened the door and escaped into the night.
~
The clock in his cabin told him it wasn’t even ten yet. It was only the dark of the early Alaskan night that made if feel like it should be three or four in the morning. The first thing Joel was aware of when he got into his cabin was his stomach reminding him that he’d put off dinner for physical exertion. Joel found half an uneaten sandwich in the fridge and shoved it in his mouth before heading to his tiny bathroom. Joel stripped down for a second time that night, but this time looked at himself.
“Well...Fuck.”
Joel had to admit that he looked well and truly fucked. His hair was everywhere, his lips were swollen, there were finger bruises coming up on his hips and arms, some residual cum stuck to his stomach, and at some point apparently he had cried.
Joel found a hand mirror, abandoned by a previous renter, and contorted himself into a fairly uncomfortable position. What he saw disturbed him. He’d been called a tight ass most of his adult life and then some. He gently prodded and found his finger slipped easily in with hardly a shred of resistance. He poked around to see if he could feel any tearing. Joel had to admit Ed’s lengthy prep seemed to have saved him that particular problem then Joel brushed his own prostate. He jumped and dropped the mirror, chiding himself for being a superstitious idiot when he was glad it didn’t break. He also chided himself for the stir of arousal.
Joel hopped in the shower and scrubbed himself like he was prepping to do surgery naked.
‘You’re acting like you didn’t start it, Joel.’ A small voice in his head that sounded suspiciously like Elaine stated. ‘You kissed Chris and it was good. You kissed Ed and it was even better. You took them both and you never said stop and you enjoyed it. You have never cum that hard in your life and you know it.’
“Shut up.” Joel growled to himself out loud.
When the hot water ran out Joel fell into bed, face down, legs spread. The little voice in his head told him he should get used to that position. He told the little voice to shut up again and fell into a hard sleep.
~
Joel knew one of the things he didn’t like about Cicely was the complete lack of privacy. He knew in his heart that Ed had told no one and Chris had told no one. It wasn’t even hinted at or insinuated but a chickadee not yet bedded down for hibernation peeked through the dirty window of Chris’ trailer and saw something that blew its little birdie mind. It flew off and told a raven, that told a bear, that told Marilyn when she took out the trash in the morning and Marilyn didn’t tell a soul, she just thought about it while walking down the street and now the whole damn town knew. Joel was sure that’s the way it went.
He walked into his office. Marilyn smirked at him and blushed a little then went back to her knitting.
“What?” Joel asked in annoyance knowing exactly what.
“Nothing.” Marilyn replied in that slow controlled way of speaking she had.
“Have we got anyone this morning?”
“Not yet.”
“Ok. Well. I’ll be in my office.”
Joel wandered into his office and looked at the hard, wood chair behind his desk. The drive into town had been bad enough. Joel flipped on the radio. Chris was going through a bit of a classic folk rock phase and Bob Dylan was playing.
“Fleischman!” Joel spun around at Maurice’s bellow as he stormed into the office. “Fleischman.” He barked again.
“Good morning Maurice. What can I do for you?”
“Fleischman, I have heard a very disturbing rumor this morning.”
“Really?”
“I have heard that you have become… a raging homosexual.”
Joel perched on his desk, schooling his features against the discomfort, and crossed his legs in a manner he hoped would come across as a little coy.
“And if I said yes would you let me out of my contract?”
“Hell no!” Maurice bellowed again.
“Then I really don’t see how it matters any which way.”
Maurice turned a few interesting shades of red and shook his finger at Joel. “I’m keeping an eye on you Fleischman.”
Joel smiled. “Well enjoy the view, Maurice.” Maurice shook his finger again and stormed out.
The song finished on the radio. “And this next one goes out to our own Dr. F from the great S and G. A little something to remind you of the Big A.” Guitar cords faded up. “Tom get your plain right on time...”
