A meme. What?
swiped from rosiegalbasi
(1) Name:
Stacey ;p A cursed' name. One of Barbie's little sisters/illegitimate children (btw my dad said that Barbie has a new bf. It was on C fucking NN. Vital information for your everyday lives.) There was also a "Stacy two wheeler" or some such (I so typed suck) thing, while I was in elementary school. That went over like Enola Gay.
(2) Name if you had been born the opposite sex:
-calls over father-
Victor Alan. (Alan being my father's name) Go figure. I'd have been called Vicky. No two ways about it. I'm now sorry I've teased Nick about the Nicky stuff. suXX0r.
(3) Would you name a child of yours after you?
No. No. And I can't stress this enough, no. My name sucks AND no breeding, w00t.
(4) If you had to switch first names with a friend of yours, who would you switch with?
Well since my social life is the suck I'll make this friends past and present....damn I should have been friends with more girls. Lindsey's a nice name. Of course the Lindsey I'm talking about was a guy sooo.
(5) What's the way people most often mispronounce any part of your name?
Schuler. Dude German is not that hard. This is not Polish or Czech. Shoe-ler.
We of course get Shuh-ler. -boggle- The spellings are the best though. I didn't know you could get that many letters in a name.
It might be reasonable to screw it up elsewhere but Saginaw is BEYOND German. I'm surprised we haven't forcibly invaded Bay City*.
People don't screw up saying Stacey but we have spelling issues more often than not. I HATE how girls names have 12 spellings (see Amy) and guys have 1. Just 1. Can't fuck it up unless the parents got cre8ive. Mychal or some suck..such. Freud.
*Bay City is classically Polish. The phone book scares my poor tongue. Yea for bad WWII jokes!
(6) If you were to become famous, would you drop your last name (like Madonna, Cher, Roseanne)?
Gah. I'd change my name altogether. I don't like my name much at all. Always fancied myself a Rebecca or Rachel. I'm hoping I can at least marry up on the last name. My luck however is I'll get man with a similarly craptastic name (and not even get to change my initial cause karma hates me) and he'll be allergic to cats just like Matt.
DEEP THEOLOGICAL QUESTIONS
(7) Do you believe in the traditional view of Heaven and Hell?
Which traditional view? The one where hell is right nextdoor to heaven so the dead who earned their wings could revel in the suffering of sinners? Dante's variant?
(8) Do you think God has a gender?
Does such a trivial thing mater?
(9) Do you think science counteracts religion?
No. Religion (read: man) often refuses to accept science but it isn't so buggery hard to think that God, being the ultimate of ultimates, would lay down some physics to keep shit in line. Man never likes to hear that their creation myth has been smacked down by science and they would rather look at paleontology as a "test of faith" rather than realize that MAN wrote the words and is bound to get things wrong. This doesn't mean walk off from religion but it does mean that you need to evaluate everything in life and take nothing at face value including your text and your preachers. -glares at pervy priests and assbackwards fundies-
-looks back at answer-
Damn I got my preach on. Oops.
(10) Do you believe in organized religion?
Well, it does exist. But it's also stupid.
Word. People in large groups can destroy any and everything given half a chance.
(11) Where do you think we go when we die?
I believe there's more to this world. There has to be a reward and a punishment. I can't buy into this all being a freak accident. The right cocktail of elements placed at the right distance from the sun for proper heating. The right size to hold onto its atmosphere. It's a hell of a blunder to have happened without someone at the wheel.
(12) Do you feel a little funny thinking about the questions in this section?
No. Hell when I did go to church (before the other sheeple got on my LAST damn nerve. "OMG that's the CUTEST dress" "I know! Do you think Tommy will like it?" "OMG he HAS to want to fuck you. He practically said so when Billy asked Matt about what Veronica said about their break up last Sunday")
-cough-
Anyway. When I did go I went on a retreat. There were more people who went for the chance to ski than to focus on God. One boy who went to a non-denominational church in town came along and when we sang he closed his eyes and raised his palms and the other teens pointed and chuckled. -fury- It's called worship you morons. You've grown up in this church. This BAPTIST church. He's hardly speaking in tongues you little....-cough- See. People ruin things. Not even a third of the flock seemed interested in the message. Once at communion our pastor was talking about how much it means to take communion and how much you truly have to mean it. What love and devotion and selflessness. Inviting Jesus to wash your sins away. Giving yourself entirely and walking away from your past transgressions. I cried. People looked at me funny. A few friends even asked what was wrong later. Nothing was wrong. That was just the point. NOTHING was wrong in that moment except for how emotionally detached they were from the ceremony. Detached from God. Maybe some of them had detached simply because it was just that time of the month and not anything new or special but it shouldn't loose that meaning. If I was in a cathedral I'd shudder to think how out of place my quiet tears would have seemed. If I ever try the whole "organized" thing I'm probably going Pentecostal. God should move you or rather you should LET God move you.
