(no subject)
I meant to post this earlier. Let me do that now. Sherlock Holmes review is forthcoming.
List 10 of your favorite players in random order (without looking at the questions). Then answer the questions. (I picked someone from the WC and someone from the EC for each and answered twice.)
Western
1) Jason Arnott
2) Sheldon Souray
3) Sean O'Donnell
4) Scott Niedermayer
5) Paul Kariya
6) Douglas Murray
7) Petr Sykora
8) Brian Rafalski
9) Jarret Stoll
10) Paul StastnyEastern
1) Scott Stevens
2) Daniel Carcillo
3) Marc Savard
4) Ilya Kovalchuk
5) Brian Rolston
6) Vincent Lecavalier
7) Dominic Moore
8) Sean Avery
9) Michael Camalleri
10) Mario Lemieux
1. Number 5 [Paul (STL), Brian (NJD)] was stranded on the toilet because he was out of paper what would you do?
What would I do? Well, first of all, why am I in the boys' bathroom? But after that, and if Paul didn't faint from embarrassment, I'd give them a new roll.
2. You came home one day and found Number 3 [Sean (LAK), Marc (BOS)] and Number 7 [Petr (MIN), Dominic (FLA)] in your house, both drunk out of their minds?
Laugh. First of all, I'd have to laugh. Sean and Petr have both been Devils and Wilds, but not together, but Sean's buddies with everyone when he's drunk so that'd be fun, even if Petr is a sad drunk. Marc and Dominic both make quiet morose drunks. They could have a deep conversation about not falling for the wrong person. Very deep. I'd listen in.
3. Number 8 [Brian (DET), Sean (NYR)] offered to fix the plumbing problems with your house?
Laugh my ass off. Sean wouldn't know the right end of the wrench to use and he would not be able to fix my plumbing. Now Brian, on the other hand, might be able to work with his hands. I don't know if he can fix plumbing, but I'd trust him to do it before I'd trust Sean.
4. Number 2 [Sheldon (EDM), Danny (PHI)] showed up at school as your substitute teacher for the day?
More laughing. Dear gods, Danny would be the worst sub ever. Or best, if you ask the kids. He'd let them do anything they wanted. They'd ruin the school and be running around outside! And not get a bit of work done. Sheldon would be better, he can at least handle kids and be stern. Well, stern'ish. At least he'd be able to keep their attention.
5. You accidentally saw Number 10 [Paul (COL), Mario (PIT)] wearing nothing but a small, purple Speedo?
Um. I don't think I'd care for it, to be honest. Can I have Danny and Sheldon from the question before in this question?
6. Number 3 [Sean (LAK), Marc (BOS)] insisted on driving you around town to wherever you wanted to go for the entire day?
Oh that'd be so fun! Both of them would be fun to spend the day with, especially going around Boston. He can drive, and I'll just enjoy the ride.
7. Number 9 [Jarret (LAK), Michael (MTL)] killed Number 4 [Scott (ANA), Ilya (ATL)] right in front of you?
Jarret killing Scott (in the TV sense, not really dead) would crack me the hell up. It would be so justified and so very fic'worthy. Michael killing Ilya is random, except that their people are both playing for the Sharks right now. You never know what happens out there in California.
WOULD YOU ALLOW:
1. Number 6 [Douglas (SJS), Vinny (TBL)] to redecorate your house for you, however they see fit?
*laughs out loud* Vinny, of course! He'd do a better job than I would. He can buy my clothes too, if he wants. Douglas, though, I don't know. I'm resisting the obvious Ikea joke here.
2. Number 1 [Jason (NAS), Scott (NJD)] to be your dentist and work in your mouth with a drill?
If I can look at them (or listen to them) while they work? That might actually make going to the dentist fun. I actually love the idea of this really.
3. Number 10 [Paul (COL), Mario (PIT)] and Number 5 [Paul (STL), Brian (NJD)] to be left alone in your house or apartment?
Paul Stastny would upset Paul Kariya. He's much too brash and, well, a Stastny, for a Kariya. It would not be a good thing at all to leave them alone. Mario would talk too much for Brian's tastes, but they wouldn't get into any trouble, so they could crash at my place.
4. Number 8 [Brian (DET), Sean (NYR)] some of your clothes and wear them in public?
Brian would be just fine in my t-shirts and jeans, which is what I wear most of the time. But Sean, oh no, he would not approve of how 'boringly' I dress. I don't own anything designer or one article of clothing that costs more than a car payment. He would not want my clothes.
5. Number 2 [Sheldon (EDM), Danny (PHI)] to try to fix your computer when it's messed up?
Um, no, I don't think so. I don't think either of them know enough about computers to have a clue how to fix one and I'm sure Danny can't sit still that long.
6. Number 4 [Scott (ANA), Ilya (ATL)] to set you up on a date with Number 9 [Jarret (LAK), Michael (MTL)]?
Would I let Scott set me up with Jarret? I wouldn't let Scott mess with Chris like that. Because that's what it would be and Scott knows better. Ilya setting me up with Michael is odd, and I'm trying to see how that could relate back to San Jose, but it's not working in my head.
7. Number 1 [Jason (NAS), Scott (NJD)] and Number 3 [Sean (LAK), Marc (BOS)] to operate heavy machinery together?
Jason and Sean might have some fun with that. Especially back in the day. But then again, back in the day, they could have caused a lot of problems with that, so probably not. But Scott and Marc would get the job done, in a very efficient way with Scott giving orders and Marc following them. So they can do it.