Joel began to laugh. He felt the laugh well up in him and spill out across the room as Paul Simon sung about being the only living boy in New York and insisted he had nothing to do but smile. Joel laughed until he cried and then he laughed again, feeling that for some strange reason he too had nothing to do but smile.
Author: ladygray99
Fandom: Northern Exposure
Pairing/Characters: Chris/Ed/Joel
Rating: NC-17
Summary: Sometimes all it takes is a properly poetic description.
Word Count: 5,211
Spoilers: None
Notes: I would really, really, really like feedback here. I know it’s basically PWP but I tried to keep voices consistent.
Warnings: threesums, first time, double penetration.
Disclaimer: Oh so not mine.
Beta: None so please feel free to correct anything.
December Fireworks
Joel knew half the reason he wanted to specialize and get out of being a GP was so he could get out of seeing patients out of their shorts. With latex encased fingers he carefully spread Ed Chigliak’s butt cheeks.
“Um...Ed?” Joel asked carefully.
“Yes Dr. Fleischman?”
“Um...Ed...Don’t take this the wrong way but have you been engaging in anal intercourse?”
Ed looked over his shoulder. “What, Dr. Fleischman?”
“Sex, Ed. Have you been having sex? With another man?”
“Oh. Yeah.” Ed said brightly.
“Ok. Have you and your partner...”
“Chris.” Ed cut in. Joel blinked a few times trying to process the image.
“Ok. Chris. Have you and Chris been using proper lubrication?”
Ed shrugged. “Usually, but you know sometime you run out and make do...” Joel gently probed at Ed. Ed winced a little.
“Ok. First off I’m from New York so I really don’t judge but if there’s one thing I’ve heard time and time again there’s no such thing as too much lubrication.”
“I’ll keep that in mind.” Ed said with a serious nod.
“You have some minor tearing, unfortunately it’s started to become infected. I’m writing you a perscription for a topical antibiotic, an oral antibiotic and a wash I want you to use twice daily, and inform Chris your backside is off limits until I say so.”
“No problem, Dr. Fleischman.”
Joel sighed. In New York anyone as constantly perky as Ed would have been medicated by now.
“I’m going to apply some topical cream now.” Joel grabbed a tube and applied the thick white cream liberally to his fingers before diving back in as it were. “Sorry,” he said as Ed winced at the cold cream.
“It’s ok.”
Joel finished and Ed hopped up pulling up his shorts.
“So...um...can I ask? Are you and Chris a couple?”
Ed shook his head. “Oh no. He just kinda likes me so sometimes we have sex.”
“Right.”
“He likes you to, Dr. Fleischman.”
“Excuse me?”
“Yep. Sometimes when we’re together he’s thinking about you.”
Joel felt a funny pain bloom behind his left eye.
“How..? I mean does he say my name or something?”
“No, nothing like that. I can just tell sometimes.”
“I’m...I’m sorry Ed.”
“Oh it’s ok. Sometimes I’m thinking about other people too. Have a good day, Dr. Fleischman.” Ed said with a wave as he walked out the door leaving Joel in the exam room with a very odd headache.
~
Joel banged on the door of Chris’ trailer shivering a little in the September air. Chris opened the door.
“Hey Dr. F. What can I do for you?”
“Well you can start by inviting me in for one.”
Chris stepped aside. “Me trailer es su trailer.”
Joel stepped into the space that was little more than a one burner stove and couple of shelves and a bed. The bed took up half the space easily.
“So what can I do for the good doctor today?”
“You can take these and use them.” Joel shoved a 48 count box of pre lubed condoms and a large pump bottle of medical lubrication at Chris.
Chris blinked a few times. “Thanks. Can I ask why?”
“Because I had to see Ed today and I would have expected the Don Juan of the Alaskan Riviera to take better care of his partner.”
Chris shook his head slowly. “I’m not following, Joel?”
