THE SLOT MACHINE (Oneshot)

Feb 19, 2011 00:25

THE SLOT MACHINE
By: Lady Michaelis
Pairing: Adam Lambert/Kris Allen
Rating: R - NC17
Warnings: Sexual situations, language
Genre: Romance /Erotica
Summary: Adam gets the strangest unbirthday present ever.
Disclaimers: I own nothing-yet.



ART BY orchidfiction


"Happy not-your-birthday, Lambert."

Adam Lambert stared dumbly at the large crate parked in the middle of his living room. Tommy Joe Ratliff was currently perched on it, looking annoyingly pleased with himself. Judging from the smirk on Tommy's face, Adam knew that this 'gift' was going to equal trouble. Tommy was nice enough, yes. Onstage, he gracefully cast aside his masculine pride and allowed Adam to maul his mouth for all it was worth. Offstage, he let Adam cry on his shoulder whenever the flashing lights would interrupt Curt Wild and Brian Slade's tender kiss as a sign of their impending doom. Adam knew him well and loved him dearly, but Tommy had a habit of coming up with the most dangerous gifts. Last time Adam had accepted a non-birthday gift from him, his assistant had been forced to take a temporary leave of absence thanks to several firecracker burns.

The fact that Tommy had personally dragged the crate--okay, so he had some help from the delivery men--into Adam's apartment at ass o' clock in the morning was not a comfort at all.

"...I'm afraid to open it," he confessed.

"Relax, baby boy," Tommy grinned, hopping off the crate to emphasize his point. "I swear on my love for tacos that this does not come equipped with explosive functions. And for your information, I am not the sole bearer of the idea; the rest of the band helped me fund this shit. They asked me to deliver it because I'm the only one who can pick your locks in ten seconds flat."

"And how the fuck did you convince seven other people to buy this for me?"

"Ten, actually. I roped Neil and your parents into the idea, too. Everyone agreed that it might actually keep you busy and celibate for awhile."

"Celibate?" Adam's eyes widened. "What's inside, a one-person church?"

"Sadly, no," Tommy reached for the axe on top of Adam's dining table--good Lord, how on earth did he not notice that?--and gripped it firmly in his hand. "You're going to see what it is in a few seconds, though; I am going to give myself the utmost joy of hacking this crate open for you."

Adam could only watch as Tommy went to town with the axe, looking eerily pleased as he hacked at the crate with fevered, erratic strokes. From the looks of things, it was highly likely that Cam's crack theory of how the act of destroying things with his bare hands and a sharp object was equivalent to an orgasm for Tommy was indeed, the truth.

"Ahhhh, I feel so much better already," Tommy said cheerfully, helping himself to a glass of water from Adam's refrigerator. "So, what do you think?"

"What do I think?" Adam stared. "It's a slot machine. What am I supposed to do with a fucking slot machine, Tommy."

"I'd tell you, but it's going to be so much more fun to see you struggle with it on your own," Tommy grinned. "I love you and I'm forever willing to go as far as sticking my tongue down your throat during shows, but I want you to suffer just this once. Trust me; everything is going to be so worth it once you figure it out."

Adam didn't reply. He just stared at the strange black-and-silver metal contraption that stood at about half his height, half-expecting a gremlin to jump out of it and scream at him.

"Tommy, nothing's happening."

"That's because you're only staring at one half of my little jigsaw puzzle," Tommy said pleasantly. "The other half is still waiting in your foyer. I believe you'll find it more suitable to your interests."

Adam pushed past a still smirking Tommy (how he managed to look so perfect at any damn time of the day was beyond Adam's morning-level comprehension) and practically stormed out of the living room. A tiny, scantily clad brunette was standing in a corner of his hallway, shuffling nervously from foot to foot. As soon as he felt Adam's presence, he squeaked and ducked behind the large potted fern, peering at Adam like a lost bunny in the bushes.

"Ratliff, get your goddamn non-existent ass into my foyer this instant!"

"Don't tell me you don't like him," Tommy arched an eyebrow. "This was the part of our present that I personally picked out for you. I know the kind of men you like digging your nails into, Lambert. If you tell me that this precious little angel isn't your type at all, I am personally going to cram your Grammy award into Danny Gokey's mouth."

"No way in hell are you doing that!" Adam hissed, looking half-disgusted and half-appalled. "Just please explain to me why there is a nearly naked, scared-looking boy with glitter all over his body hiding behind my fishtail swordfern."

"It's a game, baby boy. Once you manage to relate the slot machine with your new friend, you'll figure it out. Now, I really must be heading out; my MASH marathon is waiting for me at home."

As soon as the door shut behind Tommy, Adam turned his attention back to the boy. He looked a little less scared now for some reason, but he didn't seem to want to leave his hiding place.

