The House of the Rising Sun, Chapter Ten

[ladydeathfaerie]

Title: House of the Rising Sun
Fandoms: a cross over between Marvel's X-Men(to some degree) Universe and the Anita Blake Universe
Rating: no one under 18. there will be blood and gore, sex and violence. dirty language and whatever else i feel like tossing in here.
Warning: as i said, sex and violence and dirty words. said sex will include, but not be limited to, M/F, M/M, M/F/F, F/F, M/M/F and probably any other combination i can work out. weak stomach, not my fault. you have been warned.
Disclaimer: i do not own anyone from the Marvel universe. i do not own anyone from the Anita Blake universe. i don't even own Gin. i'm lucky to own myself. i swear i'm not making any money from this. i just do what the sick voices inside my head tell me to. i write purely for my enjoyment. and possibly the comments. please don't sue, harass or bother me. i have no money to pay you, but i do have a really nasty temper. and i know some good cuss words.

Author's Notes: firstly, i'm sorry this took a freaking year to get to. i'll try not to do that again. secondly... this went a little weird for me. i think. i'm not sure. but i don't feel like going back through and ripping out a few thousand words and redoing the whole fucking thing.

The House of the Rising Sun: The Index

He was gone when she woke up. She'd known he would be. Since finding him back, since discovering that he'd been turned, he'd never been there in the morning. And even though he'd been gone when she'd woken up when they'd been with Belladonna, she'd at least known where to find him. There'd been times she'd checked in on him in the middle of the day, just to be sure he'd been there and set her mind at ease. In this strange new place, she had no idea where to find him. Some instinct told her that no one would allow her to go looking for him.

Worse than that, though, was the fact that she didn't even know if he was going to come back.

Remy had been a very thorough lover last night. Even if his attention had been focused on one of them, his hands had proved to have minds of their own. More of than not, they'd been stroking over the skin of whichever of them he wasn't involved in. They'd been so intent in their passions that they'd gotten lost in one another until dawn. And there'd been an air of melancholy that had hung on the air around them. No one had said anything about it, but it had been there. It was still there in the light of day or whenever it was, clinging to them.

Jo glanced at the other woman in the bed, noticing that Gin was still lost in slumber. Loathe to disturb her, she slid silently from the bed and padded across plush carpeting into the bathroom. Heaving a sigh, she stopped to look at herself in the mirror. She still looked like death warmed over. Her skin was so pale, it made the myriad of bruises stand out that much more. And there were plenty.

Her throat, her face, her ribs. Up and down her arms. Not even Todd had bruised her like this. One hand reached up to feel the back of her head. There was a tender spot there where it had hit the wall in Belladonna's lair. Gin had told her she should have died. Why hadn't she? Her fingers traced the spot again. It felt like a bruise that was a week old. Not a dent that was only a few days old. Why was it healing so rapidly?

Remy had done something, but even he didn't know what. And now the only person she could ask had more or less told her that he owned her. The same way Belladonna had owned her. Out of the frying pan. They weren't safe. They'd traded one prison for another. And she was going to end up being used by yet another vampire. What had she ever done to deserve this shit?

Okay. Don't answer that. She knew what she'd done. She'd been horrible to her parents. And a lot of other people. But did that warrant being made a play toy to the undead? Even if the prison this one had given her was nicer than the last, it was still a prison. He might not make her draw people in for nefarious purposes the way Belladonna had, but he'd use her just the same.

Her hands were busy turning the knobs on the tub, setting the water for a bath that she hoped would make her feel just the slightest bit better. Maybe washing the stink of New Orleans from her skin would help. Maybe she could forget everything.

Her mind wouldn't let her do such a thing. Even as she went through the process of lathering her hair, her brain kept whirling, kept thinking of the things that her new jailor could force her to do. And he would. It was in his nature. With exception of Remy, vampires were all the same.

That part of her that Gin liked to call her Spidey sense told her that it wasn't true, that her new master wouldn't be as horrible as Belladonna. She tried not to listen to it but it was insistent. And it had never steered her wrong before. Much against her will, she recalled that he hadn't tried to touch her last night, that he'd been a perfect gentleman. And Remy had told her and Gin that he thought they could trust the other vampire.

Maybe some part of her knew all of that. Deep down, some piece of her recognized that a monster would never look upon the scarred face of the golden haired vampire with anything other than contempt and hate. But she'd watched him look lovingly upon the other man, as if he didn't see the scars. She hadn't seen them herself. But she'd known they were there. It was written all over the way he held himself, the way he regarded strangers. The ball of anger and fear and despair that lived deep in his belly. His scars were as much physical as they were emotional.

If she was being honest with herself, she hadn't sensed any kind of fear on any of the people present at the party last night. No one had felt as if they were being forced to attend. Everyone had felt at ease, though at ease meant something different for each of them. It seemed as if the mix of vampires, lycanthropes and humans all got on well. Maybe, if she wasn't so emotionally fucked up, she would find a way to enjoy this place.

But the truth was, she was fucked up. Belladonna had seen to it. Not personally. No. That privilege had been given to Darious. And he'd taken great joy in twisting her up inside. He'd told her everything he was going to do to her in that ruined voice of his, then he'd done it. And he'd talked about it further, until she'd felt as if she could still hear him whispering to her in her sleep. The things he'd done to her... She hadn't told Gin. Or Remy. Because she'd been ashamed.

And those things had left her so fucked in the head, she didn't see any way that it would change.

She'd wanted to believe Jean Claude last night. She'd wanted to believe every word he'd said to her. She needed to believe that he wouldn't hurt her, that none of his people would hurt her. But she just couldn't. Darious' voice still whispered in the back of her brain, laughed as it told her in great detail what he wanted to do to her. It lived there, made her afraid to trust her own instincts. Just plain made her afraid. She hated him for doing that to her. More than that, she hated herself for allowing it to happen.

Were they safe here? Was she safe here? Would it be a repeat of what had gone on in New Orleans? She hoped not. She hoped it would be different. Part of her said it would. But that part was overruled by the fear and the anger. The hatred. She wanted nothing to do with the vampires or the lycanthropes. Time spent with Belladonna and her twisted little family had cured her of any romantic notions she'd ever carried about them. She wished she could take Remy and Gin and run, go somewhere where no one would be able to find them.