-looks up at answer again-
I'm awfully preachy tonight
HUMOUR
(13) How easy is it to make you laugh?
Depents on the mood. If I'm up beat then I'm easily amused. If I'm more laid back you'll get just a smirk or chuckle at best. Not that it's not funny mind you but I'm just -purr- mellow.
(14) What person you know makes you laugh the most?
Egads. I'm never around people these days. Nick, provided he's chatty, gets me to smirk. If Christina finds time to get Thai food she'll make me choke on the hottest dish available just to be difficult.
(15) Do you laugh at jokes you know you shouldn't?
Well Jokes are for laughing at. Yeah I laugh at them. I read Somthing Positive. I follow Fandom_Wank. I still watch cartoons.
Incidentally, if you read Som*Pos it's worth noting that Aubrey's latest scheme does have a website.
(16) Do you tell jokes you know you shouldn't?
I use puns I should probably back away from but that's less of a bad taste in topic issue so much as a bad choice in the method department.
(17) What words instantly make you laugh or at least smile?
Penis.
Not all the time. It's situational. Honestly. If it's a sexual or anatomical discussion where it's appropriate then it's not funny but if you insert it randomly in an unrelated conversation? Comedy gold. Scrotum also works. Sadly (or luckily) female naughty bits are less humorous. Ovaries might work, but no, penis is still funnier.
(18) What do you think is the funniest thing you've ever said or written?
It's hard to judge if you're actually funny. Everyone loves their own jokes and people tend to laugh or smile at things for the sake of social pleasantries instead of just being honest about things. I'm rather proud of a paper I wrote at Delta. The teacher, lovely British prof by the name of Sylvia, had made us read some piece of utter crap written by a friend of Michael Moore. Joy. Rapture. We then had to watch Roger & Me. In my paper I questioned how a teacher could sleep at night after subjecting her students to that. She wrote on my paper "What makes you think I actually sleep?" The words dripped maniacal laughter. Good times. I got an A.
MUSIC
(19) Do you ever dance to music when nobody's watching?
No. I'm just THAT uptight.
(20) What is/are the worst song(s) you have ever heard?
Anything by Avril Lev..iosa? Whatever that puke pile is. In fact lets add Hillary Duff to that pile while we're at it. Catchy as fuck but could it be more trite? And Avril, girlfriend, punk? Really? Pa-leese. I want to shop at Hot Topic too. I like tank tops and wristbands. You are POP. Deal with it.
(21) What song(s) do you wish you could understand a little better?
Jason Mraz songs. It's clear that there are nuances that are more private or in joke based that I'd be interested in. BNL has a lot of songs that are that way too.
(22) What song(s) are constantly in your head?
JC's Dear Goodbye has refused to vacate my mind today.
(23) What song(s) do you think describe your personality best?
Dunno. I never hear a song and think "Hey that's me to a tee" I get that with friends though. I'll hear songs and they make me think of how they've been feeling or who they are but not about myself.
(24) If you were to serenade the object of your affections, which song(s) would you use?
That is so lame it hurts me.
Verily. The lame it doth burn. Fo sheezy.
(25) If the object of your affections were to serenade you, what song(s) would you hope he or she used?
I'd hope the object of my affections wasn't so lame.
Yeah I'll second that one.
MOVIES
(26) What movie(s) do you love that nobody else seems to?
Gosford Park and Real Genius. Yes I realize those don't play nice with one another. No one appreciates the geek comedies and no one likes having to actually pay attention during a movie. I've known people to watch Gosford Park all the way through and not know who the killer was. o_0
(27) Do you agree with the idea that sequels are always worse than the original?
Not always. X-Men 2 was as good as the original. Spiderman 2 was the same way. RotK, while not a sequel, was the best of the LotR films. But usually the sequels are worse.
There's a great point in Kelley's answer. Most sequels are slapped together when something does better than expected. The above films are parts of a larger whole. There is so much canon to pull from that they can pull in what they know has worked in the past and build it up another level.
(28) Who's your favorite Star Wars character?
What is this "Star wars" of which you speak. I haven't seen them. At least not at such an age that I can remember them. I remember Space Balls though. Barf was kick ass. Bill Pullman was my first crush. Lone Starr. *sigh*
(29) What kind of movie do you think there should be more of?