RELATIONSHIP SECTION:
1. Number 5 [Paul (STL), Brian (NJD)] asks Number 2 [Sheldon (EDM), Danny (PHI)] out on a date. Upon seeing this, what do you do or say?
I would be very concerned. Paul could not handle Sheldon at all! And shouldn't be thinking such things. Heavens! As for Brian, back in the day he would have had a grand ol' time with Danny, but now, he's much too boring for the kid. Not that Danny would say no to someone with a slapshot like that, but Brian shouldn't ask!
2. Number 7 [Petr (MIN), Dominic (FLA)] asks you to a dance. Do you accept?
Yes, please. I'd love to dance with Petr. Really, that'd be enough for me, he can just say anything and dance and have his hair and I'm a-okay. Dominic is adorable, and I'd dance with him, but I'd have more fun sitting and talking.
3. Number 8 [Brian (DET), Sean (NYR)] and Number 9 [Paul (COL), Mario (PIT)] are fighting over you. What happens now?
Either set makes me laugh. Brian and Paul can do best out of five scoring chances, with Paul shooting and Brian defending. I'll take the winner. Mario would put Sean down and that would be that. Because Mario is just like that when he wants something.
4. Number 1 [Jason (NAS), Scott (NJD)] tries to kiss you. What do you do?
Melt. Jason... yeah, okay, a happy place is just thinking about that. Scott less so, but I'm not saying no, just for the experience of having kissed Scott.
5. Number 3 [Sean (LAK), Marc (BOS)] confesses his secret love for Number 5 [Paul (STL), Brian (NJD)]. What do you think of this?
Knowing that Sean played with Teemu, I'd wonder what he thought he'd get out of that confession. Paul's not anywhere near his type either. Marc loving Brian would be a crack-fueled dream because I don't think they even know each other, they've never played together or even close to it.
6. Number 6 [Douglas (SJS), Vinny (TBL)] is cheating on Number 7 [Petr (MIN), Dominic (FLA)] with Number 3 [Sean (LAK), Marc (BOS)], and you find out about it. What do you do?
Douglas is dating Sean but sleeping with Petr. I want to watch. No, really. That would be so hot. And I'd tell Douglas that he'd be better with Sean than Petr, because Petr is delicate and Sean could totally take it. Vinny is dating Dominic but sleeping with Marc. Well first of all, Vinny shouldn't date Dominic, that just wouldn't work out, but Vinny sleeping with Marc has something to do with Marty or Timmy, I'm sure. And I'd tell Vinny to stop fucking around on Brad. Period.
7. Number 4 [Scott (ANA), Ilya (ATL)] proposes to you. Your reaction?
Oh I'd gladly be the press wife for either of them. In a second. Ilya, I'd just spend his money and take care of his kids, and book his flights to San Jose. For Scott, I'd love to have conversations about everything, plus taking care of his kids and booking his flights. And letting the other Scott clean my house.
RANDOM NONSENSE:
1. What in the name of Holy Rabbit Dogs was Number 1 [Jason (NAS), Scott (NJD)] doing outside in nothing but a small pink towel at 3 AM!?
Jason was kicked out of the house by JP because he's having a French episode, and I will gladly let him into my house. Scott was probably drunk many years ago and had an affair and tried to leave and couldn't find his clothes. Really, Scott should know better.
2. What if Number 2 [Sheldon (EDM), Danny (PHI)] tied Number 4 [Scott (ANA), Ilya (ATL)] to a flagpole and threw shoes at him until he cries?
If Danny tied anyone to anything, it would not be to throw things at them. And the image of Ilya tied up by Danny is so wrong and so hot. Along those same lines, Sheldon tying up Scott would be hotter than I should fantasise about and would also never happen.
3. ... and then Number 8 [Brian (DET), Sean (NYR)] and Number 5 [Paul (STL), Brian (NJD)] danced around the table naked. Your reaction upon seeing this?
I would be surprised that the one vicodin I took was effecting me that much. Paul doesn't dance around naked. But Brian and Sean would be some kind of show. I could almost see that, performance art style.
4. Number 10 [Paul (COL), Mario (PIT)] has just officially been given a Pyro License. What happens now?
Dear gods almighty, do not give Paul fire! Mario might just use it to make a grand entrance, but Paul would destroy things. It would not end well.
5. Would YOU tell Number 9 [Jarret (LAK), Michael (MTL)] to "WOO! TAKE IT ALL OFF!"...?
Hmm, neither are drop dead gorgeous, but they both would be pretty fun to watch strip because I think they could have some moves. So sure, I'd be into that.
6. What was Number 6 [Douglas (SJS), Vinny (TBL)] in prison for?
Assault. If Douglas did half the things he does on the ice, off it, he'd be in jail a lot. For Vinny, he would only assault someone off the ice, if they upset Brad. But that would happen.
7. What if, suddenly, Number 4 [Scott (ANA), Ilya (ATL)] smashed through the wall of your room totally naked, posed, and shouted "OHHHH YEEEEAAAAH!"...?
I'd really wonder about that vicodin, because that would be the style of either of them. They're not big 'strike a pose' guys.
WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF:
1.Number 1 [Jason (NAS), Scott (NJD)] woke you up in the middle of the night?
My first thought was, I'd say "Again?! Aren't you tired?"
2. Number 2 [Sheldon (EDM), Danny (PHI)] asked you to go out with him?
Tell them it'd have to be a double date. Oh yes, especially Sheldon and Jose. That would be a fantastic double date. Goalies and D, it just works. Danny and Nicky would also be a really hot double date, but I don't know if my girlfriend would let me.