She wanted to pretend that the past month of her life hadn't ever happened.

Climbing from the tub, she dragged a towel from the cabinet and wrapped it around her hair. Then she used a second to buff her skin dry. She should have been a little more careful because her brusque actions pulled softened scabs and left a few of the deeper wounds bleeding. She muttered a curse under her breath and used the thick, fluffy towels to dab at the scratches and bites until the crimson liquid stopped oozing out of them. After making sure she wasn't leaking any further, she draped the towels over the bar and headed out into the other room to find clothes.

Gin was still sleeping, which she found mildly surprising. Then again, Gin hadn't been the one who'd spent the more of the past twenty four hours sleeping than awake. Jo opened the drawers silently and picked out something to wear. A pair of jeans and a flannel shirt were the best anyone around this place was going to get. She was back in the bathroom, combing her hair before the mirror, when she finally heard Gin stir.

"Jo?" Her friend's voice was heavy with sleep.

"I'm here," she called before setting the brush down and exiting the bathroom. Gin stared at her with bleary eyes, then managed a smile. Anything else the woman might have said was cut off by the loud rumble of her stomach. Gin laughed and shook her head.

"It sounds like you're ready for breakfast. Let me get dressed and we'll see if I can't find some food."

"I'm sure there's a fast food place around here somewhere. It isn't like we're in the middle of Bum Fuck Egypt. All we have to do is find a place."

Gin rolled her eyes. "Do you really think that our new master is going to let us run amok without some kind of escort?" Jo snorted out her opinion on the subject and went looking for shoes and socks. Gin crossed to the bathroom, continuing as she did so. "Besides, we don't have any money."

"Fine. I'll give a blow job for an egg McMuffin. It isn't like that would be the worst thing I've ever done." There was cold bitterness in her words. She heard Gin's sigh all the way from the bathroom.

"You need to try to be grateful. He didn't have to take us in. He could have left us to Belladonna. And what do you suppose she would have done to us after the crap that happened? Don't rock the boat here, Jo. Please."

"I can't make that promise and you know it. As long as he fucking leaves me alone and he doesn't hurt Remy, we'll be about as peachy as we can get." If he hurt Remy... Well, there'd be another name added to her hit list. Before Gin could say anything else, there was a knock at the door that let them know they were no longer alone. Jo answered it and found the blonde from yesterday standing there, along with the three human women from the party. She sighed and debated if she could get away with just shutting the door. She wasn't ready to be Susie Sunshine yet.

"Who is it?" Gin called. Her voice echoed out of the bathroom a moment before she turned on the tap.

"Its the welcoming committee." She turned away from the door and went to sit in a chair. The four of them filed in silently, the last one in the row making sure to shut the door behind her. Jo mentally went down the line and ticked off names. There was Jason, the young werewolf who'd made Gin feel more at ease. Kimberly, the woman who helped manage the Circus. The other brunette was Susan, the seamstress who'd looked positively pleased at the idea of making clothes for them. And the redhead. Amanda. The one who breathed fire and played pin cushion for one of the blood suckers. Yippee. A whole group of vampire fans. Be still her beating heart.

"We've come to get you for breakfast. Or lunch. However you look at it," Jason told Gin. He was all boundless energy, the kind of never ending, always moving energy that she knew was unique to a shapeshifter. There was a sense of anticipation to him, as if he was looking forward to something. Curious. Jo turned her attention to the three women with him.

Kimberly was a sea of calm, her energy soothing as Jo let her senses run over it. Just touching her made the anger inside ebb and pull back, as if it was folding away. Despite the warmth that came from touching the other woman, the sense of peace that washed over her, Jo wasn't ready to let go of her anger yet. It was all she had to keep herself from losing what little was left of who she'd been before the nightmare had started. She pulled away and moved on to the next woman.

Susan was filled with excitement, her energy vibrating around her. It wasn't as strong or intense as the energy that came off of a lycanthrope, but it was enough to leave Jo wondering what it was that had the woman feeling that way. The anticipation was confusing. Jo pulled back from that sensation, too, and gave her attention to the last member of the little group.

Amanda was seemingly calm on the surface. But there was something underneath that suggested she wasn't the happy go lucky person she'd made herself out to be last night. Something had happened to her in her past that weighed on her heavily, something that she kept locked up inside. Jo would hazard a guess and say that she'd never told anyone about it, that she'd kept whatever it was all to herself. That small bit of sorrow hidden under such a gay exterior made Jo like her just a little more than before.

"I hope you guys are hungry. There's a veritable feast set up in your honor," Kimberly told them.

"There was no need to go to all the trouble. Just point me in the direction of a McDonald's and I'll score us some breakfast. I need a pair of knee pads, though, since I don't have any cash." All four of them stared at her as if they'd never seen her before. "What? Don't tell me no one here has ever given head for a McMuffin?"

"I wish I could say she was kidding," Gin told them as she stepped out of the bathroom, wrapped up in a black silk robe that must have been hanging in there. She headed for the dresser. "But she isn't. Junior year of high school. Her parents kicked her out the night before for disobedience. The manager of the local McDonald's told her to come back anytime."

Everyone shot a look at Jo. She simply stared back.

"Let me get dressed, then we'll go eat something."

~*~

Kimberly hadn't been lying. The table had been long and piled high with food. All kinds of food. Jo had watched Gin dig in, noting that her appetite had already started changing. It had left Jo feeling even less pleased with their situation than she had when she'd woken that morning. She'd picked at her food and only contributed to the conversation when it was required of her.

After a leisurely breakfast, Jason escorted them into a room that contained bolts of material, several sewing machines and a pair of dress maker's dummies. Susan explained, with a twinkle in her eye and a broad smile on her face, that Jean Claude had spoken to her the night before about making a wardrobe for them. Then she'd whipped out a measuring tape and put it places where nothing but Remy's hands belonged. Jo'd suffered through it, the entire time thinking to herself that she wasn't about to wear anything that he'd had made for her.