“Lubrication, Chris? I had to treat Ed for tearing and he said you don’t always use proper lubrication, and since I know you’re not exclusive I’m wondering how many more people I may have to deal with.”
Chris closed his eyes. “Oh man, I’m sorry. It’s just you know, inside kinda got used to making do, heat of the moment, didn’t really think.”
Joel suddenly had an unpleasant feeling and tried to remember just how complete a physical he’d ever given Chris.
“Just try to be more careful in the future.” Joel combed his hand through his hair a few times “Ah...look it I don’t want to potentially step on an unpleasant subject, but if you have any residual physical or physiological issues from you time inside, there are treatment options we can discuss.”
Chris gave a shake of his head. “Don’t worry about it. As the jail house philosopher I was mostly on the cool with everyone. Everything else I just sort of try to transcend, let it inform but not affect the current path.”
Joel nodded not really believing it. “Ok but next time you get a complete physical it’s going to be a complete physical.”
“Reading you loud and clear, Joel.”
“Good.” Joel nodded and made for the door then stopped. The odd little pain in his head had yet to go away. “Ed told me you think about me sometimes?” Joel blurted out quickly.
“Is that a problem?”
Joel thought about it for a moment. “No, just...I mean... last I checked I'm not exactly late night fantasy material for anyone except maybe O’Connell and that’s just ‘cause she wants to see me dead.”
“Oh I don’t know Joel, you’re kinda cute and kinda fun.”
“Fun?” Joel’s eyebrows hit his hairline. “I’m not fun, I’m a mess. I’m from New York. I’m a Jew from New York. I’m a screaming ball of paranoia, neuroses and constant cravings for a decent bagel. The only person in this town probably more nuts than I am is Adam and that’s only because I’ve been managing to hold off a complete schizophrenic break by the skin of my teeth.”
“See,” said Chris. “When you get all worked up like that. It’s kinda cute.”
“Cute?” Chris reached out and quickly ran his hand over Joel’s hair. Joel gasped his feet suddenly frozen in place.
“You are a completely unique creature in this part of the world. A man out of sync with his perceived place in the universe. You spin around this town like a Fourth of July firework set off in December that’s gotten away, all bright colors and wild ricochets.”
Joel’s jaw dropped. The funny pain in his head was still there but he realized that not a single soul had ever described him in poetic terms before, at least without the word reliable coming up. This was about as close to ‘roses are red’ as he was ever going to get.
‘Wild ricochets? Fine.’
Joel grabbed Chris by his t-shirt, yanked him down and kissed him. Chris caught up quickly and kissed back. Joel melted as Chris worked his fingers into Joel’s curls, massaging a bit and tugging a little. Joel finally pulled away catching his breath. Chris had a more than slightly smug grin.
“See, wild ricochets.”
Joel thought he might have heard a snarl from his throat. He pushed Chris down onto the bed, straddled his hips and began kissing him again. Chris’ long fingers managed to peel the heavy coat off Joel and drop it to the floor before working his hands under the work shirt.
Joel’s snarl became a whimper. He couldn’t remember the last time someone had touched him in any way more than a friendly handshake. He touched people every day but only with a protective layer of latex on his hands. He could barely remember the last time he’d felt skin. He worked his own hands under Chris’ shirt and began licking his neck. A part of Joel remembered that Chris bathed in the lake and was quickly cataloging the number of protozoa he could be picking up at the moment, but seeing as how most of the blood for his brain had migrated south he wasn’t that worried.
Joel felt Chris’s fingers pinch gently at his nipples. Joel ground his hips into Chris, a sadly desperate groan escaping his lips. “And vocal to.” Chris mumbled against Joel’s neck.
The door to the trailer suddenly came open. Joel panicked and fell from Chris’s lap onto the floor.
“Hey, Ed.” Chris said with a friendly wave.
“Hey, Chris, hey Dr. Fleischman.” Ed said brightly.
“This isn’t what it looks likes.” Joel said quickly trying to tuck his shirt back in.