Adam really couldn't blame him. Things were already frightening as they were.

Getting his new 'friend' out from behind his hiding place was no walk in the park. Adam felt like a criminal trying to take a newborn puppy away from its mother.

Still, ferns didn't really make good mothers.

"I'm not going to hurt you, honey," he said soothingly. "As soon as you crawl out from behind the plant, I can take you back home and kill all my friends for giving birth to this idea in the first place. You can even pick the execution order if you want--but I say Tommy dies first."

"Please don't!" the young man squeaked, practically tumbling out of his hiding place. "I'll give you the code to everything if that's what you want; just please don't send me back to Japan."

"...did you just say 'Japan'?" Adam gaped at him. "Tommy stole you from some sex shop in fucking Japan?"

"Oh, so you haven't been introduced to this kind of game yet," the boy blinked. "It's very popular among the Japanese."

Adam wanted to die. Both the best and the worst things in the world came from Japan. This game was probably the brainchild of a kinky, fucked up idea some wacko had come up with.

"Explain, please," he said weakly.

"Well, the game started out as a part of a bachelor's party package. Basically, the point of the game is that the boy that comes with the machine--me, in this case--performs an action that emerges from whatever combination the machine gives you. For example, if you get two stars and one rainbow, it means I have to give you a blowjob."

"...what the actual fuck?" Adam raked his hands through his hair. "And you've done this before?"

"Actually, no," the boy's face reddened. "This was going to be my first time. You looked really scary when you were yelling at Tommy, so I hid behind the plant. He was very nice to me, though."

"You must understand that I keep blowing up because I'm having a hard time processing all this madness. I'm going to need to sit down for awhile and think of what I'm going to do about all this because I don't think I'm functioning all too well right now. However, I will be a gentleman and fetch you something to wear. I'm Adam, by the way."

"I know," the boy smiled. "I see you on TV a lot. Also, I was able to catch one of your Glam Nation stops in Japan. You were very good. Oh, and you can call me Kris."

"You're not one of those crazy Glamberts who want to have sex with me, right?"

"It'd be fun if I was, but I have to say no to that," Kris giggled. "I'm just some kid trying to make ends meet. I dropped out of college early on, so this was the only option I had. Up to now, I still have no idea why the sex industry was so keen on picking me up."

Adam allowed his eyes to travel down Kris' body. He was tiny but compact and had curves in all the right places.

To quote Tommy, he was exactly Adam's type.

Adam was so fucking screwed.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
It was a bad idea to dress Kris up in one of his silk bathrobes and allow the boy to help himself to half a pint of ice cream coupled with a glass of sparkling cider. To put it mildly, Kris Allen was living twink porn. Adam had watched quite a number of pornos in his lifetime, but even the most explicit ones were no match for Kris and his shy, sensual nature. He had wanted to pick up the phone to yell at Tommy or have his people run a background check on Kris, but Kris had somehow crawled into his lap, causing Adam's brain to short-circuit.

"Did you just get drunk on my French Silk and one fucking glass of sparkling cider?" Adam asked weakly, trying in vain to will his growing erection away.

"Maybe," Kris murmured, happily sucking hickies along the skin of Adam's exposed throat. "Or maybe I'm drunk on you."

Adam groaned. So much for the shy boy act.

"Test it out," Kris urged him, gracelessly tumbling out of Adam's lap to drag him to the otherwise ignored metal contraption sitting in the middle of his living room. "I've always been curious about how it works."

"Can't I just flip you over and screw you on the floor?"

"Nuh-uh," Kris shook his head, smiling cheekily. "The machine is part of the package, remember? I have to do at least some part of my job while I'm at it; I did promise my employers a test run."

Adam growled. No one was allowed to take his Kris on a test run. He was delivered straight to Adam's doorstep, and Adam was intent on keeping Kris for himself like the selfish bastard that he was.

"It runs on rechargeable batteries, so you don't have to worry about anything for awhile," Kris explained casually, flipping a switch on the side. "All you have to do is pull the lever...and I'll do exactly what it tells me to do."

Adam pushed Kris all the way until the latter's back was pressed against the cold steel of the machine. He tilted Kris' chin up for a kiss as he reached around with the other hand to tug at the lever. Kris moaned into his mouth, sucking happily on Adam's tongue as he tried to climb him like a tree.

"Wait, we're going to have to stop if we want to do this right," Kris giggled, squirming away from Adam's demanding arms.

Adam peered down at the slot machine, where three blinking kittens were grinning up at him.

"What does this mean, hmmmm?"

"Easy," Kris smirked, letting the robe slide off his body. "It means that I have to get naked for you."