When the questions had ended, they'd parted ways. Amanda and Kimberly had claimed they needed to get ready for the evening's festivities at the Circus. Both had said they'd see them again. Susan had thrown herself into her work, hand flying over a sketch pad as she'd begun designing the requested wardrobe. That had left Jo alone with Gin and Jason. And he'd suggested they go take a look at the facilities on hand for new lycanthropes.

The house was out of the city proper. It was well cared for, though it didn't seem as if anyone actually lived there. The main level looked like any other family residence she'd ever been in, with a living room and a family room, a kitchen and dining room, as well as a pair of bedrooms and a bathroom. There was a door in the kitchen that, when opened, showed a stairwell that descended down into the basement. That was the last place that Jason took them.

The basement was divided into two parts. One side was walled with wood paneling and had comfortable looking furnishings in it. There was a television, a small refrigerator and a microwave. It looked like a frat house living room. With exception of the door in the middle of one wall. Jason led them through to show them that there was a long hallway lined with at least half a dozen doors. The area must have gone past the house's exterior walls and had obviously been added on after the fact. All of the doors stood open. Jason showed them into the first one.

"This is one of the reinforced rooms we have for new lycanthropes to use when going through their first change or so. You can see that the walls are lined with steel. Under that is a layer of silver that keeps them from..."

"What is this?" Jo asked, the control on her temper slipping at the sight of the room. Both Jason and Gin turned to look at her. Even before she could say anything else, Gin was heading for her. As if closing in on her could head off her words. Jo ignored her, stepping around her so that she could advance on Jason. "What the ever loving fuck is this? You can't seriously plan on putting Gin in here!"

Jason stared at her as if he hadn't expected such a reaction. Chances are that he hadn't. "Its the safest place for her to be during the full moon."

"In a cage? Like an animal? No. Absolutely not. I won't allow it."

"Jo, it isn't what you think. This is a good place for any new lycanthrope. There's forest land behind the house and there's a barn connected to this wing by an underground tunnel. The barn holds sheep and goats that can be brought up here for the newly shifted to feed on." She took note of the soft tone Jason used, as if he thought he was trying to soothe a mad woman. That, and his words, only served to anger her further.

"Feed on? She's not an animal! You are not going to keep her in one of these rooms like she's some kind of criminal."

"Jo, please don't be stubborn about this. You saw what Dmitri and Ivan were like. What all of them were like," Gin said softly. Jo turned to glare at her, unwilling to accept that this was her friend's fate. "I don't want to be like that when I change. I don't want to hurt anyone. I don't want to kill anyone."

"You won't. I know you won't." Just thinking about Gin in one of these rooms, some wild beast clawing at the walls in an effort to get out, left her feeling lost. As if everything was out of control and she was the only one who could make it right. Only she couldn't even control herself. She forced herself to keep the tears at bay by sheer will power. "You aren't like them. You never will be. You don't need this. Remy and I..."

She fell silent when Gin shook her head. The look on Jason's face was filled with pity. It was the look that doctors and nurses and police used when they'd just told a person that their loved one had died and that person didn't want to believe them. "I don't want to hurt either one of you, Jo. This has to be done. I need to be away from everyone until I can control it. I need you to be safe."

It was the look in her eyes that did Jo in. The sorrow and acceptance she saw in her friend's face. This was going to happen, whether she liked it or not. And nothing Jo could say or do would stop it. Nothing would keep Gin out of one of these rooms. Come the next full moon, Gin was going to go all furry.

Everything she'd done... Everything she'd gone through. It was all for nothing. The vampires had lied to her, had used her and abused her and they'd lied to her. Worst of all, she'd believed them even though she'd known in her heart that they were lying. That Darious had lied. She'd believed because she'd wanted Gin to be okay.

Her breakfast, which had sat like a heavy weight in her stomach all morning, roiled ominously. She had to get out of there, had to get away from the truth before she lost her lunch. Jo turned and stalked from the room, all of her attention focused on making it upstairs without throwing everything up. Her feet pounded against the stairs as she raced for the upper level. They didn't stop when she got there. They didn't stop until she was outside, almost running up the driveway.

They didn't stop until Jason caught her and brought her to a stand still. She wanted to fight his hold, wanted to break away and keep running. But she couldn't do either. Couldn't get away from him anymore than she could get away from the truth. She sagged in his arms, trying to draw air into her lungs. He didn't tighten his hold on her, simply held her while she sobbed.

When she was spent, when she hung limply in his embrace, the heat of his body wrapping around her with the promise of peace, Jason tugged her closer to him. It was a gentle kind of hold, one meant to comfort. One that said he understood better than she could imagine. It was such a non-threatening hold, the kind she'd only ever gotten from Remy. Everyone else, every member of Bella's kiss and every single one of her lycanthropes, had held her in a strong grip. Held her like the prisoner she had been. She'd hated every last one of them, wanted nothing more than to see them dead and buried.

Maybe, if someone other than Remy had showed her... them this kindness, maybe they both wouldn't be so fucked up.

"I know you went through hell," he said, voice soft and tender. One hand reached up and lightly stroked her hair, an absent move meant to soothe. The way one would with a frightened puppy. "I know that things are totally fucked up and you don't know up from down. You've gone from one vampire lair to another and you can't be sure who is and isn't a friend. All you think you have are Remy and Gin. This is hard for you."

He paused, turning her in his arms so that he could look her in the eye. She could see regret and understanding on his face. And some knowledge that went deep, that made him seem suddenly much older and much more knowledgeable than he'd first appeared. "I know this is hard for you. But its that much harder for Gin. Do you think she wants to be here? Do you really think she wants this? How do you think she'd feel if she hurt you? Or Remy? This isn't the best solution, but its the safest. And it isn't permanent. Once she's learned control, it'll be different."

No it wouldn't. It wouldn't be different. Not for her. She'd still be the odd one out. Gin would belong somewhere. Remy would belong somewhere. Somewhere that she didn't. Somewhere that they could go that would leave her on the outside.