Non-cliched ones. Where there either is no bad guy or the bad guy wins or just something that isn't the same old stuff over and over.
Word. Bring on the grey area! I like a movie where you have to pay attention. Mindless entertainment can be nice but a film with real plot twists and one that doesn't lay out its hand immediately would be nice. Vanilla Sky please.
Also, while I'm controlling Hollywood, Can I have a few good slasher flicks where the murderer is a chick. Just asking. American Psycho 2 was kinda neat that way.
(30) What movie(s) do you simply not understand the appeal of?
Crappy teen films, sappy romance movies, true life stories that are so blown out of proportion they are no longer real life...
I second the sappy romance. It works in Moulin Rouge only because it's silly. Romantic Comedies are allowed. Pure romance? -gag-
-Huggles Bridget Jones' Diary-
FOOD
(31) When eating, are you more concerned with taste or healthiness?
I try to think health but convenience is such a bitch.
(32) What's your favorite kind of cheese?
Lactose Intolerance'd
(33) What do you think your answer to the previous question reveals about your personality?
Umm....Things can annoy me greatly?
Oooh that was good! What did I win?
(34) If you knew exactly what went into Chinese food, hamburger meat, etc., would you still eat it?
Is it cooked? Provided my tummy doesn't stage a violent coup then it's all good.
(35) Do you ever feel guilty eating meat?
When the creator of this meme starts feeling bad about designing guilt trip questions into the survey then yes, I'll feel very vewwy bad about it. Until that time I ask you, Where's the beef?
COMPUTERS
(36) Mac or PC?
They have their strengths. I'm not sure what the PCs strengths are per say but I'm sure there's more too it than an nice graphic interface. I'd prolly switch over if it wasn't for the fact that entertainment software is classically geared towards PCs and I'm really terribly used to my layout. I always forgot to close IE on Matt's mac. I'm used to the X being all powerful.
(37) How much do you actually care about the inner workings of your computer, as long as it works?
My computer and I have a "don't ask, don't tell" policy. I don't ask it to do great feats and it doesn't crash on me because I over heated it's ass.
(38) Do you ever begin preferring IMs to other forms of conversation?
"Do you ever begin preferring?"
-rewrite-
(38) Do you prefer IMs to other forms of conversation?
I prefer face to face over IM but IMs over the phone. I'm fine once I'm on the phone but it seems less annoying to poke someones AIM window and then bugger off if they aren't chatty rather than call them up and bug them. Stacey has phone "issues"
(39) Do you find you're different talking through IMs than face-to-face or on the telephone?
I can't spell to save my soul. Thanks American public schools! So in IMs I dumb down my language since I can't always spell what I want to say. That pisses me off a lot. The other problem is that people type WAY FUCKING FASTER than I do so I end up using short phrases to get my point across as best I can so I can try to keep up.
(40) Have you ever bid on something on eBay and regretted it later?
Hell no. I got the first 4 Harry Potter books, lightly worn SS, mint Cos-Gof for just over $10. Even with shipping it came in under $15. Ebay owns.
THE BATTLE OF THE SEXES
(41) Have you ever wished you could experience being the other gender?
Well guys have an easier go at getting sterilized at least. However the idea of having the most sensitive part of my body easily accessible to anyone with even the slightest grudge towards me is less than comforting.
(42) What do you love most about the other gender?
Men can get away with shit that girls can't which is pretty cool. Although, to be fair, we weasel out of things in ways that guys can't. The yin and yang of avoiding responsibility.
(43) What do you dislike most about the other gender?
See above but replace "pretty cool" with "fucking annoying"
(44) What do you understand least about the other gender?
Why I'm always friend material but little else.
CELEBRITIES
(45) Do you sometimes see a movie or watch a show just because a good-looking celebrity is in it?
No. My tolerance for sucking ends in the bedroom. -rimshot-
(46) What celebrity's autograph do you want most?
Clay Aiken.
.
.
.
What?
Side note: I have the autographs of Rider Strong (Boy Meets World), Joseph Mazello (Jurassic Park), The Moffets, Blessed Union of Souls, and a load of NASCAR drivers: Bobby and Terry Labonte, Jeff and Ward Burton, Ricky Craven, Ricky Rudd, Jimmie Johnson, Casey Mears, and Scott Riggs; and an owner: Jack Roush.
(47) Have people ever said you looked like a celebrity, and if so, who?
I used to get Janeane Garofalo.