Ed’s face fell. “Oh. You weren’t about to have sex with Chris?”
Joel froze. “Ah...we hadn’t discussed that far.”
“What can I do for you, Ed?” Chris asked.
“Oh? Ruth-Anne just asked me to drop these off for you on my way home.” Ed held up a couple of tubes of paint.
“Great. Just stick them on the counter.”
“Well, I’ll let you two get back to it.” Ed said, heading to the door.
“Aw Ed, you don’t have to go.” said Chris.
“What?!” snapped Joel, still on the floor wallowing in embarrassment.
“Ok.” replied Ed a bright smile splitting his face.
Joel looked at Ed. Ed suddenly looked predatory. It was very, very wrong. Under no circumstances under heaven or earth should Ed Chigliak be capable of looking predatory. Especially directed at him.
“Hold on! Time out!” Joel jumped up. “Ok I’m all for ricochets and experimenting and losing and or expanding my mind in this frozen hell hole but...”
“But what, Joel?” Joel looked at Chris leaning back on his bed, his erection evident even through the jeans. He looked at Ed who had lust in those usually innocent eyes.
Joel let out a sigh. “Fuck it. Why not?” He began undo his tie and pull his shirt back out of his pants. “I mean I’ve completely lost my mind anyways. So why not?”
“Well all right.” said Ed so perky it made Joel roll his eyes before grabbing Ed and kissing him deeply.
“And you better be thinking about me.” Joel growled after breaking off the kiss. Chris chuckled from the bed. “You too.”
“Just for you Joel, I think I can manage that.” Joel let himself be dragged back onto the bed dragging Ed with him. Chris attacked his lips while Ed worked the back of his neck. Joel felt his brain begin to melt.
“No,” he breathed suddenly pulling away. “Skin.” He yanked off his shirt then grabbed the bottom of Chris’ with suddenly clumsy fingers. “If I’m going to give myself a whole new mess of neuroses I want to feel skin.” Chris and Ed both chuckled and helped Joel undress himself and each other.
Joel marveled at the way their skin tones stood out against each other when Chris and Ed touched. Looking at the two he couldn’t decide which one he wanted to kiss more. Chris made the decision for him. “Ed likes having his nipples licked.” Chris whispered in his ear. Joel dove in running his tongue along the small hard nipples. Ed groaned and grasped at Joel’s hair, Ed’s not insubstantial erection rubbing against Joel’s chest. As Joel ran his hands along Ed’s body, taking bits of whispered advice from Chris he was amazed at the heat Ed put out. It was like having sex with a furnace.
When Ed’s thrusts became a little more urgent he pulled back, catching his breath and leaning against Chris’ cooler frame. He closed his eyes as Chris’ hands played across his body, caressing and scratching gently. He couldn’t help the groan that came out when a fiery hot mouth wrapped around his erection and began to suck. He tried to hold his hips steady but that became impossible when he felt a throat constrict around the head of his cock. He thrust his hips up and managed to pry open one lust heavy eye to see what was going on. Joel decided that Ed Chigliak should not, in a rational universe, know how to deep throat. Then again there’s just not a lot to do in winter sometimes other than work on a new skill.
“He’s good at that, isn’t he?” Chris whispered in his ear.
Joel only groaned unable to find words.
Ed stopped sucking and leaned back looking inordinately please with himself for having rendered Dr. Fleischman speechless.
Joel closed his eyes again wiggling so he was spooned into Chris’ lap, Chris’ erection sandwiched between his stomach and Joel’s lower back. Joel sighed, reveling in the attention his body was receiving. Chris’ cool long hands playing across his torso, Ed’s fiery hot hands playing with his cock and balls. Joel felt like he should be reciprocating more but the connection between brain and body had melted at some point and he just couldn’t move. That was until he felt Ed’s finger ghost across his anus. Joel jumped as conflicting signals of pleasure and panic suddenly raced across his body. It was only Chris’ long arms wrapped around him that kept him from coming right off the bed.