She felt Gin's approach long before her friend arrived. It gave Jo the chance to gather up every last thing she felt and wall it up behind bricks and mortar. She hid it all away, unwilling to add any further guilt to what the other woman already felt. It wasn't fair of her to allow her own fears and insecurities to make a difficult situation worse. By the time Gin stood just behind Jason, Jo was pulling herself from his embrace. She offered her friend a faint smile.

"I'm sorry. I know this is hard but..." Gin began. Jo shook her head.

"Don't mind me. I'm probably just suffering from PMS or something. Whatever you think is best," she replied. Gin looked at her curiously, as if she wanted to debate the statement. But she finally shrugged and let it go. "Why don't you and Jason finish the tour? I'll sit in the car and wait for you."

"I want you to see this with me," Gin replied.

"If you want me to accept this as gracefully as I'm capable, I can't see anymore. I don't want to know. Don't ask me," she said, voice quiet and firm.

"I'm supposed to keep an eye on both of you," Jason admitted. Jo frowned.

"You have my word that I won't go anywhere. Just don't make me go back inside." Gin turned a look on Jason, a silent plea. He glanced back and forth between the two of them for a while before heaving a sigh and unlocking the car door. Jo shot a grateful smile at him as he pocketed the keys.

"We won't be much longer, Jo. There's just a little more for her to see, then we'll be on our way back to the Circus. Its getting close to dark and the show's going to start soon. You're going to want to see the show."

"Can't wait," Jo told him, her tone suggesting the exact opposite. He chuckled and motioned for Gin to head back up to the house. They both cast a look back at her before starting for the house once more. Jo opened the door and climbed inside. A chuckle rumbled up her throat.

She could just picture the look on Jason's face when Gin told him that she knew how to hot wire a car.

~*~*~*~*~

Kimberly met them at the door when they stepped into the Circus. Gin was walking next to Jason while Jo hung back, letting her senses reach out to touch everyone around them. There seemed to be a uniform feel of excitement and pleasure spilling out of everyone. They all must have been enjoying themselves at the freak show that passed for a vampire circus. Since being kidnapped, she'd never completely closed herself off from her surroundings, always searching for the chaotic, painful energy that said lycanthrope or the cool, dead sensation that mean vampire. It had kept her from being surprised more than once and she wasn't so foolish that she thought she wouldn't need such a security blanket in this place.

The air was crowded with scents and sounds that assaulted them from every corner. The call of the barkers, trying to lure people in to play their games, mingled with the raucous laughter of the patrons and the slightly sinister sounding carnival music that was universal to any circus. Children begged their parents for this or that, then cried when they didn't get it. Conversations in the dozens floated past her ears as Kimberly led them from one place to the next. Cotton candy and popcorn, traditional circus fare, clung to her nose, as did the smell of hot dogs and pretzels and french fries. Underneath it all, found in patches here or there, was the nose ruffling scent of lycanthropes. And the smell of vampires and old blood.

What a place to take one's children.

Every so often, her sixth sense slid over a pocket of the chaotic and she would casually find the source, memorizing the face of the shifter before letting her eyes slip away from them. Or she'd find an almost dead space that meant vampire and her eyes would track the owner until she was sure that the undead wasn't trying to sneak up on her. Most of those she saw who were shifters or vamps looked as if they were employed at the Circus somehow, but a few appeared to be just visiting. It set Jo on edge, prompting her to inch closer to Jason. If he noticed, he said nothing.

"I've been saving the best for last," Kimberly announced as they approached an honest to Gods big top tent. The brunette led them past a long line of people waiting to get in to see the main show. Jo noticed more than one unfriendly look, but no one said anything. When they reached the ticket taker, the young vampire looked at them, then nodded his head and motioned them through the opening in the tent walls.

The four of them stood at the top of a set of steps that dropped down into the seating area. There was a large arena at the bottom, a permanent wall erected around it to keep the spectators from getting too close to the acts. The seats were filling up fast, though there was a small section down at the bottom that seemed to be empty. Kimberly started down the steps, obviously expecting them to follow after. Once again, Jo brought up the rear, her senses feeding her nothing but anticipation.

They four of them had ring side seats. The show hadn't yet started, so she tuned out the presence of people around her and focused on the emotions flowing around her. Nothing seemed out of place, nothing that spoke of intense fear or rage or hatred. Just more of that anticipation, a growing finger of eagerness that seemed made of streamers of yellows in different shades. It was working its way around the entire arena, building and doubling with each new person to take a seat in the stands.

The show started with a roar of the crowd as vampires dressed as clowns stumbled out into the ring. The heavy pancake makeup seemed a mockery against skin that was already deathly white. But the patrons laughed and cheered as the undead clowns bumbled around the ring for fifteen or twenty minutes, playing at the same pranks and tricks that living clowns did.

A knife throwing act took the center of the ring, the vampire clowns slipping away as if they were nothing more than mist in the night. She found herself interested in the knife throwers, though she was sure that they were very accomplished. She'd never really enjoyed the circus, had always found it boring. It didn't matter that this one was owned by a vampire and the acts were... unique. She was still bored to tears.

A variety of acts took their turn in the ring, winning applause and a chorus of 'oohs' and 'aahs' from the crowd. Jo considered going to sleep but felt that it would earn her some kind of retribution from one of the vampire acts. She feigned being attentive, all the while that part of her keeping a metaphysical eye out on the shifting energies around her. That was how she knew when the vampire joined them.

It was the blonde vampire, the one she'd noticed last night. The one who felt as raw on the inside as she did. He settled down beside her without a word, his attention given to the act currently occupying the arena. Instinct had her wanting to inch closer to Gin on her other side, but she held herself still. She didn't want to be the source of amusement for one of the blood suckers. His energy was calm, almost serene, his body relaxed and almost welcoming. She puzzled at that for a few moments until her head started to pound. Then she simply let it go and watched as the act in the ring changed yet again.

She recognized the brilliant red hair of Amanda, the woman who'd claimed shamelessly last night that she ate fire. She wore a costume of white that had a few panels of sheer white material in it. It also had flames spreading across it, done in sequins of red and orange and yellow. She wore white fishnet tights with a pair of white patent leather boots with four inch heels that reached her thighs. How the woman walked in them across the sandy ring was beyond Jo.

