Title: No Pants O’Clock
Pair: Finn/Kurt, unrequited
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: ~1670
Summary: Post S3 Finale.
Finn and Kurt’s A/C breaks in their New York apartment. Finn lusts inappropriately over Kurt’s unintentional sexiness and awkwardness ensues.
For
finnkurt's
Summer Prompt meme “The next time some right wing ideologue tells me that there is no climate change, I swear I’m gonna...” Kurt fanned his face, and in a desperate move, shucked off his vest and loosened his breezy white and yellow summer scarf.
“What?” Finn’s eyes trailed down the line of sweat staining the back of Kurt’s turquoise and black striped tank top... Maybe if he didn’t have the long sleeved shirt on underneath? So many layers! Finn had never actually seen Kurt sweating through his clothes though. Not when they weren’t practicing dance moves. He was always... composed. “What’s and idea... ideo...?”
“Ideologue. It’s...” Kurt opened the fridge and stuck his head in. Their A/C had been out for three days, and their first New York summer was slapping them with a serious heatwave. “Uggghhh.... An ideologue is like... someone who blindly and aggressively advocates a certain belief system.”
“Huh. They have a word for everything, don’t they?”
“They have many, many words.” Kurt sagged into the refrigerator.
Finn was trying to keep his eyes off of how Kurt’s clothes clung to his back, suggesting the shape of muscles underneath, but it wasn’t working. Nine months after washing out of boot camp and six after breaking up with Rachel for the last time, and Finn Hudson had gone totally queer for his brother.
Maybe it was the heat.
“I’m taking off my pants,” Kurt declared.
Finn sat up straight, holding his legs close together. Kurt moved away from the fridge and ruffled his sweaty hair. Even his Rue La La acquired hair products couldn’t withstand the weathery onslaught.
“You... You’re gonna...?”
Kurt wiggled around, taking his shirt off underneath his tank top. “I’ll hang out in my room, if it makes you uncomfortable.”
“What... uh...”
“Me traipsing around in my undies.”
“All the fans are in here, though...” Finn realized he should just take the out, but he couldn’t stop staring at Kurt’s moving biceps. He was sleek and slick all over.
The first time he’d really noticed Kurt had been after one of Kurt’s cabaret performances. He might have been denied the school of his dreams, but a little thing like that wouldn’t keep Kurt Hummel from performing. He’d come home, exhausted but lit up from the positive reaction of the crowd, and his outfit had experienced a malfunction. The pants were still tight as hell, but one strap of the weird body suit was busted, and his hair looked like hands had been running through it... The whole thing made Finn imagine Kurt’s club as a big gay orgy.
Ugh. There was just something about the look and scent of Kurt when he was in disarray. His hair out of place, his body slick with sweat, that look he got when he was really pissed off, or when he just got emotionally overwhelmed. Kurt losing control a little made Finn lose control a lot.
Finn turned his head as Kurt started to unbuckle, but he didn’t have the strength for long. His eyes drifted back, and he saw the unveiling of long dancer’s legs. Firm legs that grew slightly thicker at his upper thighs, and rounded into a plump, apple bottom. Finn imagined it was tight, but just supple enough to squeeze. That ass had powers. Finn was sure of it. His eyes gravitated towards that ass even when Kurt was fully clothed or wearing something that looked like a crazy sky-diving jumpsuit.
Now his crisp yellow pants were folded on top of his discarded linen shirt and vest, leaving his ass swaddled tightly in turquoise cotton briefs.
“Dude. Did you coordinate your tank and your underwear? Was it turquoise day at work?”
“What?” Kurt put a hand on his hip. “Finn, this is pagoda blue.” He looked down and tilted his head slightly. “Huh. They do kind of match.”
“Yeah.” Finn let out a big sigh.
“I promise not to look.” Kurt bent over to pick up his clothes.
Finn felt his stomach growing tighter... as well as his pants. But he couldn’t force himself not to look at Kurt bending over. “Uh... what?”
“I know you’re hot. I promise not to look if you want to take off your pants, as well.” Kurt walked past Finn toward his room to put his clothes away. “It’s your apartment, too!”
“Oh. Um.” Finn rubbed a hand over his head, then got up to abuse the freezer himself. He took out some ice and rubbed it on his head and neck. He was just considering shoving it down his pants, when Kurt returned with his laptop and messenger bag and sat on the futon.