3. Number 3 [Sean (LAK), Marc (BOS)] walked into the bathroom while you're showering?
Probably talk with them while I showered. Especially Sean. There's not a lot of dirty 'come shower with me' here, I'd rather be their buddy and chat while I was showering. They can shave or some such.
4. Number 4 [Scott (ANA), Ilya (ATL)] cooked you dinner?
Tease Scott that he's getting to be too much like Marty. And wonder where Ilya got the food, because he doesn't cook, but I'd be happy to try real Russian food.
5. Number 5 [Paul (STL), Brian (NJD)] was lying next to you on the beach, sleeping?
I'd be concerned about Paul burning, he's so Finnish pale! I'd put the umbrella over him. Brian's just fine, he can keep sleeping. I'd have to keep the twins from burring him in the sand.
6. Number 8 [Brian (DET), Sean (NYR)] got into the hospital somehow?
I'd feel so bad for Sean, he was just in the hospital not too long ago, he doesn't need to go through that again. But for him, he gets magazines and good food sneaked in. Brian gets his kids sneaked in to visit him, because that would distract him from whatever was the matter.
7. Number 9 [Jarret (LAK), Michael (MTL)] made fun of your friends?
I'd wonder what my friend said to them. Michael isn't really a 'making fun' type, he's more a 'plot revenge' type, unless making fun includes sarcasm, in which case my friend probably deserved it. Jarret doesn't really mock, but he does tease, and usually the person likes it.
8. Number 10 [Paul (COL), Mario (PIT)] ignored you all the time?
I'd assume they were bored with me and I'd move on. They're both like that with their dalliances.
WHAT WOULD THEY DO UNDER THE FOLLOWING CIRCUMSTANCES?
1. Two serial killers are hunting you down. What will Number 1 [Jason (NAS), Scott (NJD)] do?
They've both been known to get really fuckin' scary when they need to. I'd feel pretty safe with them.
2. You're on a vacation with Number 2 [Sheldon (EDM), Danny (PHI)] and you manage to break your leg. What does Number 2 do?
Danny would laugh at me for breaking my leg in the first place and I'd have to bitch at him because that's how I get when I'm in a lot of pain. And then Sheldon would be really good at taking care of me and Danny would entertain me while I was laid up.
3. It's your birthday. What will 3 [Sean (LAK), Marc (BOS)] give you?
Marc would come up with something thoughtful and personal and sweet and be very proud of himself to give it. Sean would more likely come up with something to do or somewhere to go than come up with an item and it wouldn't be sweet in the least but it would be personal.
4. You're stuck in a house that's on fire. What does Number 4 [Scott (ANA), Ilya (ATL)] do?
Scott would call the fire department, because that's what you do when something is on fire. Ilya would as well, but there wouldn't be English so I would hope he'd just let Scott make the call.
5. You're about to do something that'll make you feel extremely embarrassed. What will Number 5 [Paul (STL), Brian (NJD)] do?
Paul would sit me down and explain that doing this thing will be very embarrassing and I probably shouldn't do it. He won't tell me not to, but he would suggest it's not a good idea. Brian would sit back and watch.
6. You're about to marry Number 10 [Paul (COL), Mario (PIT)]. What's Number 6's [Douglas (SJS), Vinny (TBL)] reaction?
In the first place, why am I marrying Paul or Mario? This does not seem like a good idea. Vinny could get into helping me plan the wedding, but I don't think Douglas could care less.
7. You got dumped by someone. How will Number 7 [Petr (MIN), Dominic (FLA)] cheer you up?
Well, Dominic and I could walk around Boston and talk, that would make me feel a lot better. And then, Petr could be my rebound.
8. You're angry about it afterwards, how does Number 8 [Brian (DET), Sean (NYR)] calm you down?
Sean isn't so good with the calming down thing. He doesn't necessarily get riled often, but when he does, it's quite the explosion. I think fight therapy would be in order there. Maybe Brian could find some inner Swedish and help me calm down, but somehow I doubt it.
9. You compete in some tournament. How does Number 9 [Jarret (LAK), Michael (MTL)] support you?
Michael would come up with some pretty good plans on how I can win the tournament, because I do have to win, that's a rule. Jarret's a pretty good cheerleader. He'd hang out in the friends and family section and cheer me on.
10. You can't stop laughing. What will Number 10 [Paul (COL), Mario (PIT)] do?
Paul would probably start laughing too. Mario would look disapproving.
RELATIONSHIP PART:
1. Is Number 1 [Jason (NAS), Scott (NJD)] is all you've ever dreamed of?
If I could put them into one person and make them female, yes, pretty much exactly.
2. Number 2 [Sheldon (EDM), Danny (PHI)] tells you about his deeply hidden love for Number 9 [Jarret (LAK), Michael (MTL)]. Your reaction?
I'd wonder how they know each other. Danny and Michael could get along to a point, but I don't see any deeply hidden love happening there. Sheldon is rather Jarret's type, so that could be interesting in reverse, but I don't see Sheldon going younger.
3. You're dating Number 3 [Sean (LAK), Marc (BOS)] and introduce him to your parents. Will they get along?
If my mother could get past her idea that Marc kicks puppies, yes, she would like that a lot. She does already like him because of what I told her about what he did for Phil and Ilya, so I think she'd like the idea of it at least. As for Sean? He can make a good impression on mothers, but if she knew how he really was? Probably not.
