Tomorrow is Katharine's funeral. Make me smile?
I'm not f-locking this because Katharine, I love you and I miss you. Everyone should know what a wonderful and special person you were and that I have been blessed to have you for a friend, even if it wasn't for long enough.
Katharine's obituary
THETFORD, VT - Katharine "Kati" Lynn Eaton, died Friday evening, Feb. 16, 2007, in a snowmobile accident. She was 20.
Kati was born March 10, 1986, the daughter of Sam and Julia (Chadwick) Eaton. She graduated from Thetford Academy and the River Bend Technical School in 2004. She was currently in her junior year at the University of Maine, Farmington, where she was pursuing a degree in early childhood education for a career in teaching.
Kati had a deep and devoted love for her family and her many friends, a passion for the outdoors, hunting, fishing and she found great joy in her work with children.
She is survived by her parents of North Thetford, two brothers, Bryon Perkins and Daniel Eaton, both of Thetford, her grandparents and numerous aunts, uncles and cousins.
Calling hours will be held Wednesday evening, Feb. 21 from 4 p.m. to 8 p.m. at the North Thetford Federated Church N. Route 5 in North Thetford. A service to honor her life will be celebrated the following day, Thursday, Feb 22 at 1 p.m. at the church. A fellowship reception will follow the church service.
In lieu of flowers, the family request gifts be made in Kati's memory to the Hattie Root Scholarship Fund, at Thetford Academy, P.O. Box 190, Academy Road, Thetford, VT 05074.
Arrangements are under the direction of the Boardway & Cilley Funeral Home on Main Street in Chelsea.
I'm trying VERY hard not to get petty and judgemental and to not get angry or mean, but Tina's decided not to come to the funeral and it's really bothering me, even though it shouldn't. I know everyone mourns in their own way, and I know Tina's never been very good with grief and especially not good at dealing with other people's grief, but...
I think it has to do with how she explained it to me, and that is just bothering me. And, as strange as it is to think it, I think that if she's not going to Katharine' funeral, she probably wouldn't come to mine, either. Which is morbid, yes, but still a thought I had.
And I'm just really on a roller coaster.
One second I'm laughing hysterically and bouncing across the kitchen, and the next I break down crying and I want to curl up into the couch and just... Well, the term "wallow" would be appropriate here.
I'd like a balance between crazy-happy-silly and uber-weepy-depressed, please.
Also, I'd like to ask my brother for the ten dollars he owes me without him snapping "what?!" when I say his name and therefore sending me into a tailspin of weeping and angry-bitter-wallowing. It's like... I hate that I have to ask him for it but I get paid Friday and I want to have cash for the lunch and possible dinner I know I will need it for tomorrow. But I hate the reason I need the money and so when he had an attitude when I called out to him, it made me clam up and go all passive-agressive and weepy.
And I'm so... angry. And sad. And I hate this whole grieving process and I *really* hope I get some closure tomorrow. It'll be good to be with my friends and to remember and celebrate Katharine. She would want us to make this a giant party.
And then I go god, KATHARINE. And it's so insane. It's like a physical hurt, and then it's got my anxiety rearing its head and ugh. I'm just a mess and I'd like to stop that, please.
So, I'm going to bed soon so I can get up and be at the Gray park-n-ride by 8am so we can drive the 3-4 hour trip to Vermont, but finding directions meant I printed off four sets from four websites and I am washing my hands of deciding whether the straight-across-three-states-via-mountains or down-Maine-back-up-New-Hampshire-via-highways route is better. Gabe is driving, he can choose.
ETA: Also, I feel like I could almost write and maybe I should channel all this crazy emotional upheaval into some constructive outlet but then I think I just can't and I can't figure out why. Like... I can't possibly believe the part of my brain that says I shouldn't write about what this feels like because it might trivialize it, because that's ridiculous. I mean, for goodness sake, I write about dead fathers and grieving children all the damn time, and if ANYONE is hyper-sensitive about that, it's me. But I think it comes down to being too close to the situation, still. I can't read fics about grieving right now, so not being able to write one should make sense, right?
Ugh. I'm a wallowing, emo mess. And yeah, I have an excuse, but I kind of hate it. Like everytime I flip out, Mom looks at me like THAT, and... just, can I be normal again? I know it takes time. But like I told her and said earlier, I waver between super-hyper-silly, wanting to giggle madly and crazy-sad-depressed, wanting to cry and sink into bed.
Unrelated, the girls are better than the boys on AI, and Randy and Simon must be having PMS.
Now, that all being said, I'm really just in need of some cheering up, and I expect that tomorrow this will especially be the case.
So! Help me out?
Leave me shiny happy bright things (or even not so shiny-happy-bright things) to come home to tomorrow night.
Also, if anyone knows where I can grab up some DC fics--particularly Dick Grayson and Roy Harper (OMG, ROY, how did you steal my heart so?)--point me? Or point me to people who know? ;) As my flist (as awesome as you are) is not so DC related, I won't ask you for Dick/Roy pr0n, even if I kind of want it. ;)
(And I have no idea when I'll be home, but if anything bad happens on Grey's Anatomy, it might BREAK ME. In a not good way.)
Link me, write me, comment-fic me. Show me something silly or happy, or even not-so-happy if it's in a fandom I like.
Go ahead and have a comment-war and break my LJ, even if I'm not here to participate. That'd be fun to come home to.
So, um, make me smile, please? At this point, in this mood, I am not above begging.
I ♥ my flist!