“Um...Chris?” Ed said. “I don’t think Dr. Fleischman’s done this before.”
“Considering we’re naked in bed do you think you could call me Joel?”
“Is Ed right, Joel?” Chris asked.
Joel shook his head. “Doesn’t matter,” he said panting hard with lust and panic.
Chris leaned around and kissed him deeply. “Yes it does.” Chris said when he finally broke off the kiss. “Matters a lot.” Ed crawled up his body and kissed him next. Just as deep but somehow more tenderly. Joel squeezed his eyes shut as a whimper escaped his throat.
“Ed, why don’t you grab some of the presents the good doctor brought.”
Ed hopped off the bed and retrieved the large pump bottle of lube and a string of condoms. Joel was panicking. He knew he should just say no, say stop, run screaming into the early autumn night.
Chris began massaging his chest and playing gently with his nipples. Joel felt himself melt again and rested his head beneath Chris’ chin. Ed’s warm hands returned to his balls and slowly worked their way lower until a finger slicked with lube was running light circles around the tight ring of muscle it found. Chris nibbled the top of Joel’s ear and he barely noticed when one of Ed’s fingers quickly slipped in. He did notice when it twisted around and brushed his prostate.
Joel jumped but Ed’s finger followed. “Holy, crap!” Ed and Chris both chuckled as Joel panted for breath. “Holy…” he breathed out softly.
Ed’s finger began to move gently in and out occasionally ghosting against Joel’s prostate causing electric jolts to dance through his body. If Joel thought his brain had melted before he wasn’t even close. Joel pried his eyes open to look at Ed. Ed looked perfectly content, a simple, patient look on his face, like he could happily do what he was doing all night.
Ed looked past Joel and he and Chris had some sort of silent conversation.
Chris gave Joel’s nipples a twist and Ed slipped a second finger in. Joel winced a little and Ed held his fingers steady.
Chris ran his fingers through Joel’s hair like his was calming a skittish animal. “Just relax Joel. Let Ed take care of you.”
‘Relax!?’ Joel thought not managing to get his lips working. Chris began playing his fingers down Joel’s body again and despite everything Joel did find himself begin to relax. Ed’s fingers began to move again. Slowly, but twisting and stretching. Joel would have blushed at the shameful noises coming from his lips if he had any blood left to blush with. The gasps and moans were blatantly pornographic but try as he might he couldn’t seem to control them.
By the time Ed slipped in a third finger and his pinkie for good measure Joel couldn’t even open his eyes anymore. He felt drunk, drugged. A small part of his rational brain had detached and was analytically cataloging every noise, sensation, and feeling for future over-analysis and possibly a very dirty letter to his ex fiancé.
Joel reached for his cock, his hips bucking shamefully on Ed’s well lubed fingers. Before he could do more than squeeze Chris took his arms and pinned them gently to the bed on either side of them. Joel didn’t fight, didn’t want to fight, just wanted whatever was going to happen, to happen.
“How’s he doing, Ed?” Chris asked in a husky whisper.
“Really good,” Ed replied lust doing strange things to the usually sunny voice.
“How are you holding up, Joel?” Chris asked in his ear. Joel made a whimpering noise. “I need a real word.”
“Need…” Joel managed to gasp out.
“Need what?” Joel shook his head. He didn’t know what he needed, couldn’t think of the words.
Ed drew his fingers all the way out. Joel whimpered again at the suddenly empty ache.
Joel managed to barely pry an eye open at the sound of a condom wrapper opening. Lust was clouding his vision, his eyes wouldn’t focus. Through the blurs he made out Ed rolling a condom onto himself. It looked tight. Detached, analytical Joel made a note that Ed should probably be using the next size up from generic.
Joel closed his eyes again and spread his legs knowing he was to far gone to say no now.