4. Number 4 [Scott (ANA), Ilya (ATL)] loves Number 9 [Jarret (LAK), Michael (MTL)] as well. What does that mean?
My mind is trying to wrap around a world in which Scott loves Jarret. It hurts my mind too much. Must stop thinking about it. If Ilya had met Michael years ago, well, they might be able to work. But yet again, there's something going on with San Jose here. They need to stop being in the same questions!
5. Number 6 [Douglas (SJS), Vinny (TBL)] appears to be a player, he breaks many hearts. What do you do?
Well, in the sense of 'you can look but you can't touch', they both are. And what do I do about it? Look!
6. You had a haircut and Number 7 [Petr (MIN), Dominic (FLA)] can't stop looking at you. What goes on in your mind?
Well, I'd be flattered coming from Dominic, but from Petr, I'd be worried that I have a mullet.
7. Number 8 [Brian (DET), Sean (NYR)] thinks he'll never get a girlfriend. What will you tell him?
Yes, Sean, I think that's true. You've had lots of pretty beards, but I don't think you'll ever get a real girlfriend because you're simply too gay. And Brian, I don't think your wife would care for you getting a girlfriend. For that matter, I don't think your boyfriend would either.
8. Number 9 [Jarret (LAK), Michael (MTL)] is too shy to face you and confesses their love by sending you an e-mail. Now what?
The idea of either of them being 'too shy' cracks me the hell up. But if they'd like me to be their covers, I'd be more than happy to do that, they can ask me by e-mail.
FRIENDSHIP PART 2:
1. Could Number 1 [Jason (NAS), Scott (NJD)] and Number 6 [Douglas (SJS), Vinny (TBL)] be soul mates?
Jason and Douglas is such a pretty picture. No, they couldn't be soulmates, but oh that would be pretty to watch. Scott and Vinny really couldn't be. Not at all. They couldn't even be friends, they're just too different.
2. Would Number 2 [Sheldon (EDM), Danny (PHI)] trust Number 5 [Paul (STL), Brian (NJD)]?
Everyone can trust Paul. Every single person on the planet. So yes, Sheldon should. Danny doesn't trust anyone, so I don't see him trusting someone on a division rival team, but all in all Brian is trustworthy. Nicky could tell him that.
3. Number 3 [Sean (LAK), Marc (BOS)] wants to go shopping, will Number 7 [Petr (MIN), Dominic (FLA)] come along?
Sean shopping with Petr. That kinda broke my brain. No, I don't think so. And Marc and Dominic? Well, they both know Boston? Um, no, I can't see them shopping either.
4. Number 4 [Scott (ANA), Ilya (ATL)] is bored and pokes Number 10 [Paul (COL), Mario (PIT)]. What happens after that?
Scott really shouldn't poke Paul. Considering Peter was a Devil when Scott rookied, that would really be somewhere they don't want to go. At all. Ever. *shudders* Ilya poking Mario is an image I will now need brain bleach to remove, thank you.
5. Number 5 [Paul (STL), Brian (NJD)] and Number 1 [Jason (NAS), Scott (NJD)] are forced to go back to school together. What study will they pick?
Paul and Jason get along very well, though I would think them going back to school would consist of Paul working very hard and Jason copying off him and then Jason protecting Paul from bullies. It would work. Brian and Scott could perhaps attend music school. Scott could expand his knowledge to pass it on to his kids and Brian can just become a rocker. It would make for an amusing sitcom.
6. If Number 6 [Douglas (SJS), Vinny (TBL)] and Number 3 [Sean (LAK), Marc (BOS)] cooked dinner, what would they make?
Sean enjoys cooking and would tell Douglas to just sit down and make conversation. I have no idea what they'd talk about, the Pacific Division, I guess. Marc and Vinny could actually create a meal together, though. They're both okay in the kitchen, together they could actually make something. I don't know why the Bruins and the Lightning are having a massive team dinner, but I'd blame Marty.
7. Number 5 [Paul (STL), Brian (NJD)] and Number 8 [Brian (DET), Sean (NYR)] apply for a job. What job?
Working in fashion. No wait, listen to how this works. Sean is obvious. Paul could easily be a model. Brian Rolston can play a live soundtrack for the runway show. And Brian Rafalski can be a photographer. Don't ask me, it just happens in my head.
8. Number 8 [Brian (DET), Sean (NYR)] gives Number 7 [Petr (MIN), Dominic (FLA)] a haircut. Is that OK?
No! Brian may not go anywhere near Petr's hair. Brian has no hair, he may not remove Petr's! Sean could possibly work with Dominic's though. He would need to grow it out some, but that could work.
9. Number 9 [Jarret (LAK), Michael (MTL)] sketches what Number 1's [Jason (NAS), Scott (NJD)] perfect girlfriend/boyfriend should look like.
Somehow I don't see this ending well. I don't think Jarret and Jason know each other, but I don't want to know what Michael would come up with for someone like Scott, whom he would only know by reputation. Now, if I can switch that up, Jarret could draw Michael's and Jason could draw Scott's, or vice versa. And they'd have some pretty good ideas.
10. Number 10 [Paul (COL), Mario (PIT)] and Number 3 [Sean (LAK), Marc (BOS)] are blushing while they talk. What is their conversation about?
Oh dear gods, anything that could make any of them blush, besides Marc, has to be somewhere seriously beyond raunchy. I don't think Paul or Sean can blush, and the only way to make Mario blush could be to call him out on being a dope. But even then, I don't know. Marc, though, he could blush if someone brought up certain mistakes in his past.