A trio of muscular, tanned and oiled young men followed after her with all of her equipment. There were buckets and towels, bottles and long metal skewers with balls on the top. They helped her prepare for her act, each one offering her something different. One handed her a blue bottle, which she took a drink from. Another handed her a flaming skewer. The flames shot some five feet into the air before arcing toward the ground in fiery little drops that died before even reaching the earth.

Each one of them moved with an innate sensualness that hinted at the idea that the four of them were lovers. Each move one of them made was in tune with the moves of everyone else in the group, making it look as if they were of one mind. Despite her boredom with everything else, Jo was fascinated by Amanda's act and watched, totally entranced, as she worked her way through her routine.

As Amanda was walking out of the ring, Asher leaned across her lap toward Kimberly. Jo found herself rooted to the spot, afraid to move away. Even more, she was afraid of leaning into him. Some part of her wanted to reach out and touch him so desperately that she had to remind herself she was afraid of the vampires. That she hated them and wanted nothing to do with them.

Why was he so different?

"Jean Claude wishes to speak to Ginette and Jocelyn. I will require you to take over running the Circus tonight. I will be busy." Kimberly nodded at him and rose to her feet. She offered a smile to the three of them.

"I'll catch up with you again later. I hope you enjoyed the Circus," she told them. Then she quickly made her way toward the nearest set of stairs. Asher turned his attention to them.

"If you will follow me?" His tone was light, though there was more command than request in his voice. Jo wanted to rebel, but she contained the urge. Instead, she rose to her feet and followed after him as he made his way toward the stairs. The next act was taking the ring and the silence from the crowd let her know that no one was paying them any attention.

He led them out of the tent, out into the hectic, busy side show atmosphere and the overwhelming scents and sounds. As if by magic, people moved aside as he passed, granting them a cleared pathway to follow. Jo took the opportunity to study his ass as he walked and moved, enjoying the way it flexed and shifted with each of his steps. It was a really yummy ass.

As if sensing her eyes upon him, he stopped before a door and turned to look at the three of them over his shoulder. There was a faint smile on his face, though she could only see half of it. The large man guarding the door without really guarding it nearly snapped to attention, then reached out and opened the door for him. Asher motioned them through the opened portal with one hand, waiting until after Jason had stepped over the threshold before he joined them. The door swung closed and left them in a small enclosure with a bare bulb overhead. Jo recognized it as the small room they'd entered last night when they'd arrived.

Jason was the one who tugged the second door open, revealing the stone steps that would take them down into the vampires' lair. Their home. She was surprised when Asher offered her his arm, a gesture that was filled with old world grace and manners. She felt Gin and Jason both staring at her, as if this was some kind of test and they were grading her based on how she reacted. The urge to touch him rose up in her again and, with cautiously slow moves, she held her arm out. This was something new to her and she wasn't sure what she was supposed to do. Asher's smile grew fractionally, then he slipped his arm beneath hers and made sure her hand was resting on his before he motioned toward the stairs. "This way, cherie."

They started down the stairs together, both of them silent. She could feel Jason and Gin behind her, the frenzied state of his energy filling the area around them. Under it, and only slightly less frenzied, was Gin's energy. It had already started changing, yet another reminder that things would never be the way they once had been. That reminder was enough to make her want to cry and if not for Asher's presence, she might have stopped where she was and run back in the other direction.

The vampire at her side had a calming effect on her. While she could feel the cool touch of his energy on her skin and against her shields, whatever emotions he felt were bottled away. She was kind of glad about that. Her ability to keep people's emotions out wasn't functioning properly after the concussion. She didn't know if it was the head injury itself or if it had to do with being overly tired. It felt as if she hadn't been getting enough sleep even though she'd spent most of the day before doing nothing but dozing and resting. Maybe they'd leave her alone long enough to do just that later.

When they reached the bottom of the stairs, Asher broke from her to open the door that would let them into the lair proper. He offered her a smile and a flourish that let her know she should go in first. Jo couldn't help the slight smile that tipped the corners of her lips up as she walked past him into the cavernous room. She knew that he was only being nice to her because Jean Claude had told him to, that he really didn't want to spend his time with her. But he let none of that show in his voice or actions or in the look upon his face. She couldn't help but smile at him for it.

It seemed only a moment after she'd stepped through the door that Asher was once again at her side. Jean Claude had a set of balls on him for using his friend the way he was. Oh, she knew. She just knew that the master vampire had made plans that involved exploiting the weakness of a friend. It was kind of a dickish thing of him to do. She was tempted to tell him that to his face, but to do so would let him know that his plan had already worked. And instinct told her that pulling away from Asher would only serve to further scar him. Bitchy as she was, she wasn't about to do that to him. It wasn't his fault that the man he served was a manipulative son of a bitch.

Jo decided it was best to keep her thoughts to herself. Best to play the role she'd already cast for herself. Nothing could be gained by calling Jean Claude on his machinations. And it would blow her cover. Hadn't she set herself up as the oblivious one? No. She'd leave it alone. She wouldn't mention to Jean Claude that she could see right through him. Better she let him think she was a surly little brat who couldn't stand him than a frightened young woman who was trying so hard to fight her way past the fear. She didn't think that she could ever trust any of them ever again. Other than Remy, every vampire and every lycanthrope could die choking on their own intestines.

There was silence between them as Asher escorted them back into the hallway that would take them to the bedroom they'd slept in last night. She wasn't sure she liked that. She had a feeling that she wasn't going to like whatever it was that was going to happen as soon as they came face to face with their new master. Maybe she should have run when she'd had the chance.

She felt them before they went through the door. There were three distinct different energies emanating from the room beyond. There was the almost violent swirl of human emotions that said Anita Blake was in there, her temper already strained beyond safe levels. There was a calm pool that she knew belonged to the master of the city, almost like a cold spot that crept over her skin. It felt both good and bad all at the same time. She shouldn't have liked that feeling, but she did. Pushing it away, she turned her attention to the last mass of energy behind the door. It was that same dead cold that she'd felt off every other vampire she'd ever met, but it was tempered with a sweet warmth that shouldn't have lived in the undead. Remy was in there.