ETA: I was doing laundry and my mother nagged me about the dryer stopping and I groaned and she said "I know, I know, I'm the dryer nazi." I think she wins with that comment--it sent me into gigglefits until I cried.
Katharine's obituary
THETFORD, VT - Katharine "Kati" Lynn Eaton, died Friday evening, Feb. 16, 2007, in a snowmobile accident. She was 20.
Kati was born March 10, 1986, the daughter of Sam and Julia (Chadwick) Eaton. She graduated from Thetford Academy and the River Bend Technical School in 2004. She was currently in her junior year at the University of Maine, Farmington, where she was pursuing a degree in early childhood education for a career in teaching.
Kati had a deep and devoted love for her family and her many friends, a passion for the outdoors, hunting, fishing and she found great joy in her work with children.
She is survived by her parents of North Thetford, two brothers, Bryon Perkins and Daniel Eaton, both of Thetford, her grandparents and numerous aunts, uncles and cousins.
Calling hours will be held Wednesday evening, Feb. 21 from 4 p.m. to 8 p.m. at the North Thetford Federated Church N. Route 5 in North Thetford. A service to honor her life will be celebrated the following day, Thursday, Feb 22 at 1 p.m. at the church. A fellowship reception will follow the church service.
In lieu of flowers, the family request gifts be made in Kati's memory to the Hattie Root Scholarship Fund, at Thetford Academy, P.O. Box 190, Academy Road, Thetford, VT 05074.
Arrangements are under the direction of the Boardway & Cilley Funeral Home on Main Street in Chelsea.
I'm trying VERY hard not to get petty and judgemental and to not get angry or mean, but Tina's decided not to come to the funeral and it's really bothering me, even though it shouldn't. I know everyone mourns in their own way, and I know Tina's never been very good with grief and especially not good at dealing with other people's grief, but...
I think it has to do with how she explained it to me, and that is just bothering me. And, as strange as it is to think it, I think that if she's not going to Katharine' funeral, she probably wouldn't come to mine, either. Which is morbid, yes, but still a thought I had.
And I'm just really on a roller coaster.
One second I'm laughing hysterically and bouncing across the kitchen, and the next I break down crying and I want to curl up into the couch and just... Well, the term "wallow" would be appropriate here.
I'd like a balance between crazy-happy-silly and uber-weepy-depressed, please.
Also, I'd like to ask my brother for the ten dollars he owes me without him snapping "what?!" when I say his name and therefore sending me into a tailspin of weeping and angry-bitter-wallowing. It's like... I hate that I have to ask him for it but I get paid Friday and I want to have cash for the lunch and possible dinner I know I will need it for tomorrow. But I hate the reason I need the money and so when he had an attitude when I called out to him, it made me clam up and go all passive-agressive and weepy.
And I'm so... angry. And sad. And I hate this whole grieving process and I *really* hope I get some closure tomorrow. It'll be good to be with my friends and to remember and celebrate Katharine. She would want us to make this a giant party.
And then I go god, KATHARINE. And it's so insane. It's like a physical hurt, and then it's got my anxiety rearing its head and ugh. I'm just a mess and I'd like to stop that, please.
So, I'm going to bed soon so I can get up and be at the Gray park-n-ride by 8am so we can drive the 3-4 hour trip to Vermont, but finding directions meant I printed off four sets from four websites and I am washing my hands of deciding whether the straight-across-three-states-via-mountains or down-Maine-back-up-New-Hampshire-via-highways route is better. Gabe is driving, he can choose.
ETA: Also, I feel like I could almost write and maybe I should channel all this crazy emotional upheaval into some constructive outlet but then I think I just can't and I can't figure out why. Like... I can't possibly believe the part of my brain that says I shouldn't write about what this feels like because it might trivialize it, because that's ridiculous. I mean, for goodness sake, I write about dead fathers and grieving children all the damn time, and if ANYONE is hyper-sensitive about that, it's me. But I think it comes down to being too close to the situation, still. I can't read fics about grieving right now, so not being able to write one should make sense, right?
Ugh. I'm a wallowing, emo mess. And yeah, I have an excuse, but I kind of hate it. Like everytime I flip out, Mom looks at me like THAT, and... just, can I be normal again? I know it takes time. But like I told her and said earlier, I waver between super-hyper-silly, wanting to giggle madly and crazy-sad-depressed, wanting to cry and sink into bed.
Unrelated, the girls are better than the boys on AI, and Randy and Simon must be having PMS.
Now, that all being said, I'm really just in need of some cheering up, and I expect that tomorrow this will especially be the case.
So! Help me out?
Leave me shiny happy bright things (or even not so shiny-happy-bright things) to come home to tomorrow night.
Also, if anyone knows where I can grab up some DC fics--particularly Dick Grayson and Roy Harper (OMG, ROY, how did you steal my heart so?)--point me? Or point me to people who know? ;) As my flist (as awesome as you are) is not so DC related, I won't ask you for Dick/Roy pr0n, even if I kind of want it. ;)
(And I have no idea when I'll be home, but if anything bad happens on Grey's Anatomy, it might BREAK ME. In a not good way.)
Link me, write me, comment-fic me. Show me something silly or happy, or even not-so-happy if it's in a fandom I like.
Go ahead and have a comment-war and break my LJ, even if I'm not here to participate. That'd be fun to come home to.
So, um, make me smile, please? At this point, in this mood, I am not above begging.
I ♥ my flist!
ETA: I was doing laundry and my mother nagged me about the dryer stopping and I groaned and she said "I know, I know, I'm the dryer nazi." I think she wins with that comment--it sent me into gigglefits until I cried.