That was fun! Should I do it for baseball too?
List 10 of your favorite players in random order (without looking at the questions). Then answer the questions. (I picked someone from the WC and someone from the EC for each and answered twice.)
Western
1) Jason Arnott
2) Sheldon Souray
3) Sean O'Donnell
4) Scott Niedermayer
5) Paul Kariya
6) Douglas Murray
7) Petr Sykora
8) Brian Rafalski
9) Jarret Stoll
10) Paul StastnyEastern
1) Scott Stevens
2) Daniel Carcillo
3) Marc Savard
4) Ilya Kovalchuk
5) Brian Rolston
6) Vincent Lecavalier
7) Dominic Moore
8) Sean Avery
9) Michael Camalleri
10) Mario Lemieux
1. Number 5 [Paul (STL), Brian (NJD)] was stranded on the toilet because he was out of paper what would you do?
What would I do? Well, first of all, why am I in the boys' bathroom? But after that, and if Paul didn't faint from embarrassment, I'd give them a new roll.
2. You came home one day and found Number 3 [Sean (LAK), Marc (BOS)] and Number 7 [Petr (MIN), Dominic (FLA)] in your house, both drunk out of their minds?
Laugh. First of all, I'd have to laugh. Sean and Petr have both been Devils and Wilds, but not together, but Sean's buddies with everyone when he's drunk so that'd be fun, even if Petr is a sad drunk. Marc and Dominic both make quiet morose drunks. They could have a deep conversation about not falling for the wrong person. Very deep. I'd listen in.
3. Number 8 [Brian (DET), Sean (NYR)] offered to fix the plumbing problems with your house?
Laugh my ass off. Sean wouldn't know the right end of the wrench to use and he would not be able to fix my plumbing. Now Brian, on the other hand, might be able to work with his hands. I don't know if he can fix plumbing, but I'd trust him to do it before I'd trust Sean.
4. Number 2 [Sheldon (EDM), Danny (PHI)] showed up at school as your substitute teacher for the day?
More laughing. Dear gods, Danny would be the worst sub ever. Or best, if you ask the kids. He'd let them do anything they wanted. They'd ruin the school and be running around outside! And not get a bit of work done. Sheldon would be better, he can at least handle kids and be stern. Well, stern'ish. At least he'd be able to keep their attention.
5. You accidentally saw Number 10 [Paul (COL), Mario (PIT)] wearing nothing but a small, purple Speedo?
Um. I don't think I'd care for it, to be honest. Can I have Danny and Sheldon from the question before in this question?
6. Number 3 [Sean (LAK), Marc (BOS)] insisted on driving you around town to wherever you wanted to go for the entire day?
Oh that'd be so fun! Both of them would be fun to spend the day with, especially going around Boston. He can drive, and I'll just enjoy the ride.
7. Number 9 [Jarret (LAK), Michael (MTL)] killed Number 4 [Scott (ANA), Ilya (ATL)] right in front of you?
Jarret killing Scott (in the TV sense, not really dead) would crack me the hell up. It would be so justified and so very fic'worthy. Michael killing Ilya is random, except that their people are both playing for the Sharks right now. You never know what happens out there in California.
WOULD YOU ALLOW:
1. Number 6 [Douglas (SJS), Vinny (TBL)] to redecorate your house for you, however they see fit?
*laughs out loud* Vinny, of course! He'd do a better job than I would. He can buy my clothes too, if he wants. Douglas, though, I don't know. I'm resisting the obvious Ikea joke here.
2. Number 1 [Jason (NAS), Scott (NJD)] to be your dentist and work in your mouth with a drill?
If I can look at them (or listen to them) while they work? That might actually make going to the dentist fun. I actually love the idea of this really.
3. Number 10 [Paul (COL), Mario (PIT)] and Number 5 [Paul (STL), Brian (NJD)] to be left alone in your house or apartment?
Paul Stastny would upset Paul Kariya. He's much too brash and, well, a Stastny, for a Kariya. It would not be a good thing at all to leave them alone. Mario would talk too much for Brian's tastes, but they wouldn't get into any trouble, so they could crash at my place.
4. Number 8 [Brian (DET), Sean (NYR)] some of your clothes and wear them in public?
Brian would be just fine in my t-shirts and jeans, which is what I wear most of the time. But Sean, oh no, he would not approve of how 'boringly' I dress. I don't own anything designer or one article of clothing that costs more than a car payment. He would not want my clothes.
5. Number 2 [Sheldon (EDM), Danny (PHI)] to try to fix your computer when it's messed up?
Um, no, I don't think so. I don't think either of them know enough about computers to have a clue how to fix one and I'm sure Danny can't sit still that long.
6. Number 4 [Scott (ANA), Ilya (ATL)] to set you up on a date with Number 9 [Jarret (LAK), Michael (MTL)]?
Would I let Scott set me up with Jarret? I wouldn't let Scott mess with Chris like that. Because that's what it would be and Scott knows better. Ilya setting me up with Michael is odd, and I'm trying to see how that could relate back to San Jose, but it's not working in my head.
7. Number 1 [Jason (NAS), Scott (NJD)] and Number 3 [Sean (LAK), Marc (BOS)] to operate heavy machinery together?
Jason and Sean might have some fun with that. Especially back in the day. But then again, back in the day, they could have caused a lot of problems with that, so probably not. But Scott and Marc would get the job done, in a very efficient way with Scott giving orders and Marc following them. So they can do it.