IIRC someone at Fish Lake (though I can't remember who) said I looked like a comedian (I think) but I can't remember who it was. -pout- If Nick reads this maybe he was there. Hell he might have said it. -shrug-
(48) If there was to be a movie about you, who do you think should play you (in personality, looks or both)?
I'd hope they'd just grab some random chick off the street to play me. Literally. That way she'll be just as confused as I am about the entire movie deal.
(49) Does it ever annoy you when you know someone is a celebrity but you can't remember why?
If you can't remember why then they are hardly a celebrity. It bothers me when people are famous without reason. -coughparishiltoncough- It also irks me when I'm watching something and go "Oh! it's that guy! You know from that movie...what the hell was that movie? Who the hell is he?" -Pets IMDB.com-
(50) If you could enter any celebrity's mind like in "Being John Malkovich", whose would you enter?
Into his mind as in control him? I'd find someone very rich. I'd arrange for a wedding in a state where the laws would favor me and without a pre-nup. -teehee-
(51) Do you want to be John Malkovich?
No but I do want to watch Shadow of the Vampire all of a sudden.
NUMBERS
(52) Do you laugh when you hear or read the number 69?
No. Canker sores suck.
(53) Were you lying about your answer to the previous question?
No. Canker sores really do suck.
(54) Do you actually know your Social Security Number?
Not so much
(55) Do you actually know your IP address?
Nope.
(56) Do you know what an IP address is?
Dur
(57) Do you know the four-character extension on your ZIP code?
No.
(58) Ever thought there were too many numbers floating around in our lives?
There are a lot of numbers but that's why God gave us paper, phone books and cell phones. I'm bad with number memorization. I've lived the same place my whole life (not counting dorms) so I've memorized very few.
(59) Does your head begin to hurt when you think of infinity, imaginary numbers, irrational numbers, etc.?
*sigh* Really stretching for questions aren't we? If you aren't enrolled in a math class or employed in a related field I suggest ignoring the concepts entirely.
(60) What do you think of pi?
That it should have an "e" at the end so more people would like it.
-snerk- Love that.
::brace for bad puns::
Oh don't get me started! I could just go on forever!
LOVE, SEX AND ALL THAT
(61) Did you get a little frightened or uncomfortable seeing this as a section title?
Not so much.
(62) If someone you had no interest in dating expressed interest in dating you, how would you feel?
What? Like women and jailbait and men who's previous sexual encounters include vegetables?
>_<
It's irritating if the person is a nice guy or gal and I have to turn them down but if the person is beneath me (rare I know) there is an odd glee in turning them down...in theory. I'll let you know if anyone like that approaches me.
(63) Do you prefer getting to know someone first before dating them or going in "blind"?
I've always known the person first, but that doesn't seem to be working so well.
That's funny. I've never known the person first, but that doesn't seem to be working so well.
(64) Could you carry on a relationship with someone with the same first name as a family member?
Family names not a problem. I'm close to banning Matts though.
(65) Have you ever wished it was more "socially acceptable" for a girl to ask a guy out?
Are people still on about that? I don't ask out guys because of social mores but because my (well placed) fear of rejection is massive.
(66) What's your opinion on sex without emotional commitment?
Evil phrasing. I think most people who sleep with bfs/gfs aren't "emotionally committed" I wasn't in lurve with Matt when we made with the Barry White album. If this is supposed to read, as Kelley read it, as more of a "what's your view on sex outside of a relationship with even the potential for emotional commitment?" then -shrug-
Friends with benefits can be done so long as communication is smooth. You make your intentions clear and if either party gets warm and fuzzy beyond reason then it needs to be talked out and dealt with accordingly (move forward with a relationship or move back to just friends*).
*added because "dealt with accordingly" sounds like there's a hit out on the other party.
(67) Have you ever been romantically attracted to someone physically unattractive?
I've realized how icky some of my bfs have been after we broke up. Does that count?
(68) Do you think the opposite sex finds you good-looking?
Mwahaha -cough-
I've never caught a guy checking me out. More than once at meals this came up while at MSU every girl at the table could agree that men are SOOO obvious when looking at them. Unable to move the eyes independently of their heads. "It happens so often," they'd say. "Oh yes all the time," says a girl heavier than I with glasses, grody hair and acne. "I'll be over there in the corner crying my eyes out," I'd have said if not for the fact I had Matt at the time. Fluke that he was.
I look in the mirror and, while I'm not happy with what I see, I know it's not bad. I get on well with men. I always have more male friends than female. I'm never quite sure what I'm doing wrong.
(69) Would you be willing to give up sex in exchange for an emotional commitment you knew would last?