Waiting for them.

Jason was the one who opened the door for them, allowing Gin to enter before him. Jo flicked her glance toward Asher and found that he wasn't happy, the way he held his jaw suggesting he wanted nothing to do with whatever was going to happen in this room. Jason stood staring at them, obviously not leaving his position until everyone had entered. She shifted toward him, made it appear as if she was feeling uneasy, and brushed her hand against his. It brought his gaze back to her face. For a few seconds, they simply stared at one another, though Jo made sure to keep her eyes on the tip of his nose. Then she offered him a tilt of her lips. The two of them went through the door together.

Jean Claude didn't start speaking until the door was closed behind them. Not that it mattered. There were so few people who lived in his lair that couldn't hear a bee fart at one hundred paces. The privacy offered by the door being shut was little more than a show, meant to make them feel more at ease. Meant to make her feel more at ease. She wanted to go to Remy, but she'd just smiled at Asher and she couldn't imagine what he'd think if she walked away from him. Granted he was doing what he'd been told, but that didn't mean that it wouldn't hurt him if she did. She looked at Remy and willed him to understand. His smile gave her courage.

"So what the fuck are we doing here?" she asked, deciding that being on the defensive would fit with the role she'd appointed herself to play. To emphasize the bitchiness, she crossed her arms over her chest and frowned at the whole room.

"Such language from one so young. Such cynicism. How sad," Jean Claude answered, allowing a hint of faux shock to color his voice. "Young ladies should not speak in such a manner."

"No one has ever accused me of being a lady. Get on with it. I don't have limitless patience."

"Jo. Try to be gracious." Gin sounded frustrated.

"You know me. This is gracious." Her friend frowned with the announcement, but said nothing else. Jo gave her full attention to the dark headed vampire.

"Very well," he replied, a sigh sliding through his voice. Jo fought against the shudder that worked up her spine that his words brought to life. How he made her do that with just his voice was beyond her. "Since you wish to get on with it, I will come right to the point." He paused to allow his tone to sink in. His eyes never left her face. She didn't have to look to know. She could feel them on her. "After much consideration, I have determined that it would be in everyone's best interests if I separate the three of you."

"What?" Jo forgot herself and glanced up. The deep blue of his eyes caught her and she felt herself falling into them. The next thing she knew, she was being held in Remy's arms, her body pressed tightly against his chest. She gasped, her lungs burning for air as if she'd been under water for far too long.

"You can't split us up," Gin began, her tone suggesting that she hoped she would be able to talk sense to him. Hoped that he would listen to her and not hear the plea hidden in the depths of her words. "She needs us. We need him. I need them. We all need each other. If you split us up..."

"It is far too dangerous to leave the three of you together." Both Jo and Gin opened their mouths to argue but the vampire held up one long, elegant hand to halt their speech. "Your young master knows almost nothing of being a vampire. Belladonna did him no favors by leaving him without instruction. He is in need of training. And the little cat is afraid of what she is to become. She must be with other lycanthropes the first few times she changes. They will teach her control so that she does not harm anyone. She does not wish to act the way Belladonna's leopards do."

Jo looked at Gin, who'd ended up standing beside Remy. She was caught up in memories of those leopards and the horrible things they'd done. To the people they'd played with and eventually eaten as well as to Gin herself. Jo wasn't so stupid to think that she'd received the same treatment at the hands of the weres as her friend had. And the horror she saw in Gin's eyes said far more than any words ever could. Remy wrapped an arm around Gin's shoulders and tugged her even closer.

"That leaves you, Jocelyn. The wounded warrior who is so blinded by hate that you would damn those who wish to help you." She looked at him out of the corner of her eye to see that he was watching her, that there was something lurking in the depths of his deep blue gaze. She thought that maybe she was imagining things because it looked to her as if there was pity there. And understanding. "I see the desire for revenge burning in your eyes. I also see that you would do us harm if we were to let our guards down. I cannot risk that any of my people fall victim to your distrust."

She let her gaze shift around the room, carefully taking in each and every person there. She was surprised that Anita had kept quiet so far, though the look on the woman's face suggested she was almost to the end of her rope. And there was nothing on the air other than her own feelings of inadequacy to tell her what everyone else was thinking or feeling. She pulled from Remy's hold and stalked across the room to the dresser. "Fine. I'll just pack my shit and get out of everyone's hair. Thanks for a whole fuckload of nothing."

"I do not think you understand, Jocelyn. You are not the one leaving. Remy and Ginette are." Jean Claude's words stopped her cold. She turned to glare at him. "We are here so that you may say good bye to them before they must depart."

"Dere no reason to do dis." Remy's voice slid around the room, filled with his own brand of persuasive charm. "She be good if you ask. She even make promises. Right, cher?"

"Don't tell him lies, Remy. You know I won't promise that."

"She is quite correct, Remy. She will not promise to something that she cannot guarantee. I have seen that blood thirsty look before. There is nothing that can chase it away," Jean Claude said, voice dropping painfully into the sudden silence of the room. "She abhors the touch of any vampire but you. She cannot stand to be near any of the lycanthropes. She smells of anger and fear. It is a potent combination. And while I can tell you that my people are stronger than their baser urges, it takes but one accident. I will not put my people at risk anymore than I will put the three of you at risk. This is how it must be."

"Are you going to lock me in here so that I can't put a stake into anyone's heart?" Jo asked, voice empty of emotion.

"I will not lock you away as if you are an animal. But I cannot allow you to wander my home alone. You will have someone with you at all times. A schedule has been put in place for the daytime hours. The nighttime hours belong to Asher. Until you can see past your fear and hatred, you will not have a moment to yourself." Jean Claude motioned with one hand toward both Remy and Gin. "Until she can control her beast, she will not be allowed near you. Your emotions could trigger her to change. And until your young master completes his training, he will not be allowed to be near you."

"Fuck you."

Her words didn't faze him. "I am afraid I am unavailable. Ma petite can be quite possessive. But I am sure there is someone here who would be willing."

"I am not staying here without them."

"I am your master. You will do as I tell you."

