Lament for What May Have Never Been
Black in the shadow
In the swirling color vortex of pain inside these
Feelings strong with too much sensation to be bound in words
Like crystal glasses full of blood red intoxicating juices
Lingering slowly by the bedside in the morning before the world stirs
Before your breaths grow quiet with awaking and your eyes alert
Before
And in one moment there is peace but not a peace remembered from childhood
Before the world was loud and crowded with confusing people and emotions
That peace is out of the reach of my stretching fingers
Forever now
Left behind and not enough loved while it lasted
Before I learned to speak or walk, almost
Before I myself was the enemy of those I love
Before
And there is no recovering that sweet small child
She’s gone.