"Three kittens. Stripping. Right."

Adam felt like someone had shoved a sock into his mouth. Apparently, the sight of a naked Kris wiggling his rather generous behind was enough to get him tongue-tied. He wouldn't be too surprised if he would end up forgetting his name and social security number by the time this was all over.

"You like?" Kris asked softly, running a hand down his torso. "The glitter powder itched a little at first, but the crazy Japanese lady that gets all of us ready said it would add to the allure."

"I'm going to have to keep pulling this thing to get you going, right?" Adam grumbled, reaching out to tug the lever down again. "Please don't tell me there's a combination that equates to you putting your clothes back on; I think I might die."

"Oh, no," Kris giggled. "It's a sex game, remember? Once you get me naked, that's how I'm going to stay; it'd be silly if I had to put my clothes back on at some point."

Adam merely nodded, not trusting himself to say anything as he watched the spinning reels slow to a stop. Seriously, the whole thing was killing him.

A star. A blue bird. A rabbit.

"Try again, baby," Kris cooed, snaking a leg around Adam's thigh as he shamelessly rubbed against him. "Not all combinations equate to a sexual favor; life would be too easy for all of us if that were the case."

Adam felt like kicking the machine. Clearly, it was not for the sexually frustrated. Still, that didn't stop him from reaching for the lever once again. He deserved a pat on the back for being such a martyr.

"Ooh, two bears and a heart. I think you just got lucky--or rather, we both did."

"And this merits what, exactly?"

"A sixty-nine."

Adam was going to die. He was going to die and go straight to Sex Heaven where Kris Allen would be waiting for him behind the pearly gates.

"Wow, I can't believe I'm going to come face-to-cock with the famous glambulge," Kris chuckled, dropping to his knees to pull down Adam's sleep pants. "I'm pretty sure I'm the envy of all the unlucky girls and gay boys who have never gotten the chance to get a grope before."

At this point, Adam was usually ready with an equally witty remark to keep the banter going, but Kris' hands on his cock were just way too distracting.

"Hold it, babe," he said, chuckling at the slightly hurt look on Kris' face when Adam nudged his cock away from his lips. "We should get comfortable so I can take care of you, too."

They shifted around on the floor until they were draped atop each other in an inverse manner. Adam grinned as he nibbled at the flesh of Kris' ass, a hand slipping down to toy with his cock. A feeling of triumph surged in him when he heard Kris gasp, perfect body arching up into Adam's touch.

"Gonna make this feel so good for you, baby."

He ran his tongue down Kris' crack, moaning softly when he felt Kris suck his cock into his mouth. There was just something about mutual pleasure that turned Adam on; he got a high out of knowing that his partner was feeling just as good as he was.

"Open for me, Kris," he murmured, nudging at Kris' hole with his tongue. "Wanna taste you so fucking bad."

"Fuck, Adam," Kris moaned, releasing Adam from his mouth in favor of giving him a handjob. "I want this inside of me; I want you to fill me up like I've never been filled before."

Adam smirked. He was going to make Kris Allen question everything his parents had ever taught him about sex.

"You'll be so glad you met me, Kris Allen."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
 “Oh, fuuuuuuck!” Kris moaned, pushing his hips upward to meet Adam’s thrusts. “Just like that, Adam; oh yeah, fuck me! Fuck me hard.”

They had foregone the game in the face of the primal need for sex. Adam had pushed Kris down on the arm of the sofa and had pushed into him without much preamble. Kris had already been wet and open thanks to the tongue bath that Adam had given his hole, and was, much to Adam’s delight, a very willing bottom. He gave as much as he took, and the raw sensuality of his very being ate at Adam’s heart like a rather welcome parasite.

It was almost like falling in love, really.

“I’m close,” he muttered, reaching around them to grip Kris’ cock. “Come with me.”

He moaned as Kris’ hole tightened around him and exhaled with a whoosh as he came, stroking Kris through the aftershocks as he came with the help of Adam’s hand. The spent couple collapsed against the sofa, Kris’ head resting on Adam’s shoulder. Breathless laughter escaped their throats as they struggled to get their breathing back to normal.

“Christ, that was fucking amazing!” Adam chuckled. “Tommy was right; I did need to get laid. Is there any way I can keep you, beautiful?”

“Maybe,” Kris said with a giggle, burrowing his face into the crook of Adam’s neck. “I think I could get to like it here. It’s not Japan, but I could get another job.”

Adam laughed and caught Kris’ lips in a hard kiss, feeling his cock begin to harden once more. Yes; he was definitely keeping this jewel of a boy around.

Screw Japan.

kris allen, kradam, kradamadness, adam lambert, tommy joe ratliff, fanfiction

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