"Or what?" Jo demanded. "You'll punish me? Nothing you can do will be worse than what's already been done to me. And nothing could be worse than taking away my family. And by the way. If you think you can buy my loyalty, you can go fuck yourself. I can't be bought. I have no intention of wearing any piece of clothing that comes from you. Maybe you can snow the rest of the mortals, but I've seen what you and your kind are. I'm not impressed."

"Jo," Remy's voice slid over her. Not quite as intoxicating as Jean Claude's, but it was damned close. He was going to try and coax her into behaving like he'd done back in New Orleans. "Petit. Dere no reason to be ugly `bout all dis."

"Don't, Remy. Just don't. The only reason I survived everything that bitch and her psycho groupies did to me is because I had you. And Gin. He's taking that away. It isn't okay. It isn't fair. None of this is fair. I didn't ask for any of this. I'm not going to be alright. And I'm not going to be his little... whore. I'm sorry. I love you both. But I can't do this."

She knew she should probably stop it all and put a look of contrition on her face, throw herself at his feet and beg him to forgive her stupidity. Beg him not to take them away from her. But she couldn't. How was she supposed to survive in this place without them? How could he ask her to try? Why couldn't she be happy that they were all alive and away from Belladonna? That was what they'd wanted. And they'd gotten it. Surely she could survive as long as she knew they were okay. This wasn't really that big a deal. Was it?

Jo cast her glaze around the room and took in the look on every face there. Anita was frowning, arms crossed over her chest in a position that was filled with anger and aggression. Jo wasn't sure why the woman hadn't said anything but it was probably a good thing. If Anita had spoken, Jo would have probably gotten her ass shot. Jason had done his best to blend into the background and remained forgotten. And he looked at her as if he understood every last thing she was feeling. Neither Jean Claude or Asher wore any kind of noticeable expression but a gentle touch told her both men were waiting to see what would happen next. Last was Remy and Gin. Both of them stared at her with pleading eyes, every last ounce of emotion they felt plain to see in their eyes and upon their faces.

Fuckity fuck fuck fuck.

Sighing, she wrapped her arms around herself and tried to remember what it had been like before. "Alright. I'll try. But for them. Not for anyone else."

It felt as if the room breathed a sigh of relief. The tension disappeared so suddenly, Jo almost staggered. She soon found herself held tight in Remy's arms. When she looked up at him, he took his mouth with hers. The kiss was short and bittersweet. "Dis don' last forever, petit. You see me again. Soon. You see us bot' again soon. Dat a promise. No one gon' keep us apart for long." He shot a glance toward the others to let her know who he meant. She simply nodded and hugged him tighter. His mouth found hers again. This time, he kissed her until she couldn't breathe and the only thing she could think of was throwing him down on the floor and fucking his brains out. When he finally pulled back, she had to cling to him just to stay upright. "Promise me you gon' be good, cher."

"I promise."

~*~*~*~*~

She'd eventually made her escape, claiming that she needed time to get her head on straight. Jean Claude had simply smiled and nodded, watching as she'd finally pulled away from Gin and Remy so that she could slip out of the room. Of course her tail had followed after her. Asher had kept his distance until she'd reached the door that opened out onto the stairs. Then he'd been by her side before she'd been able to even give the thing a tug. When asked, she'd told him that she needed to get away from the Circus and everyone in it. When he'd asked where, she'd said someplace where normal people went. They'd climbed into the limo after Asher had given the driver instructions and they'd been off.

She was starting to think that Asher regretted whatever he'd told the driver. They were presently strolling around a mall, Jo idly watching people as they passed and only occasionally glancing into the shops. The vampire at her side looked distinctly uncomfortable. She was tempted to tell him they could leave, but she was finally starting to relax. It felt as if she'd been on edge for so long that she couldn't remember what it was like not to be tense.

She stopped before Victoria's Secret and eyed the merchandise, one hand fingering the wad of cash she'd found in her pocket when she'd been climbing the stairs. She was sure Remy had shoved it in there, but she had no clue where he could have gotten it. It felt as if it was burning a hole in her pocket and she had to fight the urge to step inside and buy frivolous things.

Asher stood beside her, casually taking in the mannequins and the merchandise they were wearing. One hand lifted, a finger flicking toward a babydoll in black chiffon and lace. "Your young master would no doubt appreciate such a garment."

"Why do you call him that?" she asked absently, mentally agreeing with Asher. The man obviously had taste.

"Because he is a master and he is young." Jo glanced up at Asher and found him still staring at the display. There was tension in the way he held his jaw. Before she could think about it and stop herself, she reached out and laid a hand on his arm. The action drew his gaze her way. If he could pretend to like her, she could at least pretend the same in return. It wasn't his fault that she was damaged.

"Which one do you like?" Her question seemed to startle him but he turned back to the window to give it one more look. After a short time, the corner of his mouth curled up in a knowing smile.

"What I like is not sold in this store." There was a hint of heat in his voice, as if he was recalling something particularly memorable.

"I see. Studs and whips are more your speed." The comment earned her another look. This time, there was something real in the one eye she could see. Something that twisted a hot knife of need deep in her belly.

"Leather is much more durable than lace."

"Its a damn shame I left my leather bra and thong back in New Orleans." She didn't know what made her say it, but his attitude changed after that. As she strolled away from the window, he trailed after her. She could sense a small finger of appreciation in his gaze as it caressed the line of her back. No doubt he was trying to imagine what she looked like in that bra and panties set. Maybe she'd show him. Maybe.

The appreciation lasted right up until she stepped into Hot Topic. Almost instantly, she felt his arrogance wrap around him like a shield. That was his armor, the way he protected himself from the outside world and its cruelties. Kind of like her and her smart mouth. And her favored style of dress. It was time to put on her own armor.

After carefully counting just how much money Remy had pressed upon her, Jo began floating around the store. Asher followed, his disapproval mounting with each item she picked up and laid over her arm. A micro mini kilt. A baby doll top with a picture of a faerie on the chest. A pair of fishnet thigh highs. Stockings with bows. Stripes knee socks. Black leggings. A fishnet shirt. The pile grew higher and higher. Asher's frown got deeper and deeper.

