Original Fic: I Ain't Afraid of Emily May (6/8)
Title: I Ain't Afraid of Emily May
Author: ladychi, or KJ Stueve if you're here via Facebook
Rating: Mature, for violence and language
Summary: Ten years ago, Nate Hannigan's cousin Callie was brutally murdered by a force he didn't understand. Now the ghost of the vengeful Emily May has been summoned again, and Nate will sacrifice anything and everything to keep her from killing another member of his family.
Previous Chapters: One: Return to Bent Fork | Two: The Ghost in the Wall | Three: The Silver Dollar Dilemma | Four: In Through the Window | Five: Things Which Kept The Door Shut
Six: The Pentagram in the Attic
Beth followed me down the stairs, apparently the first time she had left her room since Annie had discovered that she had the silver dollar. Annie greeted us at the foot of the stairs, her eyebrows furrowed in concern.
“Well?”
“Well, it’s the same one,” I said evenly.
“What do we do about that?” Annie asked, dusting her hands on her jeans.
“We don’t do anything. I’ll take care of it.”
“You’ll take care of it? That’s it, it’s over?”
“Of course not.”
“Nate!”
“What? What do you want from me, Annie? I’m going to do my best - and if I can’t take care of it, then here’s what you do: You get the hell out.”
“Excuse me?”
“Pack up all your stuff and get the hell out.”
“Nate,” Annie hissed, “we can’t just pack up and move.”
“Stay here then,” I said. “It won’t matter to me, because if I fail, I’m pretty much dead anyway.”
“Jesus, Nate.”
“What? I’m not going to sugar-coat it, Annie. It is what it is.”
“I’m going with you,” Beth announced.
Annie and I both turned to look at her. “No, you’re not,” Annie said.
“Yes, I am. I still don’t understand what’s going on, but I guess I started this whole mess, so I should see it through to the end.”
“No, you didn’t.” Annie and Beth raised their eyebrows at me, a perfect mirror of each others’ expressions. I sighed - some part of me would always be a frustrated history teacher. I never could resist providing an explanation, when I could. “This coin is an anchor - it keeps the spirit of Emily May firmly rooted in this spot - but just like destroying the anchor of ship doesn’t erase its existence, destroying the coin won’t destroy Emily May.”
“So why do you want to get rid of it?” Beth’s brow was furrowed in confusion. “If destroying the coin doesn’t get rid of Emily May, then why bother with it?”
“Because if she hasn’t got a base, then she’s also got nothing grounding her to this Earth - and I can create a separate talisman to keep her out. Theoretically.”
“You know, Nate, you aren’t inspiring a lot of confidence here,” Annie snapped at me.
“That would be because I don’t want to paint some sort of rosy-ass picture for you, all right? A lot of the time I’m not sure what I’m going to try will work out. No one’s written this stuff down, because it would be useless, because every situation is different.”
“Nate… I didn’t mean…”
“Don’t worry about what you meant and what you didn’t mean. I’m going to do my best, Annie, and I’m going to do it alone, because it’s just safer that way. I’ve gotten away from her before, I can probably do it again - but only if I don’t have to worry about another member of my family getting eviscerated in front of my eyes.”
Annie went white, and I knew I’d said too much. “It’s not going to happen. I promise.”
“Just… don’t be too noble, all right? Save yourself, Nate. If we have to, we’ll call a retreat,” Annie said.
“Sure, yeah.” I gave her my best ‘I won’t be a hero’ grin. “It’s a deal.”
**
The shrinks said for a long time that I was assuming too much responsibility for the actions of another autonomous human being, and that I should try to forgive myself for what happened to Callie. But then, none of the shrinks were there, were they? That’s always the kicker with me - no one else was in the attic with me. No one else saw what I saw. So no one else can know what I’m responsible for, and what I’m not.
Most people think fire when they think about hell. Not me. I think about a sweltering attic at the ass-end of summer. I think about that cold, supernatural chill that swept over us both. And I think about the silver dollar, spinning in the air right in front of my eyes for all eternity, knowing what was about to happen but having no power in the world to stop it.
**
“Okay, so I think I’ve got this figured out,” Callie said as I came up the stairs. “What we want to do is to reassure Emily May that we’re not scared of her presence, so that she’ll feel comfortable enough to reveal herself to us.”
“This is a supremely bad idea.”
