Back on the WWagon
Why do I not like writing about writing? In other writer's blogs, they tap-tap-tap about the tap-tap-tapping. I'm sure they not only savor it, but they also have fans who want the tap-tap-tapping porn. If I ever develop a large following, I'll probably come off as an authorial prude, not even flashing a nipple.
Or The Tap Nazi. "No tapping for you!"
Instead, I'll tap about mundane shit like Weight Watchers. I started it again last week, just the online program. This time, the first week was a lot easier. The last time I wound up starting the week before my mother died. I was hungry all the time and ultimately didn't lose a pound, probably due to stress. (Ya think?) That sucked raw donkey dongs. I'll weigh myself tomorrow morning and see what happens. I'd decided to give it another go because I was having bad hypoglycemia at night, which usually happens when the scale hits a certain weight.
Meanwhile, something small yet unbelievably awesome happened at work. Check out my new badge:
Arkham, MA
WHERE DREAMS COME TRUE
Yes, Cthulhu's dreams -- HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
We were getting all new badges. When our administrative assistant asked us for our hometown, I said nuh uh and gave her Arkham, MA. My VP, however, is a massive geek. Like, he has the coolest animated cell thingy of all the female villains in Batman on the wall in his office. It's all I can do not to lick it every time I have a meeting with him. So when he reviewed the list of information he of course noticed what I'd done.
He asked me to submit the real information. I said, "No way! I don't want anyone knowing where I was born." Mind you, this was around the time I was battling dopplegangers on my credit reports and had battled identity theft the year before that. He agreed that was invasive and suggested that I give my city of residence. I had the same objections. He then said, "How about Los Angeles, CA? It's just a region, really." I grudgingly agreed it was okay to change it to that.
I had a sad. But not anymore.
Either there was a simple clerical error or my VP had a change of heart. Either way, I have the coolest badge in all of Innsmouse.
Or The Tap Nazi. "No tapping for you!"
Instead, I'll tap about mundane shit like Weight Watchers. I started it again last week, just the online program. This time, the first week was a lot easier. The last time I wound up starting the week before my mother died. I was hungry all the time and ultimately didn't lose a pound, probably due to stress. (Ya think?) That sucked raw donkey dongs. I'll weigh myself tomorrow morning and see what happens. I'd decided to give it another go because I was having bad hypoglycemia at night, which usually happens when the scale hits a certain weight.
Meanwhile, something small yet unbelievably awesome happened at work. Check out my new badge:
Arkham, MA
WHERE DREAMS COME TRUE
Yes, Cthulhu's dreams -- HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
We were getting all new badges. When our administrative assistant asked us for our hometown, I said nuh uh and gave her Arkham, MA. My VP, however, is a massive geek. Like, he has the coolest animated cell thingy of all the female villains in Batman on the wall in his office. It's all I can do not to lick it every time I have a meeting with him. So when he reviewed the list of information he of course noticed what I'd done.
He asked me to submit the real information. I said, "No way! I don't want anyone knowing where I was born." Mind you, this was around the time I was battling dopplegangers on my credit reports and had battled identity theft the year before that. He agreed that was invasive and suggested that I give my city of residence. I had the same objections. He then said, "How about Los Angeles, CA? It's just a region, really." I grudgingly agreed it was okay to change it to that.
I had a sad. But not anymore.
Either there was a simple clerical error or my VP had a change of heart. Either way, I have the coolest badge in all of Innsmouse.