RELATIONSHIP SECTION:
1. Number 5 [Paul (STL), Brian (NJD)] asks Number 2 [Sheldon (EDM), Danny (PHI)] out on a date. Upon seeing this, what do you do or say?
I would be very concerned. Paul could not handle Sheldon at all! And shouldn't be thinking such things. Heavens! As for Brian, back in the day he would have had a grand ol' time with Danny, but now, he's much too boring for the kid. Not that Danny would say no to someone with a slapshot like that, but Brian shouldn't ask!
2. Number 7 [Petr (MIN), Dominic (FLA)] asks you to a dance. Do you accept?
Yes, please. I'd love to dance with Petr. Really, that'd be enough for me, he can just say anything and dance and have his hair and I'm a-okay. Dominic is adorable, and I'd dance with him, but I'd have more fun sitting and talking.
3. Number 8 [Brian (DET), Sean (NYR)] and Number 9 [Paul (COL), Mario (PIT)] are fighting over you. What happens now?
Either set makes me laugh. Brian and Paul can do best out of five scoring chances, with Paul shooting and Brian defending. I'll take the winner. Mario would put Sean down and that would be that. Because Mario is just like that when he wants something.
4. Number 1 [Jason (NAS), Scott (NJD)] tries to kiss you. What do you do?
Melt. Jason... yeah, okay, a happy place is just thinking about that. Scott less so, but I'm not saying no, just for the experience of having kissed Scott.
5. Number 3 [Sean (LAK), Marc (BOS)] confesses his secret love for Number 5 [Paul (STL), Brian (NJD)]. What do you think of this?
Knowing that Sean played with Teemu, I'd wonder what he thought he'd get out of that confession. Paul's not anywhere near his type either. Marc loving Brian would be a crack-fueled dream because I don't think they even know each other, they've never played together or even close to it.
6. Number 6 [Douglas (SJS), Vinny (TBL)] is cheating on Number 7 [Petr (MIN), Dominic (FLA)] with Number 3 [Sean (LAK), Marc (BOS)], and you find out about it. What do you do?
Douglas is dating Sean but sleeping with Petr. I want to watch. No, really. That would be so hot. And I'd tell Douglas that he'd be better with Sean than Petr, because Petr is delicate and Sean could totally take it. Vinny is dating Dominic but sleeping with Marc. Well first of all, Vinny shouldn't date Dominic, that just wouldn't work out, but Vinny sleeping with Marc has something to do with Marty or Timmy, I'm sure. And I'd tell Vinny to stop fucking around on Brad. Period.
7. Number 4 [Scott (ANA), Ilya (ATL)] proposes to you. Your reaction?
Oh I'd gladly be the press wife for either of them. In a second. Ilya, I'd just spend his money and take care of his kids, and book his flights to San Jose. For Scott, I'd love to have conversations about everything, plus taking care of his kids and booking his flights. And letting the other Scott clean my house.
RANDOM NONSENSE:
1. What in the name of Holy Rabbit Dogs was Number 1 [Jason (NAS), Scott (NJD)] doing outside in nothing but a small pink towel at 3 AM!?
Jason was kicked out of the house by JP because he's having a French episode, and I will gladly let him into my house. Scott was probably drunk many years ago and had an affair and tried to leave and couldn't find his clothes. Really, Scott should know better.
2. What if Number 2 [Sheldon (EDM), Danny (PHI)] tied Number 4 [Scott (ANA), Ilya (ATL)] to a flagpole and threw shoes at him until he cries?
If Danny tied anyone to anything, it would not be to throw things at them. And the image of Ilya tied up by Danny is so wrong and so hot. Along those same lines, Sheldon tying up Scott would be hotter than I should fantasise about and would also never happen.
3. ... and then Number 8 [Brian (DET), Sean (NYR)] and Number 5 [Paul (STL), Brian (NJD)] danced around the table naked. Your reaction upon seeing this?
I would be surprised that the one vicodin I took was effecting me that much. Paul doesn't dance around naked. But Brian and Sean would be some kind of show. I could almost see that, performance art style.
4. Number 10 [Paul (COL), Mario (PIT)] has just officially been given a Pyro License. What happens now?
Dear gods almighty, do not give Paul fire! Mario might just use it to make a grand entrance, but Paul would destroy things. It would not end well.
5. Would YOU tell Number 9 [Jarret (LAK), Michael (MTL)] to "WOO! TAKE IT ALL OFF!"...?
Hmm, neither are drop dead gorgeous, but they both would be pretty fun to watch strip because I think they could have some moves. So sure, I'd be into that.
6. What was Number 6 [Douglas (SJS), Vinny (TBL)] in prison for?
Assault. If Douglas did half the things he does on the ice, off it, he'd be in jail a lot. For Vinny, he would only assault someone off the ice, if they upset Brad. But that would happen.
7. What if, suddenly, Number 4 [Scott (ANA), Ilya (ATL)] smashed through the wall of your room totally naked, posed, and shouted "OHHHH YEEEEAAAAH!"...?
I'd really wonder about that vicodin, because that would be the style of either of them. They're not big 'strike a pose' guys.
WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF:
1.Number 1 [Jason (NAS), Scott (NJD)] woke you up in the middle of the night?
My first thought was, I'd say "Again?! Aren't you tired?"
2. Number 2 [Sheldon (EDM), Danny (PHI)] asked you to go out with him?
Tell them it'd have to be a double date. Oh yes, especially Sheldon and Jose. That would be a fantastic double date. Goalies and D, it just works. Danny and Nicky would also be a really hot double date, but I don't know if my girlfriend would let me.
