Psycology
Conditional Positive Regard - the sense that the child is valued and loved only when she behaves in a way that is acceptable to others. The problem with this conditional positive regard is that it causes the child to learn to deny or distort her genuine feelings. Feelings become denied and distorted not because they are threatening but because they contradict the self-concept. As this process continues over time, a person progressively becomes more "out of touch" with her true feelings and her essential self, often experiencing psychological problems as a result.
(Hockenbury, Don H. & Hockenbury, Sandra E. Psychology:Fourth Edition)