By the time she'd finally picked every last bit of clothing she could that she knew she'd wear, he was scowling so intently that she thought it had to hurt. But he followed her to the counter to pay, silent as the grave. She added a bottle of cologne with a smell that reminded her of musky coffins. As the cashier was ringing every thing up, Asher motioned toward her stash. "There is no need to purchase all of this. I know that Jean Claude has given orders for a wardrobe to be made for you."

"I promised I would try to behave myself. I didn't say that I was going to conform to anyone's standards but my own. This is how I like to dress."

Asher frowned at her, furrows appearing in his forehead as he considered that. "But why? You are a beautiful young woman. Why clothe yourself in such an unappealing manner?"

She pondered his question seriously, gave consideration to lying to him and telling him that this was the way she dressed because this was who she was. But he'd know. And he maybe deserved the truth. So far, he seemed to be the only one who didn't want something from her. "You wear arrogance and anger as your armor. I wear things like this. When I put this on, people will look at me and think that I'd prefer to take a switchblade to them over actually talking. It protects me."

"From what?" It sounded as if he genuinely wanted to know. Jo shrugged one shoulder and handed over some bills when the cashier gave her the total.

"From people." She took the change and her bag before moving away from the register so that the people behind her could pay for their purchases. She was already mentally going over what she'd need to complete her look. She needed a shoe store. And she was on her way to find one when Asher's hand caught her arm and stopped her.

"Why? What have they done to you?"

Before considering what she was doing, Jo reached out and carefully slid her fingers under the thick curtain of his hair. He flinched but didn't pull away when she ran them over the waxy ridges of the scars his golden locks hid from the world. "Not all of us wear our scars on the outside, Asher."

His eyes were bright and clear, like looking into an arctic pool. Too late she realized that she wasn't supposed to look at him. She tried to pull away, tried to break contact, even as her body swayed ever so slightly toward his. "Tell me, cherie. Tell me what they did to you."

She told him. She told him about her perfect brother, how she'd always lived in his shadow. How she'd never quite lived up to her parents expectations. How their silent disapproval had hurt far more than any blow they could have struck with their hands. She told him about Todd and how he'd used her for sex and as a punching bag. How he'd threatened and humiliated her when she hadn't done what he'd wanted. How he'd belittled her and made her feel cheap after she'd realized that she should never have hooked up with him. She told him of her life with Belladonna and her kiss, and how they'd seen her and Gin as little more than tools. How they'd treated her. How they'd terrorized her and threatened her friends with death or worse. How she'd been so afraid of them that she hadn't been able to think straight until the anger had risen up to take control.

She told him it all and, when she was done, she found herself held against his chest. She was shaking and cold, though one had nothing to do with the other. Tears clogged her eyes, threatened to spill over. She ignored the sense of curiosity that hung around them, ignored the fact that people were no doubt watching them. She just let him hold her and hoped like hell that the fear would eventually die. She hated being like this. Hated it so intently that it made her hate herself. Made her so mad she couldn't see straight.

When she finally had it in her to pull away from the strange sense of safety she felt from having his arms around her, it was to find that a pair of boys were standing there. Staring at them. Both had the obligatory flat black hair that ran rampant through the Goth or emo or whatever the hell they calling themselves now community. Dark eye makeup against the uneven white of their foundation gave them a raccoon kind of look. Both boys had on blood red lipstick and had clothed themselves in the obligatory black that seemed to be the uniform of their kind. Neither one quite gave off the tortured soul feel that they had obviously been shooting for.

"Got a problem, dicks?" Jo asked, embarrassed for her loss of composure.

Their gazes slid away from her to eye Asher behind her. By the looks on their painted up dead clown faces, she could tell that they were trying to decide if he was a vampire. She would probably get a tongue lashing for what she was about to do, but she couldn't help herself. Inching a little closer to Asher, she laid her head against his chest and wrapped her arms around him. "Back off, boys. He's mine. I don't share. And yes. He's a vampire."

She felt Asher stiffen in her hold. She couldn't imagine what the hell had come over her but, much to her relief, he said nothing to her about her show. Instead, he put a hand on her shoulder and gently nudged her toward the door. "Shall we go, cherie? I believe you wished to buy something special to wear later."

"Of course, tiger. Let's get going." She turned and allowed him to escort her to the door. She heard the boys following after them. And she heard what they both had to say.

"There's no way that he's a vampire. Vampires don't look like that. He doesn't even look dead," one was saying to the other.

"Dude, you're so lame. He was totally a vamp. Didn't you see the way he's got her enthralled? I bet he fed on her before they came to the mall." The second one said with a sigh. "You're such a dick."

"Dude! Are you high? He's totally not a vampire. Vampires don't go to the mall," the first one snorted in disgust. "We've got a better chance of having masses of brain eating zombies invade the mall than we have of seeing a real vampire here."

"You've been watching too many movies. You need to get laid." Jo rolled her eyes. Oh, right. Like that was going to happen. Their conversation faded as they took a turn and went in another direction. Jo couldn't stop herself from chuckling.

"Have you gotten everything you need? May we leave now?" Asher asked. It sounded to her as if he'd reached the end of his rope. She considered her purchases and the money left, then turned and gave him an apologetic look.

"Two more stops. I think I want to go back to Victoria's Secret. I need something to wear under the fishnet shirt."

"It will no longer be a secret if you do that," he commented. Some of the unhappiness slid out of his voice. She smiled at him.

"That's the idea. I'm thinking jewel tones. What do you think?" She watched him as he let his gaze slide over her. Jo tossed him a grin. "Want to help me pick something out?"

He only smiled. "And the second stop?"

"A shoe place. I need some Docs. I think I want twenty eye Docs."

"Twenty eye Docs. What are those?"

"Combat styled boots that reach the knees," she told him as she stopped before a map of the mall. A quick scan showed her where the two shops in question were in relation to where they were. She loved the little "You are here" arrows that they put on the map.

"I do not think Jean Claude will be very pleased by this."

Jo tossed a smile at him over her shoulder. "That, gorgeous, is the idea."