“Just take a deep breath, Joel.” Chris advised wrapping his arms around Joel’s chest.
Joel took a deep breath and Ed filled him. There wasn’t much pain but the shock of raw pleasure pulled a cry from his throat. Ed didn’t move. Instead he leaned forward to lay across Joel’s chest and kiss him. Joel kissed back franticly working his fingers into Ed’s long hair. Ed moved the slightest bit and Joel’s whole body jumped again. He gasped drawing air from Ed’s deep kiss.
“How’s he feel, Ed?” Chris asked.
“So good.” Ed breathed into Joel’s mouth.
Joel could feel Chris’ cock twitch against his back.
Ed began to slowly slide out at a pace that put one in mind of glaciers. Joel’s body was out of his control, limbs heavy, occasionally twitching at small shocks of pleasure. Chris placed his hands on Joel’s hips keeping them steady. When Ed had just the head of his cock left in he shifted and headed back in at an equally show pace. Joel tried to clamp down or push back suddenly wanting more, wanting harder and deeper, wanting pain, the chronically guilt wracked little boy in his head telling him this shouldn’t feel so good, it should hurt more. But Ed kept up his Zen like snail pace of slow penetration and slow withdraw, never stopping between the two, always keeping movement going.
Joel finally got his brain and lips in sync enough to form a word. “More…”
His detached brain was pretty sure that the word they had been going for was ‘stop’ or at least ‘wait’. Joel felt a rumble through his body as Chris and Ed both chuckled.
“Tell me how good he feels, Ed.” Chris asked in a husky whisper.
“Perfect,” said Ed. “So tight, hot.”
Joel felt Chris move his hands and there was the sound of lube bottle being pumped. Ed was almost out again. Chris snaked a well lubed hand under one of Joel’s thighs and Ed slipped back in a little smoother. Then something else slipped in as well. Joel cried out at the combined pain, pleasure of Chris sliding two long fingers in with Ed’s cock.
“Is this what you meant by more?” Chris whispered in his ear.
Joel was fairly sure it wasn’t. He tried to shake his head but was afraid it got lost in the twitching and arching of his body.
Chris started working his fingers quickly in and out, twisting and stretching in rapid counter point to Ed’s continued slow, lazy pace. Detached Joel had a sinking feeling about what he was being worked up to but resigned himself to the fact that it was going to happen anyhow because the rest of Joel just didn’t care and wasn’t listening. Detached Joel went back to cataloging pornographic noises, calculating just how much damage was being done to his body and psyche, and drafting a very, very dirty letter to Elaine.
Ed pulled almost out. Chris worked in four long fingers. Joel wasn’t sure what was happening anymore. Every touch felt painfully good, his breath coming in short hard gasps, he felt dizzy and disconnected and at the same time felt more aware of his own body than ever before.
He pulled open his eyes one more time and looked into Ed’s. The blue was darker than he’d ever seen them, almost obliterated by wide black pupils. Ed for the first time thrust in quick and hard and Joel squeezed his eyes shut again.
Joel was suddenly pushed forward. A part of his brain reconnected just long enough to keep his balance as he was pressed chest to chest with Ed, Ed rocking slowly inside him. Joel wrapped his arms around Ed for support. Ed kissed him.
There was the sound of a condom wrapper opening and lube being procured. Joel gritted his teeth. He knew he just had to say no, say stop, he knew Chris would stop. Like a magic trick Chris made his fingers vanish and then magically replaced them in one quick thrust with his cock, long and thin like the rest of him. Joel cried and bit down on Ed’s shoulder, tears suddenly squeezing out of eyes determined to remain shut. Chris and Ed both let out long groans. Joel sucked in deep lungs of air trying to will his body to adjust, to relax. Ed worked one hand into his hair and gently rubbed while whispering softly words Joel didn’t understand. Joel found he did begin to relax.