This is a doomed dichotomy. Sex is a healthy part of an emotional commitment. A purely sexual relationship won't last. An emotional relationship without sex won't last. They go together if it's going to be lasting.
(70) Do you think the number of the last question was a coincidence?
Not clever. Imma deduct 10 cool points. It's a good thing we aren't playing strip Happy Days game. /bad Friends reference
POSSESSIONS
(71) What is your favorite possession?
My computer or more to the point the Internet connectivity there of. -squee-
(72) What physical, tangible possession do you want most?
Is a man considered a possession?
(73) How badly do you want it?
I'm coping well enough without one but they look so shiny in the store.
(74) Have you ever seen 'The Exorcist'?
Most of it. I always come in late with movies
(75) How long did it take you to understand why the last question is in this section?
-looks back at section title-
Oh you get five of your cool points back. But I'm still made about the veggie stuff.
HOLIDAYS
(76) Does Christmas music too far away from Christmas annoy you?
Christmas music annoys me ON Christmas, so yes.
Yeah most Christmas music is teh suck. What I hate is stores busting out the Christmas junk before Halloween. Two months early is just too much.
(77) How old do you think you will be before you stop pooping older?
WTF does that mean?
I second the question.
(78) What was the best Halloween costume you ever had?
None were ever good. Homemade costumes suck that way. Did buy a Scream costume once. Best outdoor decoration when used in conjunction with a door mat the screams.
We graduated HS in green. I'm fairly certain with a little work I can weasel out a Slytherin quidditch player costume.
(79) What was the worst Halloween costume you ever had?
Just about any of them.
(80) What holiday do you think has still managed to retain its original meaning?
Whichever ones Hallmark created. If they didn't make it up then the original meaning doesn't exist.
(81) There are currently no federal holidays during August - what should be put there?
There's plenty to August. For instance, August second is National Ice Cream Sandwich Day. Recognize!
MEMORIES
(82) How good is your short-term memory?
Decent assuming I'm focused enough.
(83) How good is your long-term memory?
Again good provided that I care enough to remember.
(84) What is your earliest memory?
Let's not talk about that Doctor.
(85) What is your happiest memory?
I'll get back to you on that one
(86) What is your strangest memory?
Meh?
(87) What song, movie, etc. do you wish you could memorize?
Ooo I have a better answer for "what burns you about the opposite gender?" Men's seemingly natural ability to remember and quote damn near everything. I meet guys who can spew forth verbatim Monty Python and all I can think is "damn it! I carried around the script to Grail in high school! We went through it at lunch some days. We fought over parts! RAWR!"
TEARS
(88) What movie makes/made you cry?
Most honestly. I cried at Harry Potter..I think. I can't think of why I would have but I probably did. Odds and all that. I cried watching Ya Ya si sterhood the other night. I'm a softie.
(89) What book makes/made you cry?
I read slowly so I don't get the proper emotional build up most often plus I normally know the story before hand. I cried reading Death Gate Cycle though.
(90) What song makes/made you cry?
There are a few songs that just nail me. Garth Brooks "The Dance", Tim McGraw"Don't take the Girl" , Mark Willis "Wish You were Here".
Death in a country song will get me evidently.
(91) What makes/made you laugh so hard you cried?
Family gatherings. We are such a weird bunch. I love it.
THREE TRULY RANDOM QUESTIONS
(92) Would you like to be cloned?
Well I'm not so in love with my DNA that I could justify breeding so I'd hardly condone cloning myself.
(93) Do you wish you could be alive when the world was ending, just to experience it?
Why would you? Have ya read revelations? Did you not see "The Day After'? Gah!
(94) Scaramouche, scaramouche?
Will you do the fandango?
THIS SURVEY
(95) Do you think that one hundred and one questions is too long?
Probably, but I'm bored.
Yeah, I'll go with that.
(96) Do you think the one hundred interesting questions actually were interesting?
This one sure isn't.
Yeah, I'll go with that one too.
(97) Are you sorry you began filling it out?
I'm sure as hell starting to.
(98) What question do you wish it had asked?
Seeing people's concepts of romance could be interesting. Myself, I don't like getting jewelry since I rarely wear any and I don't like flowers. They cost way too much for something that will die within a week.
(99) How would you have answered it?
...
THE TWO MOST IMPORTANT QUESTIONS
(100) When was the last time you let the people you love know you love them?
I don't say it enough to my parents. Damn your guilt trip questions!
(101) What do you want the people who are reading this survey to know?
Yeah, man. I'll gnaw your face off. -Teh C