3. Number 3 [Sean (LAK), Marc (BOS)] walked into the bathroom while you're showering?
Probably talk with them while I showered. Especially Sean. There's not a lot of dirty 'come shower with me' here, I'd rather be their buddy and chat while I was showering. They can shave or some such.
4. Number 4 [Scott (ANA), Ilya (ATL)] cooked you dinner?
Tease Scott that he's getting to be too much like Marty. And wonder where Ilya got the food, because he doesn't cook, but I'd be happy to try real Russian food.
5. Number 5 [Paul (STL), Brian (NJD)] was lying next to you on the beach, sleeping?
I'd be concerned about Paul burning, he's so Finnish pale! I'd put the umbrella over him. Brian's just fine, he can keep sleeping. I'd have to keep the twins from burring him in the sand.
6. Number 8 [Brian (DET), Sean (NYR)] got into the hospital somehow?
I'd feel so bad for Sean, he was just in the hospital not too long ago, he doesn't need to go through that again. But for him, he gets magazines and good food sneaked in. Brian gets his kids sneaked in to visit him, because that would distract him from whatever was the matter.
7. Number 9 [Jarret (LAK), Michael (MTL)] made fun of your friends?
I'd wonder what my friend said to them. Michael isn't really a 'making fun' type, he's more a 'plot revenge' type, unless making fun includes sarcasm, in which case my friend probably deserved it. Jarret doesn't really mock, but he does tease, and usually the person likes it.
8. Number 10 [Paul (COL), Mario (PIT)] ignored you all the time?
I'd assume they were bored with me and I'd move on. They're both like that with their dalliances.
WHAT WOULD THEY DO UNDER THE FOLLOWING CIRCUMSTANCES?
1. Two serial killers are hunting you down. What will Number 1 [Jason (NAS), Scott (NJD)] do?
They've both been known to get really fuckin' scary when they need to. I'd feel pretty safe with them.
2. You're on a vacation with Number 2 [Sheldon (EDM), Danny (PHI)] and you manage to break your leg. What does Number 2 do?
Danny would laugh at me for breaking my leg in the first place and I'd have to bitch at him because that's how I get when I'm in a lot of pain. And then Sheldon would be really good at taking care of me and Danny would entertain me while I was laid up.
3. It's your birthday. What will 3 [Sean (LAK), Marc (BOS)] give you?
Marc would come up with something thoughtful and personal and sweet and be very proud of himself to give it. Sean would more likely come up with something to do or somewhere to go than come up with an item and it wouldn't be sweet in the least but it would be personal.
4. You're stuck in a house that's on fire. What does Number 4 [Scott (ANA), Ilya (ATL)] do?
Scott would call the fire department, because that's what you do when something is on fire. Ilya would as well, but there wouldn't be English so I would hope he'd just let Scott make the call.
5. You're about to do something that'll make you feel extremely embarrassed. What will Number 5 [Paul (STL), Brian (NJD)] do?
Paul would sit me down and explain that doing this thing will be very embarrassing and I probably shouldn't do it. He won't tell me not to, but he would suggest it's not a good idea. Brian would sit back and watch.
6. You're about to marry Number 10 [Paul (COL), Mario (PIT)]. What's Number 6's [Douglas (SJS), Vinny (TBL)] reaction?
In the first place, why am I marrying Paul or Mario? This does not seem like a good idea. Vinny could get into helping me plan the wedding, but I don't think Douglas could care less.
7. You got dumped by someone. How will Number 7 [Petr (MIN), Dominic (FLA)] cheer you up?
Well, Dominic and I could walk around Boston and talk, that would make me feel a lot better. And then, Petr could be my rebound.
8. You're angry about it afterwards, how does Number 8 [Brian (DET), Sean (NYR)] calm you down?
Sean isn't so good with the calming down thing. He doesn't necessarily get riled often, but when he does, it's quite the explosion. I think fight therapy would be in order there. Maybe Brian could find some inner Swedish and help me calm down, but somehow I doubt it.
9. You compete in some tournament. How does Number 9 [Jarret (LAK), Michael (MTL)] support you?
Michael would come up with some pretty good plans on how I can win the tournament, because I do have to win, that's a rule. Jarret's a pretty good cheerleader. He'd hang out in the friends and family section and cheer me on.
10. You can't stop laughing. What will Number 10 [Paul (COL), Mario (PIT)] do?
Paul would probably start laughing too. Mario would look disapproving.
RELATIONSHIP PART:
1. Is Number 1 [Jason (NAS), Scott (NJD)] is all you've ever dreamed of?
If I could put them into one person and make them female, yes, pretty much exactly.
2. Number 2 [Sheldon (EDM), Danny (PHI)] tells you about his deeply hidden love for Number 9 [Jarret (LAK), Michael (MTL)]. Your reaction?
I'd wonder how they know each other. Danny and Michael could get along to a point, but I don't see any deeply hidden love happening there. Sheldon is rather Jarret's type, so that could be interesting in reverse, but I don't see Sheldon going younger.
3. You're dating Number 3 [Sean (LAK), Marc (BOS)] and introduce him to your parents. Will they get along?
If my mother could get past her idea that Marc kicks puppies, yes, she would like that a lot. She does already like him because of what I told her about what he did for Phil and Ilya, so I think she'd like the idea of it at least. As for Sean? He can make a good impression on mothers, but if she knew how he really was? Probably not.