Ed moved first, sliding out as much as he could, Chris following a moment later. Ed set the pace, slow and easy but faster than before, Chris mirroring each move just a second behind, like a physical echo. It didn’t take long however for it to become too much, even for Ed. The thrusts fell out of sync becoming hard and shallow pounding away.
Joel had been at the breaking point for too long and let out a sob of frustration desperate to cum. Chris’s long fingers wrapped around his cock and that’s all that was needed. Joel came, a scream ripped from his lungs, every muscle contracting starved for blood and oxygen, and each wave of pleasure and pain seemed to last forever.
Joel didn’t quite black out but came close. His head spun and he collapsed against Ed even as Chris and Ed cried out through their own orgasms.
‘Breathe.’ Joel ordered his body.
Chris recovered first and pulled out hopping off the bed. Joel fell backwards pulling himself off Ed in the process. The air was suddenly shockingly cold. Joel curled into a ball his whole body shaking. Ed stripped off his own condom and lay down next to Joel stroking his head.
“How ya doing, Joel?” Chris asked. Joel made a small noise. “Here, let’s clean you up.” Joel hissed and shivered harder as a cold damp cloth wiped the cum from his stomach and the lube from ass.
“Are you ok, Dr. Fleischman?” Ed asked softly. Joel opened his eyes and looked into Ed’s, that strange dark blue peering almost shyly out from under a mess of black hair.
‘Am I ok?’
Detached Joel finally spoke up.
“I am in a mild case of clinical shock, could someone please elevate my feet and keep me warm so I don’t die, thank you.”
Chris shoved a spare pillow under Joel’s feet and the furnace that was Ed snuggled in close and put a gentle kiss on Joel’s forehead.
“Well at least you haven’t run screaming into the night.” Chris said.
“Stevens, I have just lost a form of virginity in a manner befitting a porn star.” Joel mumbled out through thick lips. “I am not moving a muscle for at least half an hour.”
“Wouldn’t have pegged you for a cuddler, Joel.”
“Shut up and get back into bed and keep me warm so I don’t die.”
“As the doctor orders.” Chris crawled into bed and pulled a blanket over the three of them.
Joel dozed off hoping that he’d wake up again.
~
Joel cracked one eye open then another. The trailer was void of electric light but a full moon and the first flickering green aurora borealis of the season provided enough light to see by.
Joel did a personal once over. ‘Breathing steady. Pulse consistent. Body... Oh God.’
Sandwiched between Ed and Chris, both breathing softly, Joel was warm. The front of his body, pressed chest to chest with Ed was verging on hot but everything else... Joel hurt. His whole body ached like a repeat of the one bar fight he’d ever been in, right after med school. With one noticeable difference. Joel tried to clench his ass and instantly regretted it. The ache that shot through was impressive but at the same time Joel had a feeling it could be worse. Nothing felt torn but he’d have to take a look and that would be unpleasant.
Joel closed his eyes half tempted to try to go back to sleep but he felt a slight shift in Ed’s breathing. Joel opened his eyes again and found himself looking directly into Ed’s which looked black in the moon light. Ed lifted one hand and gently touched his fingers to Joel’s lips. Joel felt a sound leap from his throat. It was something between a gasp and a sob. The panic that should have probably kicked in earlier finally caught up.
Joel crawled over Chris, kicking him solidly in the ribs in the process, pulled on his pants, slipped his feet in his boots and pulled his jacket around himself without bothering to put on his shirt first. Joel gathered up his shirt, socks, tie and underwear and took the half step to the door. He cast a quick look back to the bed. Ed had scooted over so he was spooned along Chris and draped half over him. Both men were watching Joel intently but said nothing. They looked like they should be posing for some painting. ‘Angels of Temptation in Moonlight’. Joel opened the door and escaped into the night.