Callie flashed me a smile. “Admit it, jerk. You’re a little excited, aren’t you?”
I couldn’t deny that. Ever since childhood, I had to be tempted into braving disobedience, but I had never once not enjoyed it, once I had made my decision.
I ducked my head. “I might, under other, not ridiculous circumstances, be a little excited.”
“Come on, Nate, how many people do you know that can claim they’ve seen a real live ghost?”
I thought back to taking Beauregard around the house and the terrifying apparition I had made myself dismiss and swallowed the bile rising up my throat. “I guess not many.”
“Precisely,” Callie said with a grin. “All right, this is what we do.”
She arranged us precisely around what I would now recognize as a crudely drawn pentagram, and lit a candle between our legs.
“Is the fire really necessary?” I asked, my voice a little nervous.
“No,” Callie said, “but you know I have a flair for the dramatic.”
I rolled my eyes. “Jesus. Let’s just get this over with.”
“A little timing, Nathaniel,” Callie scolded me, “a little patience. That’s what you need.”
“Uh huh, sure.”
“So we hold hands now.” Callie reached out across the pentagram and took my hands in hers, yanking them towards the center.
“Gentle, Callie! Jeez. I have to use these again, you know.”
“Don’t be such a pussy, Nate. Okay, so.” She drew in a deep breath and locked eyes with me. “Breathe with me.”
“Are we doing yoga or having a séance?”
“Breathe. With. Me. Or I swear to God, I’ll kick you in the nuts.”
“Wow, okay. There’s no need to get touchy about it.” I closed my eyes and listened to the steady in and out of Callie’s breathing and did my best to force my body to comply with hers.
“Now that our thoughts and our bodies are aligned, we summon Emily May by flipping the coin.”
I opened one eye to look at her. “I suppose you think I should do it.”
“As a matter of fact I do think you should, but knowing what a yellow-livered coward you are…”
“…what is this, 1916?”
“…I’m going to do that part myself.”
She tossed the coin in the air. It turned over and over and over again. In my memory it never stops spinning - because what happened next is still a blur. But I’ll never forget what started the chain of events that changed my life and sealed my fate.
Callie’s voice was calm. “I ain’t afraid of Emily May.”
Author: ladychi, or KJ Stueve if you're here via Facebook
Rating: Mature, for violence and language
Summary: Ten years ago, Nate Hannigan's cousin Callie was brutally murdered by a force he didn't understand. Now the ghost of the vengeful Emily May has been summoned again, and Nate will sacrifice anything and everything to keep her from killing another member of his family.
Previous Chapters: One: Return to Bent Fork | Two: The Ghost in the Wall | Three: The Silver Dollar Dilemma | Four: In Through the Window | Five: Things Which Kept The Door Shut
Six: The Pentagram in the Attic
Beth followed me down the stairs, apparently the first time she had left her room since Annie had discovered that she had the silver dollar. Annie greeted us at the foot of the stairs, her eyebrows furrowed in concern.
“Well?”
“Well, it’s the same one,” I said evenly.
“What do we do about that?” Annie asked, dusting her hands on her jeans.
“We don’t do anything. I’ll take care of it.”
“You’ll take care of it? That’s it, it’s over?”
“Of course not.”
“Nate!”
“What? What do you want from me, Annie? I’m going to do my best - and if I can’t take care of it, then here’s what you do: You get the hell out.”
“Excuse me?”
“Pack up all your stuff and get the hell out.”
“Nate,” Annie hissed, “we can’t just pack up and move.”
“Stay here then,” I said. “It won’t matter to me, because if I fail, I’m pretty much dead anyway.”
“Jesus, Nate.”
“What? I’m not going to sugar-coat it, Annie. It is what it is.”
“I’m going with you,” Beth announced.
Annie and I both turned to look at her. “No, you’re not,” Annie said.
“Yes, I am. I still don’t understand what’s going on, but I guess I started this whole mess, so I should see it through to the end.”
“No, you didn’t.” Annie and Beth raised their eyebrows at me, a perfect mirror of each others’ expressions. I sighed - some part of me would always be a frustrated history teacher. I never could resist providing an explanation, when I could. “This coin is an anchor - it keeps the spirit of Emily May firmly rooted in this spot - but just like destroying the anchor of ship doesn’t erase its existence, destroying the coin won’t destroy Emily May.”