4. Number 4 [Scott (ANA), Ilya (ATL)] loves Number 9 [Jarret (LAK), Michael (MTL)] as well. What does that mean?
My mind is trying to wrap around a world in which Scott loves Jarret. It hurts my mind too much. Must stop thinking about it. If Ilya had met Michael years ago, well, they might be able to work. But yet again, there's something going on with San Jose here. They need to stop being in the same questions!
5. Number 6 [Douglas (SJS), Vinny (TBL)] appears to be a player, he breaks many hearts. What do you do?
Well, in the sense of 'you can look but you can't touch', they both are. And what do I do about it? Look!
6. You had a haircut and Number 7 [Petr (MIN), Dominic (FLA)] can't stop looking at you. What goes on in your mind?
Well, I'd be flattered coming from Dominic, but from Petr, I'd be worried that I have a mullet.
7. Number 8 [Brian (DET), Sean (NYR)] thinks he'll never get a girlfriend. What will you tell him?
Yes, Sean, I think that's true. You've had lots of pretty beards, but I don't think you'll ever get a real girlfriend because you're simply too gay. And Brian, I don't think your wife would care for you getting a girlfriend. For that matter, I don't think your boyfriend would either.
8. Number 9 [Jarret (LAK), Michael (MTL)] is too shy to face you and confesses their love by sending you an e-mail. Now what?
The idea of either of them being 'too shy' cracks me the hell up. But if they'd like me to be their covers, I'd be more than happy to do that, they can ask me by e-mail.
FRIENDSHIP PART 2:
1. Could Number 1 [Jason (NAS), Scott (NJD)] and Number 6 [Douglas (SJS), Vinny (TBL)] be soul mates?
Jason and Douglas is such a pretty picture. No, they couldn't be soulmates, but oh that would be pretty to watch. Scott and Vinny really couldn't be. Not at all. They couldn't even be friends, they're just too different.
2. Would Number 2 [Sheldon (EDM), Danny (PHI)] trust Number 5 [Paul (STL), Brian (NJD)]?
Everyone can trust Paul. Every single person on the planet. So yes, Sheldon should. Danny doesn't trust anyone, so I don't see him trusting someone on a division rival team, but all in all Brian is trustworthy. Nicky could tell him that.
3. Number 3 [Sean (LAK), Marc (BOS)] wants to go shopping, will Number 7 [Petr (MIN), Dominic (FLA)] come along?
Sean shopping with Petr. That kinda broke my brain. No, I don't think so. And Marc and Dominic? Well, they both know Boston? Um, no, I can't see them shopping either.
4. Number 4 [Scott (ANA), Ilya (ATL)] is bored and pokes Number 10 [Paul (COL), Mario (PIT)]. What happens after that?
Scott really shouldn't poke Paul. Considering Peter was a Devil when Scott rookied, that would really be somewhere they don't want to go. At all. Ever. *shudders* Ilya poking Mario is an image I will now need brain bleach to remove, thank you.
5. Number 5 [Paul (STL), Brian (NJD)] and Number 1 [Jason (NAS), Scott (NJD)] are forced to go back to school together. What study will they pick?
Paul and Jason get along very well, though I would think them going back to school would consist of Paul working very hard and Jason copying off him and then Jason protecting Paul from bullies. It would work. Brian and Scott could perhaps attend music school. Scott could expand his knowledge to pass it on to his kids and Brian can just become a rocker. It would make for an amusing sitcom.
6. If Number 6 [Douglas (SJS), Vinny (TBL)] and Number 3 [Sean (LAK), Marc (BOS)] cooked dinner, what would they make?
Sean enjoys cooking and would tell Douglas to just sit down and make conversation. I have no idea what they'd talk about, the Pacific Division, I guess. Marc and Vinny could actually create a meal together, though. They're both okay in the kitchen, together they could actually make something. I don't know why the Bruins and the Lightning are having a massive team dinner, but I'd blame Marty.
7. Number 5 [Paul (STL), Brian (NJD)] and Number 8 [Brian (DET), Sean (NYR)] apply for a job. What job?
Working in fashion. No wait, listen to how this works. Sean is obvious. Paul could easily be a model. Brian Rolston can play a live soundtrack for the runway show. And Brian Rafalski can be a photographer. Don't ask me, it just happens in my head.
8. Number 8 [Brian (DET), Sean (NYR)] gives Number 7 [Petr (MIN), Dominic (FLA)] a haircut. Is that OK?
No! Brian may not go anywhere near Petr's hair. Brian has no hair, he may not remove Petr's! Sean could possibly work with Dominic's though. He would need to grow it out some, but that could work.
9. Number 9 [Jarret (LAK), Michael (MTL)] sketches what Number 1's [Jason (NAS), Scott (NJD)] perfect girlfriend/boyfriend should look like.
Somehow I don't see this ending well. I don't think Jarret and Jason know each other, but I don't want to know what Michael would come up with for someone like Scott, whom he would only know by reputation. Now, if I can switch that up, Jarret could draw Michael's and Jason could draw Scott's, or vice versa. And they'd have some pretty good ideas.
10. Number 10 [Paul (COL), Mario (PIT)] and Number 3 [Sean (LAK), Marc (BOS)] are blushing while they talk. What is their conversation about?
Oh dear gods, anything that could make any of them blush, besides Marc, has to be somewhere seriously beyond raunchy. I don't think Paul or Sean can blush, and the only way to make Mario blush could be to call him out on being a dope. But even then, I don't know. Marc, though, he could blush if someone brought up certain mistakes in his past.
That was fun! Should I do it for baseball too?