My Big Mouth

[lady_padma]

Next time I have the bright idea to tell anybody anything that might upset them, somebody please, stop me.

I can't help feeling that if I'd never said some of the things I've said the past couple of days, none of this would've happened.

Comments

[unsecretive]

Darling, don't be silly! You should feel free to come to your friends with any little trouble, whether it be relationship trouble, school trouble, deep trouble, or beauty trouble. And I'm feeling much better today. Most certainly aware that every single hair on my head is blond.

Was I really going on about the Weasley twins?

[pretty_vati]

Yes, you were. You were quite poetic.

Thankfully only Demelza and some random First Year boy heard you.

[unsecretive]

If only I could be quite as poetic when it came to writing essays. Irrelevant. The important thing is, you guys saved me from old age a complete emotional breakdown thinking that I am, Merlin forbid, ugly and for that I am forever grateful. Though I do wonder, have Demelza and Colin stopped snogging in random corners, then?

[pretty_vati]

Oh yes, they stopped snogging awhile back. It seems that Demelza was unable to fill in the dark hole in Colin's soul that threatened to swallow him whole or something.

You could never be ugly! I hesitate to ask this but, err, have you forgiven me for plucking that hair, then?

[unsecretive]

How unfortunate. I do hope he finds someone to fill that hole. I imagine having a gaping hole in your soul would be very painful. He seems to be rather fond of Harry, so perhaps we can persuade Harry to do some hole-filling.

Well, my scalp doesn't sting anymore. And it was just one hair. And you know I could never stay mad at you for long, Vati!

[lady_padma]

Are you suggesting that Harry date Splotchy?!

Ew, Lav, ew.

Harry could do better. That'd make Draco mad anyway.

[unsecretive]

Oh I know Harry could do better. But what about Splotchy? He needs someone and he's always nice to Harry. I just figured that Harry might have a beneficial effect on that hole!

[lady_padma]

But Harry? I don't know. Maybe. If this whole thing with Draco doesn't work out you could set them up. Even though Vati seems a little keen on Splotchy to be honest. I worry about her.

[unsecretive]

Well, I haven't heard a peep from Draco and Harry doesn't seem to be doing anything but being a moody git. Maybe if he and Splotchy have it on with each other, Splotchy can mend his hole and Harry can realize his true feelings for Draco. Everybody wins!

[lady_padma]

You're so smart! I say we enact this plan ASAP.

[unsecretive]

What shall we call it? Operation Splotch and Hero? Operation Get Harry Laid? Operation Get Splotchy Laid? I vote for Operation Gorgeous Veela. Because, my dear, you, Vati, and I are more gorgeous than any french veela girl. And it will sound more conspicuous when we talk about it.

[lady_padma]

I like that last one. Boosts the self-esteem a bit.

It will be one of the most brilliant plans ever hatched in Hogwarts.

[unsecretive]

Of course it will. Whenever we're involved it's always brilliant.

[pretty_vati]

You can't do that!

[unsecretive]

Why on earth not...? Wait, do you have something you need to tell us, Vati?

[pretty_vati]

Like I said to Padma below... Dean and Ginny need our help right now, not Splotchy and Harry.