“So why do you want to get rid of it?” Beth’s brow was furrowed in confusion. “If destroying the coin doesn’t get rid of Emily May, then why bother with it?”
“Because if she hasn’t got a base, then she’s also got nothing grounding her to this Earth - and I can create a separate talisman to keep her out. Theoretically.”
“You know, Nate, you aren’t inspiring a lot of confidence here,” Annie snapped at me.
“That would be because I don’t want to paint some sort of rosy-ass picture for you, all right? A lot of the time I’m not sure what I’m going to try will work out. No one’s written this stuff down, because it would be useless, because every situation is different.”
“Nate… I didn’t mean…”
“Don’t worry about what you meant and what you didn’t mean. I’m going to do my best, Annie, and I’m going to do it alone, because it’s just safer that way. I’ve gotten away from her before, I can probably do it again - but only if I don’t have to worry about another member of my family getting eviscerated in front of my eyes.”
Annie went white, and I knew I’d said too much. “It’s not going to happen. I promise.”
“Just… don’t be too noble, all right? Save yourself, Nate. If we have to, we’ll call a retreat,” Annie said.
“Sure, yeah.” I gave her my best ‘I won’t be a hero’ grin. “It’s a deal.”
**
The shrinks said for a long time that I was assuming too much responsibility for the actions of another autonomous human being, and that I should try to forgive myself for what happened to Callie. But then, none of the shrinks were there, were they? That’s always the kicker with me - no one else was in the attic with me. No one else saw what I saw. So no one else can know what I’m responsible for, and what I’m not.
Most people think fire when they think about hell. Not me. I think about a sweltering attic at the ass-end of summer. I think about that cold, supernatural chill that swept over us both. And I think about the silver dollar, spinning in the air right in front of my eyes for all eternity, knowing what was about to happen but having no power in the world to stop it.
**
“Okay, so I think I’ve got this figured out,” Callie said as I came up the stairs. “What we want to do is to reassure Emily May that we’re not scared of her presence, so that she’ll feel comfortable enough to reveal herself to us.”
“This is a supremely bad idea.”
Callie flashed me a smile. “Admit it, jerk. You’re a little excited, aren’t you?”
I couldn’t deny that. Ever since childhood, I had to be tempted into braving disobedience, but I had never once not enjoyed it, once I had made my decision.
I ducked my head. “I might, under other, not ridiculous circumstances, be a little excited.”
“Come on, Nate, how many people do you know that can claim they’ve seen a real live ghost?”
I thought back to taking Beauregard around the house and the terrifying apparition I had made myself dismiss and swallowed the bile rising up my throat. “I guess not many.”
“Precisely,” Callie said with a grin. “All right, this is what we do.”
She arranged us precisely around what I would now recognize as a crudely drawn pentagram, and lit a candle between our legs.
“Is the fire really necessary?” I asked, my voice a little nervous.
“No,” Callie said, “but you know I have a flair for the dramatic.”
I rolled my eyes. “Jesus. Let’s just get this over with.”
“A little timing, Nathaniel,” Callie scolded me, “a little patience. That’s what you need.”
“Uh huh, sure.”
“So we hold hands now.” Callie reached out across the pentagram and took my hands in hers, yanking them towards the center.
“Gentle, Callie! Jeez. I have to use these again, you know.”
“Don’t be such a pussy, Nate. Okay, so.” She drew in a deep breath and locked eyes with me. “Breathe with me.”
“Are we doing yoga or having a séance?”
“Breathe. With. Me. Or I swear to God, I’ll kick you in the nuts.”
“Wow, okay. There’s no need to get touchy about it.” I closed my eyes and listened to the steady in and out of Callie’s breathing and did my best to force my body to comply with hers.
“Now that our thoughts and our bodies are aligned, we summon Emily May by flipping the coin.”
I opened one eye to look at her. “I suppose you think I should do it.”
“As a matter of fact I do think you should, but knowing what a yellow-livered coward you are…”
“…what is this, 1916?”
“…I’m going to do that part myself.”
She tossed the coin in the air. It turned over and over and over again. In my memory it never stops spinning - because what happened next is still a blur. But I’ll never forget what started the chain of events that changed my life and sealed my fate.
Callie’s voice was calm. “I ain’t afraid of Emily May.”