...still can't sleep
Ug...i'm still up...i slept last night at
least. Last night...oh wait i guess i mean the night
before...never mind...either way i got a little sleep. That night
I went to bed early after staying up all night and that day...just to
make sure i would sleep..i even worked my ass off cleaning and doing
stuff around the apartment to make myself tired out..it worked and i
went to bed at ten, and slept a whole 17 hours. Last night
though...couldn't sleep again. It's so frustrating! I had
an ok day yesterday though, I bummed around and even started on my
distance learning classes early (cause my teachers added me early and
had stuff avaliable to work ok..it so awesome)...I felt somewhat
accomplish...I also made chris dinner and brought it up to him at
work. I think he was happy I did :-) so i was happy
too. Today I'm supposed to go to astroworld and have fun, I'm
gonna try...just haven't slept so i know i'm gonna be tired
again. I get to go to MY home tonight too, which is extra
nice...I miss my mom and my cat a bit and i will enjoy getting to see
them, even though it's for a breif time. I maybe going home again
on sunday night...don't know yet though...be quite honest I do kinda
want to spend a bit more time with chris before our school officailly
start again...it just depends if i can intice chris to bring me home on
tuesday night...it also depends on if he works too. Bah! Oh well
can't have everything in life...geeze...like sleep. I looked at
myself this morning in the mirror...I look extremely tired too...bags
under my eyes and everything. I think i'm gonna have to buy some
sleeping pills or something...this can't keep going on! If
it does i'm gonna go more insane then i am already...and i don't think
it will be the good kind either. I know i've had my really mean
moments because i'm sleep deprived...I know chris has notice...course
he probably thinks it is my normal mood swings...but it really
isn't. I feel bad about it...he's so sweet to me, rarely ever
gets mad at me...I'm such a bad person! *whimpers*
He asked me to go with him to Dallas on the weekend of my bday and I
told him no...I donno why even..I just felt like being difficult.
I think I may change my answer...I know he wanted me to go very
badly...and i want to make him happy again. Sleeping pills...that
will put me in better moods i think. If fact I need to THINK
before I answer things so meanly...I am so mean to the people i
love. It's seems that if someone is really close to me, my mind
thinks it's ok to show the true meaness within...no good...no
good...gotta change. Man my post are no fun, no wonder people
rarely comment to them. I'll
try to be more fun...or funny...or retarded...or something other than
just listing my day's events and telling everyone how bad i feel or
whatever...you know i should sit in a parked car and point hairdryers
at random cars and see if they slow down...wouldn't that be fun??
Or maybe begin to have an unnatural fear of staplers! bahahaha! yes
that is what i will do! Or even
better...I will pretend to be a little white laboritory mouse who
want's only goal in life is to take over the world...now who want's to
be pinky...wait i'll be picky...i think more like him....I need someone
to be brain...so when i succeed in taking over the world i can give it
to them as a present...and then they can ruin it and i'll do it all
over again! yes that is what we shall do....
we're pinky and the brain, yes pinky and the brain, one is a genius, the others insane, their labrotory mice, whose genes have been spliced, their pinky, pinky and the brain brain brain brain brain brain brain brain brain....their pinky and the brain, yes pinky and the brain, their twilight campagn is easy to explain, to prove their mousey worth they'll over throw the earth, their pinky, pinky and the brain brain brain brain brain brain brain brain narf! Point....so brain what are we going to do tonight(maybe this is why i can't sleep huh? I'm too busy taking over the world! LOL)....
and this is why i need a brain (in both senses) one to say the next line (same thing we do every night pinky...try to take over the world!) and in the other sense so i don't (as meg would say) word vomit all these things. ::sigh:: i'm tired now, but can't sleep..and shouldn't! grr.....any ideas anyone? come on now...i've done my part by being entertaining....oh yeah...i might get to dye my hair tonight...any suggestions yet? You have until tonight! I'll check my email and live journal and xange and all right before i go out to buy the dye ok? please! input!!! Ok love you, bye bye
we're pinky and the brain, yes pinky and the brain, one is a genius, the others insane, their labrotory mice, whose genes have been spliced, their pinky, pinky and the brain brain brain brain brain brain brain brain brain....their pinky and the brain, yes pinky and the brain, their twilight campagn is easy to explain, to prove their mousey worth they'll over throw the earth, their pinky, pinky and the brain brain brain brain brain brain brain brain narf! Point....so brain what are we going to do tonight(maybe this is why i can't sleep huh? I'm too busy taking over the world! LOL)....
and this is why i need a brain (in both senses) one to say the next line (same thing we do every night pinky...try to take over the world!) and in the other sense so i don't (as meg would say) word vomit all these things. ::sigh:: i'm tired now, but can't sleep..and shouldn't! grr.....any ideas anyone? come on now...i've done my part by being entertaining....oh yeah...i might get to dye my hair tonight...any suggestions yet? You have until tonight! I'll check my email and live journal and xange and all right before i go out to buy the dye ok? please! input!!! Ok love you, bye bye