“I have some homework to do. Or I’d suggest we just get out of here and go steal air conditioning from some or anyone.” Kurt rubbed his brow and shook his head. “Maybe under the pretense of nursing a cup of coffee. Iced.”
“Yeah...” Finn filled up a glass of water, then dropped some ice in it. He turned toward the counter as he drank it. Behind him, Kurt’s fingers flew away at the keys, pausing every so often as he checked a book.
“Why are you studying in the summer?” Finn asked.
“Because I want to finish college while I still have my hair... And core classes are a dreary waste of a full semester.”
Finn bit his lip and peeked back at Kurt. His bare legs hung out from under his laptop. Then, he folded one underneath him and the other danced a little as he leaned over the computer, concentrating.
How could he be so adorable and sexy at the same time? The white flesh of his thigh pressed into the futon. Finn wanted to pinch it.
He looked away again.
A few minutes later, Finn noticed that the apartment had gone quiet. He turned around halfway. Kurt was looking up from his laptop.
“Hey. Are you okay?” His chin tilted upward.
“Just, uh, overheated. I guess.” Finn let out another sigh and knocked back the rest of his water.
“Maybe take a shower? It’ll keep you cool for a couple of minutes.”
Finn nodded. “I wanna wait. I don’t wanna run up our water bill.”
“Really. Otherwise I’d be taking three a day.” Kurt bowed over the screen again and pulled on the back of his tank top, which was sticking to his neck. His cheeks were flushed, like... like... when he and Blaine came out of a locked room together.
Finn opened the freezer again, then grabbed a pint of soy ice cream and some spoons and came over to Kurt. “Cool down, break!”
Kurt’s mouth turned into a little “o,” and he shook his head. “Oh, nooo. I don’t want Blaine to come visit and I can’t fit in my jeans!”
“You’ll fit in your jeans. What are you talking about?” Finn opened up the ice cream and dug in a spoon.
“Freshman fifteen, Finn!” Kurt snapped.
“You’re crazy. You haven’t gained any weight.”
Kurt pushed out his lower lip. “It’s all in my truck butt.”
“I like your truck butt!”
Kurt looked at him with wide, surprised eyes.
Finn kind of felt like a creep, Kurt looked so hurt. He should have remembered to be careful about those self-directed jokes. “I, uh, I mean... You’re fine! I’m sure Blaine likes ‘em like... that...”
Ugh. Even better. He should’ve just shut up.
“Like... a truck?” Kurt cocked a brow.
“Don’t gay guys, um, like the ass?”
Kurt’s eyes narrowed, and his head tilted far to the side. There was something in his lips. The way they strained not to curve upward, trying not to smile. Finn knew Kurt’s sense of humor had saved him.
“I’m beginning to see why Rachel dumped you this time around.”
Finn looked down and crooked his mouth to the right sheepishly. Kurt grabbed a spoon, rolled his eyes and dug out some mocha almond fudge.
“You’re killing me, here,” Kurt muttered.
“Uh huh.” Finn’s brain left the station as Kurt slooowly licked the sides of the spoon, then took the spoon into his mouth, shaping the ice cream as he pulled it out. Then in it went again, and Kurt sucked on the spoon.
Finn abandoned the ice cream on the coffee table and stood up quickly. Kurt’s eyes flickered upward, and the spoon was still in his mouth.
“Um. Shower.”
“Okay,” Kurt replied in a high, gentle voice.
Finn turned away to return his spoon to the kitchen. Mostly so Kurt couldn’t see the super boner that he had going.
“Don’t you want any ice cream?” Kurt asked.
“Nah. Um. That’s your brand, anyway.”
“You’re welcome to have some.”
“No, um. I’m gonna take a shower.” Finn turned his head slightly. “You’re fine, y’know. Tell me you know that, Kurt. This thing about you gaining weight, it’s in your head. I think you look great.”
Kurt shook his head and pressed his lips together in a sweet, but not quite believing smile. “Thanks. Well, if you get out and you’re still hot, I declare it ‘No Pants O’Clock’ for the rest of the evening. Unless our landlord decides to not be a jackass and get out here to fix the A/C.”
Finn nodded and hurried into the other room. He grabbed some clothes and looked at Kurt sneakily from the hall. He was laying back, hand mussing his hair, like he was thinking deeply. Then he leaned over and took another spoonful of ice cream, which he would then proceed to eat like he was giving it head.
AHHHHHHH!
Finn ducked into the bathroom. Where he would be thinking of Kurt eating ice cream for at least the next fifteen minutes.
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