~
The clock in his cabin told him it wasn’t even ten yet. It was only the dark of the early Alaskan night that made if feel like it should be three or four in the morning. The first thing Joel was aware of when he got into his cabin was his stomach reminding him that he’d put off dinner for physical exertion. Joel found half an uneaten sandwich in the fridge and shoved it in his mouth before heading to his tiny bathroom. Joel stripped down for a second time that night, but this time looked at himself.
“Well...Fuck.”
Joel had to admit that he looked well and truly fucked. His hair was everywhere, his lips were swollen, there were finger bruises coming up on his hips and arms, some residual cum stuck to his stomach, and at some point apparently he had cried.
Joel found a hand mirror, abandoned by a previous renter, and contorted himself into a fairly uncomfortable position. What he saw disturbed him. He’d been called a tight ass most of his adult life and then some. He gently prodded and found his finger slipped easily in with hardly a shred of resistance. He poked around to see if he could feel any tearing. Joel had to admit Ed’s lengthy prep seemed to have saved him that particular problem then Joel brushed his own prostate. He jumped and dropped the mirror, chiding himself for being a superstitious idiot when he was glad it didn’t break. He also chided himself for the stir of arousal.
Joel hopped in the shower and scrubbed himself like he was prepping to do surgery naked.
‘You’re acting like you didn’t start it, Joel.’ A small voice in his head that sounded suspiciously like Elaine stated. ‘You kissed Chris and it was good. You kissed Ed and it was even better. You took them both and you never said stop and you enjoyed it. You have never cum that hard in your life and you know it.’
“Shut up.” Joel growled to himself out loud.
When the hot water ran out Joel fell into bed, face down, legs spread. The little voice in his head told him he should get used to that position. He told the little voice to shut up again and fell into a hard sleep.
~
Joel knew one of the things he didn’t like about Cicely was the complete lack of privacy. He knew in his heart that Ed had told no one and Chris had told no one. It wasn’t even hinted at or insinuated but a chickadee not yet bedded down for hibernation peeked through the dirty window of Chris’ trailer and saw something that blew its little birdie mind. It flew off and told a raven, that told a bear, that told Marilyn when she took out the trash in the morning and Marilyn didn’t tell a soul, she just thought about it while walking down the street and now the whole damn town knew. Joel was sure that’s the way it went.
He walked into his office. Marilyn smirked at him and blushed a little then went back to her knitting.
“What?” Joel asked in annoyance knowing exactly what.
“Nothing.” Marilyn replied in that slow controlled way of speaking she had.
“Have we got anyone this morning?”
“Not yet.”
“Ok. Well. I’ll be in my office.”
Joel wandered into his office and looked at the hard, wood chair behind his desk. The drive into town had been bad enough. Joel flipped on the radio. Chris was going through a bit of a classic folk rock phase and Bob Dylan was playing.
“Fleischman!” Joel spun around at Maurice’s bellow as he stormed into the office. “Fleischman.” He barked again.
“Good morning Maurice. What can I do for you?”
“Fleischman, I have heard a very disturbing rumor this morning.”
“Really?”
“I have heard that you have become… a raging homosexual.”
Joel perched on his desk, schooling his features against the discomfort, and crossed his legs in a manner he hoped would come across as a little coy.
“And if I said yes would you let me out of my contract?”
“Hell no!” Maurice bellowed again.
“Then I really don’t see how it matters any which way.”
Maurice turned a few interesting shades of red and shook his finger at Joel. “I’m keeping an eye on you Fleischman.”
Joel smiled. “Well enjoy the view, Maurice.” Maurice shook his finger again and stormed out.
The song finished on the radio. “And this next one goes out to our own Dr. F from the great S and G. A little something to remind you of the Big A.” Guitar cords faded up. “Tom get your plain right on time...”
Joel began to laugh. He felt the laugh well up in him and spill out across the room as Paul Simon sung about being the only living boy in New York and insisted he had nothing to do but smile. Joel laughed until he cried and then he laughed again, feeling that for some strange reason he too had nothing to do but smile.