WHY SO TRUE
Been slowly purging my folks' house of all my old stuff in preparation to move to Pittsburgh in a couple months. Going through some old boxes I found TONS of art and writing, some original, most of it fan fiction, and it was amazing. Not like "this is good for middleschool." I'm talking "WHERE THE HELL DID THIS TALENT GO IT'S GOTTA BE IN HERE STILL SOMEWHERE RIGHT? ...R-RIGHT?"
I had to think about it for a while. Back then oh hell dating myself here I don't know if ff.net existed. I only used LJ to post maudlin, hormone-fueled chatter for my rl friends, not to put up writing for comments or critiques. DA was on the verge of being created or had been around for maybe a year and I'd never heard of it. I only read books I loved and watched shows and movies that I cared about. There was no pressure. Writing and drawing only for the hell of it, no audience in mind. Just a glee-filled girl sitting at her computer or her art desk, puttering away for hours and feeling accomplished. And the freedom and joy that was evident in everything I did so many years ago... I want it back.
For me this means duct-taping the mouth shut on my Censor and learning to play again. Who would have thought goofing around would become something you have to relearn? Don't get me wrong, there's plenty of asinine things I do but there's always someone there: a community, a friend, an audience, a camera. As I get older I keep thinking that everything I do must be the means to some end and not just for me. For no one else but me.
So go play.
:)